“Yes, my father just told me... He just apologized for everything.” He stood up and pulled her to her feet as well, then wrapped his arms around her. “Anjuli, I don’t know where to go from here.”
She just held on to him for several minutes, not saying a word. She had come out here to tell him where she stood, how she felt about him, what was happening with her—the position she was facing. But it wasn’t right. He didn’t need that. It was too much.
“I don’t know where to go from here either,” she admitted.
He pulled back to look at her, and the look in his eyes was so kind, so gentle, it warmed her from the inside out. She wasn’t expecting him to look like anything but the broken man he had just professed to be, but yet there was some light in him, shining, resilient and unwavering.
“Why don’t we figure it out together?” The question hung in the space between them for just a moment before he cupped her face in his hands and leaned in to brush his lips against her, soft and sweet.
She felt that surge of passion rip through her body, destroying the uncertainty she had felt only seconds before. How could she keep feeling this torn all the time? Torn between wanting him and feeling like she should walk away?
“Anjuli,” his voice came like a feather floating into her ear, “I love you.” He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her to his body. “I don’t know what I want to do or where to go, but I know that much. It feels like enough to build on right now.”
She backed away, her face awash with confusion.
“It’s taken me a while to realize it because I’ve never felt this way about anyone. You’re the one, angel. I’m completely miserable without you.”
Her throat closed off; she couldn’t breathe. His words were coming out too fast for her to process.
“What? What’s wrong?” he stammered.
“I...I just never expected you to say it.” Her confusion gave way to a smile. “I came out here expecting to pour out my heart to you and have you say you aren’t ready to love anyone. That you can’t.”
He took her hand into his. “Even if I wasn’t ready, the feeling is there, and it doesn’t give a shit what I want.” He laughed through the tears that were still glistening in his eyes.
“I was prepared for you to say goodbye, that we’re at such different places in life. I was going to tell you I’m pregnant, and you’d agree it would be best not to go down that path—”
His eyes bulged out of their sockets. “You’re what?”
Her hand was trembling as she swiped a stray hair out of her eyes. “I’m pregnant, Garrett. I didn’t want to believe it, but I’ve taken like ten tests, and they all say the same thing.”
The confused look tightened his features again. “I—so, wait, your daughter is pregnant, and you are too?”
She chuckled a dark laugh. “Yeah, great timing huh? I’m about to become a grandmother, so my body thinks it’s a good time to get real fucked up. I know, it’s so stupid. I’m way too old for that shit.”
“Well, you’re obviously not too old to get pregnant,” he shot back.
“Maybe not, but I’m too old to do this single parenthood thing again. I just served my eighteen-year sentence, and now I have to start all over again? I don’t think so. It’s ludicrous, really.” Her eyes glinted with a sardonic smile.
“But it’s my baby?” he questioned, still trying to work it all out in his mind.
She scoffed, “Yeah, of course it is.”
His furrowed brows loosened as a surprised smile tilted the corners of his lips. “Don’t I get a say in this?”
She exhaled a deep breath. “Garrett, I didn’t come here to put any pressure on you. And I’m certainly not trying to trap you or whatever. I just wanted you to know I was sorry for the way I acted, and, well, Jackson thought it was pretty important that I come out here, so I thought maybe something had gone wrong with your family. I thought I could help—”
“That’s because I told Jackson I’m in love with you,” he said, shaking his head. “You really don’t get it, do you?”
“Get what?”
“I want to be with you.” He lifted his hands to her shoulders and grabbed on to them, forcing her to look him in the eyes. “I want to be with you, Anjuli. I’ve never felt this way about anyone, ever. I just didn’t think you wanted to be with me.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to be with you, it’s just that—”
“What? I’m too young? You’re too old? Because I’m bi? What?”
“I love that you’re bi. But those other things, yes— and I’m going to be a grandmother. Why would you want to be tied down to a grandmother?”
He shook his head again, lowering his hands so they spanned her waist. “Anjuli, I don’t see a grandmother when I look at you at all.”
