I should have told her I knew from the start.
Like it would make any difference now.
Clint rapped the tabletop with his gnarled knuckles, dragging Sebastian’s attention back to the game.
“Your move,” Clint said, head tilted as though he had been studying Sebastian for some time.
“Getting there. What’s the hurry?”
“You’ve been somewhere else since you walked in, bud. What’s the deal?”
Sebastian blew out a sigh and leaned back in the chair, drained.
“You know what, Clint? Maybe we should call the game now. I’m not in the mood to play today. I’m just not feeling it.”
“Yeah, I picked up on that. First of all, you don’t usually drop by on weekends, and second, the minute you walked in the door I figured something was up. So do you want to talk about it or what? I’m betting it has to do with the dinner, so spill.”
Sebastian looked away, already uncomfortable about discussing Alexandra with anyone. Her personal life was her business, and he was not in any hurry to tell anyone else about what had happened between them, or where he left it.
Clint scratched his shiny head, looking at Sebastian curiously. “Well, buddy, I’m no psychic, that’s for damn sure. I can’t read your mind, so either spill it or let’s watch some TV or something.”
Clint grinned and shook his head. For some reason, it reminded Sebastian that he could talk to Clint about anything. The man was a vault, except perhaps with Beth, and maybe it was time to bounce some ideas off him, in spite how complicated and embarrassing the whole story would probably sound.
“All right,” Sebastian said slowly. “This stays here. Got that?”
Clint leaned forward. “That goes without saying, Bash. Fire away.”
Sebastian started at the beginning, from the day he left Clint’s place and spotted what he thought was a teenager sitting out front of Max Storme’s house. He spared no details, even admitting that he allowed Alexandra to wade around in her own incorrect assumptions that he was gay. Just as he thought, laying out the chain of events was embarrassing as hell, especially when the burly tattooed firefighter laughed his ass off as Sebastian related some of the unusual incidents. Yet, it was also cathartic to let it out. Clint listened patiently without interrupting until Sebastian was done.
Clint leaned back in his chair with a thoughtful expression. “Okay. This is where you’re at now. So, what do you hope to gain out of this?”
Sebastian shrugged and scratched his head. “I don’t know. At first I just wanted to get to know her. I could see us being friends at one point, but after where I left it yesterday, I’m doubtful there’s anything either of us can gain if she’s doing the Lexxi Rock routine. I…I just won’t.”
“Sounds like you got that, but it doesn’t look like you’re too happy about the way things are now.”
“Of course I’m not happy, but what choice do I have?”
“Let me ask the question another way. Why aren’t you pushing harder for what you really want?”
Clint studied Sebastian’s face with a knowing look. He rolled away from the chess table and out of the room.
“Do you need some help?” Sebastian called out when he heard Clint in the kitchen rummaging around in the fridge.
Clint still didn’t answer. He came back into the living room with two beers, and passed one to Sebastian. With a casual and relaxed tone of voice, Clint told him, “First off, you have some luck working for you man, getting a second chance with your high school crush like that. Fate saw fit to give you both a chance to make something happen, but you both blew it. I don’t know Lexxi Rock, but as far as I’m concerned, you let her walk right out the door, Bash. In fact, it sounds like you just about booted her out.” Clint paused and shook his head. “It sucks, but it’s not over yet…She’s still in town, isn’t she?”
“I think so.”
“So see her in person and apologize. You’re not yourself, bud. You’re used to taking what you want. That’s the Bash I know. So go, tell her you’re sorry for acting like a dumbass. Ask her how she feels, and then tell her you want her. End of story.”
“She’s back to being a celebrity,” Sebastian answered. “I’m not sure I want in on the life she’s going back to.”
“If I’m not mistaken, and I’m not, aren’t you the dude who told me they’re no different from us?” Clint lifted his beer to Sebastian, winked, and twisted his lips in a half-smile as he waited for an answer.
“Yeah, sure. We’re all just people, but this situation is different. Let’s say Alexandra and I give this a try. Now, we’ve got to try and maintain a relationship from opposite sides of the country. Not to mention, I’m pretty much restricted from traveling until I find out what’s going to happen with this knee.”
“When’s your surgery?”
“On Monday,” he said tersely, already dreading the idea of both undergoing surgery and leaving the same-day facility to come home to recover alone. Alexandra would not have been there for him anyway, he told himself. It was another reminder that he had closed himself off from mostly everyone else since he made room for Alex Roberts. He started to wonder about one what-if scenario in particular.
What if Alexandra and I really could have a go at it?
“You mean tomorrow?”
“Yeah.”
“Does she know about your surgery?” Clint asked, as if reading his mind.
“I think I mentioned it in passing.”
“Speaking of which, who’s picking you up after the procedure?”
“No one. I was planning to drive there and back.”
“Don’t you know you can’t do that? If they plan to put you under anesthesia for day surgery, they won’t release you unless someone picks you up. I’ll get Beth to drop you off and pick you up after.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“I know. I want to.”
“Well. Okay, thanks Clint.”
