“Where?” was all I managed, praying it wasn’t in what was to be my new room.
“Oh no, no....not in the house, don’t worry.” I think she understood my mortified look of dread.
“Oh... well that makes me feel better at least, I was about to think I was going to have share my room.”
“Share your room?” She looked confused about my answer as we made our way back to the house.
“Yeah, rather with a ghost or with you and Frank, ‘cause I think I’d be too terrified to sleep on my own!” We both laughed at the thought.
“Nah, don’t worry, if that ever happened I’d make Frank sleep in your room with his uncle. They would have something to talk about at least... being family and all.” This just made us giggle some more like daft teenagers. It took me back to our naughty days when we used stay up late and we would tell scary stories under our blankets with a torch held under our chins for added affect.
“So where did he do it then?” I asked getting back to the morbid story.
“Oh...well that doesn’t matter,” was all she said and quickened her pace towards the house. This clearly wasn’t the end of the story so I knew I would have to get it out of her later, when Frank was out.
Getting settled in wasn’t hard, as my sister had already kitted my room out with everything. From family pictures by the sea, art I liked, to bedding in my favourite colour. It was the most perfect room for me, being both cosy and void of all memories.
My new bedroom was at the very top of the house on the third floor in the attic which had been converted. There were other bedrooms in the house but this one definitely had the best view, as the window was on the side of the house with the clearing, so I had a personal view of my very own ocean of green. This was why she had picked it she had informed me as she watched Frank carry all my bags up the stairs one handed.
I surveyed my room and looked at all the effort my sister had gone to. It was amazing how well she knew me. There was a pine double bed with deep purple covers and a mountain of pillows to match. A bright purple lamp lay on the bedside table, which even had a copy of my favourite book on it waiting to be read. It had been a while since I had picked up Jane Eyre, but it was most definitely one of my favourites. I just loved the idea of dear plain Jane getting the rich and broody Mr Rochester above the beauty of the wealthy Blanch.
A lump started to form in the back of my throat as the emotion hit me. This was how I dealt with emotions now. Instead of crying I just held my arms tightly across my stomach, with fisted hands and concentrated on how to breathe. My sister had outdone herself and certainly achieved making me feel right at home, no matter how new this all was. At this point in my life, new was good but above all...
New was safe.
Shaking those thoughts from the dark crescent of my mind, I turned back to the room that had a definite charming, homely feel to it. There was even a framed family photo of the four of us. I remembered when it was taken and it took me back to happier times. It was Christmas and it was after we had opened all our presents. We were all excited because my dad had just surprised my mum with an amazing gift for the family, a trip to Florida.
The trip was the first time for all of us in America. It had turned out to be our best family vacation. We did all the usual stuff, Disney, Seaworld and Universal, but this wasn't the only reason for the fun. It was also down to how close we were as a family. We had always been a close family unit but when the stress of my father’s job started to put a strain on my parents’ marriage, we as children learned the true meaning of a happy family life.
Libby and I were sent to live at our grandparents’ house in the South of England for a while. This change was harder on Libby to accept because, of course being older, she understood all too well what this could mean.... the breakdown of that happiness.
I on the other hand, thought of it as a fun holiday by the sea. I loved staying with my grandparents and there were always lots of kids to play with. Cornwall has always been a popular seaside area, so I always looked forward to the summer vacations we spent there. As a family we would stay in my grandparents’ guest house situated at the bottom of their massive garden, but this time it was just Libby and myself, so we had to stay in the their house. We shared a room in the attic, which was cosy and had an old fashioned playroom feel to it. Situated in one corner was my grandmother’s old wooden rocking horse with a real leather saddle and reins. In the other was a beautifully ornate, pink doll’s house, which held tiny old looking furniture to match. We stayed all summer and although I missed my parents, I enjoyed the late nights and seaside treats, ice cream had always been a weakness of mine.
But Libby had never been herself the whole summer, and although my grandparents tried to put her at ease, it hadn't quite worked as well as it had on me, thanks to my sweet tooth and my ability to accept bribes. In the end of course, our parents had resolved their problems and come to get us. Soon after that my father had found a new job in advertising, which turned out to be the making of him. Our family was now back on track and stronger than ever, that was until the next breakdown, which was inadvertently caused by me.
“Well, I will leave you to it I guess, umm.... not that you have that much to unpack,” she said with a smirk eyeing up my two small cases and one holdall. I knew it wasn’t much and although my parents had been more than willing to send all I owned with me, I declined. I think deep down they knew the reasons for it but as with most things in my life, we never spoke about the reasons why.
“Yeah, I know I’ve not got that much, so a shopping trip is definitely in order!” This would make her happy, as it was one of the normal things we used to love doing together before “It” happened.
“Of course, I wouldn't say no to that,” she said before leaving, grinning at the idea.
After it had taken me all of fifteen minutes to unpack I couldn’t wait any longer, I made my way downstairs, grabbing my jacket on the way.
“Hey, it didn’t take you long, wanna cup of tea before you go exploring?” Libby said as she straightened up from the freezer compartment after retrieving tonight’s gourmet meal.
