“I owe you big time,” I said as soon as Dad left the room, trying not to squeal.
“Too right you do. Anyway, I better head off. Do me a favour, tel Tammie not to bother me for a few days, okay? I need space.”
“Of course,” I said, but I wondered if they would ever be okay again. Everything had changed.
Once he left, I rang Amelia to tel her what happened. She was predictably excited.
Afterwards, I hesitated when it came to teling Tammie. Things didn’t feel the same anymore. She let me down, and I wasn’t sure if I trusted her. I promised Joey I’d pass on his message, so I took a deep breath and rang her. She sounded subdued when she answered the phone.
“Tams, it’s me. Listen, I spoke to Joey.”
“What did he say?”
“He needs a bit of time away from you, he’s stil pissed, but I explained things so maybe—”
“How much time?” she blurted out, interrupting me.
“Uh, a few days. He’l be at the party, so he’l probably chat to you there.”
She seemed okay with that, but she got off the phone as quickly as possible. There was a distance between us that I didn’t think could ever be bridged. More importantly, I was going to the party. Nathan would be there too. Things were looking up.
Chapter Ten
Thoughts of the party kept me awake at night. First proper house party. Nathan would be there. Something could happen. Maybe. Or I could make a fool of myself.
Likely. At least Amelia would be there. Joey and Tammie would probably sort things out, and I could keep on ignoring the fact he wasn’t as interested in her as she was in him.
School was quiet. Tammie and I were stil tense and awkward around each other, Joey avoided us al, and Amelia had a sore throat.
“Are you going to be up for the party?” I asked Amelia anxiously as she sneezed for the fourth time in a row.
“Sure,” she said, after blowing her nose. “I’l be fine by then.”
By Friday, she could barely speak. I kept my distance at the bus stop after school in case she sneezed on me again. Nathan soon joined us, accompanied by Aaron and Abbi.
“So are you stil going to my party?” Aaron asked me.
“I think so.”
“Is your Dad letting you go?” Abbi said, her voice ful of surprise.
“Yes.” I was a little snappier than I should have been.
“Cool,” Aaron said, beaming. “How about you, Amelia?”
“As long as this cold doesn’t get worse,” she croaked.
Aaron grinned at us. “Don’t forget to bring your own drinks,” he reminded us.
“Should be fun,” Abbi said, smiling at me—I couldn’t bring myself to share her enthusiasm.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” Nathan whispered to me. We walked away from the others and excitement brewed inside me as I wondered what he might say to me.
He shoved his hands in his pockets and avoided my eyes. “Look, I know you and Abbi haven’t been friends in the past, but give her a chance, okay? She’s cool.”
“Um, what?” Seriously?
“I saw how you looked at her just there, she’s trying to be nice to you. I just thought... I’d say something.” He flushed red and walked away. I watched him as he joined the others, wondering if it was Abbi he was interested in. Not even the now familiar sight of a man with red hair watching us from across the street could distract me from that thought.
***
Saturday brought a whole new set of problems. Important ones, like what to wear. I changed outfits numerous times until Gran finaly stepped in to help. Girlifying me was right up her street.
At eight on the dot, Joey and Tammie arrived. Dad looked so grumpy, I said goodbye before he changed his mind.
“Have a wonderful evening.” Gran hugged me close to her. “You look just like your mother,” she whispered in my ear. Maybe that wasn’t helping Dad’s mood.
It was a little awkward for a while with Joey and Tammie. They stil hadn’t sorted things out. Joey kept glancing at Tammie’s legs, so I figured that was a good sign.
Aaron stood in his garden with some of his friends when we arrived. He waved and told us to go on in and get comfortable. It was stil early, not many people had shown up yet, so we were able to grab a seat.
I saw Nathan in the living room and waved him over, looking for Amelia.
“Didn’t she tel you? Our grandmother is making her stay in bed al weekend.”
