by Bijou Hunter
“Ooh, you should write a book,” Justice says, “I really think ‘Playing Chicken: A Crazy Person’s Guide to Second Chance Romance’ has a nice ring to it.”
“I’d read that,” Jared says, walking by without stopping.
“I’d skim to the good parts for sure,” Justice adds
Nodding, I mutter, “I’d totally download it and then never get around to reading it.”
Zeb looks at Coretta. “Do you listen to anything they say?”
“It’s all noise most days.”
“Well, just for that, don’t expect any gifts for your baby shower,” Justice says, walking away.
“Are you banged up, Peepaw?” I ask, speaking slowly in case he really does have a little brain damage.
“Naw, the car didn’t do shit to me.”
“Were you liquored up when you got hit because I heard that’ll help keep you loosey-goosey.”
“Shut up, girl.”
“No, I don’t see that happening, but you keep trying to make a difference in the world.”
Zeb once again waves off my comment and then frowns at his approaching daughter.
“The thug is living here?” Zeb asks.
Coretta shakes her head. “Bet he can’t afford to pay his rent. Damn deadbeat.”
“For your information,” I say with my hands on my hips, “Jared moved in for sexual reasons. Mom is at an age where she’s constantly horny. It’s science, dammit, and she needs to get laid. Fortunately, Jared’s penis works without the help of pills, and he doesn’t mind her constant needs.”
Journey laughs when her father pokes his head into the room. He rolls his eyes and returns to hiding from the in-laws.
“They’re getting married again, you know?” Justice says, suddenly appearing next to me. “They want to make their sordid love affair official.”
“I won’t come to the wedding,” Zeb says.
“I’ll come,” Coretta replies immediately. “I like weddings.”
“Jezebel,” Zeb growls.
“Shut up before I run you down again.”
“You don’t have the balls.”
“I don’t need balls to take you down, old man.”
“This kind of love is what I dream for one day,” I tell Journey, who rolls her eyes. “Hey, Peepaw, you’re a moonshiner, right?”
Zeb’s frown darkens immediately. “Who you asking for?”
“Me. I was gonna buy some of your stash for me and Emmett, but if you’re too sensitive about your illegal craft, I’ll ask another redneck. This town is full of them.”
“Hush your jabbering. I got what you need. I thought you might be working for the law.”
Glancing back at Journey, I find her laughing wildly again. I swear she’s been sipping some moonshine herself. Why else would she be so giggly lately?
“I’m having a picnic,” I tell Zeb. “I need enough moonshine for Emmett and me.”
“Emmett is your thug.”
“Yes, I own him. So does your moonshine taste like gasoline?”
“Naw, girl, it’s the best you’ll ever have.”
“That’s not really saying much, but how much for two bottles?”
“I sell them in jars,” Zeb says, and Coretta snorts.
They give each other the evil eye, and I wonder if they’ll fight or fuck next.
“Give the girl the stuff for free,” Coretta tells him.
“I don’t believe in free.”
“She’s your granddaughter.”
“Are we sure about that?”
“She looks just like Christine.”
“Are we sure Christine is mine?”
My mother immediately frowns ugly at her father whose rudeness melts under her disappointment.
“Fine, I’ll send you two jars for free but don’t think you can take advantage of me.”
“I’ll keep that in mind, Peepaw.”
“And stop calling me that.”
“Okay, Peepaw.”
Zeb flips me off, but I’m already following Journey out the back door to where I assume she’ll feed me and allow me to play with her little guy. The only thing that would make my home life better is Emmett sleeping in my bed rather than me sleeping in his.
40 Train Wrecks - Poppy
Slick Rock River isn’t far from our property and runs along a popular fishing area. Today, though, no one is around when Emmett and I arrive. I spread out a purple butterfly covered blanket for our picnic. In a basket, I have a few sandwiches, chips, and two containers of Peepaw’s non-toxic moonshine.
“Zeb calls this flavor the Love Machine,” I tell Emmett who relaxes shirtless on the blanket.
