by T. S. Joyce
“I can’t see your bruises anymore,” he observed. Maybe conversation would stifle his urge to lead her back into 1010, bend her over the bed, and take her from behind until she screamed his name in pleasure.
“Yeah, Brooke has some really good foundation she got when her attacker hurt her face. She let me have it. Now I won’t have to hide behind my hair anymore.”
His face stretched in a smile. “I like that. I like seeing your face.” He brushed his finger down her cheek. “Your eyes.”
Skyler leaned against his hand, her soft jaw contrasting against the rough callouses of his palm.
“You hungry?” he asked, the urge to take care of her overwhelming.
“Starving.”
He leaned forward slowly and kissed her forehead. It was a long time before he could convince himself to take his lips from her smooth skin. She was an amazing woman, and she didn’t cringe at his touch. His addiction to her was growing by the second. When he finally pulled away, he said, “Come on. I’ll get you a plate.”
When she was settled in a seat upwind of the fire, he piled her plate high with steak, fire-grilled corn on the cob, and fruit salad. Only when she was settled and her Dixie cup full did he make his own.
The murmur of the crew shootin’ the shit after a long day on the job site calmed Kellen’s frayed nerves. Everything was fine. When he’d told her he wasn’t the mating kind, she hadn’t even batted an eyelash. She still asked for intimacy, she didn’t seem mad, and she wasn’t pushing him for more. He could do this. He could toe the line between too much relationship with Skyler and just enough.
Jed had done it. Shit, Jed was a terrible example. His mate had left him to live in Saratoga, a couple of hours away. She wasn’t built for life mated to a logger. Or for wilderness at all, really. Highfalutin smarmy witch who berated the crew at every turn. He’d been glad when she left. Unfortunately, it ripped up their alpha at the time, made him off-his-rocker-crazy, and threw the entire crew into uncertainty and chaos.
What if Skyler left because he couldn’t offer her more? What if she went back to Roger in desperation for commitment Kellen wasn’t able to give?
“Hey,” Skyler murmured as he sat down with his food and half-empty beer bottle. “What’s wrong? You look panicked.”
Her hand on his forearm soothed him, and he attempted a smile. “Just thinking.” Too damned much. He wasn’t a smart man. Never had been, never would be. It wasn’t his low self-esteem that admitted this. He had good attributes such as loyalty, a strong back, a level head under pressure, a mechanical mind, and skill with big machinery. Thinking too much like this confused him more than he usually was and stressed him the hell out.
“Did I do something wrong?”
“No.” The word came out too loud, too forceful. “No,” he said, softer. “I’m just scared I won’t be what you need. That I won’t make you better.”
The smile faded from her lips. “I don’t need you to fix me, silly bear. You’ve already done enough. You took me away when I wasn’t able to get myself out of the predicament I’d found with Roger. I can take it from here. I just need you to be my friend.”
“Good. Just a friend.” That word pierced him, but it was what he needed, too. His head cleared, and the jumbled mess in his mind slowly faded away. “I can be that.”
Her face fell, and she slid her hand off his arm. “Okay.”
Skyler didn’t speak to him after that. She ate in silence as the other men informed Brooke of all she’d missed while she was away. The snake in Haydan’s toilet, the raccoons that stole a carton of eggs Tagan had left unattended by the grill for too long. The rope swing the boys had tied over the creek, and the makeshift skateboard ramp Bruiser had made. Drew had jumped off a roof onto it and broken the ramp into splinters. The usual shit that often led to minor injuries and more bad ideas. Brooke shook her head and called them “man plans,” but she didn’t try too hard to hide her amusement.
The fireflies lit up the woods that surrounded the trailer park, and Skyler watched them with wide-eyed wonder. Kellen couldn’t take his eyes off her. God, she was beautiful. She was also rubbing the gooseflesh on her arms. It was June and warm enough during the daylight hours, but nights were always cool, especially in the mountains.