“Aw, no.” I didn’t simply mean because Amelia was stil sick, I was also dreading the thoughts of being at the party without her. “Should I bring her something?” He shook his head, smiling. “She’l be fine, she’s being spoiled as we speak.” He touched my arm lightly. “I’m glad you came, Perdita. You look nice.” My cheeks flushed pink. Dawn caled him over before I could reply. He roled his eyes.
“I better go see what she wants before she comes over here and wrecks your head. See you in a bit.” He headed over to Dawn who puled him close beside her. I tried to ignore the jealous twinges in my gut.
I was soon bored stiff. The house was filing up, but I sat on the arm of a chair occupied by Tammie and Joey who whispered intently together. Third wheel alert.
When Tammie stood up and announced she was going to speak with Joey in private, I couldn’t help groaning. She ignored me and dragged him upstairs. I watched her go, half-hoping she could sense the hate vibes I sent her way.
For a while I waited for them, sipping a can of coke, watching people dance, and listening to a group of boys exaggerate about a gang of feral dogs running around our estate. I was more interested in the dancing. Nathan and Abbi danced together quite a lot but within a group of people. When Dawn wasn’t throwing me daggers, I was able to watch them unnoticed. People flocked around Nathan while Aaron watched from across the room, scowling whenever his gaze fel upon Nathan.
Watching everyone have a good time together made me ache inside. I wanted to go home. Parties were no fun for people like me. I felt too awkward and out of place, too afraid of making a fool of myself.
“You going to dance or what?” Nathan asked when he stopped to get a drink, his cheeks pink with heat from dancing. I glanced over at Dawn. Her sneer made me shrink back into myself.
“Uh, no. Maybe later.”
I kept checking the stairs to see if Joey and Tammie were coming back. Waiting around for them on my own was mortifying, I must have looked like such a loner.
By ten o’clock, I decided enough was enough, I was going home. I headed outside, passed by a gang of slightly drunk boys unnoticed, and began the walk home.
I passed by the woods and heard a noise that stopped me in my tracks. A low growl behind me. Looking around, I saw nothing on the path. Shivering a little, I kept walking, but a sudden flash of movement to my right had me whirling around in fright. Breathing heavily, I reminded myself it was just an animal, probably a hungry stray dog. I took a deep breath and kneeled down, steeling myself. Peering through the trees, I strained my eyes looking for whatever had growled. If it was the stray dog that kiled the cat outside my door, then maybe I could feed it so it wouldn’t need to kil anything else.
“Here doggy,” I caled.
“What are you doing, Perdita?”
I jumped to my feet with fright. “Oh. Nothing.”
Nathan approached me with a bemused smile on his face.
Blushing, I gestured toward the woods. “I thought I heard a growl. I was trying to get the dog to come out.” He looked in the direction I was pointing. I could have sworn I saw him sniff the air. “There’s nothing there.”
“There was, I swear.”
“I believe you, but it’s gone now.” He said it with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “You’re positive you heard a growl?”
“Oh, yeah. There’s a stray running around, I think. After we bumped into you in the cinema that night? I kept thinking I heard a dog al the way home.” He looked startled. “Did you see it?”
&nb
sp; “Not right then, but the next morning there was a dead cat on my doorstep so Dad reckoned it was a stray dog. Oh, wait, I saw a dog outside my house later that night, remember I told you? It was bigger than Cúchulain? Sort of looked like a wolf.” I laughed, half-joking.
He froze, a flicker of fear crossing his face when I wanted him to tel me I was being sily, it was just a dog. Then another thought occurred to me.
“Wait, what are you doing here?”
He blushed. “Oh, wel, I saw you leave, and I thought I’d see if you were coming back or what. But Dawn got in the way so you were already gone, I didn’t catch up until now.”
I looked away; I didn’t want to think about the party. “I didn’t think Tammie and Joey were going to come back, so there was no point staying.”
“Come back with me for a little while.”
I shook my head. “It’s not my thing. I was realy bored.”
“That’s because you didn’t dance!”
