When he reached out and tenderly tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, a pang of envy shot through Muriel. It wasn’t the general yearning she’d felt while watching Kevin Mazze with his wife. This ache in her chest and stomach stemmed from a deep desire to know what it would be like to serve as Mathew’s sub, to be the object of his desire, the one who touched his softer side.
Even though he’d maintained a few long-term relationships over the years, she’d never seen him madly in love. No one had been the spark that lightened the dark shadows in his eyes. As ridiculous as it seemed, considering the way he felt about her, Muriel often wondered what it would be like to be that person. He possessed such an intensity that when he found the right person, he would treat her like a treasured gem and all the world would know she belonged to him.
She’d always been drawn to him, but after seeing his deeply compassionate and vulnerable side following Ian’s passing, she found herself lying in bed late at night, thinking about him, recalling times she’d stolen surreptitious glances of him at the club. To be so cold and calculating in his professional life, he was an incredibly sensual and indulgent Dom, and she was more than mildly curious what it would be like under his control.
Lost to her musings, Muriel missed most of the conversation between Mathew and the other woman, but the tone seemed to switch in an instant. The woman’s temperament turned angry, Mathew’s expression cooled, and his hands fisted at his sides. The air around them crackled with tension, and when Mathew spoke, his voice carried a biting edge. “I told you I had plans this evening, Lili.”
In the next breath, the sweet kitten that approached him turned into a feral alley cat. “You’re always busy,” she shouted in a shrill tone that stopped Muriel short and had her gasping in shock. “You use me when it’s convenient, then ignore me for weeks. You’re a selfish, self-centered, self-absorbed bastard.”
Muriel flinched as Lucas muttered, “Her redundant, repetitious repetitiveness is going to land her a few recurring swats on the ass.”
It wasn’t Muriel’s place to interfere, but she’d never been able to stand by and watch conflict unfold without trying to diffuse or peacefully resolve the situation. Even though her brain screamed warnings to mind her own business, her body moved on autopilot.
She stepped forward and opened her mouth to speak, hoping to interrupt the woman’s tirade before she got herself into deeper trouble than she could climb out of. But she’d delayed too long, and she helplessly watched as the woman squared her shoulders, drew back, and slapped Mathew across the face so hard his head snapped to the side.
Muriel sucked in a breath so sharp she choked as a collective gasp shot through the gathering crowd. She froze in place, mouth hanging open, eyes wide, unable to intellectualize what she’d just witnessed.
Everyone seemed shocked into stillness… except Mathew. His face remained completely devoid of emotion as he slowly swiveled his head around and worked his jaw in a circle, shaking off the effects of the blow.
Muriel couldn’t see Mathew ever hurting a woman—he was so opposed to corporal punishment the other Doms teased him for being a pussy—but she’d heard enough rumors about his wild past and his father’s legacy that her certainty fractured.
She lunged forward and wrapped her arm around the younger woman’s shoulders, then swept her away from Mathew’s reach. There would probably be hell to pay for her interference, but she couldn’t stand by and do nothing. Both Lili and Mathew needed distance and breathing room to calm down before things continued to escalate.
She kept walking with Lili tucked under her arm until they’d reached the farthermost seating area in the front corner of the club. As soon as they rounded the grouping of chairs, Lili dropped into one of the large club chairs, threw her hands over her face, and broke into heaving sobs accompanied by uncontrolled tremors. Whether from the rush of adrenaline or shock at her behavior, Muriel didn’t know, but it was obvious the distressed girl needed help.
Kneeling next to the chair, Muriel spoke close to her ear to ensure being heard over the loud, wracking sobs. “I’m going to get you a blanket and a bottle of water. Stay right here.”
Afraid of leaving her alone too long, Muriel looked around for someone to keep an eye on her. She caught sight of Becki Wilder, a sweet submissive who’d been a member of the club since the beginning, sitting at a nearby table.
Stopping next to Becki’s chair, Muriel nodded to Lili and said, “Could you keep an eye on her while I grab a blanket?”
