by Cate Masters
Buck gestured to the photographer. “I hate to admit it, but Hayden’s right. The guides at the Icehotel know more than I do.”
Melanie’s jaw hardened. “We hired you for five days, didn’t we?”
Shit, she pulled that card? He clenched his teeth. “Yes.”
“Then it’s settled.”
Didn’t see it coming. Should have. “Fine.”
Anger should have erased all thought of her kiss. Instead, it inflamed the image, rendering her naked, kissing him harder.
Huh. Didn’t see that coming either. Should have.
Chapter 10
Melanie was at a loss for what to say to Buck. She shouldn’t have spoken so rudely to him earlier. Bossy people turned her off, and probably irritated the hell out of him. But if she hadn’t, he wouldn’t have come to the Icehotel. She might never have seen him again.
She couldn’t let that happen.
Ignoring Hay’s whines, she and her crew stayed while the vet examined Gunnar. When the vet had reassured Buck the husky would be fine, it relieved some of her guilt. They hadn’t spoken at all during the ride to the Icehotel. After they had arrived, he had climbed out of the sleigh first. Nostrils flaring, he had extended a hand to help her down.
So sweet. Even when he’s angry, he looks out for me. She felt like a princess descending from a royal carriage. As the others climbed out, she studied the Icehotel.
From the outside, it didn’t look like much. An oversized maze of igloos, or like a snow fort walled in by a frozen fence, with an abstract snow sculpture in the center courtyard. A plain white structure against the pink February sky.
For Valentine’s Day. Amazing, she’d almost forgotten, and hadn’t thought about Pete in awhile. It no longer upset her that she couldn’t feel his presence. In fact, now his absence seemed fitting. The way it was supposed to be.
It registered that her crew had wandered inside, so she followed them through a set of fur-covered doors encased in ice blocks. Within the walls that arched to the ceiling, a forest of snow branches reached upward, meeting at the tall pinnacle above a reception desk of ice so clear, it might have been cut from crystal. Corridors opened from either side.
A man greeted them, and she said, “Hello.” When Hayden shot her a confused look, she knew she hadn’t given her usual introductory spiel.
“Melanie Michaels?” His gaze bounced between her and Gina.
“Yes, I’m Melanie.” She shook his hand. “Thank you for having us.”
He bowed his head. “Our pleasure. May I give you a brief tour?”
“Please do.”
He gestured to the hallway on the right and led them past thick columns of ice down a longer hallway decorated with illuminated ice sculptures—a moon of snow atop a frozen star and what might have been a child’s cutout of an evergreen, but rendered in ice. Two ice-crystal chandeliers drew them farther down another space, with openings like snow caves on either side leading to more passageways.
“Hope none of us gets lost,” Melanie whispered to Gina.
“Yep, I’m no good at mazes.” Gina touched the wall plaque. “At least they mark the areas.”
One ended in a gallery space, spotlighting an intricate snow sculpture of a unicorn rising from a patch of tundra. Hayden, Gina, and Vic captured the ephemeral building on camera.
“Incredible.” She ran a finger along the sculpted arches in the frozen wall. As cold inside as it had been outside, but so beautiful she hardly noticed. A blue glow bathed the interior with an otherworldly atmosphere. She wouldn’t have been surprised to see Pete among the guests, but only the living, bundled in thick parkas, mingled within, each with the same look of delight and wonder she must be wearing.
Buck stayed to the rear of the group and didn’t answer, but his expression echoed the sentiment as he scanned the interior.
The descriptions she’d read hadn’t exaggerated. Absolutely everything in the hotel had been crafted from ice and snow. Tables, chairs, a mantle over an ice hearth, an intricate chandelier of frozen teardrops, even the drinking cups. The crystallized structures magnified the light so every part of the room glowed, even the frozen walls.
“We reserved the best room for you,” the man told her.
“May I see it?” She couldn’t help her giddiness. Photos didn’t do the place justice. The designs changed every year, and the little girl in her had hoped for something magical, and this place did not disappoint.
