“I never asked permission.” He grabs my wrist and moves closer.
I inch toward him. “You made me care, damn you.”
“Is that a bad thing?”
“It’s not good.” I inhale deep and hold it, taking him in.
“You broke one of your precious rules.”
“Which one?”
He nods at the towel on the floor. “Rule eight.”
I admit nothing and lift my chin. “That’s only because I threw it at you.”
“Oh, so it’s okay to break the rules, but only on your terms? It doesn’t work that way, sweetheart. Either we break them together or we don’t break them at all.”
“Let me go.” He has no right to make me question my own rules. I made them. Therefore I get to decide when to break them or not.
He grips my other wrist and pulls me to him. “Say please.”
I inch even closer. My fury melts to want. He’s looking at me with such a dark hunger I tremble. His jaw tightens, his nostrils flare, as the truth settles in the air between us. This entire fight has led to this. The inevitable blowup. The thickness in the air crackles with energy. “Let me go.”
To my shock, he does and then cups my face. His gaze darkens more, sizzling with need. I rest my hands on his hard chest. He rocks his hips against mine. “What if I don’t want to?”
I don’t want him to. Still, I can’t give in so easily, not after our epic battle. “What if I don’t give you a choice?”
“I’m not letting you go.”
“I don’t want you to,” I admit in a whisper.
“What do you want, Kayla?”
I sob against his lips as my defenses crumble. I’m not sure how he did it, only that he succeeded on breaking through all my walls when no one else could. Then again, no one else stuck around long enough to try. “I want you to fight for me. I want you to save me from myself. I want to live, damn it. I’m too scared to do that. I need you, Jake. I need you to teach me how to live.”
“Challenge accepted. Now, kiss me.” He licks his lips.
I almost do and stop. “But we’re fighting.”
“Not anymore,” he murmurs and moves in. “Now we’re making up.”
He crushes his lips to mine and I whimper into his mouth, the sound a cross between hunger and desperation. All the anger churning in my senses melts into a driving need to make up—in every sense. I claw at his shirt, anxious to tear it from his body.
When he growls into the kiss, I completely lose it. It’s a primal sound to match the primal urges rushing through my body. He nips my lips, driving me wild. I rake my nails over his bare shoulders.
He hisses in a breath. “Jesus, Kayla. I can’t think straight when you do shit like that.”
I bite his shoulder and then kiss it. “Better?”
“Baby, I’m going to paddle your ass. You know better than to bite. Bad Kayla.”
“You’ve not seen bad,” I taunt and throw my shirt over my head. Screw nice, quiet Kayla. She’s held me back long enough. I want to be bad Kayla. I want him to experience the Kayla I want to be, not the pathetic, scared of everything Kayla I’ve become. I writhe against him, desperate to get closer. After opening his jeans, I reach in and fist his cock, stroking it as I squeeze.
“Good God, baby. Easy. I’ll completely lose it if you do that too many times.” He grabs my hand and pulls it to his chest. “It’s not a weekday morning. We don’t have to rush. Come on. There’s something I’ve wanted to try with you.”
I’m intrigued and a bit scared of that wicked glimmer in his eye. We’ve just had the biggest knockdown, drag-out fight we’ve ever had, and now he wants me to follow him? He leads me into his bedroom and over to the bed. His gaze never leaving mine, he strips me down and flattens me out on the mattress, my head on his pillows. “What are you going to do?”
“You’ll see.” He then pulls out a silk scarf and wiggles his eyebrows. “And now you won’t.”
“Jake, what—”
“Relax.” When he holds up the scarf, he asks, “You trust me, don’t you?”
Despite the alarms screaming in my head, I nod. I trust him wholeheartedly. He wraps it around my head and ties it, covering my eyes. My heart shoots to my throat and thuds in my ears. “I don’t know about this.”
“You’ve admitted to being scared on multiple occasions,” he points out as I feel the heat from his body over mine. His breath is hot and moist against my ear as he whispers, “Are you scared now?”
“A little.” Okay, that’s a lie. I’m pretty freaked out, but I do trust Jake, more than anything. That scares me more than being blindfolded.