Becki brushed her long, red hair back from her face and grinned. “Am I keeping her from running away or protecting her from Mathew? The first I can do. Fuck the second.”
Muriel laughed and hugged Becki’s neck. “God, I’ve missed you.”
Bee-lining her way to the hallway, Muriel stopped at the first scene room—a schoolroom. The door was closed, and when she looked through the viewing window, she found a naughty schoolgirl bent over a desk, her skirt flipped up to reveal her bare ass, her mean headmaster preparing to give her another swat with the cane.
Okay, moving on…
The medical room sat across from the schoolroom, but that door was also closed so she didn’t even bother looking through the window to see if it was occupied. Next up on the right was the throne room. The door was open, so she tentatively stepped inside and peeked around.
Finding the king and queen out for the night, she ran to the large armoire in the corner and grabbed a big, fluffy blanket. She’d almost reached the door when she remembered the water, so she doubled back, opened the small refrigerator hidden in the bottom cabinet of the washbasin, and grabbed two bottles.
On the way back to Lili, she detoured by the column where Lucas and Mathew stood talking. She handed the bottle she’d grabbed for Mathew off to Lucas, then bolted before she got an earful for having run interference.
Unaware Muriel had returned, Lili nearly jumped out of the chair as she draped the blanket around her shoulders. Black mascara and eyeliner streaked her cheeks, and her nose and lips were swollen and angry red.
Settling onto her knees on the floor at an angle to the chair, Muriel uncapped the bottle and held it up to Lili. “Take a deep breath, then drink some water. It’ll help calm you.”
It took several tries, but once she finally got her swallowing under control, Lili went through the bottle in a matter of seconds. “Thank you.” She swiped at the tears still streaming down her face and drew in a ragged breath. “I don’t know what got into me,” she said, her voice filled with misery and despair. “I just completely lost my mind. I knew it was happening, but I couldn’t stop.”
Muriel chewed the inside of her cheek and contemplated an appropriate response. What did one say to a comment like that?
Shit happens.
I understand. We all lose our minds from time to time.
S’all good. No harm, no foul.
It’s cool. I’m sure Mathew didn’t mind being punched in the face. By a girl.
Deciding not replying was best, she blew out a breath and sank back onto her heels. Rather than giving the girl a useless pep talk filled with it’ll-be-okays, she decided to keep her calm and distracted. “Would you like another bottle of water? How about a soda from the bar?”
The girl shook her head and offered a weak smile. “No, thank you. I’m fine. Mostly.” The words had barely slipped from her lips when she caught sight of Mathew and Lucas approaching. The waterworks broke loose again, and the fear radiating from her was so strong she might as well have been screaming at the top of her lungs.
Mathew was often surly and intimidating, but his expression and demeanor usually reflected his mindset and let a person know if it was safe to step into the water. But the Mathew approaching them now was a blank slate.
His arms swung freely at his sides and his hands were loose and relaxed—which completely contrasted the tight set of his shoulders and jaw and the stiffness of his gait. His eyes were flat, dull orbs and gave away nothing, leaving
them no way to gauge his thoughts and no way to prepare for what was to come.
Muriel’s only concern was possible repercussions for swooping in like a hawk and stealing Mathew’s prey from his clutches, but even she was disconcerted as hell by the cold, emotionless man approaching. Seeing no need to stick around—Mathew could give her hell later, after he’d finished with Lili—Muriel gave Lili’s hand a reassuring squeeze, then prepared to stand.
She didn’t get far, though, as Lucas pressed down between her shoulder blades and stalled her escape. A thin sheen of sweat broke out over her skin, and she looked over her shoulder at him, silently questioning his intent.
Lord, how could she have gotten into so much trouble in the first fifteen minutes of being back?
Lucas didn’t say anything, but his smile seemed friendly—definitely not the look of a man who thought she should be taken to task for trying to save a girl’s hide—but he shook his head and dipped his chin, telling her without words she wasn’t going anywhere.
