by Grace Reagal
He slips a finger past my underwear and my eyes flash. My heart beats fast enough that I feel it in my throat. “Do you want me to continue?”
I nod without thinking. I’m on a high that I never want to come off of. I can clearly see his jaw tick. His other hand comes up and weaves his hand into my hair. He presses his lips against mine, and I’m surprised that it’s softer than before. I’m quick to open up, which surprises me.
I feel his hand in my pants. I don’t know what’s happening, and neither does my body, but I can feel that it’s good. It feels so good. How can something that feels so good come from someone that’s a monster?
His hand moves quickly and something in me builds up. Heat pools in the pit of my stomach and everything in me flutters. I try to come up for air. “Please…what are you…ahhhh…”
I can feel a smug grin against my lips, as he leans in for another kiss. But for once, I’m not angry at his smugness. I don’t care. Our breaths mingle and I feel like we’re one and the same.
What is happening to my body?
Surely this can’t be real.
It feels too electric and too perfect and too good.
There’s a buildup in my body, coming from whatever he’s doing below. His hands are obviously extremely skilled because he knows exactly what he’s doing. He breathes into me, “Your body bends under my hands, Kitten.” He sounds extremely pleased by that fact.
“No…I…”
He freezes all his movement. I feel his lips on my collarbone. He blows on my skin, but withdraws, almost reluctantly. “Do you want me to stop?”
What comes out of my mouth is a whimper. “No, please.”
The buildup has reached its peak. I feel like I am about to explode. I writhe against his body, trying to mimic the motion of his hands, but it does nothing.
His hand grips my face and forces me to look at him. I blink up at him, my eyelashes lifting slowly to meet his stormy green eyes who say more than his mouth ever could. “Say my name, Kitten.”
I arch my back, my hands digging into his shoulder. “Please…”
I am so close. To what, I do not know, but it is something. Something I know will shatter my whole body. I’m not sure if I can survive it, but I am pulled to it like it is the only way I will survive. “Please…can you…ahh…” But his hand has stopped and the pleasure is quickly fading away.
His voice, rich and deep, reverberates through my body. “Say my name.”
“Valentin, Valentin, Valentin…” I feel like I have said it a thousand times.
I feel his chuckle on my neck, his voice laced with what I think is desire and lust. He uses whatever magic he has in his hand and I reach a high on the cliff of pleasure. My toes curl and my whole body braces itself for what is to come. Valentin groans from my nails that dig into his shoulders.
My body tingles, and blood pumps through me. My body arches back and my eyes shut in uncontrollable pleasure, awaiting the release that I know only Valentin Nikolaev can give me right at this moment.
I have no idea who the hell I am right now and I don’t give a fuck. I just want what his hands promised.
Chapter 18
Caterina
“Please…”
I’m right at the edge, so close to whatever is going to come next.
I know I’m acting nothing like myself and I don’t know when this part of me came out. I know that Rational Caterina would be ashamed of what I am saying and how I’m acting, but I don’t have any control over my body.
He isn’t letting me have any control.
I know the pumping in my blood isn’t leaving until it gets what it wants. What “it” is, I’m not sure yet, but from the way my body is bracing itself, I know it is going to be incredible and mind-blowing.
***
Valentin
I watch her body bend and melt under my hands. Her legs grip my waist. Her hands intertwine behind my neck, her fingers scrape my back. Her back is arched, her shirt rising above her stomach. Her lips are parted in an O, oxygen having left her body.
I know what I am supposed to do today. I know the plan. My mind knows what to do.
Manipulate her mind against her body. Leave her gasping, unsatisfied, and confused.
But she looks so fucking vulnerable, her face smooth of the scowl she usually wears around me. She has no idea how incredible she looks right now. It doesn’t affect me much because I have seen it countless times on other girls, but to regular guys…they would come in their pants just with that look.
Not you though. Right, Valentin?
My hand that isn’t in her panties tightens, my fingers gripping her waist.
I am supposed to pull away now. I am supposed to push her off and walk calmly out of the room.
It isn’t supposed to get this far.
She isn’t supposed to affect me.
And in a lot of ways she doesn’t. I’ve seen women with better bodies. Cassandra has longer hair, silky to touch and better to wind my hand around. It’s easy to twist and pull her head front and back when she sucks my cock.
But Kitten is a different being all together. It pains me how innocent she seems and yet has everything to do with her father.
“Her father’s mafia is her mafia.”
Anger grips my body like it always does when I think about Dominic Giovanni.
Startled by my stillness and my pause to think, Kitten looks down at me. Her eyes are dazed with desire and lust. Her fingers on my back are gripping so tight I know they will leave bruises in the morning.
And suddenly that anger dissipates. It is the most unnerving thing I have ever experienced. Usually, her attitude and her words make me angrier, but the innocence she is radiating rids me of every normal emotion.
I start to lose my usual control over myself. My cock tightens beneath my jeans, the pain of knowing I can’t have her now pumps through my blood.
