In spite of how badly he’d acted Thursday morning when he’d done his best to seduce her, she hadn’t brought it up again and he sure wasn’t going to. He didn’t know if it was exhaustion, desperation, the thrill of doing so well in competition, or just how adorably sexy she looked when he’d stumbled out of his room and saw her working, but something had made him want her so badly, he couldn’t stand it. The longing and desire he felt for Jessie wasn’t just in a physical sense, either. He felt some inexplicable need to connect with her heart, to know her mind, to bask in her very essence.
Yet, she’d shot him down so fast, it had wounded his pride and left him angry. Angry at her for telling him no. Angry at himself for not being able to keep his love for her hidden. He’d long ago admitted how much he loved her, at least to himself, but he’d never tell Jessie. Not when everything about him and his lifestyle was so wrong for her. She needed a husband who would be home every night, one who paid attention to her work projects — to her. One who didn’t come with a truck load of baggage and dozens of zealous female fans.
“You got yourself quite a girl, Chase,” Cooper said, tipping his head toward the door where Jessie had disappeared to change. “Paige and I both think she’s terrific.”
“She is pretty awesome,” Chase agreed. He felt off balance after the shock of Jessie’s sexy appearance on stage, not to mention catching the appreciative glances so many men cast her way. He wanted to punch each and every single one of those guys right in the nose for ogling his wife.
“Glad you think so. Girls like Jessie, and of course my beautiful bride, are few and far between. You better hold onto her with both hands.”
“I plan to.” But did he really? He hadn’t even tried to hold onto Jessie with one hand. He’d flirted with her, teased her, desired her, but he hadn’t tried to hold her. She deserved so much better than the likes of him and he knew it. That’s why he would let her go no matter how much he wanted her to stay.
Paige motioned for the two men to come out on the stage to model more designs from the men’s line.
When they’d made it up and down the runway, the emcee motioned them over to stand by her as a handful of women, including Jessie, walked up and down the runway, then moved into the positions where they were supposed to stand on the stage so everyone had plenty of time to see the outfits they wore.
Dressed in a pair of jeans that fit her perfectly, Chase couldn’t take his eyes off Jessie’s backside. He missed the fact the emcee wanted to talk to him until Cooper gave him a push toward the podium and the woman holding a microphone.
Chase was a pro at doing interviews. Shove a mic in his face and ask about his ride, and he could make a statement that made him sound humble, grateful, and elated all at the same time. If they wanted to know about his career, his rodeo experiences, his plans for the future, or his ranch, he could give an intelligent statement seasoned with wit and humor.
Unfortunately for Chase, the emcee had an entirely different topic in mind as she smiled at him. “Chase Jarrett. Thank you for being here with us today.”
He plastered on a charming grin and waved to the crowd. “It’s my pleasure. What a great cause, too, with Lasso Eight supporting children’s hospitals across the country.”
The crowd cheered then settled down.
“We’ve all been admiring your lovely wife, Chase. She’s just beautiful.” The woman cast a friendly smile at Jessie and motioned for her to join them.
Jessie forced a bright smile and walked over to stand next to Chase. Automatically, his arm slid around her waist, his fingers resting on the curve of her hip.
“Have you all met Jessie? Isn’t she something?” he asked. Proud of her, of how well she’d done in both fashion shows, he was about to pop the snaps open on his shirt. He knew she hated being in the spotlight, but she’d done it because both shows were for a good cause and because he’d asked her to.
Thoughts of all the times in the past year she’d been shoved beyond her comfort zone because of him sent a wave of guilt crashing over him, leaving him even more rattled than he’d already been.
He still hadn’t recovered from seeing her in that little black dress and the outfit she currently wore left him wondering what she’d do if he glided his hand down a little further and cupped her delectable rear end.
Distracted by thoughts of his wife, Chase gave the emcee a confused look when she asked him a question. He would have missed what had been said entirely, but Jessie subtly slid her hand down to cover his and gave him a slight pinch.
