“They’ve had it. Day in and day fucking out, I’ve been there. Even when I didn’t want to be, and even when I knew it was a waste of damn time. I’m doing the best that I can in a crappy situation and making sure that no one gets into trouble. Satisfied?” I realized that I was the only one raising my voice. I glared at Declan who merely arched a brow at me.
“Care to tell me what caused your little outburst?”
Not really, but maybe he was the perfect one to sound this off of. My head was spinning at the change of events lately, and my heart was in knots over Ali. I didn’t want to deal with Gentry or the damn gala. I wanted to spend time with her. We’d snuck off a couple of times to be alone, but it was never enough. If anything, it only served to frustrate me more.
I didn’t want stolen moments.
I didn’t want to have to wait until late at night when she could sneak away from her family.
Images of last night crept into my brain of how Ali had looked in the shower, up against the wall, as I’d made love to her. She’d been so quiet and reserved because she didn’t want her voice to echo too loudly that it had become my mission to make her scream.
And she did.
A small smile crept across my face at the memory.
“There,” Declan said abruptly, effectively bringing me out of my reverie. “That expression on your face right now? That goofy, sappy smile tells me that something else is going on with you that has you distracted.” He cursed under his breath. “What the hell is going on, Sebastian?”
I finished my beer and placed the empty bottle down on the coffee table. “Okay, fine. I met someone.”
“Okay. So?”
“She’s working the Gentry event.” Declan looked at me blandly, like he was unimpressed so far. “Her father used to work for my father and Ken Gentry. He got laid off about six years ago, and he’s pretty much been in a downward spiral ever since.”
Now he perked up. Sitting up straighter, he said, “Is she a threat? Is that what you’re afraid of? You don’t want to rat her out because you’re screwing her?”
I actually started to get out of my seat to go after him. “Do not ever speak about her that way,” I snarled. “It’s not like that. You got it?”
Disgusted with myself, I stopped myself and stalked across the room and grabbed another beer. Declan stayed where he was, and I could feel him watching me. Then, without a word, he stood up and crossed the room to help himself to a beer.
I felt like shit for nearly attacking him like that. I didn’t even know why I did. Or maybe I did, but I wasn’t ready to deal with it yet. At least he was not trying to retaliate or walking out, so I guess we were okay. I took my spot on the couch back and sat back and waited to see what he was going to do. He sat down beside me and an apology was on the tip of my tongue, but he stopped me.
“Okay, I think we’ve established that this is more than a pleasant distraction for you,” he began carefully. “And before you go trying to attack me again, I want you to think about this—are you sure that this woman is no threat to Gentry or this event?”
Leaning forward, I hung my head down. “First of all,” I began wearily, “her name is Ali. Secondly…I have no idea. I’ve caught her snooping around a bit, but I catch her every time.”
“Are you—?”
“Every. Time.” My tone was deadly, calm, and serious, and Declan didn’t question it again. “She wants some sort of retribution for what happened to her father, but she’s not a threat in the way that Ken or my father are suspecting. Ali may dig up some info to prove that the way her father and so many others were wrongfully terminated, but she’s not a violent threat, and she certainly isn’t the mastermind of some group who is.”
With a nod, Declan simply sat back, took a drink of his beer and waited.
“I’m stumped, man. I mean, I get what she’s doing, and I feel for her, I really do, and it has nothing to do with the attraction I have for her or the relationship that we’re building. I want to fix the problem for her, but there isn’t a damn thing I can do.”
“Isn’t there?”
I knew what he was thinking. I could very easily get the information that Ali was looking for and effectively put her Nancy Drew antics to an end. “That’s the problem,” I said. “I probably could do something, but at what cost?”
“Are you really worried about pissing your father off? Because last I checked, he was pretty much blackmailing you to make you fall in line.”
He had a point. It would make an interesting leveraging tool to get my father to back off, but it could also serve to enrage him more and put our company—the livelihood of myself, Declan, Levi and Cole—at stake. “I honestly don’t know anymore, Dec. The thought of putting the old man in his place and having something to hold over his head so that he has to listen to me is tempting, but…that just makes me no better than he is.”
“What does Ali want you to do?”
“I don’t know that either. She hasn’t asked for anything. She just confessed her whole plan to me the other day. and since then, I’ve done my best to not bring the subject up. I’m doing my best to keep her distracted so that maybe she’ll let the whole thing go.”
“Not likely. Not if her family means anything to her.”
“She doesn’t talk about them much, but I get the feeling that she’s had to be the primary breadwinner and caretaker since the shit hit the fan with her dad. I can’t even imagine how she’s held it all together. She’s young…too young for all of this responsibility to be dropped in her lap.”
“So what are you going to do?”
My expression was bleak—as was my hope. “Oddly enough, I’m torn. No matter how I feel about my family and the things that they do, they’re still my family. How much honor is there is destroying my own family?”
“I think ‘destroying’ is a bit dramatic, Seb,” Declan said reasonably. “But how much honor is there in protecting a crook?”
