by Kresley Cole
Cas's lips curved. Why have I never considered that before . . . ?
For the first time in his existence, he comprehended what peace felt like. Basking in it, he pressed a kiss to Mirceo's hair and inhaled his scent.
The staggering surprise of what ejaculating felt like had been nothing compared to the bond he shared with the vampire. Cas had accepted his ungodsly need for this male. Embraced it. Surrendered to it.
The hours they'd just indulged in each other had played out like a fever dream. Another two bouts in the bed and one in the shower had introduced Cas to fantasies he'd never known he'd had.
Now he relived snapshots of a night forever burned into his memory. His exquisite mate riding him, sucking blood from Cas's finger, taking his demon seed again . . . Mirceo spilling his own semen upon Cas's tongue . . . the prince bellowing into the pillow as Cas mounted him from behind.
Their shower together had been no less life-altering. Mirceo slipping behind him under the cascade, teasing him to distraction . . . Cas planting his palms on the tiled wall, offering his ass . . . Mirceo gripping his horns to drag Cas's head back--right as the vampire bottomed out . . .
Fangs piercing. Tile buckling under a demon's frenzied grip. Spontaneous cum lashing the wall . . .
This night--somehow both wicked and beautiful--had changed them forever.
Cas's lust was rekindling, but his young mate slept soundly. Mirceo obviously needed to rest. Hell, their separation for the last few days had taken its toll even on an older demon like Cas.
His lids grew heavier. But just as he drifted off, a stray question whispered through his consciousness.
Will the vampire be here when I open my eyes once more?
THIRTY
Mirceo woke with his claws digging into his own chest, a low whine ringing in his ears. His own?
Caspion slept beside him, spooning him securely in his brawny arms. Heaven. So why did Mirceo feel such anxiety?
No! Everything had gone perfectly last night. He'd gotten his dearest wish. When he'd fallen asleep against Caspion, he'd been secure in the knowledge that he and his mate were going to have a remarkable future together.
The low roil of panic he'd always experienced after sex hadn't disappeared; it'd escalated! His thoughts were in chaos. Maybe I want him too much.
Intense pain radiated in his left arm, just below the shoulder. He craned his head around but didn't see any bruising or injury. The rest of his body felt amazing.
So what the hell was wrong with him? Could a panic attack manifest itself as phantom pain in a limb?
He glanced back at Caspion's sleeping face, and a pang momentarily overrode his panic.
I . . . I . . .
Why couldn't Mirceo complete the thought? I . . .
Desire him? Not news. Want him for all time? Again, not news. Need him? Obviously.
Easing out of Caspion's embrace, he traced to his feet. As he dragged on his pants, Mirceo struggled to marshal his scattered thoughts. Maybe he truly hadn't been ready to promise his entire future. Had he made a deal with the devil to get what he wanted? And now that devil would collect on his soul?
But if he suffered from commitment doubts, then why was his heart telling him to stay close to Caspion? Shouldn't he be running away? And why hadn't he experienced anything like this during his other encounters with the demon?
Mirceo traced to one of the draped windows, peeking out. The orange hunter's moon hung low, setting over the grounds. The sun would soon rise.
As he stared, he felt as if he'd missed something he should have noticed--the feeling akin to that frustrating sense when a word is on the tip of one's tongue but can't be called forth. He began to pace beside the bed. What am I forgetting . . . ?
In time, Caspion stirred. The demon woke with a smile, blinking open those blue eyes. With his first look at Mirceo, his breathtaking smile faded. "Oh, for fuck's sake, vampire."
"What?"
He sat up, raking tousled blond hair off his forehead. "You know what. You've already checked out."
"I haven't said a word." Sweat beaded his forehead and upper lip. Mirceo didn't sweat unless he exerted himself during sex.
"You don't have to; your wild-eyed expression is saying everything."
Saying what? Explain it to me! Make me understand.
Caspion rose to snatch his clothes off the floor. "Knew this would happen."
Even now the sight of that physique had Mirceo hardening. What wouldn't I have promised to possess him? "What does my expression say?"
Caspion grated, "It's--been--swell." He stabbed his legs into his pants.
