by Rose Pearson
Amelia sighed heavily. “I have always said to Claudia that you can judge someone’s character based on what company they keep,” she said, softly. “Claudia knows this and, in pointing out the roguish character of Lord Worthing, she is warning me to be careful.”
“Oh.” Harmonia looked as disappointed as Amelia felt, looping her hand through Amelia’s arm.
Trying her best not to be entirely disillusioned, Amelia patted Harmonia’s hand and gave a quiet laugh. “Now, there is no need to look so despondent, my dear. I am quite sure there are a great many gentlemen who shall be just as handsome and even more amiable than he. After all, I am not about to lose my heart to the first gentleman to show me particular attention now, am I?”
“I hope not,” Harmonia murmured, quietly. “But then again, you have always been so sensible when it comes to such things.”
“Quite,” Amelia replied, her eyes still on Lord Northfell. “Quite so, Harmonia.”
“And who was that you were dancing with?”
Lord Arthur Northfell sighed and shook his head. “It is of little importance, Worthing.”
“I think not!” Lord Worthing replied, a wild gleam in his eye. “Is that not one the Duke of Westbrook’s daughters?”
Arthur frowned, a slight stab of anxiety in his heart. “It is, I believe,” he answered, cautiously. “Although it was only one dance so do not start believing that I am in any way –”
“Looking for a husband, or so I’ve heard,” Lord Worthing interrupted, rubbing his hands together. “They all are – but it’s usually the eldest first, is it not?” He chuckled, his eyes still on the lady in question. “You might have a tumble with her.”
“Keep your voice down!” Arthur hissed, heat creeping up his neck almost at once. “You know that I am no longer that man.”
Worthing snorted, disdain in his eyes. “You care too much, Northfell. That soft heart of yours is what has you in this position.”
Anger burst into Arthur’s veins. “You have no idea of what I have endured, Worthing. Needless to say, I am filled with regret at my actions. I will not ever return to that way of living again.”
Lord Worthing took a step back, his eyes assessing and look shrewd. “You are a changed man, after all, Northfell,” he murmured, as though surprised. “I had not thought you would be so changed.”
Arthur felt his fury die away just a little. “I am not that same man, nor will I ever be again,” he replied, firmly. “Do not think that you are able to tempt me back into such a way of living again.”
“Then I do not think we shall remain acquaintances,” Lord Worthing replied, sniffing with an almost sneering look. “I have no time for a man such as you.”
A flurry of relief filled Arthur’s heart, and he simply nodded. “Very good, Lord Worthing,” he replied, giving his once-friend a short bow. “Good evening to you.”
By the time he looked up, Lord Worthing had gone and, with it, all the reminders of his former life. Arthur sighed heavily to himself, going in search of a glass of ratafia.
The truth was, he did not miss the way he had once lived, nor did he miss the friends he had once thought the best in the world. Reality had been forced upon him until he had realized just how selfish a life he had been living. A life that had brought pain and suffering to others, whilst he had called it enjoyment. It was shameful and yet, it still clung to him like dirt that could not be removed no matter how many times he washed.
He had felt something for Lady Amelia and had pushed that feeling away almost at once. He was not worthy, could not be worthy of a creature as beautiful as she. The calm look in her eyes had told him that she was considering him carefully, not falling into his arms as so many previous ladies had done. Yet, the warmth of her smile and blush of her cheeks had said that she was not immune to his charms.
And now, it seemed, she was searching for a husband.
Arthur was surprised to discover that his feelings on the subject were not as terrible as they had once been. He had shunned such a thought for many a year, thinking that matrimony meant death to a life of freedom and happiness. Now, however, the idea of having Lady Amelia on his arm as his bride brought something of a warm glow to his heart.
Could it be possible? Could he ever consider the lady? She would have to discover, at some point, the truth about his past and might well reject him outright for it, which he could not blame her for. But, then again, she might be sensible enough to hear him out and consider what he had to say.