Crawling next to Emmett, I cuddle against his hard body. His fingers quickly caress my cheek.
“I’ve never enjoyed moonshine,” he murmurs, kicking off his boots. “Are you sure it won’t kill our brains?”
“Oh, we’ll lose a few brain cells. Since neither of us was going to cure cancer, it won’t be a big loss.”
Emmett laughs while rolling me over and kissing my cheeks. “You’re better than my fantasies, and I had some seriously wild fucking fantasies about you, baby. You managed to improve on two long years of wicked thoughts.”
“You’re better than I imagined too,” I moan when his fingers graze my nipple. “You’re both sweeter and a bigger jerk. Complicated is the best kind of man.”
Emmett pinches my nipple through my shirt while his lips suck at mine. I push away his hand and wiggle free.
“No sex in public,” I mutter. “People could see and take videos and put them on the internet.”
“I’d just kill them.”
“Once something’s online, it’s there forever.”
Emmett sits up and reaches for the basket. “I’m hungry. Are you hungry?”
“Do you think getting me liquored up on that blackberry moonshine will mean I’ll take off my panties?”
“Of course not,” he says, clearly lying.
“I got drunk on beer once, and it didn’t do anything except for make me sleepy.”
“Then you have nothing to worry about.”
Emmett sets out the food on napkins and hands me the jar of moonshine. Taking the drink, I almost pity the poor bastard for thinking he’ll get any outdoor loving tonight. I know me and liquor, and there’s nothing sexy about the mix.
An hour later, I’m swaying to a Kid Rock head banging song like it’s some kind of hippy anthem. Emmett sits on the blanket, clapping to the beat of a song we’re not listening to.
“Ooh, look at the frog,” I say, still swaying even after another fast rock song comes on my phone. “He’s flirting with me.”
Emmett pulls out his gun and points at the green amphibian. “Don’t go making moves on my woman.”
The frog doesn’t flinch while Emmett steadies his aim. Forced to save the innocent yet gross thing, I plop down on my man’s lap and lick his lips.
“Pay attention to me.”
Wearing a goofy, alcohol influenced grin, Emmett rests the gun in the basket and wraps his arms around me.
“You smell so good,” Emmett says, kissing my neck.
“It’s the bug repellent.”
Smiling, he wraps me tighter against his hard body. “You smell like my woman. No other woman smells as good as you. Or tastes as good. Or fucks as good.”
“I believe only two out of three of those statements.”
“I love you, Poppy Adams. I’m the only man that’ll love you right. I’m it and this is it. Do you understand?”
“Why do you love me?”
“You’re perfect. So fucking hot and I love your tits. Have I told you that before?”
“Yes, baby.”
“Your nipples don’t get hard unless I work for it,” he says, pulling back my shirt and gazing at my bare breasts. “They make me put in the effort. They’re like you, and I love you, and I love them.”
“I love your nipples too, but maybe less so, but still a lot.”
Emmett cups my face and stares into my eyes. “It’s not just your beauty and your tits. I love the inside of you too. I love your big mouth and how you say what you feel. Too many women I grew up with were sneaky. They lied just to lie because it’s fun for them, but you’re real. The first time we met, I acted like a pig, and you were fearless and said what you wanted to say. That’s when I knew you were special.”
“I knew you were special too because you were hot and I normally think men are stinky, but I didn’t even notice your smell. I was too young to know why you were special, but I knew something was special.”
“You’re so fucking smart.”
“You’re so fucking drunk.”
“Yeah, but not the way you mean. I know you are fucking brilliant. Even if all of this,” he says, running his fingers over my face, “was messed up like by acid…”
“Acid?” I balk. “How the hell would acid get on my face?”
“Like some asshole you pissed off threw it on you or something.”
Sighing, I whisper, “So the suspect list would be in the hundreds.”