“Nah, I’m good thanks, I won’t be long, I’m sure to be jet-lagged soon.”
“Ok, pizzas will be done in thirty minutes.” With that she went back to preparing the pizza, which consisted of opening a packet and turning the oven onto full heat. Pizzas were about as much cooking as Libby did, if you couldn’t just rip open a packet and bung it in the microwave or oven then it didn’t make the grade with Libby. But Frank didn’t seem to mind too much and as they were both very active people, they could get away without having to watch what they ate. Still this wouldn’t stop me from doing most of the cooking as it was a passion of mine and cooking for three is better than just one. Plus, I knew that Libby enjoyed my food, her favourite was my lasagne.
As soon as I opened the front door two things hit me, first was the cold, it was so cold that it literally took my breath away, turning it into a visible cloud of misty white. The second was how fantastic everything smelled helped by the lack of a polluting population.
I inhaled the heavenly scent of wet wood, damp grass and clear mountain air. I had spent so much of my childhood in the woods, that this smell brought back a flood of memories. Happy times camping with friends, nervous times, like when Johnny Carlson, my first boyfriend kissed me on that camping trip. Then there were the sad times, like when I would argue with my parents (mostly about that boyfriend) and go running to the woods to be alone with my thoughts. But no matter what emotion it was, being there always made me feel better, like an old friend giving me a big hug and telling me that everything will be just fine. Like somehow the elements of the earth knew what I was feeling and worked to ease every crying breath. I would just lose myself in the smells and sounds of the forest, sitting there for hours, knowing it was the one place on earth I could truly be alone…somewhere not even my curse could find me.
Of course it didn’t take long befo
re thoughts about the forest for darker reasons crept their way back, causing me to physically squint my eyes as I moved them back to the locked part of my mind where they belonged. I wasn't going to start thinking about that… not now...not here! I swallowed the hard lump that my body expelled at the bad memories and tried to inhale my new life. It seemed ironic that I was now living in a place that held “New” in its title. Maybe it was a good omen and maybe that’s why Libby had insisted to our parents that this move would be the best thing for me. After all she did know me better than anyone. A smile formed across my face, which was strange, it felt good to smile again having been a long time since I hadn’t needed to fake it. I was starting to agree with Libby’s idea of me coming here.
At the time I had just wanted to make the pain from my mum’s eyes disappear and the constant anger in my father to die altogether. So I didn’t really care where I was in the world as long I didn’t affect the people that I loved around me anymore. I was numb anyway so what did it matter which country my body slept in, as long as it was far from that memory, I didn’t care.
I wandered further along the beaten path made from man’s constant footsteps, walking further away from the house towards the thick wilderness. The ground was making squelching sounds under my boots as the earth was muddy from the fine rain that had started whilst I was unpacking. Another thing I loved was the rain. It just enhanced the feel of the place, the mossy floor sparkled as the sunlight touched it and the trees swayed in the wind that had now picked up.
Then the majestic forest suddenly took on a very different look as the clouds darkened angrily, hiding the sun. The fine rain turned to heavy raindrops that fell to the earth like little water bombs, drenching my hair flat and curling it around my face. I decided to turn back before I got too wet and the dark forest had somewhat lost its appeal. Also I didn't want to get lost. After all I lived here now and there would be plenty of time for exploring and as I didn’t know anyone in this town, I doubted my social calendar would be fully booked for quite some time. Even the idea seemed strange to me, but I needed to “move on” as everyone kept telling me, so new friends were an inevitable part to play.
I could still see the house through the trees but if I had walked any further it would have disappeared, replaced by a green wall of forest. I quickened my pace as the sky started to turn black, and I wondered if there would be a storm tonight. It wouldn't surprise me, knowing my luck it would be the worst one in history. Well, I was just glad that I was jet-lagged. I was starting to feel so tired that I could sleep through an air raid.
The smell of burnt pizza and oregano came from the kitchen as I walked in, only to see my sister wafting the smoke from the oven with a tea towel. This made me giggle and laughter soon followed as she started to blame the oven, but her face soon lost its harsh expression when she heard my laugh, no, shock soon replaced it. Wow, how long had it been since she had heard me laugh naturally, this was silly, she looked like she would cry with happiness. Of course guilt washed over me for what I had put my family through with my comatose state.
She started laughing now, not wanting my pleasure to stop and knowing my weakness for her funny grunting laugh, which just set me off again. This was something we both had in common, only mine unfortunately sounded more like a little pig snorting when I got too excited.
“Well, I hope you like your pepperoni crispy and well... your crusts extra crunchy.”
“You forgot black and cremated,” I cracked and walked over to her to kiss her on the cheek. “It will be just fine. I don’t much like the crusts anyway.”
The pizza could have been made from drywall for all I cared, I was starving. She automatically poured me a glass of milk and handed me the plate. I headed into the living room, having already removed my wet jacket and boots. Frank sat where I assumed was his regular seat in front of a huge flat screen TV with what looked like an American football game on it. I was used to a different type of football, and this reminded me more of rugby but with a lot more padding.