“I’m so dazzled by my wife, I missed your question, ma’am,” he admitted, drawing laughs and cheers from the crowd.
“I just asked if you two plan to continue modeling for Lasso Eight’s campaign in the coming year. Will we be able to look forward to seeing you in advertisements together?”
Balls of nerves bounced around in his stomach. Combined with his overload of emotions concerning Jessie, two weeks of adrenaline highs and lows, and the fatigue of being non-stop on the go, something suddenly short-circuited in his brain. At least, that was the only plausible excuse Chase would later derive for the comments that burst out of his mouth.
“Heck no, I plan to keep her hidden away at home.” He spun Jessie around and pointed to her bottom. “You think I’m letting something like that go on public display after this fashion show? Not going to happen. Besides, you should see what this girl looks like at three in the morning with her hair all…” Chase waved his hands around his head, making it clear Jessie’s hair went everywhere, “and her granny jammies on. It’s amazing what these makeup techs can do. Why, I almost didn’t recognize her when she came out a little bit ago in that little bitty black dress.” Aware of the hideous words pouring out of his mouth, Chase was helpless to hold them back. “You know one good thing about Jessie, though, is she doesn’t talk much. She’s never once asked if something makes her butt look big, and that’s a good thing, especially with those granny jammies.”
Gasps sounded throughout the room, the loudest coming from the emcee. Painfully aware of every stupid thing he’d just said, it was too late to reel the words back in. Men laughed and a few spiteful women giggled, but Chase knew Jessie would never forgive him for embarrassing her so thoroughly and publicly. What he meant to say came out in a convoluted mess that made it sound like he thought Jessie had hips as wide as a semi and needed all the makeup help she could get. His true thoughts on both subjects were completely opposite of what he’d just said, but at the moment no one would believe him if he made an attempt to clarify his muddled thoughts.
A quick glance at his wife showed her smiling, but the light that normally shone in her eyes had dulled and her face appeared incredibly pale while her cheeks blazed with twin spots of bright red. It looked like someone had placed a Christmas berry on the curve of each smooth cheek.
Chase wanted to apologize, to grovel, to crawl in a hole and disappear, but he remained silent as he numbly smiled at the emcee then the crowd.
“Well, thanks for joining us, Jessie and Chase.” The emcee turned back to the crowd and skillfully segued to the next modeling segment while Chase offered Jessie his arm and escorted her off the stage.
The minute they were behind the curtain, he tried to apologize, but she kept walking. He started to follow her, but Cooper grabbed his arm to stop him from entering the room where the women were changing.
“Dude! Did you have a total brain disconnect?” Cooper stared at him in disbelief. “Man, you are gonna be sleeping in the doghouse for the rest of your life. What were you thinking?”
Chase sighed and took off his hat, running a hand through his hair. “Clearly, I wasn’t. I didn’t mean… I have no idea…” he sighed again. “It’ll be fine. Jessie never gets mad, not like most women. She’ll be fine.”
Cooper raised both eyebrows and shook his head. “You’re even dumber than you sounded out there if you believe that, Chase. You really, really stepped in it this time.”
Chase
would have offered a rebuttal, but Ashley appeared out of nowhere and slugged Chase’s arm so hard, it actually hurt.
He scowled at her and rubbed the tender spot. “Hey, what are you doing? That’s my riding arm, you know.”
“I don’t care, you moron! How could you blather on like a brainless idiot? Are you trying to kill your career? Even worse, what are you trying to do to Jessie? If she ran over you with your big pickup, shot all your bulls, and burned your house down, those women out there would stand up and applaud! What were you thinking? Granny jammies, Chase? Really?” Ashley took a breath, appearing to calm down, then turned and smacked him upside the head. “Well, no rocks or marbles rolled out. At least that’s something.”
Chase didn’t know what to say because Ashley was right. He’d not only made himself look stupid, but he’d hurt Jessie in the process. Mortified and livid wouldn’t begin to cover how she must be feeling. He knew her well enough to know she was most likely on the verge of dying of embarrassment.
