by Lara Swann
I sigh and lean into him, wrapping my arm around his waist and walking in step together until the uneven terrain has us bouncing off each other, and we reluctantly give each other enough space that we’re just holding hands. He brings mine to his lips though, and kisses it in the same gesture he’s done for years now.
“I love you, Hanna.” He says. “I really do.”
My heart skips a beat, the way it’s never stopped doing all this time. Every time I look at him, it always feels…just like this. Little butterflies and anticipation and heat.
Which doesn’t mean it’s always been easy or that I haven’t wanted to throw things at him from time to time. But, so far, I’ve refrained - and according to my Mom, you can judge how solid a relationship is by the number of times you’ve wanted to throw something and haven’t. I’m not entirely sure what I think of her relationship advice, and I certainly know my Dad had some questions about that, but…if that’s the case, I think Derek and I are doing pretty well.
And we’ve had more to navigate than most.
But it’s still there - the crazy-intense passion that I spent at least a year waiting suspiciously for it to disappear, the way it has with everyone else. If anything, it’s only grown stronger. I want him more now than I ever did in the beginning, and my heart starts to beat fast when he just looks at me. It’s totally ridiculous, but also helplessly true.
“I love you too.” I respond, smiling faintly. “But that doesn’t mean you’re off the hook if we don’t get back to the cabin by midnight.”
“It’s not even midday yet!” He objects, then pulls me in for a kiss.
I act like I’m going to resist, and let him take it anyway - his hands hot on my neck and his tongue tangling with mine until I sink against him, every nerve on fire. All over again.
“I missed you.” I say, softly, into his mouth. “A lot.”
“I missed you too.” His eyes sparkle back at me. “Hopefully we’ll fix that over the next year or so, huh?”
“Hey.” I poke him. “No-stress vacation, remember? I said I’m not talking about that until I’ve had at least a month to recover from my exams.”
“Hanna, you did great.” He says, exasperated, and tugs me back to walking along the path. “You were the least stressed of anyone else anyway - you’d started preparing months in advance, knew all the possible questions and answers…it can’t have been that hard for you.”
“I don’t know.” I say innocently. “I was still expecting you to come out of nowhere and beat me.”
He groans. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”
“Nope.” I say, grinning.
I found out a little while into our dating experiment that the only way he’d managed to top me on that paper was to actually bribe the professor. I’d been outraged enough that I hadn’t spoken to him for at least a day.
But eventually he won me over with arguments that no, it hadn’t distorted the whole system - it was just a bribe to announce it, not to actually give him the mark - and without it, I never would have come with him, and none of this would have happened and…and life would be very different. I was still remarkably unimpressed - with my favorite professor as well as him.
Then he pointed out that he’d effectively bribed me too, and that made the indignity a little harder to maintain.
“How was Aldora?” I ask. “I have missed it, you know.”
I squeeze his hand, and he gives me a small smile before starting to talk about what he got up to this time around.
Over the last two years, he’s spent most of his time in America, studying at Boston even though I guess he doesn’t really need the degree. But he’s also taken a few weeks from every semester to fly back to Aldora and keep up with everything that’s going on there.
And, as much as I miss him when he’s gone…I’m really pleased that he does. It’s something he never would have done before, but things in Aldora are…slowly changing. And he says he feels like he’s finally found a place there. A few years ago, he was avoiding being there at any cost because all it meant was going along with tedious discussions and meetings that he clashed with, playing the obedient son while disagreeing with everything his father was doing.
Now, he goes back because he’s working with Nicolas on one scheme or another. They’re slowly trying to change a few things, and it’s a purpose that he agrees with for the first time ever. The country is cautiously opening itself to a little more foreign interest, and both Nicolas and Derek have found - to their surprise - that he’s desperately needed to ease relations with foreign officials who most of the rest of the royal family have a habit of unwittingly offending.
Of course, they keep saying I would do an even better job, actually being foreign myself - but the idea makes me light-headed. I have absolutely never wanted to be a politician and it’s hard enough when I visit Aldora to make sure I ingratiate myself with the court. I’m definitely not spending my life doing it with an entirely different set of egotistical, judgmental assholes.
Not that I quite phrased it that way to Nicolas when he approached me with the idea.
…I might have phrased it that way to Derek later, but he just laughed.
Besides, Derek is the charming one - and I love seeing him in that role. He has a knack for taking uncertain, dubious officials and having them eating out of his palm only a few hours later. The only thing holding Aldora back from being truly open is that change takes time, and they have to be careful.
The King has withdrawn a lot from actively ruling the country - he was already handing a lot of it over to Nicolas, and now that Nicolas has Derek to support him, he can take on more. I’m sure it doesn’t help that Nicolas is now subtly disagreeing with some of his stances more and more - and while what’s happening might not be quite what he’d choose, he does at least respect that it’s Nicolas place to take over from him and lead the country forward. So long as they don’t go too fast, anyway.
