by Alexia Purdy
“Ursad, you know, a few months ago I would’ve told you that you were insane, but so much has happened, and I have to say that I wouldn’t be surprised if I was a princess.” Ursad laughed and launched into her for a tight embrace, holding her as if to never let go. When he finally did, he lingered to study her face as though committing it to memory.
“Um, Ursad, you know why I left, right?” She paused, waiting to see his response. His face melted into a more serious expression as he nodded. “I won’t tolerate you using any kind of magic or faery tricks on me. I just can’t let anyone do that to me ever again. You do understand, right?” Shade licked her now dry lips. Her mouth felt like a desert.
Ursad reached up, pushed a strand of her hair back behind her ear and nodded softly. “I promise to never hurt you again, Shade. I am indebted to you for everything.”
Shade stared at Ursad, studying his face again and wondering what it was that swirled around in his head. “Um, Ursad? I don’t want you to feel you owe me anything. I just want to be friends and know that I can trust you. Is that alright?”
Ursad stared back at her. His face seemed to fall in disappointment.
Great, I just pushed Soap away, and now I’m pushing another person away.
“I—I knew you would be upset to see me.” He pulled back, standing to pace the room. His agitation seemed to ripple through the air as his control on his magic wavered. It slipped out into the air around her, shooting across her like short gusts of wind. She wondered how much of his magic had been restored when the curse lifted. It had been a few months, but there probably hadn’t been too much to challenge him and cause him to lose his grip on his power. She wondered even now if he would try to imprison her again with his now-strengthened charms.
“Ursad, I’m not upset to see you. I really don’t know what you want from me. I’m happy to see you’re okay, cured even. What did you expect from me when we met again? That I would run into your arms like a long lost lover? I left because of your deception. You tried to trap me as your ‘pet’ in Faerie. So what if it didn’t work out because I’m also fey? The point is, you tried to do it, more than once, too! I forgive you now, but that’s all you can have from me.” She continued watching him pace until he came to a stop in the middle of the room. He moved to sink to the floor before her, looking up to meet her eyes.
“You’re right, Shade. I deserve nothing. I am still indebted to you, and that hasn’t changed. I am sorry for everything.” He bowed his head, breathing in deeply and contemplating his next words. As he brought his eyes back to hers, his face was calmer, his rage extinguished. He smiled and stood up, holding his hand out to her.
“Can I have a dance at least? Just one. Please, Shade?” he implored. Shade studied his face but found no malice at all. She sighed, smiled and nodded while taking his hand and letting him pull her up. He took his stance, embracing her and peered down at her. Soft music floated into the room from some unknown source. Shade listened to the haunting melody and let him sway her around the room. Closing her eyes, she let the music drift into her like a spell. For a moment, she was floating across the room, dancing around and around with Ursad swaying her gently. It was the most serene moment she’d had in a very long time.
The music came to a stop, but he continued to dance her around until they slowed and stilled. They stood in the center of the room and stared at each other. Shade’s heart fluttered just enough to make her panic. She pulled away, still looking at him.
“What just happened? Did you try the damn charms on me again?”
Ursad shook his head, his face filled with shock. “No, I didn’t do anything. I have to admit, I have a hard time controlling my magic since I returned to my former appearance. It has grown tenfold since I was last able to use it so many years ago. Anything you think might have happened, I swear, I didn’t do on purpose.” Looking defeated, he sank down into one of the sofas, leaned forward with his head in his hands and sighed.
“I didn’t want to tell you who I was at first, not in front of them. I’ve tried to appear strong, so sure in my actions and words as a Prince. Yet inside, I am in pieces, and my soul quivers with uncertainty. I’ve been able to reassume the throne of the North, but I had to fight hard for it. Once they saw I was truly the ruthless Prince I once was, there was no longer any doubt.” He looked up and watched her face for any emotions.