Kellen stood and retrieved his jacked from his trailer, then dropped it around her shoulders from behind. Skyler jumped, as if he’d startled her, but smiled her thanks. It didn’t reach her eyes though, and Kellen knew he’d failed to keep his turmoil to himself. She was smart and probably saw right through him. He had to do better than this.
He opened his mouth to ask her if she wanted anything else to drink, but Denison beat him to it.
“You sure have a pretty tone to your voice, Skyler,” Denison said. “You sing?”
Brighton had been plucking away at his old guitar for the better part of half an hour now, and he looked up from the fret he was fingering as Skyler seemed to mull over her answer.
She pulled her shoulders up to her ears, as if she didn’t like the attention on her. “In the shower.”
“Mmm,” Denison said, tapping the toe of his work boot in rhythm to Brighton’s plucking of the strings across the fire. He reclined in his old plastic chair. “I bet you have a folksy, bluesy, country-sounding voice. What kind of music do you like?”
Skyler dipped her gaze to her lap and hid a smile. “Folksy, bluesy, country-sounding music.”
“Name your favorite band,” Denison challenged her.
Tagan stretched his legs out and wrapped his arm around Brooke’s shoulders, then angled his face and glared at Skyler thoughtfully while she contemplated an answer.
“Lately, I like The Drues.”
Denison nodded slowly. “You know Ash and Dust?”
Skyler’s dark eyebrows wrenched up. “Do you know Ash and Dust?”
The notes changed as Brighton picked a slower chord, and Skyler huffed a soft laugh. “Of course y’all do.”
“You better not leave me hanging on the harmony,” Denison said, all but daring her to step up. “The girl’s part either.”
“Do I really have to do this? In front of everyone?”
“We can all sing really badly with you if you’d like,” Bruiser offered.
“The hell you will,” Denison said, leaning his elbows on his knees. “She’s got this.” He swung his gaze to Skyler’s over the flames and lowered his chin. “You’ve got this.”
Kellen fidgeted. He didn’t want her uncomfortable, and he sure as hell didn’t want her clamming up from being put on the spot. Really, he wanted to protect her from all the prying eyes that seemed to make her so uncomfortable, tuck her under his arm, and run off into the woods with her.
That wouldn’t help Skyler open up, though. It would hurt her if he coddled her.
Kellen’s heart was pounding, and his blood was roaring in his ears, loud enough that he missed the first few lyrics Denison sang in his rich tenor. Brighton strummed louder as his twin’s voice sang out.
“Said she was better off beside me
But she don’t see what I do
She’s way too good for a rambler like me
So I told her we were through.”
Denison lifted his chin and gave an encouraging smile to Skyler. Then sang the first line of the chorus.
“Broken heart…”
Skyler trailed with the same lyrics in harmony, and Kellen drew up straight at how beautiful her voice was. Like a bell with a shot of perfect vibrato at the end, quiet at first, but building.
Denison’s deep voice came in again.
“Broken time
Nothing left
She took what’s mine.”
“He took what’s mine,” Skyler trailed in complimentary, haunting notes.
“Holy shit,” Drew murmured, grinning at Skyler.
“Shhh,” Denison said, throwing him a quick frown, then pulled his attention back to Skyler, who straightened her spine beside Kellen, and clasped her hands i
n her lap.
Denison caught the right notes and continued.
“I’m ash and dust
Hopin’ she’s made of the same
Pack my suitcase
Board that train
Damn the weather
Damn the rain
Gonna go and get my baby.”
Denison leaned back with a grin and a shake of his head. “It’s you now, girl. Bring it home.”
Skyler inhaled deeply and lifted her voice in soft, longing notes in rhythm with Brighton’s chords.
“He said I was better off without him
But he don’t see what I do
He’s the biggest part about me
After all that we’ve been through.
Broken heart…”
“Broken heart,” Denison trailed, stronger.
Skyler lifted her voice.
“Broken time
Nothing left
He took what’s mine
We’re ash and dust
We’re made the same
Pack my suitcase
Board that train
Damn the weather
Damn the rain
Gonna go and leave my baby.”
