by Bijou Hunter
Desperate to leave, I paced to the door. Bailey stood behind me and the will of her personality kept me from turning the knob. I looked into her beautiful blue eyes and forced out the truth.
“I hate thunderstorms,” I said and she nodded like she understood, but I knew she didn’t. “I get tense in them. I can’t relax and I don’t want to ruin your night.”
“I don’t care if you’re tense. I want you to stay.”
Taking her face in my hands, I was barely able to breathe as the storm approached.
“As a kid, I hid during thunderstorms. I couldn’t think or talk to anyone. I still get scared. Do you get it? I can’t be your boyfriend and watch a movie. I’m like a fucking baby, needing to hide in the fucking corner and wait for the storm to pass. When the thunder and lightning really kicks in… Acting like that at my place doesn’t make me feel like such a loser, but here with you…”
“I don’t care,” she said, caressing my hands which still held her face. “I want to be with you, Nick. I have a lot of ideas about what can happen between us. Big things like being together forever. You always run though. You pull away and put up these walls. I don’t care though. Not about you being scared or needing to sit in a corner. I want to love you. I think I really can and that means I need to accept everything about you. Not just Dragon or nice guy Nick. I accept that you come with baggage from your fucked up childhood. You accept my baggage and I didn’t even have a bad childhood. I had everything and I still get weird. Let me accept even the stuff you don’t like about yourself.”
“I’m a grown man,” I said, frustrated to show her weakness. “I know the damn thunderstorm isn’t going to hurt me”
“That’s not true. They kill people every year.”
“Bailey…”
“Am I just a hot girl you want to bang or do you think we could be more?”
“You know you’re more to me.”
“Then let me see the real you. If I am going to be an asshole about your hang-ups, why not get the whole thing out of the way and not waste time? I know I won’t and I want you to know too.”
Kissing her softly, I relaxed in her familiar taste and embrace. I wanted to stay with her. Where else would feel as good as with my girl? I just didn’t want to look like a pussy in front of woman who grew up surrounded by badasses.
“When I was a kid,” I said quietly, “the storms were so loud and the whole trailer would shake like it was going to be torn apart. I’d see other people getting ready for the storms. They’d keep their kids close, but I was alone most of the time. I would hide in the closet and wait for the storm to end. Even now, I feel like I’m back there.”
“It’s PTSD,” she said, tugging me away from the door and to the living room. “You’re reliving a trauma. My shrink told me about it when I asked her about Tawny’s issues. Like how she and Farah can get really weird when a lot of bikers are around. They know Cooper and Judd would never let anything happen to them, but they still get jittery. They aren’t fully in the present, Dr. Dee said. That’s your problem too. You hear the thunder and you’re back in the trailer as a scared little boy. No rational thinking is gonna convince you otherwise.”
“I’m sorry.”
Bailey gave me a soft smile. “For having shitty parents? That’s not your fault anymore than I deserve good ones. It was the luck of the draw. You did get lucky by meeting me because I’m super smart and sensitive and all.”
“You are sensitive,” I said, running my fingers along the seam of her pale blue tee.
When Bailey squirmed under my touch, I loved the look in her eyes. Something between lust and love.
Reaching for her, I stopped when thunder shook the apartment. My skin broke out in heat and I ran my hands through my hair instead of touching her.
“This is a good corner,” she said softly, moving to the counter overhang. “The wall isn’t an outside one and doesn’t shake as much as the others. It’s a good corner to sit in.”
“Bailey,” I muttered, wishing to leave so she wouldn’t see me afraid like a child.
“Sit down here and I’ll put on a movie. I’ll sit on the couch and we’ll be together. That’s better than you driving home in the storm and being alone.”
Giving up, I dropped on my ass with a thump while Bailey knelt in front of me. “Take off your shoes so I know you won’t leave. I feel needy, but don’t hold that against me, okay? You still like me even though I’m messed up and stuff, right?”
