He came back in less time than Matty would have expected, but then she remembered Fleafarm’s huge litter ten years ago—more pups than faucets. He’d had to fill baby bottles a lot that spring.
He handed her the formula. “Do you know how to do this?”
“I’ll muddle through. I don’t think it’s rocket science.” She took the bottle. At first the baby was too upset and refused to latch on, but gradually she seemed to understand what was being offered and accepted the nipple.
Silence.
Except for George Strait singing a love song and the crackling of the fire, both of which reminded Matty of what had been planned for this evening. She hoped the baby had kept things from progressing very far.
Sebastian let out a heavy sigh. Then he picked up the sheaf of instructions and sat down in a wing chair facing Matty. He flipped through the papers and took out one. “She was born on January twenty-ninth, which makes her almost two months old.”
Matty didn’t have to work very hard to figure it out. Elizabeth had been conceived on or near Sebastian’s birthday celebration in Aspen last year. She looked up from the tiny baby to gaze at him. “You’re quite a piece of work, you know that?”
“What do you mean?”
“Everybody around here felt so sorry for you because you were having a tough time getting back into the dating game after the divorce. They were so tickled that you finally invited a woman over for dinner, for crying out loud.” Matty hadn’t been tickled, but the rest of the valley had seemed overjoyed. “Meanwhile, you’ve been sowing all sorts of wild oats with some fellow avalanche survivor in Aspen.”
He tensed. “I have not been sowing all sorts of wild oats. I’m not even sure I sowed any.”
“Then what’s this all about?”
His face darkened to a dusky rose. “It’s just that I’m not sure. We were all tanked that night, all of us except Jessica.”
Jessica. Matty hated the name on principle. “Are you saying you can’t remember if you used protection?”
“I can’t remember if I made love to her, period.”
Matty hated this subject, but she had to know the truth, and she was growing impatient with Sebastian’s dense attitude. “Look, you probably did. It was your birthday. It’s logical that if you had something going with her, you’d feel like…celebrating.”
“That’s just it. I didn’t have something going with her. We’re just friends. When you survive something like an avalanche together, you see what people are made of. Jessica has guts.” He paused. “Or so I thought.”
“Mmm.” Matty deliberately kept her response neutral, but a woman with guts didn’t desert her baby, in her estimation.
Sebastian seemed to be considering the same subject. Finally he shook his head in bewilderment. “Beats me how she could do this.”
“You still haven’t explained what happened that might make you the father.”
“Well, we really partied that night at the ski lodge—Travis, Boone, Jessica and me. Our avalanche reunion gig, we called it. We’d hoped Nat could make it, but he had some conflict at the last minute. Anyway, Jessica was staying at the lodge, because she works there as a reservation clerk, and we’d rented a cabin nearby, but not close enough to walk. We were so blitzed Jessica drove us home so we wouldn’t end up in a snowbank.”
“And?”
He blushed even deeper. “Well, you know how it is.”
“’Fraid not.”
“We were all flirting with her for the hell of it, acting like guys, but it didn’t mean anything. At least for me it didn’t. She helped each one of us to bed, and I vaguely remember trying to kiss her.”
Matty braced herself. “And after the kiss?”
“I don’t remember anything after that.”
She warned herself not to hope. “Then how can you assume you’re the father of this kid?”
“Why else would she ask me to be the godfather?”
“A million reasons.” Matty couldn’t stem the tide of hope. “You’re a good friend. You’re steady. You have the resources to handle this sort of responsibility. You’re caring. You’re gentle. You’re—”
“Clueless! I don’t know the first thing about babies!”
“So that’s why she sent the kid with an instruction manual.” Matty felt incredibly lighter. Just friends, he’d said. He couldn’t even remember the experience, if there had been an experience to remember. Elizabeth wasn’t the product of a torrid love affair. At the most, she’d been conceived in a passing moment he couldn’t even recall. Matty smiled down at Elizabeth. Maybe this wasn’t such a disaster, after all.
Sebastian watched Matty feeding the baby. She didn’t seem completely at ease doing it, but she appeared reasonably competent. Besides that, she looked very nice with that baby in her arms. Softer, somehow. She’d left her blond hair down around her shoulders tonight—that could be part of it. Usually she kept it tied out of the way with a bandanna, or twisted into a single braid.
He’d always thought Matty should have kids, but Butch couldn’t have them and he wasn’t the kind of guy who’d consider adopting. Butch. Sebastian’s gut always tightened when he thought about his late, great neighbor. He’d considered him a good friend. He’d mourned his death after Butch accidentally flew his Cessna into a mountain.
Unfortunately, for her parting shot, Barbara had ruined his memories of Butch by revealing their long-standing affair. Sebastian didn’t think Matty knew about that, and he wasn’t ever planning to tell her. He wished Barbara had kept the information to herself, except that it made the divorce easier to accept.
