I swallowed the lump in my throat. My girl was confused, sad, and suffering. And she was doing it all alone.
“Why did they have a party here in Toronto?”
“Sarah and Ronald and his father wanted it. They made all the arrangements—Alex came to town a couple of days ago and she’s only here until the wedding. The plan was for them to marry here where their families are, and then go back to Calgary. I’m not sure you noticed, but no one from her life, aside from me was there tonight. It was all for them.”
I snorted. “All about image.”
“Just like the fancy wedding,” Emma agreed. “Alex has never wanted one, but that’s what’s happening.”
I shook my head, gritting my teeth. “There isn’t going to be a fucking wedding, trust me. And she isn’t going anywhere.”
Alan grinned. “You got a plan?”
“When is this supposed wedding taking place?”
“Three weeks from now,” Emma replied.
I frowned. I didn’t have much time. But I had to make it work.
“Okay. And she is staying here until then?”
“Yes.”
“I assume at her parents’ condo, since they sold her apartment?”
“Yes.”
I sat down. “How was she after I left tonight—was she okay? Did seeing me do anything?”
Emma shook her head. “She was upset—she tried to hide it, but I could see it. She was very quiet, and I heard her tell Bradley she had a terrible headache. He took her home early. But after you left…”
“What? What happened?”
“She kept looking around. She’d walk around the room, not talking to people, just walking. I think maybe…”
“…she was looking for me.” I finished for her.
“I think so.”
“I know she was. We’ve always had an intense connection. If I was close, she always needed me touching her. Holding her hand or sitting near her.” I slammed my hand down on the table in anger, hitting it so hard the glasses shook. “She fucking needs me, Emma. She needs me as much as I need her—even more.”
“What are you going to do? Can I help?” She clasped my hand. “Let me help. I believed Sarah and I shouldn’t have—I should have known better. I want to make it up. Please.”
I studied her honest expression. We’d been deceived. Sarah removed us from Ally’s life. It was time to change that.
“Are you in town for a few days?” I asked.
“Yes. I’ll be back and forth until the wedding. Alan leaves in the morning.”
“Then I think you’re going to meet her for a walk tomorrow.”
She tilted her head. “Will I be showing up for this walk?”
I paused, pursing my lips. “Maybe I need to run into you while you’re out for your walk. You could get called away. Ally might be more comfortable if she sees you know me.”
“Okay, that works. But if she’s upset…”
“I’ll ease off. I don’t want to cause her any pain. I’ll try again the next day. And the day after if I have to.”
“Be sure to stay clear of Sarah. That woman is capable of more than we realized.”
“I know, and I intend to.”
“Be gentle with her, Adam. Alex is very fragile.”
“I will. But today is the last day she’s ever going to be without me again. She belongs with me.”
Emma squeezed my hand. “Yes, she does.”
“I made too many mistakes. I should have told Sean I wasn’t going. I should never have left without her—then I should have stayed and fought. I should have given the PI company more time. My head said she left here because of me, even when my heart said she would never leave me the way she did. I let Sarah fuck with my head when she taunted me. Every time I thought I was doing the right thing, it was wrong. It was all fucking wrong.” I shook my head. “But not this time. Help me get my girl back, Emma.” My voice caught. “I need her.”
“She needs you, too.”
Deep down, I already knew that.
Chapter 20
I waited anxiously in the park where I’d arranged to “bump into” Emma and Ally. Although it was only a couple of blocks away from Sarah and Ronald’s place, I knew we’d be safe there. Ally told me once Sarah didn’t like to walk anywhere, so she’d never go for a stroll. Limos were her choice of transportation. Bradley had returned to Calgary this morning, so we were safe.
The day was overcast, and the park deserted. I prayed the rain stayed away long enough that I could pull this off. My camera hung around my neck as a prop once again—an excuse to be in the park. I paced the path up and down, too tense to sit. When I heard the murmur of voices, I ducked behind the trees. Emma and Ally came into view. My breath caught at the sight of her. She was beyond tiny—far too thin in my opinion—which gave her the air of being fragile. Her steps were slow, the slight limp evident. Her hair was loose today, cut shorter, barely brushing her shoulders. She looked weary as she spoke with Emma, the two of them walking arm in arm.
She was still the most beautiful woman I had ever seen, though. They sat down on the bench and I slipped farther into the trees, coming out onto the path around the bend. I took in a deep breath and paused, aiming my camera blindly at the tree line.
“Adam?”
Show time.
I lowered my camera and turned with a surprised expression. “Hey, Emma.”
She came over, giving me a hug. “What are you doing here?”
I held up the camera. “Just taking some shots. I like the muted light today.” Glancing over, I saw Ally watching us, her brow furrowed.
I smiled, trying to keep it polite and easy. “Hello, Alex.” I swallowed as I spoke, the name sounding so wrong when I said it. “How nice to see you again.” I extended my hand. She hesitated, then placed her palm in my hand.
“Hello,” she murmured, her eyes showing her uncertainty.
My fingers closed around hers, my heart soaring at the contact, then skipping a beat when I realized she was wearing the earrings I had sent her. “You look lovely today.” I paused, drinking in the sight of her, trying not to appear too anxious. “Your earrings are very pretty.”