I smiled. “You’re not what I thought,” I said and she instantly assumed the worst. “You’re better in every way.”
“That’s true,” Bailey said, covering her insecurity. She stood up and sighed. “I’m going to get a drink. Do you need anything?”
I shook my head while kicking off my shoes. The wind had picked up and now shook everything with a fury. Leaning my head against knees, I focused on the clean scent of the apartment. This wasn’t the dirty trailer and I wasn’t a boy anymore. My dad wouldn’t show up and pound on me. I no longer had to worry about his friends smacking me around either. I was safe with the girl of my dreams who was pointing her butt at me. Enjoying the view, I watched Bailey search her collection of Blu-rays.
When she turned around, I noticed an odd look on her beautiful face.
“I don’t judge you,” she said, walking towards me with a movie behind her back. “Promise you won’t judge me.”
“Why?” I asked, suspicious now.
“This is my favorite movie, but no one knows. It’s my secret and I’m sharing it with you because I trust you. Do you trust me?”
Nodding, I tilted my head to see the movie behind her back. When she kept it hidden, I added, “I promise.”
Bailey sighed and showed me the movie. When I just smiled, she sighed again, sounding relieved this time.
“The Santa Clause?” I said, smiling wider. “You’re sweet.”
“It makes me happy. Whenever I feel down, I watch it and life gets better.”
“Maybe it’ll work for me?”
Smiling at my comment, Bailey hurried to the player. While she set up the movie, I focused on her rather than the storm.
I’d never seen the movie before, but I watched it with the eyes of a child rather than the skeptical eyes of a nineteen year old. It wasn’t difficult whenever I looked at a smiling Bailey. She laughed a lot even though the jokes must be tired after so many viewings. Watching the movie with her, I allowed the scared little boy to enjoy something he might have once found funny.
An hour in, I had joined her on the couch. Every snap of thunder tensed me, but I concentrated on the movie’s sweetness and Bailey’s warm body against mine. By the time the movie was over, I didn’t jump at every crack of thunder. Bailey helped me remain in the present when my past wanted to destroy me. She was much more than I ever dreamed and I needed to make her mine.
Chapter Seventeen ~ Bailey
The storm raged for the rest of the night and into the morning. I loved sleeping when it rained, but Nick remained on edge. Every time I comforted him, he jerked away. If I gave him space, he calmed enough to rest closer to me on the bed.
Whenever I felt insecure about him refusing my touch, I remembered how he whispered my name in his sleep. I also thought about how I’d comforted him the night before without using sex or jokes. I was able to be gentle in a way I normally didn’t have in me.
I woke up later in the morning to find my cold had passed and Nick was gone from the bed. With the heavy winds and rain, I nearly missed the sound of running water.
Opening the door to the shower, I saw Nick scrubbing his already red arms. I turned down the scalding water and started to speak until his expression stopped me.
“I need to be alone.”
I nearly left him to clean his already clean body. Tawny also got in her weird moods where she needed to be alone or only wanted to be around Judd. I understood people like Nick and the Smith sisters were raised fucked up, leaving them with real problems, not i
nsecurities about bra sizes.
I refused to leave Nick though. His happiness was my responsibility, so I stripped out of my nightgown and joined him in the shower.
Nick moved into the corner, trying to hide himself.
“You don’t have to hide from me. I’ve seen your scars.”
“In the Thunderdome. That’s not me. That’s Dragon. I don’t feel like Dragon. I feel…”
Nick couldn’t finish. His expression was filled with such self-loathing that I wanted to hunt down his father and make him pay. Going homicidal wouldn’t help Nick though.
“I never see Dragon,” I said, stepping closer and placed my hands against the long healed scars on his chest. “I always see Nick and you’re the one I want.”
Nick didn’t budge from the corner of the shower. “Even after living here for a year, I can still smell the old trailer. I can never wash it off.”
My fingers slid over the circular scars on his bicep that I suspected were cigarette burn marks. I’d seen one on the back of Winnie’s right hand. She told me that before the Todds saved her she was worth no more than an ashtray.