His eyes somehow found her again. Her expression was tinged with sadness, as though she had discovered something that had brought her a great deal of disappointment. Had someone spoken to her of him already? Was his cause already lost?
Her eyes met his for a moment, before darting away again. Arthur saw the pinking of her cheeks and his resolve grew. She was interested in him, at least, so he saw no reason not to pursue her. It might all come to naught in the end, but at least he could pride himself on trying to make her his own. That was worth something, at least.
Chapter 4
The following morning, Amelia rose and made her way to the dining room, fully prepared to endure hours of chattering about who had danced with who, what gentlemen they had met and what gentleman, if any, might call on them. However, much to her surprise, she discovered that it was only Harmonia who had chosen to rise and break her fast. A swirl of relief filled her as her sister greeted her, glad she could keep her morning quiet for a little while longer.
“I can tell you are relieved that Jacintha and Jessica are not here,” Harmonia commented drily, as Amelia collected herself a plate of breakfast items.
Amelia could not help but chuckle. “Indeed, their constant chattering in the carriage home last evening was almost too much for me to take! I am glad for the silence, I confess.”
Harmonia’s smile faded. “Do you have a great deal on your mind?”
Amelia shook her head, pouring herself a cup of tea. “No, not particularly. Why do you ask?”
“I had thought you might be upset about Lord Northfell,” Harmonia commented quietly.
“Upset?” Amelia repeated, surprised. “No, not upset in the least. I have not decided whether I would continue my acquaintance with him, even if he was interested in pursuing such a thing, but that does not mean he was on my mind.” She tried to smile, knowing that her thoughts had been particularly inclined towards Lord Northfell last evening but that she had tried her utmost to set him from her mind before she had retired. The man had confused her terribly and although Claudia had done her best to advise her as best as she could, the decision about whether or not to continue her acquaintance with him – if he wished it, that was – had nagged at her mind.
“Well, I am glad to hear you were not unduly restless over him, then,” Harmonia continued, with a smile. “Although to hear Jacintha and Jessica talk, I am quite sure they will have been up all night thinking about all the gentlemen they have lost their hearts to!”
Amelia laughed aloud, aware of just how dizzy her younger sisters had been over their time at Almacks. “It is only their first foray into society for some time,” she reminded Harmonia, still smiling. “I am quite sure they will settle down soon enough.”
Harmonia looked suddenly pensive, making Amelia frown. “Is something troubling you?”
“I confess that there is,” Harmonia replied, heavily. “As you know, I had to dance last evening with our cousin.”
“Yes, I was aware that it was only you who managed to capture his attention,” Amelia replied, buttering her toast. “I did feel sorry for you, having had to endure his company.”
There was no immediate reply. Amelia felt as though she had said something wrong, for Harmonia began to frown, her eyes growing distant. Amelia thought to say something more but then chose to refrain, thinking that she should allow her sister some time to think.
Harmonia sighed heavily, her shoulders slumping. “I have thought that, mayhap, I should just wed Luke.”
> Amelia blinked, dropping her butter knife in surprise. It clattered on her plate, making her jump. Muttering an apology, Amelia picked it up hastily, setting her toast back on her plate.
“I can see that I have astonished you,” Harmonia said, wryly.
“But why?” Amelia exclaimed, her surprise still mounting. “You do not care for Luke – none of us do! He is reserved and appears so indifferent towards us all! He lacks good conversation, appears to have no wit whatsoever and certainly does not appear to care for anyone but himself! Why would you tie yourself to such a man?”
“You are aware of his faults, then,” Harmonia replied, with a lift of her eyebrow. “I will not pretend that he is not all of those things, but he is something of ruthless man as you know.” She lifted her cup to her lips and took a sip, forcing Amelia to bite her tongue, choosing to pick up her own teacup in an attempt to silence the many questions desperate to fall from her lips. She did not want to interrupt her sister when it was clear she had more to say.