“If you weren't this beautiful,” he says, caressing my lips, “I'd still love you. You’d still be Poppy, and I’ll love you even if you’re dead. No one could replace you. I’d die if you died because I’d be a fucking mess and someone would get the drop on me because I wouldn’t see them coming through my fucking tears. I’d fucking die without you.”
“Is this where I’m supposed to say something similar because I don’t know if I can make that kind of commitment? Dying is too hardcore, and I’m a little afraid I’d end up in hell.”
“You’re an angel.”
“Eh, not so much, but you’re sweet for lying.”
“I’ll never love anyone else.”
“I’ll never so much as look at another man. Fucking would obviously never happen since I only put up with your giant dick because it’s attached to you.”
“Don’t you like the fucking?”
“While we’re doing it, sure. Later when walking off my tender hooch, not so much. I do love how exquisite your face looks when you come. It’s as if you’re seeing heaven.”
“You’re my chance to see it.”
“We’re going to get old together. All wrinkly and senile.”
“I’ll get hairy.”
“I plan to stop shaving my legs when I turn thirty.”
“I stopped shaving them years ago.”
Laughing, I suck at his bottom lip and grind my hips against his. “Our kids will be huge, and we’ll teach them to terrify people.”
“We’ll be good parents and teach them to be nice to dweebs and old people.”
“Umm… some old people need terrifying. My grandparents are awful people and kinda deserve someone messing with them.”
“Okay, then just dweebs.”
“We’ll have a good life together, right?”
Emmett’s drunken expression sobers a little. “We’re a perfect match. Nothing will keep us apart.”
“Like my mom is with Jared.”
“Yeah, but I’ll never let you run away. I’ll chase you and chase you and chase you until you trip over something and then I’ll catch you and bring you back.”
Leaning back, I laugh at the idea of him literally chasing me through fields and over hills like an unstoppable horror movie monster. Emmett doesn’t get why I’m laughing, but he’s too busy teasing my left nipple to ask questions.
“I won’t chase you,” I murmur, enjoying how his fingers roll my hard nipples under my shirt. “If you try to run, I’ll flash my tits and stun you long enough to tie you up and keep you with me.”
“Baby, I want you to flash me now.”
I glance around to remind myself we’re alone in the woods. Or at least no one is close enough to get a good video shot. Reassured, I pull off my tank top, exposing myself for Emmett’s greedy fingers.
I stand up and wrap myself with a towel before wiggling out of my shorts and panties. Lowering myself over where Emmett’s freed his thick and rather threatening cock, I prepare to be drilled by the best.
Emmett’s lips devour my throat, leaving a Rorschach test of hickeys I’ll likely wear for a week. I moan at the way his cock teases my clit. Once I lift my pussy over his erection, Emmett guides his monster inside me. His lips latch onto my right nipple, teasing the hard flesh and seducing my vagina to relax for the ride.
“Poppy,” he moans once my pussy’s sliding up and down his cock. “You’re perfect, and I love you.”
“I love you too, and I will never deny you,” I moan into his ear while bouncing on his cock. “Except for that one week a month when I don’t want you bugging me at all.”
“Anything you want, baby.”
“I’ll keep things fresh for you. I’ll dress up and role play and let you tie me up and spank me. Not hard, of course. I don’t like pain or discomfort or feeling annoyed, but I’ll try weird shit with you, I promise.”
“You’re mine in every way.”
“Yes, and I love you so much. More than anyone, but there’s one thing I can never give you,” I say, cupping his face. “No butt stuff. Never. Even if my vagina disappears and you have no other hole options, my butt remains off-limits.”
“Oh, baby, I know. With my size, I’d tear you the fuck up. Like you’d need to go to the hospital to get stitches or gauze up there or something.”
“Hush, Emmett, before my vagina joins my butt on strike,” I say, covering his mouth with my hand and then my lips.
Moving faster, I don’t think I can come out here surrounded by nature. Besides, my moonshine-addled mind is distracted by stupid crap like how heavy my hair feels and why I never became a physicist.