Instantly, color flooded her cheeks and it took everything in me not to stroke the soft skin. I had missed her blush.
She withdrew her hand, touching her ear and lowering her eyes. “Thank you. They’re my favorite pair. I’m not sure where I got them, but I love them.”
Her favorite pair. I liked that. Even if she didn’t know I gave them to her, they still meant something to her. It was a start.
Emma made a frustrated sound and pulled her phone out of her pocket. “Excuse me, I have to take this.” She walked away, muttering into the phone. I hid my grin, knowing it was Alan on the line as we had arranged.
I indicated the bench. “May I sit?”
“Oh yes, please do.”
I tried not to let her formality bother me. I tilted my head in Emma’s direction. “Business, no doubt.”
“You know Emma well?”
“Well enough.”
She crossed her legs, her pants riding up. On her ankle was my band. My determination grew. “Nice anklet.”
“Thank you.”
She hesitated. “I’m sorry, have we met before? My mind is a little fuzzy these days.” She leaned closer, her voice lowering. “I hit my head and sometimes I forget things.”
She was near enough I could smell her familiar floral scent. I gave her a gentle smile. “I’m sorry to hear that. Yes, we’ve met—several times.”
She frowned, chewing on her lip again. “I don’t remember, I’m sorry.”
I wanted to yank her in my arms and tell her exactly how close we were. But I forced myself to remain calm. “That’s all right. We can get to know each other again, like old friends, catching up.”
“Is that what we were—friends?”
“Yes, we were friends. Good friends, I think.”
Emma came back. “I’m sorr
y, Alex. I have something I have to take care of. Do you need me to walk with you back to the apartment?”
Before she could answer I interrupted. “Actually, I was going to invite you for coffee. But maybe Alex and I can still go—get reacquainted. I’ll walk her home afterward.” I looked over at Ally. “If that’s okay with you?”
I breathed out a sigh of relief when she nodded. “Yes, that’s fine, Adam. Emma, call me later?”
Emma bent down and hugged Ally. “For sure.” She shot me a glance. “Nice to see you, Adam. I hope to see you again soon.”
I winked. “Count on it.”
Emma headed out of the park and we walked to the coffee shop in silence. Ally sat at a table, while I grabbed our coffees. I slid a latte to her, since she always loved one when we went out. She took a sip and frowned.
“You don’t like it?”
“It’s perfect. How did you know how I took it?”
“I know you.”
She shut her eyes and rubbed her temple.
“Do you have a headache, Ally?” I asked, her name slipping out before I could stop it.
“No.” She shook her head. “Why do you call me that?”
I took a sip of my coffee. I wanted to hold her and tell her I called her that because she was mine. Because I gave her that name so she’d know she was special to me. Instead, I shrugged. “I always have.”
“No one else does.”
“No, I gave you that name.” I met her gaze directly. “I also called you Nightingale.”
Her eyes widened and a small spark of something passed through them. “Because I used to be a nurse?”
“Yes.” Now it was my turn to frown. “Used to be?”
She shook her head, twisting the engagement ring around on her finger. I studied it briefly, hating it, not only because it wasn’t my ring, but because it didn’t suit her at all. Large and showy, it was far too big for her delicate finger. It was a statement, not a token of love.
“My fiancé is a doctor. I used to work here at Toronto General.”
I tamped down my anger at her use of the word fiancé. “I know. That’s where I met you.”
Her gaze flew around the shop, her nervousness evident. “Do, you, ah, know Bradley? Is that how we met?”
“Not as well as I know you, and no. I had an accident and you were my nurse. We became friends after that.”
Her voice grew upset. “I’m sorry. I can’t remember that.”
Without thinking, I clasped her hand in mine. “It’s okay. Don’t worry about it. Maybe one day you will.”
She relaxed, leaving her hand in mine. I stroked my thumb over her skin gently.
“Can you tell me something about our friendship?”
I sucked in a fast breath, knowing I would have to tread carefully. “We were close. You liked to come for rides on my motorcycle, and we’d have picnics.”
Her eyes widened. “Really? On a motorcycle?”
“You loved it.”
“What else?” she asked eagerly.
“You helped me make my place homier. It was pretty sparse when I met you. You”—I stumbled over my words—“you helped make it a home, Ally.”
“I like it when you call me Ally,” she whispered.
I smiled and lifted her hand, dropping a kiss on the smooth surface. “Good.”
She pulled her hand away and picked up her latte.
But there was a small smile on her face. Was there a chance my words stirred something in her?
When she was ready to go, I walked her back to the building her parents lived in. As we approached it, I was desperate. Our time was coming to an end and I didn’t want to leave her. Yet, I had to make sure Sarah and Ronald didn’t know I was back.
I kept the conversation light and easy, wanting her to be comfortable with me. It seemed to work, the tension easing from her shoulders as we chatted. Unfortunately, it had the opposite effect on me, and I was anxious. Especially now that we would be separated. I glanced around, making sure we weren’t seen, and stopped a couple of buildings away. “I need to leave you here.”
“Why?”