“He has asked me to marry him.”
Amelia almost dropped her teacup. “What? When?”
“Very often, actually,” Harmonia replied, calmly. “He is quite determined, you see, although I have continued to refuse him.”
All of Amelia’s breath seemed to leave her body, horrified that the idea of her dear sister marrying such an indifferent, uncaring man.
“I know perhaps it is not the best of ideas, but I cannot find any enjoyment in going to balls and seeking a husband,” Harmonia continued, with a heavy sigh. “I have no pleasure in preening before eligible gentlemen, accepting various dances in the hope that perhaps one of them might come up to scratch.”
Amelia shook her head, firmly. “Come now, Harmonia, you cannot be serious! To enter into an engagement where there is no affection or even fondness between you cannot be a good thing.”
“You intend to.”
The words gave Amelia pause. “No,” she replied, softly, aware that she was going to have to make herself a little vulnerable in order to deter her sister from her chosen path. “No, I will not allow myself to enter into a union such as that. The man I choose to marry will have some kind of affection for me, and I for him. I am not demanding love by any means, but there has to be at least some kind of attachment between us.”
Harmonia looked a little surprised, as though she had expected Amelia to be entirely practical about the whole thing. “Then you think Lord Northfell might – ”
“I think nothing of Lord Northfell,” Amelia interrupted, waving the question away. “What I will say, however, is that I did feel something – something small, mind you – when we were dancing and, from his words and expression at times, I hoped he might feel something similar.” Frowning, Amelia wished that she could order her thoughts a little more coherently. “What I mean to say is, what happened with Lord Northfell last evening has convinced me that I could never enter into a marriage without there being some kind of affection. Something that could, one day, grow. I believe that to be a necessity.”
Amelia lifted her chin just a little, fixing Harmonia with her gaze. She was entirely serious, for, having considered the possibility of wedding a man without any kind of attraction between them, Amelia had thrown away the idea entirely. The small amount of attraction and of feeling she had experienced last night with Lord Northfell was enough to convince her that she needed to, at the very least, like the man she would marry.
“Promise me you will not accept Luke without considering it for a long while,” she said, firmly, seeing Harmonia’s frown. “And you must continue to discuss this with me, my dear sister. I cannot bear to allow you do this on your own.” Amelia did not like that Harmonia had been dealing with this on her own, for Luke could be somewhat aggressive when he had something he wanted. It was one of the reasons Amelia did not particularly care for him.
“I shall think about it, yes,” Harmonia sighed, looking more confused than ever. “However, you know that he is quite determined and, despite it all, I believe that I could easily be the wife he needs.” She gave a small, rueful laugh. “After all, if any of us is to be his bride, it would most likely be me – I am quiet and easily biddable after all.”
“Nonsense,” Amelia replied, firmly. “You are sweet natured and kind-hearted, which is why any man would be fortunate to call you his bride. I do not think that Luke is the right man for you, Harmonia, because he does not deserve such a gift as you would be.”
Harmonia’s expression softened. “You are very kind, Amelia,” she said, after a moment. “I know I must think on it, for I know father would agree in a moment if Luke were to ask him, but I promise I shall keep you informed as to what I am thinking.”
Amelia grew frustrated with the fact that she could not convince her sister otherwise, and rising from her chair, excused herself so that she might go and play the piano. Harmonia, evidently aware of Amelia’s dissatisfaction, smiled gently and waved her away, not taking offense in the least.
Once in the drawing room, Amelia tried to lose herself in the music, her fingers flowing over the keys, but she continued to make mistake after mistake. Her mind refused to settle, thinking on Harmonia, then on cousin Luke and, finally on Lord Northfell. Everything was so very confusing and Amelia felt in more of a whirl than ever.
