“Jen?” johnny said, like knocking on a door.
I sighed, knowing I must answer. I eyed johnny warily. “Okay, what is this about a battle?”
He looked straight through me. “We must kill Chord.”
I looked straight back. “We?” I said, a bit like a mouse.
The empty water bottle vanished. He squeezed my hands. “You must fight too.”
I shook my head, dipping my chin to my chest.
“Jen, you can do this.”
I shook my head. “I don’t want anything else to do with him. I have had enough! I just want to go home and erase him from my mind forever.”
“Jen?” johnny’s voice penetrated deep, “You know it doesn’t work that way. He will just keep coming after us.”
My head flew up. “You don’t really need my help, do you?”
“In this situation, yes, I require your help.”
I felt hot in my dirty gown. I was suffocating. “I can’t breathe!” I stepped back, clutching my chest.
He said, “The stars are in perfect alignment for you to complete this task. Your natal Mars and Pluto square your progressed Mars and Pluto, trine Jupiter and Venus. You have the firepower to overcome oppression, with luck and love on your side. You have this power today.”
Teary, I said, “johnny, I was ready to die to today!”
“That has all changed because I am here. I represent your Jupiter-Venus trine. Though it might be hard to believe, today, I am your luck and your love. We will defeat him. Yes, there will be a battle, but we will win. We fight tonight.”
“Tonight? Why tonight?”
“At night, Tazmarkian powers magnify.”
“Magnify? Why would either of you want that?”
“Tazmarks crave challenge. Prolonging the battle heightens satisfaction.”
I froze. “What sort of fight are you talking about?”
johnny’s eyes hardened. He threw his hand up in front of my cheek. Red light sparked around his fingers before fading. “Chord is trying to get you.”
I stared at his hand, seeing Chord beyond. His red cocoon had grown thicker, but his whirling gold eyes shined through.
Level four?—I wondered.
johnny said, “Look at me, Jen. Not him.”
I looked into johnny’s orange eyes. “What were those sparks around your fingers?”
“I shattered an illusion he was trying to give you.”
I clenched my teeth. “I’m tired of him invading me.” I tried to slide to johnny’s side so Chord couldn’t see me, but johnny turned with me, his back to Chord.
“Hiding won’t protect you. He attacked you for six months without visual contact. The only answer is to face him.”
I shook my head tensely. “This is far too complex for me. I can’t fight magic.”
“You have, Jen. You just didn’t know it.”
My voice trembled, “Surely johnny, now that you are restored, you don’t need my help. You are stronger than him, so what’s the problem?”
“There would be no problem, if I were only fighting him.”
I couldn’t breathe again. Where was my bottle? Paper. I needed to peel paper. I gasped for air. “Who . . .” I gulped, “else are we fighting?”
“Chord brought company.”
“How . . . how do you know this?”
“Moving into minds, Jen. You know that’s what I do.”
“What company?”
“They are Tazmark. He lured them here with the promise of a grand battle. And grand it must be, or the other two Tazmarks would have engaged him in combat by now. He’s not so powerful, but he is clever. However, it has taken him three hundred years to set me up for this.”
My head fell forward, eyes closed, face scrunched, and I wasn’t breathing again.
“Jen?” johnny’s seductive voice penetrated me.
My hands flew over my face as I shook my head vigorously, breathing hotly into my palms.
“Jen?” His voice penetrated deeper, arousing my heart.
“Ohhh,” I whimpered, dropping my hands over my stomach. “Okay, okay, tell me more.”
johnny said matter-of-factly, “One of the Tazmark’s that Chord has recruited is a Black Tazmark. I sense his powerful old presence. He will be a challenge.”
“Uh,” I whined, “but Chord alone is unbearable. Look what he did to us! If there is one worse than him . . . oh—!” My hands flew back over my face.
“Jen,” he drew my hands down gently, “as long as there’s not one worse than me, we’ll be all right.”
“Uh,” I complained, “I don’t want to do this.”