“What do you see?” Her whole body trembled, awaiting his answer.
“I see a beautiful, giving, caring, selfless, ridiculously smart woman I want to spend the rest of my life with,” he answered.
She reeled back in shock. “I just—”
“No, shhh, quit doing that. Quit discounting yourself. You. Are. Amazing. End of story.”
Her body felt like it had just been pushed out a plane without a parachute and she was in freefall, waiting for impact against the cold, hard ground. How could he really be in love with her? It didn’t make any sense. It was completely beyond reason.
“I’ve never met anyone like you,” he admitted, “no one who made me want to be a better person. No one who made me want to heal, to face my past. To have a family.
“I haven’t had a family since—well, ever, really. I spent my entire childhood wanting a family, a real family. I didn’t think I deserved one. But now here I am, and I have a dad, sister, brother and step-mother who all want me to be part of their lives...and I have you...”
He took her face into his hands again, then used his thumb to brush away the new tears forming in her eyes. “I have you...and a son or daughter of our own, if you’re willing to do it all over again. Only with help this time.”
“I don’t know what to say, Garrett... This is all so crazy!”
He pressed his lips against hers again. “Just say yes, that we can try. I want this, Anjuli. I want this more than I have ever wanted anything in my life.”
Her heart was swelling at his outpouring of love and devotion. She had never had a man say he wanted to be with her forever or have a family with her. She thought men only said those things in romance novels, or maybe to other women, women who weren’t her. How could this beautiful man with so much talent and so much potential—and yes, scars from a horrible childhood—want all that with her?
“Are you absolutely sure that’s what you want?” she pressed, studying his face for any signs of untruth. “You really want to have a baby? Be a father?”
He squeezed her body to his again. “I know it sounds crazy considering everything I’ve been through...but I want a chance to do it right.”
“Wait until my daughter hears her kid is getting an aunt or uncle younger than he or she is.” She laughed. “Talk about pure craziness.”
“Well, it may be a little crazy,” he suggested. “Doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing.” He took her into his arms and ravaged her lips with the most swoonworthy kiss she had ever received. And when he finally broke away, he asked, “So you’re in?”
She couldn’t suppress the smile growing across her face any longer. The tears on her cheeks were drying, and she was completely exhilarated by the future that had suddenly opened up to her.
“I have never met anyone like you either, Garrett Stone. I can tell you right now it’s not going to be easy.” Her radiant smile beamed up at him as he searched her face for her answer.
“I know it won’t be easy, but are you in? Do you love me?” His jungle green eyes pierced into her, looking as though every nerve in his body was hanging by a thread off a very steep cliff as he awaited a response.
“As much as I trie
d to fight it, as hard as I tried to convince myself our differences were insurmountable, I know—beyond a shadow of a doubt—I love you,” she proclaimed, taking his breath away with her beautiful testimony.
He took her into his arms again, his beard tickling her cheek as his mouth angled to whisper in her ear, “Nothing is insurmountable with love.”
Epilogue
Eight months later
“Well, he doesn’t have red hair.” Mishti laughed as she handed the bundled baby back to Garrett. “I guess I was kind of expecting him to.”
“Me too!” Anjuli laughed. “But I guess yours got the redhead genes from her daddy.” She glanced over at Jensen, who was holding her one-month-old granddaughter in his arms. “I don’t know where the Indian genes are in that baby.”
“So, does this baby have a name yet?” Mishti questioned, taking the baby from her husband. The little one stretched her arms as her mouth formed into an O shape, then she let out a giant wail that sounded impossibly loud for her tiny body. “Oh, I’m going to have to feed her soon. She does not like having to wait.”
“Huh, no idea where she gets that from.” Anjuli smiled up at her daughter, then returned her gaze to the father of her child, one very tall, bearded redhead who couldn’t be any more enamored with his son.
“So, a name,” Garrett said. “We wanted to wait and see what he looks like first.”