“People think I’m bad enough without me dancing by myself, Nathan.” I squirmed at the idea of him knowing what people thought of me. Wondered if maybe he was nice to me out of pity.
“You wouldn’t have been by yourself though, there were lots of people dancing.” I shouldn’t have expected him to understand.
“Your friends don’t like me Nathan, you know that. I don’t fit in with them,” I said, hoping he would leave it.
“Wel, come back and have one dance with just me, and then I’l walk you home.”
I tried not to look too pleased with the idea. “I don’t need to be chaperoned home you know.”
“Yeah, wel, don’t want you getting bitten by any stray dogs. Come on, just one dance, please?”
He smiled in that charming way of his that made my insides melt. I couldn’t help thinking, why am I arguing? Without Dawn’s disapproving stare, saying yes to him was a lot easier. Besides, I didn’t want to go home early to my Dad’s smug face.
Back at the party, Aaron made a show of puling me toward him, leering the whole time. I wrinkled my nose at the stench of stale beer.
“Come over here with me,” he said, so loud I froze, unsure of myself.
Nathan put his hand behind my back and led me away. “Maybe later Aaron, she owes me a dance first.” Aaron’s friends laughed and jeered. I could almost feel Nathan vibrating with annoyance beside me. He laid my jacket across the back of a chair, took my hand and led me into the middle of the room that had been emptied to make a mini dance floor. He clasped my fingers tight, as if expecting me to run. Maybe I would have, but I enjoyed the look of disgust on Dawn’s face first. Abbi winked at me, making me think maybe she wasn’t so bad after al.
Nathan guided me to a relatively empty space. The music changed to something a lot slower. People paired off around us. “Oh,” I said, backing away. “I should sit down.”
“You promised me a dance. Come on, it’s just a dance.”
I nodded, but I didn’t move. Nathan rubbed his jaw. “You’re realy going to make this hard for me, aren’t you?” He stepped toward me, his eyes so ful of amusement, I had to look away. Clearing his throat, he took one of my hands and put it on his shoulder, then dropped his hand to my waist. Every touch felt like it left a trail of sparks on my skin.
He touched my other hand, brought it close to his heart, held it there. I could feel his heartbeat drum against my fingertips. He caled my name softly. I couldn’t look at him without blushing, and I couldn’t look at everyone else without chickening out, so I stared at my hand on his shoulder instead.
He held me closer and sang along to the song under his breath. Said my name again. I chanced looking up at him and regretted it straight away. Being so close to him was a mistake; I would never get over him if I kept letting myself get sucked back in.
“Are you okay?” he asked. I nodded, but his expression stopped me from speaking. He never took his eyes off me, and I forgot al about everyone else. I let myself soak up his gaze, the fire on my skin wherever he touched me, the almost unbearable fluttering inside, the longing in his eyes that matched my own.
He gripped my hand tight. I don’t think he realised how hard he was squeezing until I winced. He apologised and let go, only to gently brush his thumb across my cheek. Such a simple thing, and yet it caused my whole body to shudder.
I wished he would kiss me.
He slipped both arms around me, and this time I moved closer, relishing how it felt to lean against his chest, but the song ended, and we puled apart slowly, reluctantly.
“I wish it was always like this with us,” I blurted out. His eyes widened with alarm, and he took a step backward. A step away from me—again.
It hit me then how close we had been. I couldn’t stand the look in his eyes without trembling. It was too much, only for him to blow cold again. I struggled to catch my breath. The sudden realization that the whole room was focused solely on us unleashed the wave of panic that had been building up within al evening.
“I need to go now,” I said. “I don’t need you to walk with me, I just have to get out of here.”
He nodded and folowed me anyway. So many pairs of eyes were on us; my first instinct had always been to run. Al of a sudden everything Nathan said or did seemed like something private and intimate, but it was al one-sided because he didn’t feel the same way. I pushed blindly past everyone, avoiding their eyes, desperate to get outside.
I made it to the door, but Joey got in my way.
“Where are you going?” He held out his hands to stop me.
“Home.”