“You’ve been doing it for the last six months and you’ve been doing a good job, if only Chord had been your target.”
I moaned, dipping my head to his chest in defeat. “Oh, why can’t we all just love each other?”
He rubbed my back. “That is the way of Shen, not Tazmark. You will soon learn that there is more to us than our nightly feed and basic magic.”
I stepped back, my face drawn in dread. “More?”
“Earth has natural laws, however, we can manipulate them.”
“Am I ready to hear this?”
“You’d best be. Tonight you will experience it.”
My chest tightened. I closed my eyes as if that would help filter the brash truth. “Okay, tell me.”
“We can erupt volcanoes, magically induce fire, and summon earthquakes—basically anything that has to do with heat and friction.”
I wanted to open my eyes, but I couldn’t. Assessing him in this new light terrified me, and that made me begin to terrify him.
He rubbed his hand gently down my arm, and somehow my terror quelled, but my eyes remained closed. He continued, “Earth is a melting pot of species catastrophically colliding, or sweetly uniting, like you and me, but not without pain. You can’t save the world, Jen. You can’t even save yourself. But you can save me.” He placed his hands on my shoulders and kissed me on the forehead. I opened my eyes, catching the significant look in his. “And I can save you.”
He combed his fingers through my stringy hair. Yes, I was healthy, but geez was I grimy, especially in my soiled gown of death.
“Set aside your principles for this one day.” He drew me tight against him with my cheek to his chest. “You have more power, Jen. Much more.”
“More?” I pushed myself away from him, afraid and excited by the news. “More? Really?”
“Give it permission to activate. Treasure this battle. We will remember it always as the day we united our powers to defeat a common foe. A day that we, natural enemies, found a way to harmonize. This day, we’ll not only manipulate natural law, we will defeat it.”
I sighed deeply, deciding I must try to do this thing. I couldn’t believe he’d actually inspired me to fight three magical creatures who wanted to kill us only a shred more than they wanted to kill each other.
I said, “So, three Tazmarks have unified to participate in this battle, but I thought Tazmarks didn’t unify. I thought they just killed each other?”
“I am the most powerful Tazmark on earth. They cannot defeat me alone, especially since I have been regenerated. An exhilarating fight is a Tazmark’s greatest joy. If they must unite to defeat me, they will.”
“Why didn’t you go after Chord centuries ago? You could have killed him before it ever came to this.”
“Ah Jen,” his eyes took on a mischievous expression, “that would be no fun.”
I stepped back. “Fun! Is that what this is all about? Fun?”
“If you weren’t in danger—yes, it would be thrilling.”
I blinked, speechless in my stupor.
johnny, however, became excited. “It still can be thrilling. Play with me Jen. Be my partner in these Tazmark games.”
“Games? It’s more like suicide! Three Tazmarks against you—and inexperienced me.” I backed up a few steps in an involuntary escapist reaction. “We can’t win, johnny, not if it depends
on me.”
I whirled around fast and ran toward the cabin. My soft feet smashed against hard, little pine cones. Sharp, tiny rocks gouged my skin. No matter. The pain faded into my emotional turmoil. I yearned to rest upon the bed I had once slept in with my mother. I wanted to pretend she was there, holding me, just for a moment, just for a while. I needed to be alone for a bit to dissolve my fear, and to rally the courage to shine the real me loud and strong. If I were to die this night, I wanted to go down like a Musketeer. But, oh dear Angels, three Tazmarks, against johnny and me!
I reached the cabin, raced up the two steps, and flung open the door, banging into a brawny bare chest. I shrieked and lurched back, tripping and falling off the steps, smacking my hip on the hard ground. Pain stabbed my bones.
johnny walked toward me, saying, “—and the Zandron.”
The Zandron! Oh no, not the Zandron! I was all tangled in my gown, but I pulled myself sideways along the ground away from the Zandron.