"You're putting words in my mouth."
"I knew you'd do this!" His instincts must be going crazy. Just as a demon would need to claim his fated one, he wouldn't tolerate losing a marked mate. Yet Caspion was clearly trying not to lose his temper. "I knew. But you convinced me to take a chance."
"Since we are mated, I thought I wouldn't feel this . . . this . . ."
"Regret?"
"Not regret." Mirceo examined his emotions. "I don't feel any regret."
"You never regretted your conquests. Just the mornings after. Damn you, I told you to take time. To be certain."
"I know."
"You promised me eternity, and you didn't even make it eight fucking hours! You told me things would be different with me, with your mate."
"It is different. My anxiety is stronger than it's ever been." Why am I provoking him?
"You prick." Caspion inhaled a deep breath, making another valiant attempt to control his rising anger. "Look, I understand this is a lot to process. What happened between us was mind-boggling. We're both emotionally raw and charged up right now. But we have something here. Don't throw it all away."
The calmer Caspion managed to remain, the more agitated Mirceo grew. "Throw it all away? Is that on the table?" Make this feeling stop!
"You want it to be?"
"No. No!"
"Last night spooked the hell out of me too, and I'm in a place in my life where this is perfect timing. For you, the timing couldn't be worse. But if you can trust me, we will make it work."
That pain in Mirceo's arm wouldn't let up. He scowled down at it.
"Are you even listening to me?" Caspion demanded. "What occurred between the time you fell asleep and the time you woke up?"
"That's what I'm trying to tell you: I don't know! Maybe . . . maybe I should go away for a couple of days and get my mind in order--"
"No. You made a decision; abide by it. If you leave here this morning, then you leave for good."
Leave for good. Leave Caspion. Mirceo's alarm ratcheted up even more.
The demon narrowed his eyes. "You dreamed a memory of mine, didn't you? I can guess which one." His face flushed, even as his eyes filled with bitterness.
Mirceo wanted to say, Your memories have nothing to do with what I'm experiencing. But that might be a lie. When he thought of how those demons had mistreated his young mate, his insanity only seemed to peak.
"No denial. So you have dreamed my memories. And you're saying they aren't affecting you?"
"They are. Just not the way you assume." Mirceo couldn't untangle his thoughts. This strangling sensation wouldn't relent. He pinched his temples, fearing he was about to pass out from lack of oxygen. "I-I haven't made any decisions or anything."
"That's worse! After last night, how could you decide on anything other than more?"
"Do you think I want to feel like this?" His emotions weren't just strangling Mirceo, they were breaking over him like a tsunami and crushing him. Drowning him. "What is this? Tell me!" Mirceo hadn't lost interest--just the opposite. He wanted this male even more desperately than before. "Help me, Caspion. Please. Because I think . . . I think I'm losing my mind."
"You're panicked because you don't want your hedonistic life to change." Caspion scrubbed a hand over his face. "I've no one to blame but myself. I'm an idiot for trusting you. I know your faults--and I saw thi
s coming."
That pissed Mirceo off. I never saw it coming. "That's not why I'm unraveling. You keep saying you know me, but maybe you don't." His head had begun to ache, a low throbbing over his brow.
"Bullshit!" Caspion pointed his forefinger at him. "I know you better than you know yourself."
The pain in Mirceo's head provoked his own anger. "You only think you do, demon. I have secrets."
"Such as?"
"The first night we met, I led you to believe we'd be nothing more than friends, but I was already plotting to fuck you."
"And now you have fucked me," Caspion said without shame.
Might as well do this now. "My friends wagered whether I could seduce the proud demon warrior--the conquest of all conquests."
"Friends? Those sycophants? We are friends, Mirceo. They are parasites. Is that the life you're in a hurry to get back to?"
"No!" Return to that superficial, dissolute world? Mirceo would rather live in that dismal cave with Caspion and fight Wendigos his whole life. So why am I losing my mind right now? "I just need to--to think about things for a time."
"You were supposed to think about things before we did this. What's done is done, vampire. And--as I warned you repeatedly--it can't be undone." His gaze rose to Mirceo's neck.