“Well, he’s a day old now,” Jensen observed. “So, what have you decided? Don’t you need to put a name on the birth certificate before you leave the hospital?”
“Well, Garrett wouldn’t allow me to name him Garrett Patrick Stone, Junior. He insisted there be some sort of nod to his Indian heritage...”
“Go on,” Mishti urged impatiently. “Geez, we told you guys our name before she was even born.”
“Garrett had come up with the name Flynn, you know, from Billy Flynn in Chicago, but we didn’t think Flynn Stone would be such a great choice.” Everyone laughed.
Before Mishti and Jensen could push the name issue any further, there was a knock on the door before a boisterous cheer came from Chase’s lips. He had a bouquet of flowers in one hand and the hand of a pretty young woman in his other. The pretty young woman happened to be Lilly Stone, Garrett’s sister.
After Chase and Trent broke up, Chase went out to Washington with Garrett and Anjuli to spend the holidays, and that was when a beautiful spark flourished between him and Lilly. The spark was so powerful, Lilly quit her job and moved to the DC area. Not only was she head over heels for Chase, but the idea of getting to be near her new nephew or niece was pretty compelling as well.
Chase was torn when Garrett moved in with Anjuli—happy his friend had found love with a beautiful and engaging woman, but sad to see their roommate relationship come to a close. They’d remained close, not only because of Lilly, but also because Chase’s agent saw Garrett perform in Chicago and offered him representation the next week. Since then, Garrett had done two cable TV roles and filmed three local commercials. It wasn’t his dream job, but he needed to go back to school to qualify for his dream job.
He had started classes toward a master’s in social work, which would enable him to work with PTSD survivors. His biggest interest lay in working with teenagers who had survived abuse. Anjuli was helping him with the coursework and encouraging him at every turn. Some days he wondered how he had decided to study Political Science and be a professor when his current pursuit was so much more in line with his talents and passions. And, fortunately, he’d been able to get his record from his prior grad school sealed so there was no way it could interfere with his future career.
Anjuli was taking an extended maternity leave from her position at the VA hospital. She wanted to stay home with their son for as long as possible, a luxury she could not afford when Mishti was young. She was also trying to talk Mishti and Jensen into transferring to one of the University of Maryland campuses so that she could watch her granddaughter while they attended classes. On the other hand, Jensen’s parents, who lived in Philadelphia, were clamoring to get the newlyweds to move closer to them. There was certainly an abundance of love for this baby, and Anjuli couldn’t be more delighted for her granddaughter to have the love and support of family that she and Mishti never had.
Garrett was grateful his father and stepmother were thrilled to take on the roles of grandparents, and Lilly and Jackson were equally excited to become an aunt and uncle, respectively. Mr. and Mrs. Stone and Jackson were counting down the days to Garrett and Anjuli’s wedding, which was planned for October on the anniversary of the day they crashed into each other at the liquor store.
What a whirlwind year it has been, Garrett thought as he glanced down into his son’s sweet, sleeping face. When he was fired from his position and kicked out of the PhD program, he thought his life was pretty much over. He was right about that. That life was over, his old life. What he didn’t know was that he had been flung out on a totally different highway, going in a totally different direction than before. It was the highway that would lead him to Anjuli, his father and siblings, Chase, his new career, and now, finally, his son.
The baby yawned, and his little eyes popped open. It was too early to tell what color they would be, but he sure did have a mess of wavy black hair on his head, just like pictures he’d seen of Mishti as a baby. He was sad that his grandparents in India had no idea about his existence. That’s their loss, he decided. Maybe at some point, Anjuli would reach out and tell them they had a grandson—not to mention a great-granddaughter—but he would leave that ball in her court.
All he knew was that for almost his entire life he had felt so empty and alone, but now his life was brimming with love and support. It was surreal. Yes, that word again. His son’s face scrunched up, and he began to wail his displeasure with his current situation of being without his mother, and more specifically, her breasts.