The Zandron stared at me, blank faced, like some Asian version of John Wayne. He looked so callous with his chest puffed in his black and brown checked western shirt, and his legs spread apart in a sturdy stance that befit the rugged look of his brown jeans and auburn, pointy cowboy boots. His skin was reddish and thinned where I had burned him. I feared he’d yet retaliate. Why not? After all, Zandrons loved to kill and they had no conscience.
I trembled hard. johnny reached down and helped me stand.
I snuggled close against him like a little girl, my forearms crunched against his chest, my cheek over his heart, and my eyes closed to the truth. “He frightens me.”
“Relax,” johnny stroked my hair, “he’s on our side.”
“How can he be? I burned him.”
He laughed a little. “You burned me too, and I’m on your side.”
“johnny, this isn’t funny!” I looked up at him, seeing only his chin. “You told me Zandrons have no feelings, so why would he choose our side?”
His arm circled my back. He walked us toward my favorite tree. “Because our side is handicapped. He, like me, craves challenge.”
“So even with the Zandron, our side is handicapped?”
“Somewhat. You are an amateur, hence vulnerable to Tazmarkian trickery. And the Zandron is less powerful than a Tazmark, yet not unknown to impair one if given a little help. I have waited long to have the odds against me.”
“johnny!”
“What?”
“Don’t talk like that.”
“It is the truth.”
I sighed deeply. “What if the Zandron decides to switch sides?”
“No, that would not satisfy him. His way is to target his victims until they are his. Following through brings him satisfaction. Once they are conquered he may turn on us, but not until then.”
“I don’t get it.”
“You’re a Shen,” he said, “you’re not supposed to get it. Just trust me.”
We reached my favorite spruce tree and stopped. Chord bellowed from the clearing, “Shen, hear me! The Zandron murdered your parents.”
The words landed in my ears like cannon balls. I froze. Breath gone. Chest hurting. Must vomit. Knees weak. Blacking out.
Chapter Nineteen
johnny caught me, holding my limp body securely. “Breathe Jen, breathe.”
I inhaled slowly.
“Keep breathing, just breathe.”
My head spun merry-go-round scenes of the day my parents died—the heartbreak of my being, the nightmare of my life.
After a few minutes, sanity partially returned. I muttered, “I couldn’t have heard right.” I glanced at Chord. My body stiffened. I looked up at johnny. “What did he say?”
“You heard him.”
“He is playing a trick, right?” My eyes glimmered hope.
johnny didn’t reply.
I stepped back. My eyes drilled into him. “You promised you’d never lie.” I sighed heavily. “Did the Zandron kill my parents?”
“Chord’s trying to sway you toward him again.”
My voice softened, “It’s a lie then?”
johnny didn’t answer.
My mouth fell open. “It’s the truth?”
johnny held his palm toward the clearing. Red sparks sprayed around his fingers, then faded. “Chord is going to get you if you keep this up.”
“You can’t expect me not to react to news like this!”
“The Zandron is here now to defend you.”
I shouted, “I don’t want his help!”
“Would your parents want you to refuse it, even if it meant saving your life?”
I lowered my head trying to deepen my shallow breathing. “How long have you known?”
He stepped up to me and stroked my temple affectionately. “You understand now why I chose him as a practice target for you.”
I jerked back from him. “All this time . . . you knew.” I felt betrayed somehow. That information was too important to be withheld.
johnny raised his hand out to the clearing, again disbursing another illusion. I stared at Chord, wondering who truly was the most evil, johnny or him?
johnny grabbed my chin, forcing me to look at him. “I’m fighting for your spirit, Jen. Trust love, as always you have wished you could. Take that chance. Take it. We must stick together now, more than ever. We must!”
I quaked, breathing heavily. “Okay. Okay.” I looked hard into his eyes, almost angrily. “I trust you, johnny. It might be the last thing I ever do. But I trust you.”
I tried to hold back the tears. But when he enfolded me in his arms, the salty liquid exploded with throaty sobs. I wept for a long while. johnny was patient. And he was kind. I wished I had his calm—his deadly calm that could strike or withdraw in an instant.