“I’m not the same person anymore, Shade. I find myself emptier than when I was in exile. It’s made my world stand still. It’s a constraint—and a freedom—I don’t know if I want anymore. I stay for my people. I stay to fight this evil called Aveta who tries to invade my lands with her cursed armies. I hold my borders for now, but I need this alliance with Queen Zinara probably as much as she does. I have so much to make up for. I can never repay you or anyone else I’ve hurt in my life.” He sighed but never looked away from her.
Shade gave him a nod and stood up from the sofa. Standing over him, she held her hand out.
“I forgive you. I know we both have much to learn, and the magic of Faerie grows wilder with everything that’s brewing. I promise I’ll help you if you promise to help me, too. Deal?” Her hand trembled as she held it out. She felt tired and hungry, and she wanted to see what her friends were doing. She counted Ursad as not quite a friend, but they’d have to figure that out, all in good time.
He smiled and gripped her hand, nodding in agreement.
“Come on, don’t you have a nice dinner feast readied for your old pal? I’m starved.” Shade let out a nervous laugh as she waited for his answer.
Ursad laughed and nodded. He moved to stand beside her, offering his arm to escort her out. “Let’s get some good food.”
Chapter Six
DINNER FLITTED BY quickly, and Shade was thankful for it. She was exhausted. The mind struggle with Ursad had drained her so much, she wondered if his loose magic had anything to do with it. Sary had kept her company, glancing at her with concern, but not wanting to ask her about Ursad. She knew Shade would tell her if she wanted to. In the meantime, Sary’s patience was a godsend.
Dylan had not said much at all through dinner, either. In fact, Shade had a nagging suspicion he was either avoiding her or wanted to give her space. Either way, she was glad to not have to deal with his moodiness tonight. Soap was the only one who seemed to have a bright outlook. He’d attempted to lighten the mood with a constant stream of chatter and jokes. Shade had nodded and smiled when appropriate but stayed lost in her own thoughts as she ate. She felt bad not engaging with him, especially after he’d put his heart on his sleeve that afternoon, but she just had way too much on her mind to tolerate any kind of mind sparring. Retreating to her room after dinner was a relief. She had curled into the soft covers and faded away before she could even turn the lights off.
Something woke her in the dead of the night. Her head was throbbing even though she’d been sleeping hard. She sat up in bed and rubbed her forehead, wondering if she was coming down with something. She hoped not. All she had was the healing potion Braelynn had given to her prior to the journey. Faeries never got ill. It was being human that had its disadvantages.
The room was dark. Sary had probably turned off the lights when she had entered after Shade was asleep. She fumbled to find the lamp next to her bed in the dim light of the moon. Finally finding the switch, she flicked it on and squeezed her eyes shut as the room flooded with light. She blinked as her eyes focused and looked around. Sary was not in the next bed. It lay smooth and untouched. Shade wondered where she could be. Who had turned the lights off, then? she thought to herself.
She attempted to stand, but the throb filled her head with an intensity which caused her to sit right back down. Groaning, she held her head by the temples and breathed in until the pounding dulled somewhat. She reached for her pack on the floor and willed the potion to come to her. It appeared immediately and she unscrewed the top and knocked down a sip. She recapped it and stuffed it back into the pack, letting it flop back to
the floor. Tossing herself back onto her pillow, she laid her arm across her head. She’d been having more frequent headaches lately. Stress seemed to be the culprit.
Shade.
She sat up, swearing she’d heard a voice whisper her name. She scanned the room, relieved at the same time that the throb in her head was only a small, annoying, pulsating twinge now. Shade waited in the silence but found nothing amiss. She sighed. I’m hearing things. She waited another moment before lying back down on the bed. She wished Sary was there, but she’d probably stayed with Stephen for the night.
She pulled the blanket up to her chin and closed her eyes, leaving the light on, just in case. She was finally calming enough to almost fade back out when she heard the whisper again.
Shade.