"Your mark." Mirceo's skin had healed, but demons would still be able to see it.
"You'll wear it forever. Does that panic you?"
"No, but something does." He felt as if he was about to vomit all the blood he'd taken last night.
_______
"An endless supply of new partners will grow stale in time," Cas said. In a few centuries, once Mirceo figured out how meaningless his existence was, the vampire would attempt to find his mate. But I'll be done. He could never get over Mirceo's infidelity. The jealousy would eat him alive. "You will wish for a life with me, and I won't take you back."
When Mirceo rubbed his chest, comprehension dawned for Cas. "There's nothing I can say to calm your thundering heart right now, is there?"
The vampire remained silent. His color was pasty, his face waxen.
Cas felt like he could hold Mirceo here, guilting him into staying. But if he doesn't want me . . . if he needs to flee so badly he looks sick . . . "So now you're done with me? On to the next conquest? I'll be the latest in a long line, one among all the ruined souls you left in your wake." Grief seeped into him. "Do you even care that the people you bed begin to dream?" Damn it, I began to dream of our future! "Just as I predicted, you've lost interest."
Mirceo paced, sweating even more. "I-I haven't lost interest in you."
Ah, so the greedy prince wanted Caspion--and others. Perhaps he'd always planned for that, carrying on the lifestyle they'd had before, but sharing a bed as well. "You mentioned secrets, leech. You might as well clear the air completely."
He shook his head hard. "Don't think that's a good idea."
Now Cas definitely had to hear whatever Mirceo concealed. He traced in front of him, prodding the vampire's chest. "Tell me."
Mirceo stumbled backward until he met the wall. "M-my thoughts aren't right." Agitation and confusion warred in his expression. He swallowed loudly. "We should talk later--"
"NOW."
Gaze darting, Mirceo blurted, "I paid those three nymphs to manipulate us into kissing."
"What???" That night had rerouted the course of Cas's entire life!
Mirceo's eyes widened, as if he'd never intended to say those words. He muttered a vile curse in Dacian.
"You set me up?" Cas's hand had been forced yet again by this devious vampire. Taking away my choice! His fists clenched. "You fucking child. You played with my life. With my mind."
"I-I did. I regret my actions, but I admit them."
"You're telling me this to force me to leave. Because you're too big of a coward to walk away! Guess what? It's working--"
"No!" Mirceo traced to the room's wastebasket. Dropping to his knees, he vomited blood.
Cas's first impulse was to care for his mate--which infuriated him even more. "Look at you! Your body's told us all we need to know."
Mirceo swiped his arm over his mouth, then rose unsteadily to his feet.
Resentment seethed inside Cas. He burned to share his new pain, to make the vampire feel a fraction of this agony. "Before I go, there's something you should know. I lied too, leech. You did have much to do with my stay on Poly. I suspected we had some tie, but I didn't want it. I didn't want you. I preferred to remain in that godsforsaken wasteland than be with you. Makes sense--my instincts were trying to protect me from a spoiled, degenerate princeling with no purpose, no resolve, and no fortitude."
Mirceo's expression grew stricken. Pressing his arm over his mouth, he fled, tracing away.
Cas gazed around the room, disbelieving he was alone. Then he threw back his head and roared.
THIRTY-ONE
As Mirceo paced the rooms in his clifftop villa, time seemed to move in fast-forward.
The sun set. Night fell. Dawn appeared, only to intensify into noon. Dusk tiptoed in with the nearly full moon.
All the while he questioned his actions, his sanity. The panic only grew, as did that sense that he was missing some huge detail that should be foremost in his mind. Yet now these feelings competed with anguish over the estrangement from his mate.
He kept gazing around, as if Caspion would trace into this room, a hero to be worshipped, to save Mirceo from his own wretchedness. From his stupidity. His weakness.
Within minutes of their fight, Mirceo had been tempted to trace to the bungalow, but he'd feared he would just prove the demon's points. You said I have no fortitude--behold! Resolve? Not here, lover.
He scowled at his arm when that pain flared again. Maybe Mirceo was just losing his mind. He raised his flask, attempting to sip a concoction that was more mead than blood.