“Don’t just stand there, say something!” Ashley slugged him again. “You didn’t seem to have any problem flapping your gums at full-speed a few minutes ago.”
Chase swallowed hard and stared at his cousin. “I don’t know what happened. I don’t even know where the words came from. I didn’t mean… It’s not what…” He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think.
“Come with me,” Ashley ordered, grasping his sleeve and dragging him to an empty room behind the stage. After shutting the door, she turned around and shook a finger in his face. “I don’t know what has happened between the two of you, but fix it, Chase. We all wanted this marriage to work for you both. It might just take a Christmas miracle for you and Jessie to get past your stubborn pride and admit you love each other. Regardless of what you think or she thinks, the fact remains that you two are in love. However, your little escapade out there will be the final straw for her, Chase. You’ve dragged her all over the country to rodeos without a thought to how hard that is for her. She runs her own business, Chase. That work she does on the computer isn’t just her playing games. Don’t you realize she designed all the graphics for today, from the signs to the programs? She did that, your wife. She’s an amazing designer and she’s come into her own this last year. People are lining up for the chance to hire her.”
Ashley paced back and forth then rounded on him again. “I know you didn’t ask it or expect it of her, but she turned your house into a warm, inviting home. A haven where you can relax when you aren’t on the road. A place where your family and friends feel not just welcomed, but cherished. She did that, Chase. She cooks for you. Does your laundry. Helps on the ranch. I’m not supposed to tell you this, but your Christmas gift from her is something with four legs that will do great things for your herd of cattle.”
“I had no idea,” Chase said, feeling the need to sit down as he realized how little he did know about his wife. How much he’d taken advantage of her because she had a kind, giving heart. He slid down the wall to the floor.
“No you didn’t and you still don’t. But I’ll tell you something. Something you’ve needed to hear for a very long time.” Ashley inhaled a deep breath and sat beside him. “You remember when we were kids and every December you’d go with Mom and Dad and me to the mall to visit Santa. Every year, you asked for some incredible gift that you always got, but it wasn’t what you wanted. What you wished for more than anything was for your parents to take even five minutes to devote to just you, to pay attention to you, to see you. You did your best to make Christmas perfect, hoping each one would be the year you’d get what your heart wanted.”
She reached out and squeezed his hand. “You chased Christmas like you chase after everything else, with a single-minded pursuit. You worked so hard to get the attention of your parents, but they didn’t care enough to notice you. Then you pursued being the best surfer you could and won all those awards. You went after your rodeo career and look where it’s taken you. Unless you totally screw up your ride tonight, you’ll walk away from this as the world champion bull rider. You’ve spent your whole life chasing something, Chase. Yet, when the most precious thing you could ever have is about to slip through your hands, you sit here like a brainless dolt. Get after that girl of yours. Chase her down with the relentless effort you’ve put into so many other, far less important things.”
Chase leaned his head against the wall. “I think it’s too late, Ash. You didn’t see the look in her eyes. It’s over.”
“It’s only over if you let it be.” Ashley gave him a hug then got to her feet and left.
Chase remained there until the noise outside shifted from a loud din to silence. He had no idea what he could do to make things right with Jessie, but he had to try.
After changing his clothes, he went back to the hotel, hoping to catch her there, but the suite was silent. He tried her cell phone, but she didn’t answer. In a moment of desperation, he even tried calling Stacey, but it went straight to voice mail.
A glance at his watch confirmed he had to get to the arena if he wanted to compete tonight.
He grabbed his gear from his room, wondering if he’d see Jessie again that night. He went to the rodeo, hoping he’d figure out something he could do to earn her forgiveness.
A few minutes before it started, he looked out in the stands and saw Jessie sitting in her regular seat between Ashley and his aunt. Relieved she was there, he switched his focus from fretting about how badly he’d messed things up with her to how badly he wanted to win the championship.