“I could always tie you up.”
“Not if you want to keep going.” My heart skips. The idea of him tying me up blows my mind. I suck in a breath when he runs his fingers down my ribcage. He knows I’m ticklish, damn it. I feel his lips on my skin, first on my ribs, then under the curve of my breast. He reaches my hard nipple and I cry out.
His chuckle catches in my ear and whispers across my skin, charging it. He captures my other nipple and I arch my back. Sweet Jesus, he’s good at that. I’m about to climax on the spot and he’s not even touched me below the waist.
“They say if you take away one of the senses, the others kick in even more.”
I’ll say. I feel every kiss, every lick, every breath. His touch ignites my soul and I’m helpless but to lie here and let him have his wicked way with me. Well, okay. I may not be entirely helpless, but I don’t want him to stop, so I hold still and wait.
He moves to my belly button and kisses it. The heat from his body sears me. I anticipate his touch everywhere and am ready to cry out from the anticipation. “Jake,” I whimper when he doesn’t touch me again right away. “Please.”
“You have no idea how beautiful you are right now.” He runs his finger down the top of my thigh and then up the center, stopping a hint before brushing against my curls. And then I feel his breath on them. When he flicks at my flesh with his tongue, I jerk. He kisses my inner thigh. “I’m going to drive you crazy, first with my mouth, and then the rest of me.”
He knows I can’t come that way. He’s tried and it just doesn’t happen. I tense and try to sit up. He pushes me back down. I grab for the blindfold. “Playtime is over, big boy.”
“Relax. Keep the scarf over your eyes.”
“Is that why you wanted me blindfolded? So you can try to get me to come?”
He doesn’t answer and instead slowly, lazily, runs his tongue between my saturated folds. When he hits my clit I almost jump off the bed. He’s right about the blindfold on this, too. I’ve never been more tuned in to his every touch. I want to reach for him but stop myself and instead fist the sheets as he attacks. His assault has me writhing, the tension tightening inside me like an angry snake. I’m shocked and can’t make sense of why now, after all the times together, after any time with anyone else, I’ve never come close to an orgasm when someone goes down on me.
Not so this time. He doesn’t let up and I’m crying out as my climax grows and grows, intensifying so much it scares me. I’m whimpering and speaking in tongues. It’s building. So close. So very close.
He flicks my clit and I shatter, screaming out from the force of it all. I see red as I squeeze my eyes shut. Jake doesn’t let up and I’m begging, pleading. For what, I don’t know. Just when I’m sure I’m about to pass out from the strength of my release, the heat of his body envelops me and then his sheathed cock presses into my entrance. I scream again as my orgasm comes back for another round.
He lifts the blindfold from my eyes and I blink against the light. “I love you, Kayla.” He then kisses me, consuming my soul. He pumps his hips and I can’t stop crying out from the pleasure. I feel every thick inch of him inside me and again, the tension builds. I’m going to come again and I whimper, not sure I can take another hit like that. I haven’t recovered and am still seeing little red dots in my vision. But the orgasm builds, burns, tightens. I w
himper again.
“Move with me.” He grabs my hips and directs the pace. I hold onto his shoulders and rock my hips to meet his. Soon we’re slamming into each other, driving the other to the release that’s just out of reach. He moves faster and I’m there.
I scream and lock my nails onto his shoulders as the explosion rocks my center. “Jake!”
He thrusts hard and stiffens. I ride out my orgasm as my body milks his from him. Only after I’ve dug my nails out of his flesh does he slow and eventually collapse to me. “Holy,” he pants, “shit.”
I don’t have the power to speak so I nod in agreement.
“We need to have make-up sex more often.” He rolls to the side and lands on his back. “The blindfold definitely did the trick.”
That it did. “Maybe we can find a better way to have make-up sex.”
He rises to his elbow and props his head on his hand to look down at me. “Are you complaining?”
“About the sex, no. I just don’t like fighting.” I hold his gaze. “I’m sorry for saying those things to you. I don’t hate you.”
