A moment later, Wilkes settled on the couch next to her with two drinks in hand, a curious glint in his stare. She could tell his tentative look probably had to do with the fact that he was surprised this was happening. Heck, she was surprised too, and had no idea how to cut it short.
I don’t even know why I’m here.
“Have a drink, Lex. You’ll feel better.” He sipped from his drink, not breaking his gaze from her for even a second. “I think I need to say this so you don’t think the worst of me, or yourself. This is not some sort of a booty call.”
Picking up the drink he made her—a wine glass with pinot noir, which he knew was her favorite—she downed a long gulp and crossed her legs. She ran a hand through the loose black curls that spilled into her eyes, then relaxed her elbow on side of the sofa, studying him.
Sighing, she gave talking it out a try. “I used to enjoy spending time in this room with you, you know?” The words pelted out to her amazement, because they weren’t what she was going to say. Still, the statement hit the nail on the head. It was true. What they had was in the past. He was also correct, that they had not put the end of the relationship to rest. This was the real goodbye, at least it was for Alexandra.
“I miss being around here too.”
“I don’t want a lonely or empty relationship, Wilkes.”
That was the truth. She didn’t want to be lonely anymore. She gnawed on her bottom lip and closed her eyes. “Why did we keep each other at such a distance? I have so much…so much…something inside of me that I wish I could just set free. Emotions, feelings, just something. It was bottled up while we were together.”
He cast a lovesick look in her direction. “I can’t change what I did in the past. All I can control is now. Right now there’s something between us. Something bigger than what was there before. Look at me, Lex.” She turned to him again. “I’m so in love with you, it’s not going to change overnight.”
Alexandra scoffed. “You’re not in love with me, Wilkes. You’re used to winning, and not used to being told no.”
He shook his head and sat next to her on the sofa, squaring his shoulders. “Regardless of what you think, Lexxi, if I say I’m in love with you, you can bet your last dollar it’s the truth.”
“Fine, Wilkes. You’re in love with me. The issue is I’m in love with Bash.”
“Then give him a try. Give him a try tomorrow, but don’t ignore what’s happening between us right now. This is only going to resolve itself if you face up to it.” Wilkes slipped from the couch to sit on the floor at her feet, staring up at her. His gaze roamed over every detail of her face, like he was committing this moment to memory as a way of saying goodbye. For the first time, it felt like the bastard might not be lying. He may have actually been here to let her go tonight.
Her pulse quickened at the thought, realizing there were worse things than having her heart broken—because there was something better on the horizon, someone who loved her and wouldn’t hurt her the way Wilkes had. Wilkes may have been acting like he wanted her to give him another try, but maybe this was also his way to make amends and end on a good note. He had spent weeks trying to prove to her he was a changed man, and she had assumed he was doing it in the hopes she would see something about him worth salvaging. Now she wasn’t so sure. Maybe he needed to do this to move on too. Maybe she did too.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked, patting her knee and looking up at her. She shook her head, not wanting to say anything more. A questioning look arose on Wilkes’ face as he studied her. “If this is our real goodbye, just know I’ll hurt like hell if you let me go without holding you.” He placed a tender hand on her cheek and Alexandra suddenly felt like she was about to cross the point of no return. “Lexxi…” Her name spilled from his lips in a whisper.
She closed her eyes just as his lips press against hers. The spark of arousal that flared when they kissed at the door lit up again, this time brighter and more potent than before. She took her time and explored it, experienced the moment. She was aware of the scent of his cologne, the soapy, clean smell of his skin, and his unique masculine scent that definitely reach her consciousness.
His hard planes met her softness when she eased down from the chair until she was straddling his lap, wrapping her arms around his wide shoulders. She felt his heat, heard the rapid intake of air in his lungs, felt his heart pounding on her chest.
She tried not to think about Bash. This wasn’t about Bash. This was about letting go of Wilkes and being whole again.
Or is it?
Wilkes repositioned her against his body with a shift of his hips, sending a zing of awareness through her. She shivered in his embrace. Her heart was pounding faster too. He groaned lightly into her mouth and glided a hand up the back of her neck. He tangled his fingers in her hair and he cupped the back of her head. Slanting his mouth against hers, his other hand caressed the curve of her ass. His hips eased forward again, the hardness of his manhood probing at her through their clothes. She gasped, and Wilkes gripped her at her neck, holding her in the kiss.
His chest heaved.
Wilkes held her in his powerful arms and easily got to his feet, her legs still wrapped around his waist. A surge of need grew within her when he carried her over to the large sectional couch and stretched her out on it to remove her blazer. She shucked it off, but as he slipped his hands under her tank top and slowly reached up to just below her tender breasts, she began to feel a greater sense of loss. His lips skated down the side of her neck and his hands danced at the lacy part of her bra against her skin, and when he ground his obviously rigid erection against her hips, she felt herself slipping further and further away from Bash with every touch. It couldn’t go on.
She pulled away and struggled to sit up. “This is where our sweet goodbye needs to wrap up.”