“Certainly. This way.” He led them past the Icebar, another glowing, crystalline block with tall columns for seats. Another large room held two rows of ice-block beds covered with reindeer skins. Pendant lights made of packed snow, mimicking frosted glass, hung from the ceiling, somehow lit from within. They exited through another wide door to another outdoor courtyard.
“Your room is separate from the main building. Here we are.” The man stopped in front of a domed doorway into a smaller igloo, opened it, and stood to one side.
Her breath caught. More ice blocks comprised the bigger-than-king-size bed and was likewise lit from within, with more reindeer skins strewn atop. For a headboard, a carved waterfall cascaded from the ceiling in lovely swirls and flowed around the bed. A loveseat of ice sat in front of another “fireplace,” with LED candles atop the mantle lending a romantic air. A wall of ice, likewise lit from behind, was etched with an amazingly detailed tree. The glow accentuated the detail of the carved branches and intricate leaves.
“I feel like Alice in Ice Wonderland.” She set down her bag and strolled through, touching each sculpture. “I love it.”
“Once you’re settled, please join us at the bar.” With another bow, the man strode out.
After making a video sweep of the room, Hay switched off his camera. “I’m freezing. Again.”
“After tomorrow night, we’ll be on our way home.” Sadness pricked at her. She sought out Buck and his somber expression surprised her. “I don’t know about you guys, but I need a drink.”
“You read my mind.” Hayden disappeared out the door.
Gina and Vic followed close behind.
Buck stared at her, his hungry expression not unlike a wolf’s. In her mind, she walked up to him, slid her hands into his, and led him to the bed…
“We better go before they come looking for us.” His soft, husky voice said otherwise.
“One of the drawbacks of this place. Not much privacy.” Her face flushed warm. Idiot! Go ahead, bare your thoughts like a striptease dance. Why not ask him to strip too?
His brow furrowed. A low growl, then he coughed.
Shit, she was botching this. Badly. Had it been so long since she’d been alone with a man that she’d forgotten how to talk to one? “Buck…”
“The bar’s back this way.” He gestured, then raked a hand through his hair.
He looks like he needs a drink worse than me. “Let’s go.” Obviously, she was rushing it. Rushing him and probably herself. Take things slow. Talk. Except time was running out, and it wasn’t something she could force.
Back outside, they crossed the few yards to the main structure and meandered down the corridor. Techno music grew louder as they entered the Icebar. She ignored Hayden’s glare and pointed to a table in the corner. “Here.”
“What about them?” Buck kept his gaze on hers and jerked his head in the direction of her crew, who stood around a tall circular table of ice only feet from the bar.
“They can get along on their own.” She mustered her courage. “Buck, I want to apologize.”
At the same time, he said, “I’m sorry if I offended you earlier.”
They exchanged confused glances.
“Why are you apologizing?” he asked.
“Because I was rude to you,” she said. “Why are you sorry?” He had no need to be.
“I acted like a jerk. I didn’t mean to get so angry.”
Sounded like he was more disappointed in himself than anything. “No, yo
u were right.”
Focusing on her, he tilted his head as if he hadn’t heard right. “I was?”
“Absolutely. I’m the one who should apologize. To so many people.” For three years of stupid stunts, pushing her luck to the brink. Trying like hell to be in that space between worlds with Pete, no matter how briefly, and endangering others despite swearing she never would.
His glance slid left and right. “Is there a camera hidden somewhere? Is this a joke?”
Of course he didn’t trust her. She needed to earn it. “If it is, the joke’s on me. And I am sorry. I’d never do anything to hurt your dogs.”
Warily, he eased to sit beside her. “You wouldn’t.”
“Never. I love dogs. I’d love to have one or two of my own if…” If she had the life she was supposed to have. The one she’d planned.
Instead of a grin, his wince was lopsided. “If you weren’t a TV star.”
She attempted a smile. “If I didn’t travel so much.”