Matty had deserved better than Butch, Sebastian thought as she leaned over Elizabeth and looked into the baby’s eyes. Matty had the most honest blue eyes he’d ever seen. He’d trust Matty with his life, he realized with some surprise. He’d never thought in those terms before, and it startled him.
He could count on one hand the people he’d place that kind of trust in—Nat Grady, Travis Evans, Boone Conner…and Matty Lang. Not long ago he might have included Jessica in that number, but this baby thing made him wonder if he knew her at all. Leaving a two-month-old child didn’t seem to be in character with the Jessica he remembered.
Matty was studying the baby, as if to find some clue about her daddy’s identity. Sebastian was plenty curious about the baby’s looks, himself. Now that she wasn’t all red and screaming, maybe he’d recognize something.
Setting the papers on the lamp table, he got up and walked over to Matty. “Can you tell the color of her eyes?” He hunkered down next to the rocker, balancing himself with one hand on the arm of the chair.
“They could be gray, could be blue. It’s hard to tell.”
He leaned closer and looked into the baby’s eyes. They looked disturbingly familiar. Damn, but they could be the same color as his. This little bundle could be his daughter. His. His stomach twisted. This wasn’t the way he pictured bringing a child into the world, abandoned by her mother and thrust upon a father who didn’t know what the hell he was doing.
“What color are Jessica’s eyes?” Matty asked.
He wrestled his thoughts away from visions of doom.
“Um…let’s see. Brown? Maybe brown. I’m not real sure.” He liked the way Matty smelled, he thought as he compared her light scent to Charlotte’s overpowering perfume. Holding Matty wouldn’t force a guy to wear a gas mask. Holding Matty. Now there was an intriguing thought. She’d probably knock him from here to kingdom come. Or worse, she’d laugh.
She turned toward him with a smile. “Well, that settles it. You’re not carrying a torch for this woman.”
“No, I’m not, but why are you suddenly so sure?” It must be the episode with Charlotte that had him thinking crazy. All that kissing earlier in the evening had him looking at Matty’s wide, generous mouth and wondering how she’d be to kiss. Talk about crazy. This was Matty, a woman he’d known for ten years. Maybe he was only seeking a distraction from his morbid thoughts abou
t this kid.
“A man in love knows the exact color of his lady’s eyes.”
“Is that right?” He’d always gotten a kick out of the definite way she put things, as if there could be no doubt in anyone’s mind that she was absolutely, positively correct. He could use some of that comforting certainty right now. “And how did you come to learn that particular fact?”
“I read.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that. There’s a thick book in that box I’d love to have you dig into.”
Her smile faded. “Now, wait a minute, Sebastian.”
He muttered a soft curse. “Sorry. That was clumsy. I didn’t mean to imply that I expected anything more of you than you’ve already done.”
“Didn’t you?”
He sighed and pushed himself upright. “I don’t know what I mean. I don’t know what I’m going to do.” He gestured toward the two boxes. “From the looks of this, Jessica’s not coming back tomorrow.”
“No, I don’t think she is.” She hesitated. “Have you considered…taking her to Canon City and…turning her over to—”
“No!”
Elizabeth jerked away from the bottle and started to cry.
“Oh, hell.”
“You scared her.” Matty tried to get the baby to return to the bottle, but she refused. Hands curled into fists, she beat the air and wailed.
The baby’s cries scratched along Sebastian’s nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard. He clenched his jaw, feeling helpless and inadequate.
“Maybe she has gas,” Matty said. “She probably swallowed a lot of air with all that crying.”
“Well, I can tell you this much, she’s too damned little for Tums.”
“Take the bottle.” Matty handed it to him and lifted Elizabeth, positioning her over her shoulder. The baby kept crying as Matty patted and stroked her back.
“Maybe I should hire a nurse.” The idea of a strange woman taking up residence in his house depressed the heck out of him, but it might be the only solution.
“Maybe.” Matty patted a little harder and gradually Elizabeth stopped crying. Then she let loose with a huge belch.
“My God!” Sebastian stared at the baby.
Matty grinned at him. “Delicate little thing, isn’t she?”
“I doubt Travis could make that much noise, and he’s put in hours of practice.” He smiled back at Matty. He’d become so used to her that he hadn’t really looked at her in a long time. But tonight, for some reason, he noticed that she was a pretty woman. Very pretty.
As she held his gaze, her smile faltered. “Listen, maybe you’d rather have a nurse, someone trained to handle a little baby, but I’d be willing…that is, I know I’m not experienced at this, but if you—”
“Are you offering to help me?” He’d never have had the nerve to ask for that kind of commitment. After all, she had as many chores and obligations as he did. But it was what he’d wanted, without fully realizing it, ever since he’d brought the baby into the house. “Because if you are offering, I’m accepting. I don’t want a stranger taking care of Elizabeth if you’re available.”
She took a deep breath and looked straight into his eyes. “I’m available.”