This time she jumped out of bed and grabbed her bag. Her dagger was clasped in her hand before she even realized she’d called it. She scanned the room and again found nothing. She checked under the beds and then checked the bathroom adjacent to the room. Still nothing. She decided to check outside her door to be sure no one was around, in case someone was feeling like a prankster tonight.
She swung her door open and found no one standing in the dim hallway as she scanned both ends. The abandoned halls were strangely silent. Listening for what seemed like an eternity, she frowned, unsatisfied and unsure of what to do. She closed and locked the door behind her. She was fairly certain Sary was not returning to their room that night.
Oh well, she can knock, thought Shade.
She slid back into bed and stuffed the dagger under her pillow. She shut the light off and closed her eyes, letting the darkness engulf her.
Shade, you must find me. I can help you.
The slight whisper was gentle and reassuring this time. Shade let its soothing tone wrap around her as she answered, mumbling in her sleepy state before fading into unconsciousness.
“Okay, I will… tomorrow.”
*****
DAWN CRACKED THROUGH the window, penetrating her eyelids with its burning light. Shade turned away, groaning and drowsy. Her sleep had been fitful, leaving her exhausted. She yawned and stretched, feeling sleep slip away and wakefulness push at her. She lay there for a moment, wondering about the events of the night and the day prior. So many things had happened, and they were gnawing at her head like dogs on bones. She sat up slowly and scratched her scalp, rubbed her eyes and lifted them to the blasted windows she was beginning to loathe.
The sky was a deep grey and orange as the sun bled over the forest canopy. Her room overlooked the treetops and on to the distant mountains like a glass watchtower. She wondered if it was just as see-through from the outside. Closing her eyes, she let the rising sun gleam its warmth over her face.
She swung her legs over the side of the bed and glanced over to Sary’s bed, half hoping to see her figure lumped under the blankets. The bed remained untouched. She sighed as she stretched her neck from side to side. She remembered the whispers in the night, and the memory sent shivers up her spine. It wasn’t her long lost spirit guides, Elaby, Astrid and Duende. They rarely visited her in dreams anymore. No, the whisper had awakened her in the night, beckoning her with something—she knew not what. Shade strained to remember if it had come from a woman or a man. It had been so ambiguous in its urgent quietness.
Shaking her head, she decided to think about it later and moved on. She grabbed her clothes and headed for the bathroom to ready herself for the day. She was anxious to get the day moving, not certain what was else was going to surprise her. She wanted to find the twin guards Andraste and Draden and ask them the many questions that had been left unanswered the last time they met, especially the ones about her real father.
Shade finished up in the bathroom as quickly as she could. She brushed her damp hair back into a tight ponytail and pulled on her backpack before slipping out of the room and into the long ornamental hallway. She looked down both sides from her door and chewed on her lip as she realized she had no idea which way to go. She’d been escorted everywhere the night before, and had not been given any kind of tour. The hall ran a long ways in both directions and disappeared into turns as far as she could see. She decided to head in the same direction they had led her the night before, toward Prince Ursad’s—Lotinar’s—chambers.
As she proceeded, her lips slipped into a smile. She couldn’t believe of all the people or faery that she’d met, Ursad was the Prince here. Prince of the entire Northern Realm of Faerie, no less! She thoughtfully licked her lips. He’d turned out to be quite some eye candy for sure. Too bad she had one too many interested guys on the bandwagon already. She wasn’t really ready to choose anyone, though; there had been too much going on to really worry about boys. She had her magic lessons with Ilarial and Braelynn, fight training with Than and Soap and now this little negotiation meeting to please the Prince of the Northern Realm. Ursad was cool, but his magic tricks and lies had put him on the naughty list for her. Right now, Soap was probably the only one not getting on her last nerve.
Shade reached a turn at the end of the hall and followed it until it opened up to a set of stairs which appeared familiar. She wasn’t sure if they were the same she’d used before, but she figured it couldn’t hurt to keep going, so she descended the steps to the bottom floor.