Damn it, he didn't want others, didn't want to move on to the next conquest. He wanted to tease and conquer Caspion every day and night for the rest of their lives.
So why hadn't Mirceo told him that? Because I'm my own worst enemy. Caspion had known that about Mirceo. Why didn't I know it?
Hours had passed into days, but Mirceo had gotten no closer to deciphering his feelings. He needed Caspion to help him. The demon was a brilliant male. If they worked together, they could come up with a solution. Mirceo believed in Caspion--even if the reverse wasn't true.
Would the demon even take him back? A degenerate princeling . . . ?
Deciding to beseech Caspion's forgiveness and help, Mirceo traced to the bungalow. Please. I will try harder. I will do better. Don't give up on me.
Caspion wasn't there. So Mirceo waited.
And waited. In those maddening hours, he haunted his mate's home like a ghost.
Inhaling the demon's scent on a pillow.
Staring at the blankets Caspion had strung up over the windows.
Gazing out at the shore where the demon had risen like a god.
Mirceo brushed his fingertips over the holes in the wall, murmuring, "I've caused him so much pain."
Caspion's words kept ringing in his ears: You are your own worst enemy. . . .
_______
Two days had passed, but Caspion never returned.
Unable to remain still any longer, Mirceo traced to the Red Flag, heading to the bar.
"Have you seen Caspion?" he asked Leyak.
The demon frowned. "You look terrible, vampire. Bad breakup, huh?"
The barkeep hadn't been referencing a hunting partnership. "How could you tell we were together?"
"Looked like an invisible leash tied you two."
And then Mirceo had severed it. "Has he been in here?"
"Oh, aye. Looked worse than you do. Took a job in another dimension. A real dangerous one."
Nausea roiled. "I should be with him! Tell me where he is."
"Sorry, son. I can't do that. Caspion said you . . . played with him."
"Not intentionally! I didn't se
t out to hurt him. I acted like an idiot." He swiped his hand over his clammy face. "Please tell me where he is, Leyak. I can keep him safe. No one can protect him like I will. I need to be with my mate."
The demon shook his head. "I don't want you running after him, distracting him and getting him killed."
Maybe Mirceo should kidnap the barkeep and torture him for Caspion's location. Of course! But then he recalled his mate's memories of this demon. Leyak had always been kind and encouraging to Caspion, the first ever to take an interest in his wellbeing. You stalked that trail like a Caspion tiger, son!
Damn it! No torture, then.
Mirceo's gaze snapped to the wall. He remembered many of the posted jobs. Maybe he could determine which ones were missing.
The next-most-lucrative bounty was still in play. Below the painted image of a pretty, pointed-eared female were the details:
REWARD:
Wanted alive!
Name: Unknown
Species: Fey
Hair: Long, light brown
Eyes: One amber, one violet
Height: 5'4"
Reward: A queen's ransom in gold
Offered by King Abyssian Infernas, ruler of Pandemonia and All Hells
A few posters were conspicuously missing, and Mirceo recalled the details of them as best he could. He'd go to the location of each one. I will hunt the hunter. . . .
_______
A week had passed, and Mirceo was no closer to finding Caspion.
There were only so many more places he could be. Mirceo returned to the tavern, hoping the barkeep would take pity on him and reveal Caspion's whereabouts.
Leyak should pity him. Mirceo's clothes hung off his gaunt frame. His skin was deathly pale. Earlier, he'd forced himself to drink, but the blood hadn't made a dent in his deficit.
As he headed to the bar, Mirceo passed the bounty wall. Out of the corner of his eye, he spied a poster that made his head jerk around.
Cold fear snatched his heart. His never-ending panic morphed into a deafening roar that burst from his lungs. His invisible arm injury flared, his legs buckling. On his knees, he vomited blood all over the floor.
This. I sensed THIS.
Unable to process what was happening, he somehow managed to trace to Castle Dacia. Caspion, I need you! Gods, I need my mate. Inside the black-stone throne room, diamond-filtered sunlight beamed in through stained-glass windows. Upon a raised dais, Lothaire sat in his throne, Elizabeth close beside him in her own.