“It’s no trouble at all.” Clint shrugged. “I still can’t stand to see you let that woman leave town without setting things right. It’s all through her music, the rough time she’s had with heartbreak. People love her for that…she’s relatable. You should at least try. It’ll do you both some good to know what it’s like to be loved.”
“I didn’t say anything about love,” Sebastian muttered.
Clint rolled his eyes. “Yeah…you didn’t have to. It’s plain as day. Anyhow, you should listen to some of her songs. Actually, I’ll text you the link to the ones I bought. Spend some cash. Hear what she has to say in her music.”
He shook his head and took a swig of his beer. “That’s quite all right.” The truth was, Sebastian was not sure he was ready to hear Lexxi Rock being raw and honest in her music after she was so guarded and unreal with him. “Don’t worry about it, man. Listen, I’ll figure it out. At the end of the day, being friends was good while it lasted. It’s just one of those things.”
Clint conceded with another shrug. “It’s your life, buddy. I’ve just never seen you act this way…after all the two of you went through, don’t you think it’s something worth keeping? I mean, that’s all Beth and I had at one time. She’s my best friend in the world, before romance or anything else. Who else would put up with a moody old fart like me?”
“True, I guess.”
* * *
Sebastian heard the house phone ring when he walked into his house. Swooping up the cordless phone, he placed it beside his ear.
“Hello?”
“You’re impossible to pin down, Sebastian Sullivan.”
“Hi there, Chief,” he answered, only just remembering his boss wanted to speak with him since the night of the fire at Max’s house. It had slipped his mind, like many other things had lately. “Sorry about that. What can I do for you?”
“This is off the record, Sullivan. I’ve been reviewing your files on that knee injury.”
“Oh, okay. Is there a problem?”
; “I don’t know yet. I have a friend keeping an eye on it. The team needs you, Sullivan. You know that. You’re one of my best guys, and we all want to see you back out here.”
“You and me both, sir. I’m not used to having all this free time. So, what’s it looking like? How soon can I get back in the game?”
“As soon as you’re done with the surgery, there’s some more physical therapy, and after that, all you have to do is pass the physical. That’s the part you need to worry about, Sullivan.”
“Uh-oh.” Sebastian knew what he meant, but he was ready to do what it took to pass that physical test so he could be back at work. Nothing kept him as clear-headed as responding to a fire. He missed it, and it was exactly what he needed so he could get this crazy ordeal with Alexandra out of his system.
“In my experience, that knee injury is nothing to play around with. You know how rigorous our physical exam is. You’ll need to duck walk on that knee, remember?”
“Yeah. That was intense.” Doubt began to claw down his spine at the thought of trying to force his injured joint through the grueling tests that many healthy men and women had a hard time getting through. He swallowed nervously. “Are you trying to tell me something more, Chief?”
“I have faith in you, Sullivan. You just have to consider that less than eleven percent of firefighters return to the job after an injury like yours. If I were you, I would want to have some other options, just in case.”
Sebastian threw a hand up to the wall beside the phone stand, shaking his head. “I’m a fighter, Chief. You already know that. I’m sure I can make a comeback.”
“That’s the spirit, son. I’m rooting for you to do just that. All the best on your surgery next week. You take care.”
He hung up, still leaning on the shadowy hallway wall, staring down at the phone.
Eleven percent. Those odds suck.
It never occurred to him there was a chance he couldn’t go back to work. Steeling his jaw, he shoved back the possibility. He was ready for that fight. He would focus, dedicate himself to his recovery, and discipline his mind and body to pass the physical and get back on the job.
Chapter 15
ALEXANDRA did not want to admit it, but Eva’s suggestion about apologizing to Bash made sense. She told Eva everything that had happened, and now, she was not too impressed her bestie had sided with Bash. Not one bit.
Eva brought two mugs of hot tea over to the living room sofa. Sitting beside Alexandra, she told her, “If you don’t apologize, I’m going to go to his house and apologize for you.”
Alexandra took the mug Eva offered, and looked up at her. “You wouldn’t.”
“You should know me well enough to know not to dare me, Lex. Think about it. Hasn’t Sebastian been through enough, putting up with your game for a month? He probably sees this Lexxi costume as the same damn thing you did as Alex Roberts, except it’s with an ultra-sexy, super-feminine twist. Do you really have to keep this up?”
“Rick doesn’t think the timing is good to change up my look yet,” Alexandra answered, taking a sip from the steaming cup.
“I don’t remember the last time you did exactly what Rick told you to do. What’s really going on here?”
“I don’t know, but I’m not happy you’re taking Bash’s side. You barely know him.”
“I know enough. He sounds like he’s only been sweet to you, and up to now, I haven’t heard you mention a single nice thing you’ve done for him.”
Alexandra’s back was up. She turned to look at Eva, eyes narrowed. “I’ve been nice to him.”
“You have?”
“Sure.”
“How?”
“I…uh, um…well I…dammit, I hate it when you’re right.”
“I’m right a lot, these days, Lex. That’s pretty sad. You can’t even think of one thing. It sounds like you’ve been one selfish little wench for the last month. Even as a friend. It’s no wonder he prefers to leave well enough alone.”
“Rub it in, why don’t you.”
Eva put down her teacup and put an arm over Alexandra’s shoulder.