They sang a new part for Denison, stronger, with more emotion, and Kellen couldn’t take his eyes away from Skyler. She closed her eyes and swayed to the music as that beautiful sound came from her. And when the final chorus was almost through, she opened her eyes and smiled in the easiest expression he’d seen on her face since he’d met her. She was stunning. The roaring in his ears died to nothing as she held one last, perfect note, then leaned back and clapped along with everyone else. She laughed, strong and free, and pulled her clasped hands up to the side of her blushing cheeks, as if she was embarrassed by the applause.
Brighton stood and gave her a hug, and Denison stepped around the fire and did the same, murmuring something in her ear that made her look so proud. Kellen was enamored into silence, watching her interact with his people like she’d always been a part of them. She was magnificent. She was commanding every attention he possessed.
She was everything.
Her eyes danced to him, and her smile faded, as if she waited for his opinion, and it mattered. As if this would all be ruined if he didn’t approve. Damn Roger for doing that little number to her.
Reservations out the window, he tugged her onto his lap and hugged her tight, nuzzling her neck. “I’m so damned proud of you, I could die of it,” he whispered against her ear.
She giggled and slid her arms around her neck. “That was so scary,” she admitted.
“You were perfect. Your voice is beautiful, Skyler. You’re beautiful.” He cupped her face and searched her striking eyes. His reflection met him in the green color, hopeful looking and open. He smiled just before his lips brushed hers, floored that his bear had stayed settled and quiet all night. That never happened. He didn’t have any doubt in his mind it was because of her. She settled him, made him happy and calm.
He eased back after a tender kiss and hugged her waist closer as he relaxed into the chair.
The others settled into easy banter as Brighton strummed a new song.
Skyler rested her back against his chest and took the last sip of his warm beer. “You want another?”
“No,” he said, stroking his fingers across her stomach. He loved that she was small compared to him. Not fragile or overly thin, but strong and the perfect height to rest his chin on the top of her head. “I have a one beer limit.”
She frowned. “Why?”
“You don’t want to know.”
Twisting in his lap, she rested her hand on his chest and said, “I want to know everything about you.”
Kellen sighed, flattered that she cared, but terrified she’d want to draw him into a conversation he wasn’t ready for. “My old man was a boozer. I’ve never had more than a beer at a time as a precaution.”
“Oh,” she whispered. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I hardly remember him,” he lied.
Her eyebrows quirked, as if she could hear the fib. Maybe she could. He didn’t know what her senses were capable of.
Tagan came to warm his hands by the fire while his mate talked to Bruiser. Skyler wiggled out of Kellen’s lap and stood next to his alpha. “Can I talk to you?” she asked.
“Shoot,” Tagan said in a clipped tone.
Skyler looked around, then stepped closer to him. Kellen didn’t want to eavesdrop. It wasn’t his way, but he was trapped behind them in the chair, too close to get up without it being obvious, and his hearing was impeccable.
“Brooke told me what happened to Conner. I’m sorry for your loss and for what you had to do, but I was wondering if his job was available.”
Tagan jerked his gaze to hers, his face highlighted by the flickering orange glow of the firelight. “You want work as a lumberjack?”
“I’m not picky about the job. Kellen said I need to earn my own way so I can feel independent again, and I agree with him. When I earned my own income before Roger chose me, I felt stronger. It would make it easier to leave him if I wasn’t dependent on him.”
“I thought you were planning on leaving tomorrow,” Tagan said low.
“Well, that’s part of what I wanted to discuss with you. I know this is a risk to you and your people, me being here. If it’s too much, I’ll gladly leave. But if you have an opening on your crew and are fine with me here, I’d work real hard. I’m a fast learner, too, and stronger than I look.”
“Stronger than you look,” Tagan said, narrowing his eyes. “Because this job isn’t some easy come, easy pay job. It’s hard work from sun up until sundown. It’s physical and dangerous, and the crew depends on each other. One weak link could get my men hurt, or worse. I can’t hire a weak link, you understand?”
“I understand.” Her voice was soft and defeated as she stared at her shoes.