So far, we’ve split the summer together between Aldora and America, but with the few odd weeks I’m in America for longer or he stays in Aldora, and mostly it works. I was slightly terrified the first time I went back, but the welcome I received instantly put me at ease. Adele demanded yet again that I marry Derek, but at least this time I could honestly answer that it was probably both of our intentions…eventually.
Nicolas was as good as his word, and the court has backed off entirely - I’m their Princesca-attenciano, their Princess-in-waiting, but this time, they’re waiting for me. And for the last two years, that’s what’s been comfortable - for all of us.
Now…with my graduation around the corner and that European trip with Carly planned for shortly afterward…well, now life gets interesting.
I still don’t know exactly what I’m going to do. I’ve had a couple of internships in various areas - with other historians, conservation of heritage sites, and even as a library curator. But I haven’t settled on anything yet. There’s still time. And as Carly says - that trip around Europe will probably inspire me.
Except…I think I know that wherever my future is, it’s going to be in Aldora. It felt difficult and awkward and almost impossible, the first major public event I did when I returned, but…there was the same element I felt before. That if I’m there with Derek, and talking to small groups of people…well, I think I love the Aldoran people. And I know I love Derek.
It might have been inevitable and obvious to everyone else, but at some point…I’m going to end up taking that terrifying Princesca title. And everything else it means.
“We’re almost there.” Derek announces, and I look around at the surrounding forest that looks a lot like the forest we’ve been passing through for over an hour.
“I really think you’re making this up.” I say.
He shoots me a grin. “Trust me.”
And, despite knowing better, I do. I trust him. Even with this.
He continues talking about his time in Aldora - passing on various messages
from Adele, and his mother, who I’ve actually started to get on with pretty well, and mentions a new recipe that he needs to give me from the castle chef.
“Oh.” I interrupt. “Wait a minute - did Nicolas say anything about my suggestions for Aldora’s tourist board yet?”
He laughs at me, and rolls his eyes.
“Two days into this trip and you’ve already asked about Nicolas nearly a dozen times. I’m starting to think you like him better than me.”
I raise my eyebrows, looking over. It’s true, I do ask about Nicolas a lot - now that I’ve got to know him a bit, he’s actually become almost a firm friend. A firm friend that I don’t really talk to, because I’m not really there and he doesn’t do much talking, but someone who I somehow know that we can rely on. And I think I worry about him occasionally, just a little. It’s hard to think of his austere, impassive face and believe that he’s actually happy.
But I haven’t mentioned him that many times - this is the first time I’ve seen Derek for a couple of weeks, on a trip that he insisted on to celebrate the end of college. I agreed in a heartbeat - with the only criteria that we should be completely alone. It never feels like we get any alone time these days. And he’s obliged beautifully - I don’t think I’ve seen anyone else on this whole island since we arrived, and…yeah, Nicolas hasn’t ended up on my mind all that often.
Still…
I give Derek a slow, suggestive smile. “Maybe I do. He didn’t laugh at me when I first mentioned you guys should set up a tourist board for Aldora.”
“That’s only because he never laughs at anything.” Derek grins back, walking closer to me again. “He probably just stared at you with those intense, unreadable eyes. Maybe I should take that up, if you like it so much. Starey-stare-stare.”
He does exactly what he says, looking intently at me with an almost-straightfaced expression, and it completely cracks me up.
“Nope. Definitely not.” I wrap my arms around him, and kiss him deeply, which takes all of two seconds to dissolve his attempt at a severe expression into a grin. “Don’t ever stop laughing with me, Derek.”
He kisses me back, and his eyes twinkle at me. “I never will, Princesca.”
Eventually, the forest does actually open up and we end up where he’s been promising. It takes maybe an hour or two longer than he thinks it will - but the moment we get there, I can’t even bring myself to tease him about it.
It’s simply stunning.
We’re right at the top of the island, and we can see…what seems like forever…all around us. The trees going all the way back down to the beach - the sea stretching on endlessly under the sky. And other parts of the island too.
He takes my hand and leads me around to the other side of the little clearing overlooking it all - and I can see the other side of the island. He points out the places he’s going to take me - the quaint village on the rolling hills, the little harbor by the sea, and a group of seriously impressive ruins. My heart rises into my throat, and I realize he really did research this place.
“It’s amazing, Derek. Absolutely stunning and—”
My voice completely cuts out as I turn towards him and…he’s not there. Or, he is. But just…on the ground.
Down on one knee.
My heart catches in my throat, and everything inside me quivers as he reaches into his pocket and looks up at me.
Oh my god. Oh god.
“I love you Hanna. More than I ever imagined I could love anyone - and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I know you’ve known that for years already, and if you were to ask anyone from my country, they’d say we were already engaged. But I wanted to do it properly - for you. And us.” He opens the box in his hands, and I look down…at an absolutely gorgeous ring. It’s delicate and feminine - and while it still has emeralds and sapphires in it, they’re tiny stones around one elegantly set diamond. “Will you marry me, Hanna? Will you be my wife, and Princess, and make me complete for the rest of my life?”