A waiter appeared and asked for their order. Buck ordered an Absolut vodka, straight up. Much as she’d love another chocolate martini, she asked for the same but on the rocks, even though they served drinks in cubes of hollow ice. A nod, and the server strode off.
She frowned at him. “Why do you call yourself Buck?”
“Instead of Joe?” He rubbed his stubbled chin with a soundless laugh. “I liked Rocky, but Kenny pointed out that Rocky Wright sounded cartoonish, and he didn’t favor being called Bullwinkle. Zeus seemed a bit presumptuous. Woody might’ve scared off the female clientele. Buck made me sound like I fit into the landscape.”
Too natural a fit, she’d noticed. Like the spring thaw might not be enough to extract him from it. “I suppose. But when Mr. Towson first mentioned you, my mind jumped to ‘buck naked,’ and I hoped you had many layers of clothing beneath your down jacket.”
“Huh. Never occurred to me.”
She had. More than she cared to admit. “And here I thought you were being a tease.”
“Not intentionally. Can I help my raw sex appeal?” His lopsided smile betrayed his modesty beneath the teasing.
For her, not a joke. Raw described it perfectly—a sex appeal so close to the surface, she found it painfully apparent. No wonder that pilot’s flirtations had almost a desperate quality. His machismo affected her, too.
Thankfully, the server returned with their vodkas, and set the ice glasses in front of them, then left.
She sipped. “I’m sorry about the way I acted. I hope you don’t tell your girlfriend.”
His smile changed to a smirk. “I don’t have a girlfriend.”
Was he teasing? “Anakarina said otherwise.”
The smirk deepened. “Look, I know I’m not Adonis, or whoever the god of love’s supposed to be. It’s no reason to insult me.”
She leaned nearer, and her elbow grazed his. Even through their mutual parkas, the touch sent a spark of electricity through her. “I didn’t mean it as an insult.”
He widened his eyes in mock sincerity. “Of course not. It was a perfectly innocent request.” He gulped half his drink.
“It was.” She eased back. “Okay, no it wasn’t. I’m curious.”
“Why?” The alcohol turned his voice coarse.
Either the vodka had already begun working on her, or his husky tone turned up the heat. “Because I wondered.”
“My personal life is off limits to your reality show.” He sipped more slowly, watching her.
“I know.” She spoke deliberately and hoped he’d understand her meaning.
“You’re asking as a concerned citizen?”
Hoo boy. She imbibed more one-hundred-proof fortification. “No. An interested one.”
He narrowed his eyes at her. “Interested how?”
Her mood, like her head, lightened. “Do you interrogate every woman who asks you personal questions?”
Half a frown appeared. “Only when they have a camera crew at their beck and call.”
“My crew’s out of hearing range. I’m not wearing a microphone.” She had to stop herself from adding, baby.
His gaze swept in their direction, then over the glass walls as if to uncover some hidden recording device. “This conversation’s strictly between us?”
She flared her eyes wide. “Strictly.” Which brought up all sorts of naughty punishments she’d like to use on him.
“In that case…” He stared ahead, though she would swear he had no interest in the icy architecture.
Stop torturing me. “Yes?”
His Adam’s apple bobbed. “I have no interest.”
Her bubbly mood popped. “Oh.” Gay? Impossible. Her gaydar had never failed her. Besides, she’d have known, especially with him. “None, whatsoever?” Damn, that last word came out as a squeaky whine. She sounded weak—something she hadn’t been for years.
He took a sudden interest in the fur on the seat beneath him. “Not in a relationship.”
“Even temporary?”
He cocked a brow. “Kind of an oxymoron, isn’t it?”
“Not at all. I’ve had some very intense relationships that lasted only a short while.” None that she could recall offhand, but she must’ve. At some point.
Another smirk. “Congratulations.”
No getting around the bitterness in his tone. Not without diluting it with sweetness. She had some ideas about that. The problem was, he might not listen. She’d have to resort to the one thing she’d avoided all these years. Honesty.