I raised my head. He manifested a handkerchief and wiped my face dry. I started to look back at the Zandron in an effort to accept him as part of our team, but johnny pushed my cheek against his chest. Hmm . . . . Was the Zandron gloating or something? Whatever the Zandron was doing, johnny didn’t want me to see.
When his grip lightened, I pulled back and studied his face. He smiled faintly, a sign of victory perhaps, pleased that he had succeeded in protecting me from something.
I looked to the field. Chord was gone.
“Where is he?”
“He’s given up on attempting to sway you. And because you took yourself back from him, he has been weakened. He needs to regenerate. Now, he prepares for dusk.”
“Dusk?”
“Yes, when the fight will begin.”
“Begin? I thought it already had begun.”
He shook his head. “Oh Jen, he’s just been toying with you. The real fight will be infinitely more intense. At night, we can extract what we need more easily for there are less conscious thoughts floating around to interfere.”
This would not do. Night mustn’t come—not with a battle anyway. “Why not fight in daylight when you all are weaker?”
“Even if Chord could take us now, he wouldn’t. He has fun and games planned, something big, guaranteed. Tazmarks thrill in drawing the scenario out as long as possible. You know, ‘the play is the thing.’ ”
“Forget what he wants, you should just get him now!”
“Jen. We repress to unleash our potential. Three hundred years for Chord and I. Anticipation has mounted. The time is almost ripe. The fruit will not be picked until its last moment on the vine. Attack now would only yield dodging until dark. It is our nature to fight full force. Worthy opponents are rare. Such fighting is our passion.”
I looked to the heavens and shook my head. “This isn’t happening.”
I gasped when he swooped me up in his arms, angling me close to his body. “Time for a bath,” he said.
He carried me away from the clearing, and away from the Zandron. In just getting away, I felt better. We passed life-filled trees brimming with green bristles and pinecones. Sunrays splashed around the branches. Ah, so romantic. I felt sweet an
d beautiful, despite my unkempt appearance. I wrapped my arm around his neck and kissed his throat softly.
He spoke gently, sadly, “Your origin in the universe is love. My origin in the universe is destruction. But on earth, both flows exist. I’m not content without love and you’re not free without a battle.”
He lowered his head, nuzzling his face against mine as he walked with an uninterrupted stride. My heart melted with joy. Affection. Childlike affection—from a Tazmark, from my johnny. Oh, thank you, Randa. Thank you, after all.
Then he looked ahead as if trying to gather his composure. “My Dragon ancestors mated with humans. That leaves me subject to human emotion. You are an embodied Angel. That leaves you subject to animal drives. We both are left longing for what we do not want.”
“But it can’t all be about chaos. Don’t you think there is a divine reason for you and me coming together?”
“What is divine? There are different energies. Some energies unite. We call those divine. Some energies rip apart. We call those chaos. That is all. But there would be nothing to unite if it was not ripped apart. And those who have been ripped apart, eventually unite, experiencing greater bliss than those who never experienced being ripped apart. Chaos has its own kind of divinity. I wish you would accept that.”
I couldn’t answer. Accepting chaos was still hard for me.
He carried me out into the soft meadow laden with crisscross streams, embedded in the tall reedy grasses. The sun warmed me, absorbing the last chills of death that lingered in my bones. I snuggled happily in johnny’s arms. If my mother viewed us in this light, she’d approve of my prince, certainly. Well, hopefully.
johnny stopped and set me on my feet by a stream with a pool of flowing water. In one smooth movement, he lifted my soiled white gown up to my head with desire in his eye.
I tried to pull my gown back down, embarrassed. “johnny, this isn’t the time.”
“It is,” he said. The gown brushed past my ears and landed on the grass. “I need to take you back . . . completely. I need to break Chord’s hold on you.”
I crouched down and crossed my arms over my breasts. “But what if they are watching?”
The Mark of Chaos Page 28