Emmett lets out a redneck roar when he comes, declaring his love for me to the frogs and any spying pervs. I keep bouncing on his dick, long after it’s past pointless, but I’m too busy wondering what to name our future kids. I’m leaning toward the moniker Dandy if it’s a boy, when Emmett rolls me onto my back and rests next to me.
“I need to make you come now.”
“No, please don’t. I’m not in the mood. I just want to enjoy our love and plan for the day Dandy joins our family.”
“Who’s Dandy?”
I wrap the towel tighter and smile at Emmett. “In my heart, you’re already my husband.”
“Then marry me right here under the moon,” Emmett says, waving his hand up at the sky. “Wait, it’s nighttime already?”
Laughing, I slap at a mosquito. “Will you, Emmett Gene Mercer, take me, Pauline ‘Poppy Awesome’ Adams to be your lawful wife, to love and worship from this day forward, for better, and for worse, even when I’m poor and sick until death do us part?”
“A million times over, I fucking do,” he says, standing and yanking on his pants. He pulls me to my feet and into his arms. “Do you promise to put up with my shit and my winking and all the mistakes I’ll make because you know I love you and will do everything I can in my power to make you the happiest woman in the world?”
“Yes, I do.”
“Then I declare us husband and wife.”
“You may tongue the bride.”
Emmett gives me a kiss while lifting me off the ground. He swings me around, and I imagine my Disney Princess beach towel is a wedding gown. A few birds fly into the night, and I think of them as doves like the ones I saw in a movie that one time when Mom was going through her short-lived rom-com phase.
Everything is magical because of our powerful love… and the two jars of Peepaw’s Love Machine.
41 Train Wrecks - Poppy
Emmett and I stumble back to my house sometime after midnight. Thankfully, Mom and Jared are in bed, so I don’t have to pretend to be sober when I’m fairly certain my crawling would give me away.
Though I’m too tired to undress before climbing in bed, Emmett has no trouble stripping himself naked. Crawling next to me, he murmurs about killing the frog in the morning, so I need to remember what it lo
oked like. I laugh at the thought of him hunting a frog, and that’s all I remember until waking to the sounds of Otto and Felix fighting over the remote.
“Those boys are so stupid,” I mumble, rolling half off the bed before Emmett saves me from taking a header to the floor.
“Your house is loud.”
“Family is loud.”
“Yeah,” he says with a smile and then returns to sleep.
I sit up and brush the hair away from Emmett’s closed eyes. The handsome bastard is all mine. My head still swims from the moonshine, but I’ve never been happier. Later, I’ll likely crash with a massive hangover. Until then, I want to share my good news with whoever is lucky enough to be in the house right now.
Otto and Felix have made a truce by giving Matilda the remote. Now they’re both sweet-talking her into picking their show choice. The kids ignore me when I shuffle into the kitchen where Mom drinks coffee.
“You came in late,” she says without looking up from her Kindle.
“Where are Journey and Justice?”
“They’re doing laundry.”
“Can’t their men do the laundry during the week?”
“Poppy, I don’t butt into my children’s relationships.”
Mom and I share a long gaze. I know she’s making a point, but I’m still pretty out of it. Eventually, I smile.
“You’re so beautiful,” I say, rubbing her head. “Like an angel.”
“Are you drunk?”
Before I can answer, I hear my sisters’ voices approaching. Journey enters the house first with Ike resting on her hip. He wants down as soon as he sees Otto. Toddling over to his brother leaves Journey free to bug me. Justice shuffles in a minute later, looking tired.
“I puked last night,” she tells me. “I don’t think it was hormones, but I still hated every moment of it. How do women vomit every day and not go insane?”
“How would I know?”
Justice pours a cup of coffee for Journey and herself before sitting at the kitchen table with Mom.
“I have an announcement.”
“Oh boy,” Journey mutters behind her cup.
“I don’t want any beloved sisters to writhe with jealousy at knowing I’ve found my one and only when I was eighteen while they took many, many long lonely years to find theirs, but I’m married so suck it, ladies.”