Tagan inhaled noisily. A muscle in his jaw ticked as he clenched his teeth. “Prove you are strong, and I’ll consider a probation period.”
Skyler’s eyes opened wide, and she lifted her chin until she met Tagan’s cool gaze. She pursed her lips in a thin line of determination. “What do I have to do?”
Chapter Seven
Tagan didn’t answer Skyler’s question. Instead, he whistled a shrill sound behind his teeth and jerked his head toward the trailer on the end of Asheford Drive. The Ashe crew grew immediately quiet and stood as one.
“Why are you doing this,” Kellen asked, standing with his friends. “Why are you testing her?”
“Kellen,” Tagan barked. “That’s enough. If you want her, that’s your choice. It’s my choice who I pick for my crew. If she can’t prove herself, I’ll find someone else to replace Connor. Someone who has half a shot at not getting one of you killed.”
A soft rumble emanated from Kellen, but one withering look from his alpha quieted him down.
Skyler was scared. Hands shaking, palms sweating, pulse pounding through her like a war drum.
Tagan led them around the back of the trailer. It was dark away from the bonfire, but Drew disappeared, and moments later, strings of holiday lights illuminated an oversize and dilapidated metal roof that protected gym equipment and work-out machines from Mother Nature. Tagan’s gaze roved over the dumbbells and a row machine. He took his time choosing, and the more he thought, the more nervous Skyler became. This was so much worse than Denison putting her on the spot and making her sing. This was a job interview. Her freedom could be made or broken here tonight.
Brooke stood behind her mate but watched Skyler with her lips pursed in a thin line.
“I think we’ll keep it simple.” Tagan pointed to Bruiser, the biggest of the bear shifters. He was taller than a Sasquatch with arms swollen with muscle. “Plank position.”
Bruiser dropped down on his hands and tiptoes without question and waited for the next command.
“You ever done a pushup before?” Tagan asked.
Skyler’
s stomach clenched, and she nodded miserably. If she’d had any question about whether Tagan wanted her in his crew before now, it would’ve been squashed with this impossible task he was setting her to. Bruiser looked unbeatable. “I used to instruct skydivers. I had to be physically fit to work my job.”
Tagan lifted his chin and looked down at her. “Good. Plank position.”
She dropped down and gritted her teeth, focusing on the corner of the metal cage that housed a squat rack.
“You’ll go against Bruiser here, pushup for pushup, and if you fall first, you leave tomorrow like you planned.”
The snarl was back in Kellen’s throat, and he took a stumbling step forward, as if he couldn’t help himself. His eyes reflected oddly in the dim light, and he smelled like fur.
“Kellen,” Skyler warned as he took a second step toward Tagan.
“If you outlast him,” Tagan continued, ignoring his Second, “then you can come to work tomorrow. After a week, I’ll decide whether you are fit for my crew or not. But first, you have to beat old Bruiser over there. Do you still think you want to do this?”
“Yes,” she rushed. “I’m going to do this.” She sounded much more confident than she felt, thank the stars.
Tagan crossed his arms over his chest, his triceps flexing. If it was for intimidation, it worked. She wished he would get on with it already because her arms and shoulders were already starting to burn. And old Bruiser looked as comfortable as could be.
“Drew,” Tagan said, then nodded his chin toward Bruiser.
Slowly, Drew settled onto Bruiser’s back.
Relief flooded Skyler, dumping adrenaline into her veins. The task was still utterly impossible, but at least she felt better with Bruiser’s added weight. The yeti’s arms began to shake, and she gave him a slow, challenging smile.
“Begin,” Tagan said in a bored voice.
Skyler lowered herself down.
“One,” the Ashe crew counted as she and Bruiser straightened their arms.
“Two.”
“Three.”
“Four.”
Kellen crouched in front of her with a curious smile on his face. “Good,” he said. “You can do this.”
And suddenly, she felt like she could. Or at least she could give this all she had and be proud of her effort. Tagan was trying to push her off and weed her out, but she didn’t have to make it easy for him.