Wilkes sat up and gazed at her. “What?” All she did was look at him, and his expression changed. “Of course. You’re right,” he said, pulling himself together enough to move to the end of the sofa again. He adjusted his pants, at a loss for what to do now that she had put the brakes on what was about to be a mad dash to completion.
Or was that supposed to be closure?
Or final consummation?
Fuck. I really screwed up.
She was still tingling in areas that had nothing to do with her heart, but stopping here was the right decision. No, stopping at the restaurant would have been the right decision.
Wilkes cleared his throat. “Well, it’s late and I can tell I’ve overstayed my welcome.”
Alexandra nodded. She got up and picked up her blazer, pulled it back on, and walked him to the door. He stepped outside into the humid late night air, and looked toward the driveway. His limo was no longer there.
“Where did your driver go?”
“I’m not sure. He should know to wait. Let me call his cell.” He felt around in his pockets for his smartphone. “My phone…can you check and see if it slipped out of my pockets inside?”
“Sure,” she answered, retracing her steps to the sitting room. She checked every corner of the sofa and sectional. It wasn’t there. It wasn’t at the bar either. She returned to the front door to see if he had found it. “Any luck?”
“No,” he answered, still patting down every pocket in his pants. “I don’t have my house keys either. You didn’t see anything inside?”
“No. Maybe it’s in the back of the limo. I can look up his number online if that’ll help?”
“I don’t remember his information. You know what? Phone Rick. I got this service through one of his referrals. I’d tell you to call me a cab, but I need my keys to get in tonight.”
“Okay…well come on in and have a seat. I’ll try Rick.”
For the first time in years, Rick didn’t take Alexandra’s call. She left him a message, and while they waited for him to call back, Wilkes phoned his sister. If she had made it back home, he could have taken a taxi and she could let him in. Emma-Jane an
swered, but had ended up at a sleepover.
“I can take a cab to you for the keys, Emma-Jane,” Wilkes told her on speakerphone.
“No you can’t do that,” she whispered. “Sherry’s dad would kill her if you show up, even if you’re famous. They’re really strict.”
“All right.”
“Can I talk to Lexxi?”
“Now? Why didn’t you just come to dinner like we planned?”
“Sorry.”
“I’m here, Emma-Jane,” Alexandra said from beside Wilkes.
“Hi Lexxi. I’m sorry about tonight. I got a little sidetracked with my friend at the mall.”
Didn’t we all.
“It’s okay. Another time, but just you and me, all right?”
“Great. Thanks. I’d better go now. Good night.”
Wilkes hung up.
Alexandra couldn’t believe she was doing this. “I’ll get you some blankets. You can sleep on the sectional tonight. If Rick phones back overnight—”
“I know. I’ll be out of your hair. I’m sorry. I really didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“It’s okay,” she mumbled.
“Thanks…for the couch. I owe you.”
She rolled her eyes, heading out of the room. “I’ll be back with the blankets and a few pillows.”
He shouted out to her, “If you find any of the stuff I used to wear over here while you’re upstairs, can you bring me a sweatpants or something?”
Crap.
She had been so busy when she got back from Tucson, she never went through the drawers where Wilkes kept his things. Maybe it was a good thing he ended up here tonight. Well, not really, but she could purge the place of Wilkes’ stuff.
Just in time for Bash’s visit this weekend.
God, that sounded so damned awful.
She returned with linens, a couple of pillows, and one of the t-shirts and sweatpants he had left behind. Wilkes was really still in the game, stripping off his shirt in front of her, exposing his tanned, chiseled chest before he threw on the t-shirt. She turned to leave. This was too much.
“Stay with me,” Wilkes whispered.
“It’s not a good idea, Wilkes and you know it.”
“Look at the size of this sectional couch, Lex. It’s big enough for half a dozen people to camp out on.”
“I need to sleep in my own bed.”
“Please. I promise, I’ll sleep over here, and you can sleep over there. I won’t so much as breathe in your direction.”
“Sorry Wilkes. I’ve already gone way too far. Good night.”
Heading back upstairs, Alexandra let out a long breath. She got to her room and slipped out of her clothes, throwing a large t-shirt on before climbing into bed. She tugged the light covers up over her shoulders and closed her eyes.
I hope Bash will forgive me.
That was the last thing she thought of before she fell asleep.
Chapter 14
ALEXANDRA woke up in a strange orientation in her bed. In a panic, she tossed off the covers and gaze around until her groggy brain recalled what had happened last night.
Shit.
Wilkes is downstairs in my sitting room.
Her yawn morphed into a perplexed frown. Then, everything from the night before flooded back. Groaning, she clutched her head and checked her phone. Rick had sent her a text with the limo service contact information at some point last night. She threw on a robe, phoned the service and requested they send Wilkes’ driver from last night before she headed downstairs to get Wilkes out of her house.
He was still asleep, from the sounds of his gurgling snore she heard from the entryway. She stared across the couch to see a bare-chested Wilkes, sprawled out in a rumpled pile of blankets.
Where did his t-shirt go?
She didn’t want to know.
He looked younger as he slept there, oblivious to her. His hair fell across his boyish face, making it somewhat easy to forget this was the same man who had made her want to claw his eyes out after he cheated on her.