“Valentin…?” Her voice is husky and low, hesitant. She blinks slowly, her wide grey eyes watching me with sensuality.
Something in me breaks. The innocence in her voice, the trust she has put in my hands becomes too much for my control. I will deal with the consequences later.
I move my hand faster against her before I can tell myself no. She tips her head back, biting her lip hard, trying to keep the moan in. If we were in bed, I would tell her to scream.
I hate girls who keep their pleasure unknown.
But now, I just want to do this as fast as can. Get away from her, her body, and her fucking smell.
My eyes can’t rip themselves away from her as she climaxes, though. She is something else.
Her echo of ecstasy breaks through the grip she has with her throat and lips, filling the room with her husky voice.
Her fingers dig into my back, making me smile. The pain feels incredible when it is from her. Her legs grip my waist hard, unintentionally squeezing my cock through my pants. I had planned on waiting until the climax wore off before I push her off, but she is making it fucking hard.
I quickly get up before I do something else I’ll regret, and she slips off my lap. I grab her arm before she falls on the floor and I lean her against the chair.
“Easy there.” My words are filled with the lust that I have been trying to hide from myself.
She is coming to her senses, because I can see her eyes flickering over the room, trying to clear the aftermath of what had just happened to her body.
I pull on my jacket and started walking away. I can’t look back. Not now. Not when she looks like…
I slam the door behind me.
I lean against the wall, my hands fisting beside me. I shut my eyes, trying to wash her voice, her words, her face, her skin away.
Fuck.
How did she end up manipulating me when it’s supposed to be the other way around?
I hear voices at the end of the hallway. When I look up, I see Ms. Jenning, along with a couple of students behind her.
I look toward the door, and for a
flash of a second, I consider giving Kitten a warning. But suddenly, the lust fades away and I grin. This will be the redemption for myself, for breaking my promise.
I start walking away.
“Yo, Valentin!”
I nod to the guys. Ms. Jenning beams up at me. “Be good, Mr. Nikolaev.”
She has something for me, I know.
Maybe I can fuck her and get an A for the semester.
I grin. “‘Course, Ms. Jenning. But I think someone is making some trouble in your room. I heard something in there.”
***
Caterina
I am shaking.
I am literally shaking.
Crying.
I am crying.
Why? I don’t know why. I don’t think it is bad. Whatever Valentin had done to my body had felt good. It had felt…too good. I realize how ridiculous it is to be crying because something felt good. But my body wasn’t ready for something like that.
I try to get up, but my knees are shaky. I quickly wipe my tears away, angry at myself for crying.
Then I become mortified, as it really sinks in what had just happened.
I cover my face with my hands. “Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. What have I just done?”
I had let him…
My eyes shut, I start muttering quickly to myself, my voice wavering. My heart beat still hasn’t slowed down.
“Caterina Giovanni, you just let a guy put his hands in your pants.” I hit my mouth with my fist trying to keep the emotions from exploding out of me.
And there is also the issue of the wetness I feel in my pants. I don’t even want to begin considering what it could be.
I start gathering my things, muttering, “Pants, Cat! You let him put his freaking hands in your pants, and you let him—you let him—oh, God why did you let him—”
“Excuse me! What are you doing in my classroom?”
My eyes fly up. The teacher flips on the lights and I cover my eyes, having gotten used to the shadows. There are students behind her, all staring at me. I hear laughter.
“Your pants are unzipped, sexy!”
There are bursts of laughter from the student’s comment and I feel them ogling.
“I think her panties are polka dotted, man.”
I look down mortified and find that yes, yes my pants are unzipped. I quickly pull my shirt down and put on my coat, scrambling to get out.
The teacher, still in the middle of the room, has her arms crossed. She looks at me sternly, and she starts speaking. I see her lips, sparking with shiny pink lipstick, moving. But I can’t hear anything. My whole body is on fire and my ears have gone silent.
I practically run out of the room. Catcalls follow me all the way down the hallway and I’m panting, sweating, and crying by the time I stumble into the bathroom.
When I look in the mirror, I look like a tornado has gone through me. My hair is a mess, tears fall down my cheeks, my clothes wrinkled, and my jacket buttoned wrongly.
Nothing about this is good.
***
In Psychology, Tom immediately sees that something is wrong. “Cat?”
I cover my face with my notebook and whisper, “Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to talk. I want to die.”
“What?”
“Nothing. Nothing.” I grip the notebook in my hand, for once not able to focus on the words. “Just leave it.”
“No!” Tom gently but firmly pulls down the notebook and sets it down in front of me. His eyes flicker to the teacher who is explaining a concept to a student on the other side of the classroom. He looks back at me. “You are not okay.” He wipes his black curls from his face and leans in. His brown eyes look at me worriedly. “What’s wrong, Caterina?”
His voice is so soft and concerned that I want to break down and tell him everything. “Everything. Everything is wrong.” I stare down at the table, trying to burn a hole in it. “The dance on Friday was disappointing, Mell was a drunk, I got Chase hurt, my weekend didn’t go much better, I forgot my psychology homework, then today Valentin…” I gulp.