He leans in and kisses me. “I know.”
“I’m just scared.”
“I know.”
“And you’re right. I really do have control issues.”
“That’s why I blindfolded you,” he tells me. “You gave over control. And you know what? You liked it.”
I laugh. “Maybe a little.”
“Maybe next time you’ll let me tie you up.”
“Not if you ever want to have sex again.”
He grins and pulls me to him. I curl against his body, loving the way we fit together. “How about we call that a maybe?”
I nod. It’s a definite maybe.
30
[Jake]
Sometimes life makes no sense. Why pizzas are round yet the boxes they come in are square. Why a whole mountainside slides down, burying an entire town without warning, and no one knew about the instability. How tornadoes can hit one house and miss the next one, but then blow out the one behind it. None of that makes any sense.
But with Kayla, life does make sense. The more I think about it, the more I decide to keep that little tidbit to myself. I’ve already done enough damage with my big mouth. Sean and Eli have made it their mission to make me rethink my decision to stay with Kayla now that the wishes are over, let alone be exclusive with her. I’m sure her friends are thinking the same thing, but I don’t care. I love her. I do, and there’s nothing anyone can say to change that, even her.
I step off the bus and turn to wait for her. I’m carrying most of the food on my insistence, but she still has her hands full. No way are we going to leave Ryan to Emma’s cooking. I’ve made a dozen idiot-proof dinners and packed them in ovenproof containers. Not even Emma can screw these up.
“What time do you have to be at the firehouse again?” Kayla asks as we fall into step, heading for Ryan’s apartment.
“I asked for the day off.”
“You did?” She turns to me. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is perfect.” I steal a kiss. The concern in her beautiful eyes warms me. Damn, this is awesome and terrifying at the same time. I’ve never been in love. I’ve never lost myself in a woman before. With Kayla, I’ve been lost in her since the boyfriend burning. That wide-eyed look, both from the fire and me appearing with my trusty extinguisher to save the day, will forever be etched into my memories. “I asked the cap when you were taking a shower.”
“You were in the shower with me and I distinctly remember you not having a phone. In fact, I’m pretty sure you had your hands full.”
I smile at the memory. That I did. With her, I always have my hands full. “After that.”
She shrugs and switches the bag of food to her other shoulder. “I texted Emma and asked if it was still okay for us to visit. She said she was starving and couldn’t wait.”
“I’m going to have to teach her how to cook,” I laugh. “No one should be as bad a cook as she is. Ryan’s told me stories. Did you know she’s given him food poisoning? Twice.”
“I believe it. You’ve heard about her aversion to eggs, right?”
“Do I want to know?”
“They scare her.”
I laugh again. “Eggs?” We reach Ryan’s apartment and knock. “Do I need to know anything else before we go in?”
“Start small,” she tells me and pats my chest. “Teach her the basics. Baby steps, big boy.”
I grab her hand and hold it as I rest my lips to hers. I take my time teasing her before swiping my tongue out to find hers. She meets me halfway and melts against me. When she whimpers into my mouth, I’m lost in her. God, how’d she do it? How’d she turn me, a player and proud of it, into a one-woman man? I don’t know and right now, I don’t care. I just want to stay lost in her forever.
“Should you two get a room?” Emma interrupts us, and we jump back. I lick Kayla’s taste from my lips and smile when her cheeks grow a beautiful shade of red. “I could always come back if you two want to finish. I’m sure the neighbors wouldn’t mind a show.”
We say nothing as we step into the apartment. It’s small, but I expected no less from a one-bedroom on campus. Our two-bedroom is huge compared to this shoebox. No wonder Emma wants to get their own place. I’d go nuts living in an apartment this small.
“Here,” I present our offerings. “It’s dinner for a month. All eggs have been properly subdued. You only need to heat. Where can we put them?”