That was one of the great things about Declan. He didn’t pull any punches. “None.”
“Is this about honor, or is this about protecting Ali?”
I chuckled mirthlessly. “I thought they were one in the same.”
Declan finished his beer and slouched down beside me. “Now I see your problem.” He looked over at me. “And it’s a bitch.”
“You’re telling me? What am I supposed to do?”
“I wish I could tell you, man, I really do. But this is something that you need to work out for yourself. If it were me, I’d say screw it and stick it to the old man. But that’s just me. I’m a bastard that way. But you? You’ve got a heart.” He shook his head like the idea disgusted him. “You need to figure something out that you can live with.”
“I know you’re right. It just sucks.”
“I would imagine so.” We sat there in silence for several long minutes. “So this Ali…are you serious about her?”
I didn’t even have to think about it. “I am.”
“Is she serious about you?”
“I think she is.”
Declan nodded. “What is it that you want to do?”
“Honestly? I want to take away all of her hurt. I want to give her everything that she lost and make it all better.”
He cursed. “Good grief, it’s like listening to Levi.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“I just never thought that any of us were going to do this settling down thing. I pictured us all on the prowl together, having a good time and making up for lost time. Levi freaking went and got involved with Harper right away. I don’t begrudge him for that or anything, but I just thought that he’d get over it and move on.”
“I’m sure Gavin would have loved that,” I said, and the thought of Gavin caused that familiar kick to my chest.
Declan chuckled. “Well, if Gavin were here, I greatly doubt Levi would have gotten anywhere with Harper. No one would have had to know if he had a quick fling with her and moved on.”
“He loves her,” I said simply.
“Yeah, great. Sell it to Hallmark. It’s all bullshit to me.”
“I used to think so, too. Now? I’m not so sure.”
He cursed again. “You’re that serious with her? Already?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know where it’s going to go but…yeah. I’m that serious with her. I want what Harper and Levi have. I want to protect her.”
“And what about your family?”
That was the biggest fly in the ointment right now. I looked over at Declan. “Any chance of them simply disappearing and never being heard from again?”
“Fraid not, buddy. Why? Are you looking for volunteers to make that happen?”
“What? No. Hell, no. That’s not what I meant.” Much. “I just wish that they would perhaps butt out of my life and let me live it the way that I want to without their intruding on it. Ever.”
“Yeah, good luck with that.”
Luck? Hell, luck had nothing to do with it. Right now the only thing that could possibly help was a miracle. An honest-to-God miracle.
I knew we weren’t going to settle this right now. There were no simple solutions. But at least now Declan knew where I was coming from and where I was going to need help the most. He was a good friend. One of the best. It was a good feeling to know that he was here for me, that he had my back.
“Sorry about losing my temper before,” I said lamely.
“I could have totally taken you,” he said with a grin. “I just wanted to see how far you’d go.”
“Please, I had you totally over the barrel. There was no way for you to come back from that. I’m bigger and I’m stronger.” I enjoyed this game of one-upmanship that we had. It was a good tension-breaker when we were deployed. It seemed appropriate right now.
“I let you believe that. If you hadn’t gotten up when you had, you’d still be unconscious on the floor right now.” He stood and walked over to the mini fridge and helped himself to another beer. “Then I would have finished your beers, ordered myself the most expensive meal via room service, and perhaps booked myself a massage—and a dirty movie on the pay-per-view.”
“You’re a sick bastard,” I said with a laugh as I joined him for another beer.
“And don’t you forget it.”
Nine
Ali
I was on my way to give last-minute instructions to the landscaper when Sebastian appeared in the hall out of nowhere and pulled me into a small sitting room off the ballroom.
I was so surprised I couldn’t do anything but gape up at his handsome, laughing face. He was standing next to the closed door, but he turned us around so I was pressed up against it.
Then he pressed up against me.
Now, just so it’s clear, I have absolutely no objections to Sebastian kissing me. In fact, I’d been having trouble not thinking about it with a giddy thrill for the last two weeks, even when I should have been focusing on my job or on finding out information on Gentry and Maxwell Industries. But I’d been focused on the landscaping and was not at all expecting a big man to materialize in front of me and pull me into a private room for a kiss, so my response was delayed.
When he leaned down into my lips, I still didn’t do anything except clutch at his shirt and stare up at him with my mouth parted.
He paused just before he reached my lips, frowning slightly. “You don’t seem particularly enthusiastic.”
His familiar, slightly aggrieved tone broke through my stupor. I giggled.
He straightened up, his frown deepening. His hands still rested at my waist. “And now you’re laughing at me?”
I shook with amusement, wrapping my arms around his neck. “You surprised me. It’s hard to make a sudden shift from trimming hedges to kissing in a closet.”
“We’re not in a closet.” He glanced around the little room, which featured nothing more than two ornate benches, a princess chair, a gilded mirror, and heavy drapes. “I’m not even sure what this room is for.”
“It’s an anteroom, or something—for people to rest or freshen up during a ball.”
He shook his head in amused skepticism. “Plus, I have no trouble shifting gears to kissing you, no matter what I’ve been doing.”