Crap. Why did she need to be a part of this? She loved erotic spankings and sensual floggings, but she despised real pain. She didn’t have the stomach to watch someone being punished and was too soft skinned for even verbal reprimands.
And she sure as hell didn’t want to watch physical contact between Mathew and… well, anyone.
She used her eyes to plead her case, but Lucas didn’t budge. His reply was simply more of the same: a soft smile and a slow shake of his head.
If she forced the issue and claimed this was too much, too fast, he would probably release his hold on her. At which point she would run to the front, grab her things, and bolt for the safety of home. As a last resort, she could always use her safeword as a means of escape. But she didn’t want to leave.
She was curious about the new addition and was enjoying the company of friends. She cast another quick glance to Lucas and Mathew. Make that mostly enjoying the company of old friends.
So while Mathew paced around the small grouping of chairs, she sat back on her heels, let her shoulders slump in defeat, and settled in for the agonizing duration.
Chapter 3
Round and round he goes… Where he’ll stop…
Mathew ran a hand through his hair and fought off the growl scratching and clawing at the back of his throat. Where he needed to stop was in front of Lili. And it needed to be pretty damn quick before he wore a path in the Oriental rug anchoring together the group of chairs.
The problem was he couldn’t pinpoint a single emotion or even a predominant thought to set him on a solid path of what to say. Of course he was angry with Lili for her outburst and for busting his chops—literally. But he was furious with himself over his piss-poor job of setting boundaries and making sure the scope of their relationship was clear. He was disappointed with himself for being so preoccupied with the addition that he’d left her feeling neglected. And he was sad he’d allowed things to deteriorate to this point. Her first foray into the world of Dominance and submission should have been a better experience, and that truth circled him back around to anger.
However, as he made another pass around the group and his attention settled on Muriel, thoughts of Lili scattered like leaves in the wind, and he nearly tripped. Jesus, how many times had he dreamed of having Muriel on her knees at his feet?
His fantasies, however, never played out like this.
Her shoulders were stiff, her breathing shallow, and she seemed as unhappy about sticking around for the show as he was to have her here. But as Lucas accurately pointed out, she seemed to be a grounding force for Lili, so it would be good to have her present while he and Lili talked.
But who was going to keep him grounded? Muriel’s effect on him was far from calming, and her presence—on her goddamned knees—had him as pressurized as a cork ready to blow.
His gaze dropped to her crocheted top and the nipple playing peek-a-boo through the large weave. As if knowing it was the object of his attention, the rosy bud tightened and slipped through the hole in the fabric, teasing him… taunting him… daring him to lean down and suck it into his mouth. He rocked forward on the balls of his feet, and water puddled in his mouth as he nearly gave in to the temptation. But one taste of Muriel wouldn’t satisfy his craving.
The woven top and sheer white skirt were more modest than anything Ian allowed her to wear to the club, but Mathew liked them. He’d never seen Muriel completely naked, and he enjoyed the sneak peeks that allowed him to develop a full image based on the quick flashes of flesh.
He pinched the bridge of his nose and ground his teeth together. Dear God, what he wouldn’t do to slide up her skirt, push the thong he’d glimpsed down her lean legs, and feast on her for the next four hours until she was exhausted and he’d had his fill. Except, once again, he was reminded one taste would never be enough.
Her head was bent, and she picked at a nonexistent piece of something on her skirt while Lili stared at her clenched fingers. Neither of them was aware of his divided attention, but Lucas, the all-seeing son of a bitch, hadn’t missed a thing. His eyebrow rose and the corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk as he watched Mathew’s mental gymnastics.
Exhausted from his heavy caseload and late nights working on the new addition, as well as being bone-weary from years of fighting his nearly debilitating obsession over Muriel, Mathew struggled to give a fuck about Lucas reading his lascivious thoughts. Besides, Lucas was the genius who developed the plan of playing with her tonight, so what if Mathew got a mental head start?