The castle was eerily deserted. Maybe it was just she expected more people to be scurrying about in such a large place—servants, workers… someone. She turned to her right where she heard some murmurs of voices. She walked along the hall, studying the intricate woodcarvings and random paintings of landscapes, scenes of forests, mountains, streams and other places she’d never seen. They were wondrous and must have been painted by very skilled hands.
She stopped, admiring one painting of a woman standing at the edge of a forest clearing, clearly watching a raging forest fire far in the distance. Her face was forlorn and lost. Her honey brown hair flowed down her back and over her shoulders in waves. She wore a fey warrior’s leather outfit strung with daggers, a pack on her back, and a sword fastened in a hilt to her side. One of her hands gripped the trunk of the tree she stood by. Shade felt lost in her face. A feeling of dread and familiarity washed over her.
She wondered who the woman in the painting was and what was in the distant fire, deep in the forest, which was causing her so much turmoil. Most of all, Shade wondered why she looked so familiar. She could be my sister!
She was still staring at the painting when she felt eyes boring into her back. She whirled around to find Dylan standing silently behind her.
“Geez, do you have to give me a heart attack? What are you doing standing there like a ghost?” Shade hissed as she rolled her eyes and turned back to the painting, not wanting to let the woman’s face go.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to ‘give you an attack.’ Really. I thought you might be wandering the palace when I didn’t find you in your room.” He shuffled up next to her, staring at the painting along with her. “It’s called Ash and Embers.” Shade turned and stared at him. He didn’t turn to her, but continued to study the woman’s painted face.
“How do you know?” she asked.
Dylan nodded. “I have seen this faery’s work many times. It was painted about three hundred years ago by the Oracle Niara. She chose to wither and faded not long after she completed this and a few other paintings. She was definitely a strong Oracle, but tormented by her visions. She painted what she saw in them. This one, she said, was about a woman who watched a loved one die in a fire that appeared out of nowhere. The ash spewed into the sky like clouds of night, and the rocks cracked with veins of red, molten lava pouring out from the earth like a volcano, where before there were none.”
Shade listened intently, awed by his tale.
“And the woman in the painting, did Niara ever say who she was?” Shade asked.
Dylan tilted his head, drinking in the face of the lady and sighing before he spoke.
“Yes, it was said that Niara called her ‘The Shadow.’ Not sur
e what she meant by that.” Dylan looked over to her and smiled, his brighter mood flowing over her.
“Hmm. That’s actually very interesting. Thanks for telling me.” Shade smiled at him.
He nodded his head toward her. “You’re welcome, Shade.” His shoulder brushed her side and she turned to look at him. His eyes were the dark grey of a storm, and in them she could see that they were filled with words unsaid. She felt her heart flutter like it always did when he looked at her that way.
Her mind flipped back to the garden of the Santiran Fountains where they had kissed. The feel of his lips had been like warm, sweet honey. She could still feel the heat from his breath skimming her cheeks and the pounding of his heart beating against her chest as he held her so tight when he’d zapped the Unseelie soldiers with his power. The bluish fire and lightning electrified them but had done nothing to her but leave her breathless and tingling all over. She wondered what it had meant. The way he’d held her felt like he would never let her go. She remembered how she hadn’t wanted him to let go.
Now he stood here, watching her as her thoughts floated in her mind, waiting for some sort of reaction from her. Shade suddenly felt like she’d neglected their relationship greatly. His haunted eyes drew her into the wells of pain and suffering he held deep inside. She wanted to open him up and draw it all out, make him smile and make him continue to feel happiness in the dreariness of life.
She snapped back into the present and watched Dylan flick his grey eyes away from her and back to the painting. She swallowed and wondered if everything she’d felt had meant something to him. She didn’t have to wait to long for an answer, suddenly feeling his warm, soft fingers lace through her hand, curling and holding it tight. Her hand responded to his grip as she felt his warmth radiate up her arm and fill her with his tingling magic. She’d almost forgotten what it felt like to touch Dylan; it made her body vibrate in response. She missed him, in more ways than one.