The time seemed to pass so slowly until it was his turn as the last contestant of the night to ride. The bull he’d drawn hadn’t been ridden in the last thirty-eight attempts. Undeterred by the odds of receiving a no-score, he tightened the rope in his hand and settled into his seat then nodded his head.
Eight seconds that would define his career.
Chase waved his free hand in the air and clamped his jaw, determined to score as the bull roared out of the chute and spun in a dizzying circle.
Six seconds until he could taste success.
The bull cut to the left and bucked so hard, Chase questioned if the beast would flip over on him. If it did, he’d at least get a re-ride.
Four seconds to prove he was worthy.
Worthy of what? Parents who’d never wanted him. Fans that would use him. Peers who judged him. A woman who would have loved him if he’d given her a chance.
Two seconds standing between him and his dreams coming true.
Chase almost lost his hold on the rope as the realization hit him that Jessie was his dream come true. His career, the ranch, even a world champion title meant nothing if she wasn’t by his side.
The buzzer sounded and the crowd went wild, surging to their feet.
Chase yanked the rope from his gloved hand and jumped off, running for the chutes. The bull charged after him, but Chase managed to leap onto a paneled gate before it caught him.
In a moment when he should have been filled with pride, joy, and a sense of great accomplishment, he instead experienced a swelling panic at the thought that Jessie would walk out of his life and he’d never see her again.
When he looked into the stands for her, to see her reaction to his win, she was already gone.
Chapter Twenty-Two
If a person could die of humiliation, Jessie’s corpse would have been carried off the stage during the fashion show.
What had Chase been thinking to say the things he had? It was bad enough he’d spun her around and pointed to her backside in front of everyone, but the way he talked about not letting her model made him sound like a knuckle-dragging cavedweller. Not that she ever wanted to set foot on another runway, but that was for her to decide, not him.
Then, in stunned mortification, she’d listened to him refer to her granny jammies not once, but twice. Seriously? The only thing worse would have been if he told everyone she wore granny undies, which she most certainly did not. Her pajamas weren’t the type a grand
ma would wear, either. Stacey and Ashley had made sure of that.
Horrified by Chase’s words, he’d made it even worse when he implied he thought she had a big rear. And his comment about her not talking much made them both sound stupid. Was he trying to be funny? If so, it fell far short of the mark.
In fact, she’d been gratified to hear the collective gasp from the majority of the women in the audience. Whether Chase realized it or not, he had broken several cardinal rules of things you never say about your wife in public.
Ever.
Regardless of their marriage status, since the people who knew it was in name only could be counted on one hand, he should never have embarrassed her like that in front of hundreds of people.
Jessie wasn’t sure what emotion on the anger scale came after livid, but whatever it was, she’d surpassed the mark.
She’d never been so upset in her entire life, and there had been plenty of bad moments during all the years she’d lived with her parents and brother. In fact, there had been several moments since she’d married Chase that had required all her willpower to control her temper.
After today, after him making fun of her in public, she was finished. Through. Completely and totally done with the man.
The moment the fashion show ended, Jessie changed her clothes, grabbed her bag, and hustled back to the hotel room. It didn’t take her long to pack her suitcase and carry-on bag. She’d even started out the door to go to the airport to see if she could catch an earlier flight, when she decided she wouldn’t give Chase the satisfaction of making her leave. Not yet.
She’d promised to attend every night of the rodeo, and she would. She might have a butt bigger than those scrawny, catty women who apparently caught his eye, but by golly, she was a girl who kept her word.
With a determined step, she returned to her bedroom, tossed the suitcase and bag on the bed, and pulled out her laptop. Originally, she and Chase planned to fly out Monday morning. She managed to get a flight that would leave that night, changed into the clothes she planned to wear to the rodeo, and left the hotel room.
Chasing Christmas: (Sweet Holiday Western Romance) (Rodeo Romance Book 5) Page 27