Libby followed in the room about to tell him to turn it over when I shot her a look to say that it was fine, I didn’t mind what was on. Plus he looked like a man possessed, shouting player’s names I didn’t know and calling them a very different name instead. I smirked when he then realised he had been caught by his wife and Libby didn’t like swearing at all. His face now looked like a little boy who had been caught drawing on the walls with a marker or cutting his own hair with toenail clippers.
So, there was one person in this world he did fear then. My small-framed sister stood waiting for the “sorry”, arms folded and pouting lips. She didn’t have to wait long.
“Sorry babe, it’s just this guys a joker, let one right by and well...” he was cut off with just a look and a head tilt in my direction.
“Umm… sorry Kazzy.” A sheepish look on his face made me smile.
“It’s ok, I’ve heard a lot worse,” and that wasn’t an understatement, when I worked as a barmaid I had had to learn to tune it out.
“It’s not alright!” My sister snapped as she took his empty plate back to the kitchen.
When my sister was out of view I whispered, “Its fine really, don’t worry about me being here, you wanna hear it when the Liverpool vs Manchester United game is shown on the big screen in the pub, now that’s swearing!”
“Yeah, I forgot you worked as a barmaid. Hey I think they’re hiring at the club in town, do you want me to ask for you?” Wow, my first day and already the chance of a job. Now that would be getting back to normal (whatever that meant) as I had never really been without a job before.
“Yeah, my friend Jerry manages the place, should be no problem, he owes me one.”
“Wow, that would be great, thanks Frank.”
“Thanks Frank what?” my sister asked, making her way through the door.
“Frank thinks he could get me a job at the club in town,” I said enthusiastically, knowing that Libby wouldn’t see the good side to this.
“What at that…that place? Do you think that’s a good idea?” This was directed at both of us, although Frank got the dirty look that I didn’t. I answered this one before poor Frank was in the firing line again.
“I think it’s what I need, it’s all about a new start and well... a job kinda goes with that, plus you saw my wardrobe right? It’s in need of major help.”
“Yeah, like a transplant,” she said making my chances better. This meant she was coming around to my way of thinking. Clothes, fashion and shopping of any kind always did it.
“Then it’s sorted, I’ll have a word with Jerry tomorrow.” Frank looked pleased with himself saying this last statement, like he had won some epic battle. Libby on the other hand still looked sceptical but refrained from saying anything more on the subject.
By the end of the game I was fighting a battle with my eyes to stay open and they were winning. Libby, having seen how visibly exhausted I was, had gone to my room and got the bed ready for me, taking the mountain of pillows and matching throw off and putting them in the big carved wooden chest at the bottom of the bed. Explaining all the while as she did this that it was nowhere near as cold as it would get in deepest winter, so now I understood the reason for the chest full of extra bedding.
I made my way towards the bed like a zombie not really thinking about my feet and where they were going, it was as if they knew where to find the bed so I didn’t have to think. This was good, as my head felt like sticky mush. I think I fell asleep before my head turned horizontal.
That night my dreams were strange and hard to decipher. I was back in the forest but I was panicking because I was lost. The weather was stormy and wild, producing a downpour that drenched my skin and the cold stung with invisible shards making my face numb. I kept slipping on the muddy ground where twigs and branches tore at my clothes from all angles. I was frightened as I heard the night’s creatures come alive and one sound cut through the storm and caused my blood to freeze.
It was the sound of a large bird calling out what sounded like a warning cry. I automatically ducked and cowered with my arms above my head as it was directly above my shaking body. I couldn’t tell whether or not I was crying still, as my cheeks were both soaked from the storm and from fear. With quivering lips I pleaded, “I want to go home” in a whisper to myself but it was as if someone else heard my frightened plea. I looked up to see a bright glow, light the angry sky and only when I blinked fresh tears back could I make out the purple orb that started to pulsate and grow bigger.
It lit the forest life around where I knelt as it descended and all the black shadows of demons that had surrounded me backed away and began to retreat from the kill they had engaged. My fear doubled at the sight of hundreds of creatures all scuttling backwards like crabs in a desperate attempt to get away, leaving me with no chance of an escape.
By the time I got from my knees it now looked like a huge ball of gas that was effervescent. I could feel the power it emanated like a small sun burning my face in heat causing little beads of sweat to mix with the tears of fresh fears.
At first I was locked into place as my mind generated a mixture of possibilities, but in the end sheer impulse took over and I started to move my feet. It seemed to like this, as with every step I took the more it grew, like feeding from my actions. When I stopped in a mixture of horror and killer curiosity, it spoke.
“Come to me.” The voice was purely hypnotic and hummed in my mind making me move my stumbling feet again.
“Yes, come to me…you belong to me.” I felt my fear melt away with every syllable that flowed from it and into me. As if the energy was surrounding me in a heat source so comforting I could do little but obey. I took the last step before reaching out to touch it, my fingertips so close I could feel the tingle of my blood beneath the skin that covered them.
Afterlife (Afterlife Saga) Page 2