“That’s what besties are for, love. I hate to break it to you, but you’ve made your friendship with Bash a really one-sided interaction. It’s time we fix that.”
“Fix it? He won’t even talk to me.”
“Don’t give me that drivel, darling. You haven’t phoned him since you got here last night.”
“Christ. Okay what are you suggesting I do?”
“I don’t know precisely. I just know you need to turn things around, or at least try. Plus, you’re the one who knows him. What would he like?”
Alexandra shrugged. “Heck if I know.”
“God, you’re being a pain, Lex. Think about it. There has to be something he mentioned.”
Alexandra thought hard. “Well, he likes gaming. Maybe I can get him a new videogame.”
“No. Too impersonal. What else?”
“Hmmm…he did tell me a little about a model train set his father left in the basement. I can get him a train accessory.”
“Really, Lex? How lame is that? Besides, just because he’s kept up his Dad’s hobby, doesn’t mean he loves it too. Come on, think. What’s going on in his life?”
“He’s been off work for a while.”
“How come?”
“He mentioned a knee injury. I think he’s going in for surgery soon.”
“How soon?”
“Tomorrow, I think.”
“Does he have any family to help him during the recovery?”
“He has a brother. Samuel.”
Eva raised her eyebrows. “Is he hot?”
“Probably. I think he’s married with kids out in Los Angeles.”
“That’s too bad. For me, anyway. Anyhow, if he has no family out here, that means he’ll be on his own after his surgery.”
“He has his firefighter friends.”
“Are you listening to yourself right now? Do you even care about him at all?”
“Of course I do, Eva.”
“Then act like it. Give him a call. Apologize and offer to take him to wherever his surgery will be. Be there for him. Even if it’s a few days. The least you can do is make the offer. Tell him it’s to thank him for how freaking amazing he’s been to you this past month, you ungrateful trollop.”
Both Eva and Alexandra laughed at her last comment.
“Okay, I’ll call him.”
“When?”
“Later.”
Eva glared at her. “No, Lex. If he’s going in for surgery tomorrow, you need to call him now. Now stop stalling before you lose him.”
Alexandra put her mug down on the coffee table and stood up. “You know what? I’ll do one better. I have to meet the contractor at Dad’s house to give him a set of keys and a deposit for the repairs. I’ll stop by and see Bash.”
“That’s the spirit. If all goes well he’ll rock your world again,” she said with a wink.
Alexandra laughed. She hoped so too. “Okay I’d better get dressed.”
“What are you planning to wear?”
“Something casual. Maybe a sundress.”
“Good. Wait a minute. Please don’t tell me you’ll go over there with that purple hair. It’s gorgeous and everything, but I think it has a time and place…like on stage or at a photo op.”
“I don’t know, Eva…”
“Trust me. Clearly you need to listen to someone else for once. No offense, honey, but look at the mess you made trusting your own judgment…”
“Way to kick a dog when she’s down.”
“Come on, lovey. You know I mean well. Just think about it, okay?”
“All right,” Alexandra said, turning so she could retreat to the front door of Eva’s hotel suite. “I’ll be down the hall in my suite. Talk to you later, hun.”
* * *
Alexandra held her breath after knocking on the front door at Bash’s house. Now that she stood there, she wished she had phoned him
first. She had no idea what she would say to him or how he would react. Worst of all, her body was already on edge and in anticipation. She craved his touch like nothing else.
The door pulled open, and Bash stood there looking at her.
“Hi,” she managed to get out.
“Hey. You look different today.”
Alexandra smiled at the remark. She had gone over without the purple hair, as Eva suggested, and with barely any makeup on, but was not in her Alex Roberts clothes. Instead, she wore a white, sleeveless mock neck top and blue skinny jeans, with a simple pair of diamond earrings in a white gold setting. The only hint of her Alex days was her tousled, raven hair. At this length, there wasn’t much she could do to style it.
“Thanks.”
“Is this another look?”
“Not really. Just me…So, I was next door with the contractor, and figured I would stop by to see how you’re doing, if you’re not busy.”
“That’s nice. Sure,” Bash told her, stepping aside to let her in. “Come on in. I was just cleaning up after dinner. Have you eaten?”
“Um, yes.”
“Okay. I’ve got leftovers if you’re hungry.”
“I’m good, thanks.”
“All right,” he said, leading her to the living room. “Let’s sit in here.”
Alexandra took a seat beside him in the sofa and turned toward him. He looked so good in the simple t-shirt and jeans he was wearing, and God, he smelled amazing. Struggling to find something to say, she went with, “How are you doing?”
“Me? I’m good. How about you?”
“I’m okay.” She was not ready to get into her real reason for being there just yet, so she filled the silence with small talk. “The contractor is starting on the repairs tomorrow, so that’s one thing out of the way.”
“Good to hear. Who did you end up picking?”
“Fisher Construction.”
“They’re pretty good. Nice choice. Did they say how long it would be?”
“Probably a month, realistically. Dad’s going to stay with Rosa when he’s released. She lives on the other side of town, so he’ll come by to check up on them every few days.”
HERO (The Complete Series) Page 55