Garrett chuckled at how demanding he was already. He lifted the squirming bundle down into his mother’s waiting arms, giving her a kiss on the head. “I think he wants his mom.”
“It appears that way, doesn’t it?” Anjuli returned his smile with one of her own. “You might have to kick all these people out of the room unless they want to see me flop a boob out.”
Garrett’s eyes flashed over to Chase, whose brows were waggling with interest, just like he knew they would be. Then Chase cleared his throat. “Okay, I guess we can come back in a few. Can we get you guys anything?”
“You still haven’t told us the name!” Mishti complained. “Can’t you tell us that before you feed him? We’re dying here!”
Everyone laughed, but Anjuli shook her head. “You go nurse Jada, and I’ll do the same. Maybe Chase could get us some champagne? And we can have a toast when you all return, a toast to our new son. And we’ll reveal his name.”
“I’m so proud of you, baby,” Garrett said after everyone filed out of the room. He took her hand into his and squeezed it as the baby settled onto her breast and began to suckle.
“I still can’t believe we’re doing this,” she chuckled. “I mean, it’s kind of nuts.”
“I don’t think either of us has ever been much for doing things the traditional way.” He winked at her. “Why should this be any different?”
“And you’re sure about the name?” she asked. “I just want to be sure before we announce it. It’s usually a girl’s name, but—”
“Yes, I’m positive on the name. It’s perfect.”
“Are you sure you’re okay with him having two Indian names?”
“Yes, he still has my last name.” Garrett squeezed her hand again as if to emphasize it was his final answer on the issue.
“Okay, then.” She looked up at him with total adoration, then back to her son, whose little cheeks were rhythmically working to extract his dinner. “Navi Aarit Stone, it is.”
“Navi is perfect. He’s a little Navigator. And Aarit means ‘one who seeks the right direction,’” Garrett said. “I hope
he never loses his way.”
“He won’t,” Anjuli assured him, a smile shining radiantly in those eyes. “Not if we have anything to say about it.”
“I love you so much.” He bent to place a kiss on her cheek. “I’m so glad I found my way to you.”
THE END
Did you enjoy this book? Read the entire Mountains Trilogy, James and Sarah McAllister’s story. Learn more on my website: www.phoebe-alexander.com
Acknowledgments
I can’t write a book without taking time to thank those of you who made it possible. Writing may seem like a solitary endeavor, but I rely on a whole team of people to help make it happen.
First and foremost, to my husband, who has always believed in me, and who never fails to cheer me on.
Secondly, to my personal assistant, Jared, for his endless help with all the administrative and social media stuff I hate doing (like Twitter! LOL)
Thirdly, a special thank you to author Alice Rachel, who generously allowed me to write a version of her character, Chase Martinez, from her Under Ground series. I fell in love with Chase when I read her books, and I can’t recommend them highly enough. And thank you for all the fan-girling you’ve done over Garrett! You don’t know how much your encouragement helped me when it came to finishing this book! Go check out her books at http://www.alicerachelwrites.com/.
Finally, to my team, who helps me make my book pretty and get it in front of readers’ eyes. This includes my cover designer, Teresa Conner; my proofreader, Tina Kissinger; my beta readers Agathe and Jared; all of my Angels; and my blogger and promotional gurus including Colleen at Itsy Bitsy, Natasha at RRR Promotion/Read.Review.Repeat, Helene and Kristine at I Am a Book Hoarder, Shabby and Laura at BookBistro, Launa at Rae’s Reading Lounge, and Kim at The Curious Chapter. And also a thank you to so many more blogs who graciously and generously share my work!
Finally, to my readers, especially the members of Phoebe’s Angels, you are the real reason I do any of this. I am so blessed to have loyal readers who read my books, leave reviews, enter my giveaways, stalk my social media, and want to meet me at signings. It makes me feel like a total rock star! Thank you for all your support, and especially for buying my books and leaving reviews.
The Navigator (Mountains Series Book 5) Page 26