I decided to be honest. “Your mother doesn’t like me. She wouldn’t approve of us having coffee together.” I brushed a stray curl back from her forehead, my fingers lingering, using the time to feel the silkiness of her hair. “Bradley doesn’t like me much, either. You might not want to mention we saw each other.”
I knew if they found out she’d disappear. I’d find her again, but I didn’t want to take the chance.
“Oh. They didn’t like you…before?”
“No.”
“Oh,” she repeated.
“We used to meet away from them.” I sucked in a deep lungful of air. “Often with Elena.”
Her eyes widened. “You knew Elena?” she breathed.
“Very well. I adored her.” I sighed, and spoke in a tender voice. “She loved you very much.”
Tears filled her eyes and her lips started to quiver. “I miss her.”
“I do, too.”
“I don’t remember her dying, I just know she’s gone.”
One lone tear dripped down her cheek, and I couldn’t stop myself. Stepping forward, I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her to my chest. She melted into me with a small sob, and for the first time since the night at the airport months ago, I held my girl. I breathed her in, feeling that intense satisfaction I got only when I was close to her.
I let her cry, holding and rocking her. It was only for a minute, but it was exactly what I needed. The way she clung to me, I knew she still needed me. Her love for me was still in there somewhere. I had to find the key to let it out.
When she drew back, I wiped the tears away with my thumb.
“Will you go for a walk with me again tomorrow?”
She didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
This time my smile couldn’t be contained. It was wide and joyful and grew bigger when she returned it. For one brief second, my Ally was in front of me.
“I have to go.”
I stepped back, fighting the urge to kiss her. To beg her to remember me. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Meet me in the coffee shop around ten?”
She nodded and began to walk away, then turned back. “Adam?”
“Yes?”
“I won’t tell them. I don’t know why they don’t like you, but I do. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“I like you, too, Ally.”
Then she was gone.
—
I was tense all night, worried something would happen. That she would slip up, and her mother would find out I was back in town. I had spoken with Sean, who informed me that, yes, he had received a few calls regarding my whereabouts—one especially sticking out in his mind since it was a man and he asked a lot of questions. He told me he did exactly as I instructed, stating I was no longer employed there and had left the country indefinitely. While I regretted not leaving him Emma’s name in case she called, it also told me this was a joint effort. I had a feeling the man who called was Bradley—he would have wanted assurances I was out of the picture. If my being gone meant they relaxed enough to bring Ally back here, then I could still do this.
She wasn’t lost to me yet.
I was waiting in the coffee shop when she walked in the next morning. She looked a little better and offered me a sad smile as she sat down. “I can’t stay long, I’m afraid. My mother has things she needs me to do for the wedding.”
I nodded, knowing I had to tread carefully. “You can make it up to me tomorrow.”
She didn’t say no.
“You look more rested today.”
“I slept better last night,” she confessed. “I haven’t been sleeping well since we arrived. I keep feeling like…”
“Like?”
“Like I’m missing something. Silly, isn’t it?” She took a sip of her coffee. “I don’t know why I feel like that. I can’t put my finger on it.”
I shook my head, hope growing inside me.
“Not silly at all. I’m sure you have lots to remember.”
She sighed. “My mother and Bradley tell me I know all the important things and to let the rest go. To move forward with my life.”
I tightened my hand on my coffee cup. I bet they fucking did.
“You should do what is right for you, Ally. Not them.”
She blinked at my words, but didn’t say anything.
I showed her some pictures I had taken of her and Elena. I taught her how to go forward on the screen and sat back, watching as she looked at the photos. When she frowned, and her fingers flew to her head, I sat forward. I already knew that meant something was upsetting her and causing her pain. “What’s wrong?”
She held up the camera to show me. It was a picture I’d taken of her and me—the camera turned toward us, held out at arm’s length. Her head was nestled into my neck, a warm smile lighting her eyes. I was nuzzling her hair with the silliest grin on my face. We had just made love and I grabbed the camera to capture the look of pleasure she was wearing.
“What is this?”
“We were goofing around.”
She studied the picture for a minute and then handed me back my camera, looking down at the table. Her hand once again began to massage her temples and I lifted the camera, calling her name quietly. When she glanced up, I kept my finger pressed, letting the camera take shot after shot until the frown left her face and she smiled. “What are you doing?”
“Goofing around again.”
She shook her head, still smiling. “Stop it.”
I grinned. “Yes, ma’am.”
—
Every day I could, I saw her. Coffee. A walk. I talked her into lunch one day and took her to the pizza place she liked so much—where I taught her how to really eat pizza. I hated watching her eat with utensils again, but at least I got her to eat more than one piece. She looked around more than once frowning, but I didn’t push her.
Some days she was shy and tentative. Other days her smile was easier. I tried pressing a little more each day. I would drop a hint or a memory and see what happened. It always hit me like a fist to the gut when there wasn’t a flicker of recognition when I spoke. Other times there was the smallest of sparks. Often what followed were her fingers pressed to her head. I always knew when to stop, since I hated seeing her in pain. But I had to keep pushing. I had too much to lose otherwise.
My Image of You Page 22