Oh god.
I’m crying. I can’t help it. I can feel the tears running down my face as my heart squeezes in my chest. I try to wipe at my eyes under my glasses as I nod, my throat thick and tight and unable to form words for a long moment.
“Yes.” I finally say, slightly hoarse. “Yes, Derek. I’ve been yours for so long now, and yes…I want to be your wife. And I want to be Aldora’s Princess too. Oh god…I can’t believe…”
He smiles up at me, slips the ring onto my finger, and I’m still staring at it in amazement as he stands and pulls me to him, kissing me deeply.
“Thank you, Princesca. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
I shudder in his arms, smiling and happy and delirious, with my eyes wet and heart the highest, fullest it’s ever been, as the same feeling rips through me.
This is all I’ve ever wanted, too.
THE END
This copy of Pretend Princess With Benefits also includes a bonus copy of Hitman on Campus – keep reading to enjoy it!
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BONUS BOOK:
HITMAN ON CAMPUS
A Bad Boy Romance
Chapter One
Caleb
A loud ringing drags me out of the sleep-haze I’m in and starts a painful throbbing right behind my eyes, making me groan as the mother of all hangovers begins. It takes me a moment to work out that the noise isn’t coming from inside my head, and then my hand stumbles around as I mutter a few curses and try to find the bedside table.
Fuck. They know better than to bother me the night after a hit. This had better be fucking important.
I shift the girl to my right out of the way and finally seize the damn phone, squinting through blurred vision at the number.
Double fuck. My father. One of the only bastards I’d pick up for at this time.
“Wha’ the ffuu—” My dry mouth can’t make the words come out right, but my father isn’t listening anyway - probably a good thing, since I don’t know what the hell I’m saying either.
“Caleb. Boss wants to talk to you. Now. So get rid of the girl sucking your cock and move your ass out of bed.”
“There’ss no—”
Oh. I bite back a groan as hot lips close around my morning wood. So that’s what the wriggling had been about. My hand reaches down to land in her hair and my eyes close automatically, my body ready to lose itself in the easy pleasure - before my father’s words finally make their way through my fuzzy mind.
I can’t help but laugh. He really does know me well. Probably because he does the exact same shit too. I pull the girl off, ignoring her muttered protest, and return what limited attention I have to the phone call.
“Ughh…’kay…” It takes me a moment to realize he’s already hung up and then I let my head crash back onto the pillow, throwing the phone in the approximate direction of the table. The answering thud tells me that it’s landed on the floor and I groan again, squeezing my eyes tightly shut.
I’ve done a lot of fucking hard things in my life, but getting up right now? That’s asking a helluva lot.
The two girls on either side of me start shifting, restless from the disturbance despite the ungodly amount of alcohol that should have put them under - and even in this state, my eyes travel admiringly over glimpses of soft, warm curves.
For one brief moment I consider closing my eyes again, pulling the pretty blonde back over my cock and spending the day indulging in every hangover cure I know. Just for a moment. Then I picture keeping Patrick Sullivan waiting, and that’s enough to spur me into the slow-hobbled kind of action I can manage right now.
Reluctantly, I push the blonde half-lying over me onto her friend and try not
to get distracted by the way their bodies immediately wrap around each other. Then I grab the edge of the bed like my life depends on it - which it probably does - and swing my legs over and my body into an upright position.
My stomach immediately roils at the motion, nausea assaulting me as my head spins and I curse yet again.
This is a fucking stupid idea.
I grab for the glass of water on the bedside table and by the time I’ve downed it, I feel like standing won’t kill me. Probably.
“Where—”
“C’m back t’ bed…”
The girls finally notice I’m leaving as I stagger around the room looking for the clothes I discarded the night before - and, damn it, wherever my phone landed.
“Wish I could, babe…fucking wish I could.” I mutter, not really caring if they hear me.
Instead, I pull together my wallet, keys and phone and give them a wave they probably don’t even notice.
“Thanks for last night, girls. Was fun.”
I get maybe one confused look before I shut the door and turn my attention to dealing with the way the floor is trying to trip me up as I make my way down the hallway and out of my apartment building.
I have no idea whether they’ll still be there when I get back - or, hell, what time that’ll be. But since I don’t even know which I’d prefer, I’m not going to waste time dealing with them.
When I get out of the small, run-down apartment building, I hail a cab and give him Sullivan’s business address. It’s only a few blocks from here and as the cab lurches into rush-hour Baltimore traffic, my stomach turns at the rough choice of transport. I roll down the window for some air, and then quickly reverse the motion as fumes assault me and add to the growing nausea.
Usually I’d walk, and despite being in dire need of the fresh air and a little time to clear my head, I can’t risk it in this state. I’d probably take a wrong turn and spend half an hour wandering around in a blur.