After another couple laps, he forced himself to stop and planted his hands on his waist. Since they weren’t strictly a BDSM club, Pandora’s didn’t have a lot of stringent rules and protocols for behavior. However, he personally had a rule that prohibited anyone from getting away with assault. To ignore the incident, or to even brush it off, would also be a terrible disservice to Lili, who had expressed an interest in becoming a full-time submissive.
He grabbed an empty chair and swung it around so he sat facing her, which ended up putting Muriel directly beside him… on her knees.
Son of a bitch.
This conversation with Lili was too important for him to be further distracted with Muriel, so he put on blinders, shut down his libido, and focused on the woman in front of him rather than the sweet-smelling female beside him. Resting his elbows on his knees, he leaned forward so he was closer to Lili and not as clearly able to see Muriel.
“I have no idea what that was all about, but I can’t ignore what just happened.”
She twisted her fingers together and sniffled. “Yes, Sir.”
“Because you’re new to BDSM, you’re like a toddler who’s just beginning to explore this big, new world. You need freedom to learn what you do and don’t like, but you also need boundaries. For your own safety, as well as your peace of mind, you need to know if you go too far into dangerous territory, someone will pull you back and keep you safe.”
A fat tear escaped the corner of her eye, landed on her collarbone, then slid down the center of her chest. Her large breasts, round belly, and bountiful hips were a well-equipped playground that had provided him hours of entertainment over the past several months. But after this short time of being with Muriel, Lili’s soft plushness no longer held appeal.
He hated this turn of events, but ending his relationship with Lili was necessary. If Muriel would be a regular at the club again, the cool indifference he currently felt toward Lili would certainly become his new norm. And he didn’t want to give her any more reasons to feel bad about herself or doubt her choice of exploring this lifestyle. Especially when the problem lay squarely with him and had nothing to do with her.
Getting back on track, he said, “I remember the first time I grasped what it really meant to have someone care enough to discipline me. My parents gave me free rein to do whatever I wanted. My junior and senior years of high school were like two long seasons of Matt Gone Wild. I was on the fast track to self-destruction, drinking and experimentin
g with every drug known to man. And then I met this kid at school named Ian.”
He shook his head and ran his hand over his face, recalling how Ian looked back then. Six feet, two inches of uncoordinated lankiness with shiny braces, he was the coolest nerd Mathew ever met. He wished he could say if they’d met Muriel in high school, rather than college, Mathew would’ve been the one to get the girl. But even then, despite his awkwardness and less-than-stellar complexion, Ian’s supercharged charm and all-around niceness would’ve guaranteed the same outcome. And rightfully so.
As Mathew’s breathing grew labored and his saliva turned to glue, clogging his throat and making swallowing damn near impossible, he glanced at Muriel to see if talk of Ian was upsetting her. He should’ve known better than to worry, though, because not only was she rock solid, as always, but she surprised the hell out of him when she lifted her head enough to catch his eye, then smiled and winked.
The silent communication between them caught Lili’s attention, and her interest in Muriel spiked. Even though his gaze was locked on Muriel’s, he saw Lili’s head swiveling back and forth between them. Since Lili had only been a club member for a few months, he doubted she knew Muriel and briefly wondered if he should make an introduction. But he didn’t want to share this private moment with Muriel with anyone, so he let formality fall by the wayside and got back to his story.
“My parents were having a… gathering.” As an adult, looking at things through a different lens than the one he’d used as a kid, he often wondered how many illegal transactions took place at his father’s get-togethers. In reality, the better question would be did any legal activities take place?
“I got bored and decided to take my dad’s Ferrari for a joy ride. I picked up Ian, and a bunch of beers and a few joints later, I put the car into a ditch. I was all for leaving it there and letting my dad deal with the problem of getting it home, but Ian freaked out and called his mom.” He laughed and shook his head. “He was such a friggin’ choir boy. I never figured out why he hung out with me, but thank God he did.”
Coveted (Pandora's Playground #1) Page 3