“Wel, wait a second, we’l walk with you,” he said. Tammie made an impatient noise beside him.
“It’s fine, stay. I have to go,” I said.
“I’m not letting you go alone,” Joey said. “If you get attacked by that imaginary wild dog everyone’s going hysterical over, your Dad wil kil me.”
“Oh, just leave her Joey.” Tammie sounded impatient, but he frowned at her.
“I’l take her home,” Nathan volunteered.
Joey glanced at me. “I don’t think that’s the best idea.”
While they were arguing, Abbi ran over to me and surprised me with a quick hug.
“I’m so glad you came,” she gushed.
“Erm, okay, thanks.”
“No, realy. I used to think you were realy stuck up, but you’re just shy, right? Anyway, Nathan was so happy you turned up ‘cos everyone told him you wouldn’t.” She gave me another hug before wandering off to embrace some other random person. I turned my attention back to Nathan who was teling Joey and Tammie to stay and enjoy themselves and that he would probably be back in a while. Tammie whispered something into Joey’s ear making him more agreeable to it.
“We’l see you tomorrow,” Tammie said, but I was already walking away.
I needed fresh air. Lots of it. Outside, Aaron made a grab at me. This time he puled me close to him and didn’t let go. I could smel rubbish body spray and rancid sweat al over him. I tried to back away, but he held tight, a stupid drunken grin on his face. Some of his friends cheered.
“Leave it out.” Gavin, one of the footbal players, tried his best to calm things down.
I pushed at Aaron until he let go of my arm. I tried to get away, but I walked straight into Nathan. His jaw twitched with anger, and his pupils were dilating rapidly; I couldn’t stop staring. Nobody else seemed to notice but, to me, he looked dangerous.
“What are you playing at?” he said to Aaron who laughed.
“It’s later, man.”
“Leave her alone.” He spoke through clenched teeth.
Nathan pushed me behind him as Aaron lurched toward us. He squared up to Nathan who didn’t flinch. That infuriated Aaron. He pushed hard, but Nathan didn’t budge. Aaron must have been drunker than I thought. Gavin puled Aaron backward, just in time because he was about to throw a punch. Things were getting out of hand for no apparent reason. Whatever bothered Aaron about Nathan was boiling over because he was drunk an
d stupid. Reacting to it was even worse. I wasn’t interested in seeing it. Especialy when I felt so rejected.
“Screw this, I’m going home,” I said, pushing past the boys in my hurry to get out of there. Nathan folowed me, so I sped up, but he caught up with me easily.
“You alright?”
“I just don’t like... any of that.” I didn’t know how to deal with any of the feelings that had rushed to the surface.
Nathan rubbed his temples. “I’m sorry about tonight. I thought things would be different.”
I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter.” I realy wanted to go back to how it had been when we danced together, before he went cold on me. That wasn’t right either—I knew there was something there, I saw it in his eyes.
“Why is everything always so intense between us?” I asked him.
“What do you mean?”
“Don’t tel me you didn’t feel anything back there.” I stopped walking and stood in front of him.
His eyes softened. “Of course I felt... something.”
“But there’s always something, and you always back off! Then there are the dreams. In the art room that day, you were acting like you have my kind of dreams, like it means something. What does it mean, Nathan?” I knew there was something, I felt it, I just couldn’t get a firm hold on what it could be. I was determined to find out.
He shook his head. “Nothing important.”
I glared up at him, but he was just as freaked out as me; I could see it in his face. I wasn’t sure how to continue the conversation, so I chickened out and fel silent instead. I didn’t know how to ask him questions without sounding crazy, even though I was sure he understood exactly what I meant.
“I’m sorry everything is so messed up. I thought tonight would be fun for both of us.” He said. “I want... I’m sorry.”
“You can’t keep stepping away at the last second,” I said. He looked me right in the eye and nodded, like I was right. That gave me a spark of hope that I wasn’t going mad, and there realy was something I didn’t know yet.
Verity (Cursed #1) Page 13