She gulped more vodka, but if anything, it made her more self-conscious rather than less. Just tell him. “I’ll lay it out.” Here goes nothing. And everything. “I’m very attracted to you.” Harder to admit than she thought. She couldn’t even look him in the eye when she’d said it. Or when he failed to answer for a few killer moments, though she could feel his stare on her.
Finally, he muttered, “I’m not part of the deal.”
Her gaze snapped to his. “What?”
His expression pained, he said, “I’m sure all the other guys leap at the chance—”
“All the other guys?” What the hell? Seriously?
“Don’t get me wrong. I’m very attracted to you too. I just can’t.”
Anger seeped up slowly, gathering for a strike. “Are you suggesting I sleep with every guide? That I’m a slut?”
He heaved a breath. “I have no idea, Ms. Michaels.”
A little late for formalities. “Don’t give me that Ms. Michaels crap. Is this payback for hurting your doggies?” Oh shit. Wrong attitude.
“My…” His ears reddened, and his nose flared. An adorable combination, if he weren’t aiming his pissiness at her. “Look, whatever your game is—”
“I’m not playing any game. I was trying to come onto you, stupid.” And trying harder to keep her voice down so no one else would hear, but now she could care less what they thought.
“By insulting me? What’s your knock-em-dead move? Telling me how lucky I am to finally have you?” He raised his glass to his lips.
“Don’t be an ass,” she hissed. “I’d never… Wait. Did you say finally?”
He flinched. “No.”
“Yes you did.” Gotcha! Her floaty mood returned. “Don’t deny it.”
He visibly composed himself. “It might have slipped out.”
Her libido did a happy dance. “A Freudian slip. So you have thought about it?”
He gave her an oh-come-on look. “I have a pulse, Melanie. Who wouldn’t think about it?”
No one else she cared about. “Then you at least find me somewhat attractive?”
“Quit fishing. I already said I did.” His poutiness had returned.
Further confirming her guess. “Don’t lay it on so thick, you’ll make me swoon.” What was with the hard-to-get act?
He laughed. “Like that’s even possible. Oh wait, you already did.”
A flash of white heat acro
ss her neck and chest propelled her off the seat. She slammed back the remaining vodka. Vaguely her cheeks registered the cold, but anger killed the warning in her head. “Insensitive jerks like you remind me why I shouldn’t. You think I’m the person on TV? The foolish girl who ignores the warnings and leaps off cliffs into rocky waters below? Or jumps from airplanes or swims in underwater caves?”
He was all seriousness now. “Aren’t you?”
She sank to the ice block. “Outwardly. Not inside. No one knows who I am inside. What I am.”
Doubt crossed his face. “What are you?”
She could barely whisper, “Broken.” Just when she’d started to heal, she shattered all over again.
Brow furrowed, he stared at her intently. “From the physical stress of the stunts?”
Were all men so thick? “Heartbroken.” She hadn’t meant to be so blunt with him. She didn’t even care if anyone else had heard. She needed him to hear. To understand.
Maybe he had. With one word, she’d broken through the hard exterior he’d put up around himself.
Buck’s intense expression hadn’t changed. “So, it’s true.”
Oh shit, here it comes. The rumors thrown back at her. Denying everything would require too much of her. She didn’t have the energy. “I was engaged to a wonderful guy. Pete.” How long had it been since she’d said his name to anyone besides herself? Hearing it out loud came like a slap.
“And he died.”
“Yes. He died.” She blinked back tears. “Do you know what today should have been?”
Something registered in his face. He must have remembered today was Valentine’s Day, a common enough day for weddings. “Oh, shit.”
“Shit indeed.” She drained the last drop from her glass.
“That’s what your show’s about? No Boundaries means you want to break through the only boundary keeping you from him?”
“Yes. And what a unique spin.” Freaking wonderful. She’d just admitted the one thing she’d never told anyone.
If he signaled her crew to corroborate her story, so be it, but he’d find only disappointment. She’d deny it, and that would end any chance with him. She couldn’t stick around to watch, so fled.