“Good thing. If eggs are involved, we’d both starve.” She points in the direction of the kitchen. Despite the front she’s forcing that smile through, I know her injuries. I needed the details of the injuries sustained for the report which, of course, I got stuck with writing, being the cadet. The nicks and scrapes on her face are superficial. She also sustained two cracked ribs, bruises from ass to elbow, and a mild concussion. By the way she’s moving—slow, deliberate—she’s feeling every injury. They could have been a lot worse had Ryan not turned toward the car a split second before the driver slammed into them.
I grab the bag from Kayla and carry them into the kitchen. As I busy myself with putting everything away, Kayla helps Emma into a chair in the living room. Their kitchen is totally set up wrong, but it’s not mine so I say nothing as I work my way through the bags of dinners and other groceries we brought them. Can we afford this? No. We’ll be eating leftovers Kayla brings home from the diner for the foreseeable future. Would we do it again?
That’s not even a question.
“How are you?” Kayla asks. “You look like you’re in pain.”
“I’ll manage.” Emma shrugs and tries not to wince, but I catch it. She hurts. “I’ve had better days.”
“What kind of meds do they have you on?”
“Oxy for the pain. I hate it, so I don’t take it.”
“Emma, if you hurt, take it.”
She shakes her head carefully. “I’m fine.”
I know why. I’ve seen it before. People stay stone cold sober and endure the pain to take care of the spouse. Love makes a person do some pretty strange shit. I smile at the thought of all the stupid shit I already do for my girl.
“Looks like you’re healing well.” An older woman wheels Ryan into the living room. His leg is casted straight out. He has a brace on his shoulder to keep the collarbone aligned. The cuts, scrapes, and bruises are a welcome sight. He may look like he lost a bar fight, but he’s definitely healing.
“Thanks, Dr. Levy.” Ryan grins as she parks him next to Emma and sets the brakes on the wheelchair. He spots me, and his grin widens. “Hey.”
“’Sup.”
“You two are amazingly bad at this.” Emma rolls her eyes before regarding the doctor. “Is he really doing okay?”
“He is.” She smiles warmly and grabs a coat off the back of the couch. “If there’s nothing else, I’ll be on my way. Your brother is waiting for my report.”
“He could have come himself.”<
br />
“The last I checked, he doesn’t have a degree in medicine and forty years of experience on his side. Trust me, Harold. It’s better I’m here.”
Ryan sighed. “I told you it’s Ryan now.”
“I’ve been your family’s doctor since before you were born, young man. I even delivered you. You will answer to the name your parents gave you.”
“Yes, ma’am.” He colors to his ears.
“I’ll see you in a week. Emma, make sure he takes his meds.”
She stops behind Ryan and places her hands on his shoulders. “Yes, ma’am.”
“I don’t like them,” Ryan whines after the doctor leaves. “You can’t make me take them.”
“Doctor’s orders,” Emma points out, her hands on Ryan’s shoulders. Judging by the way he’s cringing, she’s digging her nails hard, and not in a good way. “Quit acting like a child, Harold.”
“Ow, ow, ow.” Ryan jerks her hands from her death grip. “I’m in enough pain, Em.”
“You’ll be in even more pain if you won’t let me take care of you.”
“Yes, dear.”
“I will cut you.”
Ryan laughs and grabs her, easing her down onto his lap. “I still can’t take you seriously when you say that.”
“Fine,” she says as she clearly holds back a smile. “I’ll have Britt cut you.”
They both laugh and then he kisses her. I divert my gaze, but not before I catch Kayla watching them, a longing expression on her face. She wants what they have and my gut twists. I want to give it to her but don’t know how. I’m not Ryan, not by a long shot.
“Let’s make them dinner,” Kayla offers and hurries into the kitchen.
“Like a double date,” Emma says. She and Ryan nod at each other. “It’s just like the park.”
I stop myself from correcting her. The park didn’t start that way. I had no idea they’d camp right next to us. I’m not sure how I feel spending so much time with my partner outside of our trainings and missions. We work together. That doesn’t mean we need to hang together. What if we spend too much time together and end up hating each other? Ryan and Kayla are way too alike. I found a way to break through her walls. Have I done the same with him? I want to say yes, but I’m not really sure.
The Heat Is On (TREX Rookies Book 2) Page 27