No one ever saved Nick.
“When I see you,” I said softly, “I don’t see the dirty trailer. When I see your scars, I don’t see a loser. I see strength and goodness. You grew up abused by a monster, yet never became one. That takes courage. You didn’t become a drunk or addict to blind yourself from the pain. That takes strength. You don’t use or destroy people to get what you want. Instead, I always see you helping people at school. One time, I saw you help a woman catch her wild dog. You’re a good man. Strong and brave.”
Leaning into him, I removed the soap from his hands while a haunted Nick stared at me. I looked into the eyes of a lost child wanting to hide from the world.
“You smell like mine,” I said, resting his hands on my wet hips. “You smell like a man who wants me.”
I stroked his hard cock, causing Nick to shudder. His fingers grazed my back up to my shoulders then to my face. I lifted my lips to his and he kissed my breath away. His need uncontrollable, Nick grabbed me under the butt and lifted me against him.
“Bailey,” he muttered, staring into my eyes my body slid up and down against his.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I didn’t know what he wanted. His body needed to fuck. His cock wanted inside me. His heart needed acceptance. What his mind wanted remained a mystery.
“I see you,” I whispered in his ear. “You’re mine in every way and nothing will make me let go.”
Still staring into my eyes, Nick thrust inside my body until he filled me completely. There was questioning in his gaze, but also a challenge. I claimed to want all of him despite his flaws. Was I willing to give him everything?
My answer was to tighten my pussy around his cock. Nick’s hips moved frantically, needing what he denied himself this last week with me. Basking in his hunger, I held onto his slick body and murmured my pleasure in his ear.
Chapter Eighteen ~ Nick
Bailey felt delicate in my arms. Fragile as if I had the power to destroy her. I wanted to do right by her, but I couldn’t stop. My mind blinded by need, I wouldn’t let her go. All my life I needed something to soothe the pain and Bailey offered freedom. How could I let her go? Or tell myself to stop when life gave me nothing for so long?
Carrying Bailey out of the shower, I rested her wet body on the bed.
“You want this,” I said, but my voice made it sound like a question.
“I dreamed of this,” she murmured while running her fingers through my wet hair. “A guy worthy of Free Bird.”
Having no idea what she was talking about, I didn’t care anyway. Her damp skin tasted sweet as I sucked and nipped along every inch of flesh. Noticing Bailey reaching for something, I didn’t care if she took a gun and ended me that very moment. She was my salvation and I couldn’t stop.
Music began to play, but I didn’t recognize it as Skynyrd until I lifted her hips and enjoyed a taste of her wet pussy.
“Oh, shit,” Bailey moaned.
I might have laughed at her frenzied voice if I wasn’t busy devouring her warm flesh. When Bailey’s hips squirmed wildly as I sucked her clit, I held her still and forced her over the edge. She cried out my name like she was falling. I heard panic and pleasure wrapped in one word.
Long after Bailey’s breathing slowed, I explored between her legs, teasing and tasting. My fingers plunged inside her then I used the wetness to test her anus. As I played, Bailey murmured something and her body remained limp. She only squirmed when I nibbled at the spot behind her knee.
Crawling over her, I teased her pussy with my cock. “I’ve only done that once before,” I said, leaning down to kiss her hard nipple. “Did I do it right?”
“Huh?” she muttered as if stoned from a too powerful orgasm.
“I’ll take that as a yes.”
Bailey smiled. “Yes.”
“More?”
Her smile grew. “Much more. Until we can’t think of anything else.”
Grinning, I leaned forward and my cock opened her pussy until I filled her.
“I see you,” she said, holding onto my forearms as I fucked her harder. “And you’re perfect.”
I could only smile as I moved faster and deeper until her expression shifted. I knew she was close and I needed her to come apart.