I smiled up at him fondly, wondering how it was possible that he’d dropped into my life like this—so amazing, so kind, so sweet and funny. And, by all evidence, crazy about me. I still couldn’t wrap my mind around it.
He was as different from his family as day was from night, and I must have been crazy not to realize it right away.
He slid his hands down until both of them were cupping my bottom. “Have you appropriately shifted gears to kissing me yet?”
I sighed rather sappily and pressed up against his chest. “Yes. I think I’ve fully shifted gears now.”
He leaned down again, and this time he claimed my lips. Warm emotion and sensation clouded my head as his mouth and lips teased mined until the kiss deepened.
Then, I reluctantly pulled away.
Sebastian frowned again. “We’d only just gotten started.”
“I know. But I really don’t want to get turned on in the middle of the day like that, since we can’t do anything about it.”
“Who says?” He glanced around. “We could probably make good use of that bench.” He rubbed his groin against my middle, evidently to give me a preview of coming attractions.
“I’m not going to make love to you where anyone could catch us.” My voice was light because his tone was teasing. He obviously wasn’t putting any real pressure on me, something I really appreciated.
“We can lock the doors.” He twitched his eyebrows at me. “I can be very fast.”
I broke into soft giggles again. “That does sweeten the pot, but I think I’ll forgo the pleasure. I really do need to talk to the landscapers before they go too crazy with the shears.”
He pulled back slightly, responding to my words, but his smile, if anything, got more affectionate. “I love to watch you at work.”
Despite the way we’d just been kissing, the words made me blush. “What do you mean?”
“I mean you’re amazing to watch. You never draw attention to yourself, but you get so much done. You’ve made this whole gala happen, and I bet no one will even know all you’ve done.”
Something deeper than amusement warmed in my chest. I glanced down. “I didn’t do it all. I just handle the details. Cheryl planned it all.”
“No, she didn’t. Maybe she gave you some direction, but you’ve made the whole thing happen behind the scenes. And I think it’s amazing that you’re so sweet and so selfless that you don’t even care whether you get all the applause for it.”
I felt pleased and embarrassed and like I might melt into the floor. I’d never had anyone seem to see me the way he did. Know me. Appreciate me. Want me. Not the way Sebastian did. “I’m not really selfless.”
“You’re more selfless than me.” He tilted his head down and kissed me again, but very gently this time. “I want what I want. And, I’ve got to say—I really want you.”
I tightened my arms around him and murmured against his mouth, “I want you too.”
I meant it so much more than physically, and I was sure he did too. As miraculous as it seemed, it felt like I just knew. Sebastian Maxwell was the man for me.
After a minute, he pulled away with a sigh. “Can I see you tonight?”
I nodded. “I’ll head over to your hotel, but it will be kind of late. I need to have dinner with my family tonight and spend some time with Rosie. I feel like I haven’t spent much time with her lately.”
“How is she doing?”
Since he sounded like he really wanted to know, I said, “I don’t know. She’s really quiet. That’s not a problem. I was quiet too. But it feels like she’s withdrawing even from me, and it worries me sometimes. High school can be really hard.”
“Was it hard for you?” He played idly with my ponytail, sliding his hand down the length of it.<
br />
I gave a half-shrug. “It was okay at first. I had a few good friends, and a few guys asked me out. But after everything happened with my dad, it just…”
His brows drew together. “I can’t believe the kids would have rejected you just because your dad lost his job.”
“No. They didn’t. It’s just that things were so hard at home that I had to…I didn’t have a lot of time for a social life. So it was mostly just classes and home for me.”
“It seems like it’s been like that for you for a long time. Work and home.”
“Yeah. But sometimes that’s what it needs to be. My family is really important to me.”
“I know it is. I love that about you.” He lifted a hand to cup his cheek. “But you seem to think about it as a duty rather than a relationship. You’re part of the family, right? You’re not just the servant and worker bee.”
The first thing I felt was defensiveness, mostly because the words struck me as so true. But I didn’t react to the feeling, other than stiffening my spine, and the first response quickly passed. “Yeah.”
He leaned down to kiss me one more time very briefly. “Just a thought. As you know, I’m no expert on families, so I have very little to offer on that topic.”
“I think you have a lot to offer,” I said, smiling at him through a blaze of deep feeling.
He gazed down at me for a moment. Then shook his head briefly and straightened up. “Sweetheart, you have to stop looking at me that way, or I won’t be blamed if I just grab you and carry you away to a bedroom right now.”
I laughed again and slipped out of his arms. “That will have to wait until tonight. I’ll be over by ten at the latest.”
“I can’t wait.”
I couldn’t wait either.
***
So, for the last two weeks, I’d kept up my search for evidence of what happened to my dad.
Searching for incriminating evidence hadn’t gotten any easier. Since the one time I’d gotten onto Gentry’s computer, I’d never found it left logged on again. I kept checking the home office, though, whenever I could discreetly sneak in and look around.
Honor Bound Page 10