Her sister simply could not marry Luke! There was nothing good she could say about Luke, nothing that she could see that would be good for Harmonia. A marriage to him would be a lifetime of unhappiness and pain. Harmonia was too kind and sweet-natured to marry a gentleman such as he, a man who thought himself better than all others. That being said, Amelia had to admit that she was surprised that cousin Luke had been pursuing Harmonia so ardently. Why was that? Did he truly care for her? Or did he see their prospective marriage as more of an alliance than anything else?
“Amelia?”
Looking up from the piano, Amelia rose as her father entered the room, glad that her whirling thoughts would be set aside for a time.
“Papa,” she smiled, taking his hands and pressing a light kiss to his cheek. “How good to see you this morning!”
He smiled and patted her hand. “I see you are awake, at least!”
“As is Harmonia,” Amelia replied. “She is still in the dining room, I think.”
“That is quite all right. It is you I came in search with.”
“Oh?” Amelia hoped that her father did not expect her to have found a suitable gentleman already, not wishing to discuss last evening’s events so soon after talking with Harmonia. Neither did she wish to discuss the gentlemen she had danced with for then she would be forced to talk about Lord Northfell.
Her father smiled. “I was hoping you might accompany me, Amelia. I have a visit to make this morning and I would appreciate your company.”
Amelia acquiesced at once. “Oh, of course, papa. Where is it you are going?”
“I must go and call on your dear mother’s brother, your uncle Geoffrey,” he replied, with a small sigh accompanying his words. “You know how overly cheerful he is and I confess that I find his exuberance a little tiring at times.”
Amelia chuckled, recalling just how different her mother had been from Geoffrey. It had been so strange to see them together in the same room, almost the exact opposite of one another. “Indeed, I do recall. Is he expecting you?”
“Yes, he is. I am quite sure he will not mind me bringing you for company. Can you be ready within the hour?”
“Of course, papa. I should go now and change my dress.”
“Wonderful,” her father smiled, as Amelia hurried towards the door. “You are always such a dutiful daughter, Amelia. I thank you.”
Chapter 5
“Good afternoon Amelia, my dear!” Uncle Geoffrey exclaimed, welcoming her in. “How good to see you. I was not expecting your company!”
There was a slight gleam in his eye that unsettled her, but, then again, Uncle Geoffrey had never particularly been a calming presence.
�
��Good afternoon, uncle,” she murmured, walking into his ornately decorated drawing room “And how are you this afternoon?”
She stopped short, suddenly aware of another gentleman rising to greet them, her skin prickling uncomfortably as she realized it was none other than Lord Northfell.
“Quite well, quite well,” her uncle blustered, walking ahead of Amelia and her father. “I was just spending a bit of time with Lord Northfell. Are you acquainted?”
Her father, on saying that he was not, was immediately introduced. Her uncle then proceeded to introduce Amelia, and Amelia, thinking it best not to say they had met before, simply curtsied.
“We are already acquainted, as it happens,” Lord Northfell stated, as Amelia rose from her curtsy. “We met last evening at Almacks.”
“Oh, how wonderful!” Uncle Geoffrey exclaimed, clapping his hands together. “Then I shall leave you both to your discuss whilst I speak to your father about a few things.”
Amelia glanced at her father, hoping that he would insist they all stay together to talk, but, much to her surprise, he wandered over to the other side of the room and sat down where Uncle Geoffrey indicated.
“A tea tray is on its way,” Uncle Geoffrey continued, waving Amelia to sit down. “You can pour the tea, can you not, Amelia?”
Amelia blinked, feeling as though she were out on a wild sea, being tossed and turned by the waves in whichever way they pleased. “Yes, yes of course, uncle,” she managed to reply, sitting down carefully opposite Lord Northfell.
“Capital!” Uncle Geoffrey boomed, and, with a quick grin, walked to the other side of the room and sat down opposite her father. They began to discuss things in quiet tones, ignoring Amelia and Lord Northfell entirely.
Lord Northfell cleared his throat, his eyes darting to her face. “Good afternoon, Lady Amelia. How nice to see you again.”