“Valentin what?” Tom’s voice turns hard. “What did he do?”
I look up at him, surprised. Usually, Tom is timid when he talks about Valentin, always warning me to stay away.
Now he looks…he looks angry. I can’t help but smile a little. He looks confused. “What?”
I chuckle, glad to have something to focus on. “You just,” I shrugged, “I dunno, you’re always so ‘Valentin my lord’ and ‘let’s bow down to Valentin’. Now you look…angry?”
He pushes his glasses up and leans forward on his desk. He rubs his neck. “He’s really being a dick to you. Usually…”
“What?”
“Usually he messes with girls for a couple of days and moves on.” Tom cocks his head, playing with his pen in his hand. “What does he want from you?”
I shrug, my mood down again. “I have no idea.”
Was I sure about that?
Tom sighs, patting my back. “I’m sorry, Cat. Just hold on. There were toys before you and there’ll be toys after.”
“That doesn’t make me feel better.”
“I’m just saying, Valentin never sticks around for long. He’ll find new prey soon.”
“You think so?”
“I know so.”
There is a strange tone in his voice. But he doesn’t offer much more and I’m not going to intrude.
I finally flip the psychology book to the correct page. My mind has cleared enough to work. “Thank you, Tom.”
“For what?”
“For being a good friend.”
“Yeah. No problem. You’re not too bad yourself. Maybe we can study for the test next week?”
My eyes turn up to him, nervous. “After school?”
He pushes his glasses up, starting to copy something down. “I mean, if you want. I’m not forcing you or anything, but just like if you want and if you…” He trails off muttering.
“I would love to, but I, I can’t. I have…” Darn it! I can’t come up with a good excuse.
I can see his neck get red, as he waves me off. “No, no, I get it.”
“Tom—”
“No, really, it’s fine. I was just asking. You’re probably really busy.”
I sigh and fall back into my seat. I feel horrible, but there is nothing to say.
The thing is…I’m not busy.
I have nothing to do, other than homework. Mom and Dad are probably at work since they left to go back once they had dropped me off.
But as much I like Tom, I have only known him for a short while. If he finds out who I am, I don’t know what he would do with the information.
Who knows? Maybe he would blackmail me too.
***
AP Seminar rolls around right after lunch. Mell isn’t at school today so I sit alone in the back corner where I make sure I can’t be found by a soul.
A couple of people have come up to me and told me Chase is looking for me.
I am trying to avoid him and everyone.
I don’t know how to start saying sorry and I suck at apologies because I usually end up rambling.
I drop into my seat, feeling empty without Tom next to me. Even though he doesn’t speak as much as everyone in this school, I really like his presence. It is comforting and warm. He had come in before me, but he is sitting in his regular seat. He doesn’t even look at me.
By the time class starts, the monster is still not there. My heart fills with joy. Maybe he has left for the day.
Maybe he died.
It scares me at how much relief I feel at that thought.
Caterina, you’re a death-wisher.
Mr. Mahor takes attendance and starts passing out worksheets. Suddenly, the door bursts open, revealing a much-alive, still-arrogant, Nikolaev. He swaggers toward the seat next to me, not even giving the reason for his tardiness. Not that Mr. Mahor asks, which I find angering.
A worksheet reaches me, but it’s sud
denly plucked from my hands.
I can feel him standing behind me. “What’s this?”
I turn around in my seat, my fingernails pressed against my palm, hard enough to make my hands bleed. I look up at him, and say calmly, “You know what I was just thinking before you came in? That you died.”
Chapter 19
Caterina
Outrage is what I am expecting. Some sort of anger. Some sign that what I said affected him.
Instead, Valentin starts laughing. He pats me on the head. “Aw, Kitty. You’re so cute when you’re angry.”
I brush off his hand angrily. “I just told you I wish you died and you’re—you—you—” My face twists in confusion.
He lifts an eyebrow. “I’m what?”
Why isn’t he even the slightest bit affected? Usually, he would be all King Kong, pow pow, no one freakin’ disrespect me!
I open my mouth and shut it. I turn completely around. He is so darn exasperating. My head is spinning just being around him and his strange attitude and everything that comes along with Valentin Nikolaev. “I hate you.”
I feel him take the seat beside me. I refuse to acknowledge him. He leans forward and says into my ear with a grin, “That’s not what you were saying this morning.” I can hear the sexual stuff that drips from his voice.
My voice shakes with anger as I say, “You did something to me! That was not me!”
I can feel Valentin shake with laughter beside me while I try to find a way to die. “What did I do to you, Kitten? Do you think I drugged you?” His voice is taunting.
“Maybe!”
Honestly, who knows? He is a creep and someone with really bad anger issues.
His laughter slowly dies off as he continues watching me. I can feel his eyes burning into the side of my face. I refuse to acknowledge him.
I refuse to even think about what had happened this morning. That girl had not been me. He had manipulated me. He is a freak!