As she looked over at him, it was not too hard to piece together the reasons last night went as far as it did. There was some type of imbalance in their relationship, some point where she felt she had to mute her own passion to satisfy him, at the cost of her own happiness. That was the point where their relationship failed, not when Wilkes’ cheated. That was what made it hurt so much more when he ended up in bed with Lydia. What Wilkes was hoping for last night was just another repeat of the six months they had been together. Whether or not Wilkes could ever realize that, it didn’t matter anymore. He may have really turned a new leaf, but the truth was he would have to find someone else to share the new and improved version of himself with. They were no longer meant to be together. They probably never were.
“What have I done?” she whispered with growing uneasiness. She allowed a kiss that almost led God knows where. Thank goodness she found the emergency brake when she did. Now, she needed him gone.
Scrunching her nose, she called out to him. “Wilkes.”
Still sleeping, he groaned, sleepily moving his head before clutching the pillow tighter with an incoherent mumble. He had always been a deep sleeper. Quickly, she stepped around to the back of the sectional and shook his shoulder.
“Wilkes. Your limo will be here soon. Get up. You need to leave.”
A glance at her phone showed her it was still early, the perfect time for him to be gone without getting any unwanted attention from the usual with telephoto-lens-carrying paparazzi who would kill for something this juicy. She shook his shoulders again and he slowly woke up.
“Hey,” he groaned, opening his eyes and looking around.
“Get dressed, Wilkes.” She left the sitting room and headed to the kitchen to put some coffee on. She looked out the front door on her way back to him. The limo had arrived. With any luck, his phone and keys would be in the back.
Wilkes stepped out of the powder room when she returned. She was grateful he had dressed again and would be out of her hair finally. “Thanks for letting me stay on your couch.”
“It’s fine,” she told him, pulling her robe more tightly around her. “Your limo’s outside.”
“Thanks. I’ll check for my stuff.” He walked toward the door, then turned back to her. “Need a ride into work?”
She shook her head. “No, you go ahead. Thanks.”
He should have been heading out the door, but instead he closed in on her. “I’m sorry about everything, Lex,” he said, reaching his arm out to cup one cheek.
She stepped back, out of his reach. “It’s fine.”
“It’s damned hard to not to kiss you right now.”
“Wilkes…”
“I know. I know, Lex. I wish you and Bash the best. Have a good day.”
“Bye Wilkes.” Alexandra followed him to the door, and watched as he hurried down the steps and disappeared head first into the limo. He stood up a moment later, shaking around his phone and keys in his hand. He had left them in the back seat. With a wave, he was back inside. The vehicle turned around in the driveway and headed toward the gate, taillights growing fainter as she stared after him.
The front gate did not close automatically as Wilkes’ limo drove out. A flash of light. Then another. Then a few more.
“Shit,” she muttered.
The paparazzi.
More than one, and oh crap, Wilkes’ limo was slowing down? Soon there were three or four microphones pointed at the back window.
“He’d better not add any fuel to the fire,” she growled, shutting her front door.
Knowing Wilkes, he’d blow it out of proportion. This was the last thing Alexandra needed. She rushed upstairs to phone Bash. In case anything came of it, she needed him to hear it from her first. She closed her eyes, painfully pulling together something to say as she waited for Bash to answer. The call went to voice mail. Letting out a long breath, she went to shower and dress for what would be a long day.
Chapter 15
>
SEBASTIAN was cautious when he entered the physical therapy center for his appointment. He approached the desk and requested his usual therapist. Mike was not there, and he was assigned to Kennedy again. Knowing he was about to be pseudo-stalked again made the task of enduring the session more unbearable. Had the tables been turned and this were happening to a woman, the strong recommendation would have been to report it. Sebastian didn’t want to be responsible for anyone being put out of a job, so he decided to ignore it.
Today, he had made it through her flirtatious overtures without opening his mouth to say a word. The only time he had to draw the line was in the electronic pulse massager room. He told her if she tried anything, that would be it. She went on to tell him she couldn’t get over his ‘moves’.
Fuck.
She’s never going to stop.
“This is the last couple of sessions for you, Bash,” Kennedy murmured before leaving him in peace. He breathed an inward sigh of relief. Soon this would be over and he could take the firefighter’s fitness test, and learn his fate.
He glanced at the television in the corner as the massager did its work. A soccer game was playing, until another patient came in to use the second machine on the other side of the room. He changed the channel to entertainment news. Sebastian groaned aloud at the irony of seeing Lexxi Rock flash across the screen.
My woman.
He smiled softly and looked on, drawn in by the bright colors framing the entertainment news desk. He was about to relax his head on the backrest when the news anchor became more animated. The volume was turned down, but there was enough sound to get the odd word in. Images flashed of Lexxi, first with her purple hair, along with news about her soon to be released album. Bash did a double take when more pictures showed Alexandra looking like Alex Roberts. The purple hair was gone, replaced by the soft black curls he was familiar with. Her petite form was hugged by a pantsuit cropped below the knees, with a white t-shirt and form-fitting black blazer. Her bright blue loafers made him smile a little. The glamorous makeup from the earlier pictures was replaced by nude lipstick and a natural face. She looked great.
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