The look on Bailey’s face as she came sent a shudder through me. I’d never created anything beautiful in my life. My claim to fame was taking a punch. I was often complimented on my dragon tattoo, but that wasn’t my design or talent. With Bailey’s pleasure, I accomplished something divine.
“Nick,” she said again and again until my lips met hers and silenced her with a kiss.
Her arms wrapped around me and didn’t let go until I came hard too. More intense than anything before, I was losing control. As if every level of protection I’d built up over the years threatened to fall in this moment.
Wanting to pull away, I need to guard myself from possible rejection and pain. Bailey refused to let me go. Her grip remained possessive even after I rested next to her.
“You can’t know how good that was,” she whispered, nipping at my lips.
“I do know.”
Bailey frowned at my tone. “Are you upset?”
“No,” I said, feeling dirty again.
The storm still going strong, I flinched at the lightning and thunder. Edgy again, I needed away from Bailey until I felt clean. As if sensing I wanted away from her, she wrapped herself tighter around me.
“Don’t leave,” she whined. “Guys always leave afterwards and I hate that. Even when I hate them, I don’t like getting ditched. If you leave, it’ll break my heart.”
“I’m not leaving,” I said, wiggling free.
“Why are you pulling away?” she mumbled, struggling against me. “Damn boobs are in the way. Don’t go.”
“Bailey,” I said, finally twisting around and breaking free, “I’m not leaving, but I need to breathe.”
“No.”
Bracing her wrists over her head, I kissed Bailey hard until she stopped squirming. When she was docile, I softened my kiss and said, “I’m not leaving.”
“You want to though.”
“No.”
“What do you want? I know you don’t want to cuddle.”
Sighing, I glanced at the bathroom then back at her. She looked delicious with her tits jutting towards me and I was hungry for those hard nipples. Even aroused, I felt dirty next to Bailey’s perfection.
“I need a shower,” I confessed. “It’s not you.”
“I know. I’m amazing.”
As I grinned, my gaze rolled over her sweaty body. “I want you,” I whispered, biting my lip to keep from lowering my mouth to her closest nipple.
“You can have them both,” she said and I thought she meant her tits. “A shower and me. Let’s just take our fun back under the water.”
Releasing her wrists, I sat up.
“I don’t know why I didn’t think of that.”
“My hot body distracted you,” she said, jumping up and running to the bathroom. I found her standing in front of the mirror. “I don’t blame you. These boobs are to die for.”
Pressing my body against hers, my hands covered those lovely boobs and I found her gaze in the mirror.
“I want to be like normal guys, but this is the best I can do.”
Bailey turned around and lowered my forehead to hers. “Normal guys eat shit. You be you and I’ll be happy as long as you stay with me.”
Grinning, I reached over and turned on the water. “I’m not going anywhere,” I promised, kissing her as I lifted her up against me. Soon, the water washed away my past while Bailey kept me pleasured in the present.
Chapter Nineteen ~ Bailey
The storm intensified until the apartment felt under attack. Staring at the ceiling, Nick rested perfectly still next to me. I watched him for a long time without saying anything. A part of me was afraid to upset him. Finally, I couldn’t keep my mouth shut any longer.
“You’re not in that trailer,” I said, scooting closer.
“I know.”
“You’re safe.”
Nick nodded without looking at me.
“Do you want to take a shower?”
“No.”
“Can I do anything besides shut up?”
Nick smiled tightly and reached for my hand. He placed it on his chest and sighed.
“I feel… I just need to wait out the storm. You don’t need to stay up and wait with me.”
“Are you hot?” I asked, thinking about him trapped in the closet during a storm. “Want me to put on the ceiling fan?”
Nick didn’t react for nearly a minute. Finally, he glanced at me in the dark room.
“That might help actually.”
Feeling brilliant, I jumped up and reached for the fan remote. After turning it up to high, I returned to bed. We rested quietly as I built up the courage to ask the question I’d been circling for a while.
“Is your dad a smoker?”
His gaze locked on the ceiling, Nick didn’t react except to say, “Yes.”