He didn’t think she’d meant that the way it had sounded. He wouldn’t take it the way it sounded, either. Funny, though, how his pulse had picked up at the thought of Matty being…available. He was turning into a nutcase. He needed to get a grip before he found himself propositioning every woman he ran across.
He cleared his throat. “Thank you.”
3
IF MATTY KNEW any good shrinks, she would be in the market for having her head examined. For two solid years she’d mooned over Sebastian Daniels while he’d remained oblivious. Two years in a row he’d run off to Aspen with the guys for his birthday, and he’d admitted to at least flirting with this woman, even if he hadn’t done more than that. Then for his first real date after the divorce, he’d invited Charlotte Crabtree up to the house, not Matty.
Yet all he had to do was look confused and desperate, and good old Matty Lang came running. Still, she wasn’t willing to let another woman take care of this abandoned baby, especially if it turned out to be Sebastian’s.
“We need to make a plan.” She stood, gingerly supporting this unfamiliar bundle against her shoulder, and started toward the dining room. “But first you’d better dig around and find the diaper supplies and the instructions for changing this little girl’s britches. I’m sure she must need it by now.”
“Where are you taking her?”
“The dining room table’s as good a place as any, I guess, although I’ve never personally changed a diaper. I seem to remember my sister using the dining or kitchen table in a pinch.”
His eyes widened. “You’ve never changed a diaper, either? What about with your nieces and nephews?”
“I refused to baby-sit them until they were potty-trained,” she said over her shoulder. “As far as I’m concerned, kids are more interesting when they can talk, and when they’re old enough to learn to rope and ride.”
Sebastian shook his head as he retrieved the instructions from the lamp table. “I can’t believe I’ve run across two women in the same evening who don’t know any baby basics. What’s this world coming to?”
Matty stopped under the arch dividing the living room from the dining area and turned back to him. “Sebastian Daniels, that sounded pretty darned chauvinistic! I offered to help with this kid, but I’m sure as heck not going to take over the whole job. If you’re not planning to do at least half the work, then you’d better hire that nurse you were talking about.”
“I’ll help, I’ll help! Don’t get excited, now. I didn’t mean it that way.”
“Oh, I think you did. It’s very convenient being helpless at these things, isn’t it?”
“Uh—”
“Well, buster, I’m as baby-challenged as you are, so we’ll learn together. And this time, I’ll be in charge of reading the instructions. You can change the diaper.”
He paled. “Me?”
“You’ll be doing it soon, anyway.” She tried not to smile. “You might as well figure it out right at the beginning.”
“Yeah, but—”
“As my granny used to say, we might as well start as we mean to go on. And I mean for you to change at least half of the diapers.” She fixed him with a determined stare, hoping that she looked tough and uncompromising. Inside she was melting at the endearing uncertainty in his eyes, and the worried way he looked at his big hands, as if they weren’t adequate to deal with a tiny baby girl.
He took a deep breath. “Okay.” He located the box with the diapers inside and tossed the instructions on top before picking up the entire box and carrying it toward the dining room. “Let’s do it.”
She’d never felt more like hugging him. Then he set the box on the table and flicked on the overhead, and her good will evaporated. For his cozy little dinner with Charlotte he’d used candles, which she’d sort of expected. But she hadn’t pictured the vase of store-bought roses sitting in the middle of the table or the good china. And cloth napkins. Damn, he’d gone all out.
“I’ll just clear some of this away.” Without looking at her, he hastily stacked dishes and carried them into the kitchen.
For the first time, Matty registered that someone was missing from the household. The baby had distracted her, but now that the little tyke was dozing on her shoulder, she could take better stock of the situation. “Where’s Fleafarm?” she called into the kitchen.
He came back into the dining room, still looking uncomfortable. “Down in the barn.”
“Why?” She had a good idea, but she wanted to see if he’d admit it.
He flushed, and instead of answering, he crossed to the table and grabbed the instructions from the top of the box. “Let’s see. She says something about a changing pad. This saddle-blanket thing must be a changing pad.” He flopped a quilted pad with ducks and chicks on it across t
he table’s gleaming mahogany surface.
His banishment of his dog made her more indignant than the candles, the roses, the china or the napkins. “What’s the matter? Doesn’t Charlotte like dogs, either?”
“She, uh, mentioned that a dog could sort of…ruin the mood.”
“Go get Fleafarm.”
He gestured toward the box. “I thought you wanted me to—”
“I do. You can be back in two minutes. But it’s cold in that barn, and Fleafarm is getting on in years. I can’t believe you put that poor dog in the barn so that you and Charlotte could play house.”
“We didn’t do a blasted thing, okay? The baby showed up! And I didn’t just drop Fleafarm off at the barn. I made her a real nice bed, with lots of blankets.”
So they hadn’t had time for the planned hanky-panky. In gratitude Matty cuddled the baby a little closer. “I don’t care if you gave that dog twenty blankets. She should be up here at the house. She’s a member of the family, dammit. She probably thinks she did something wrong to make you put her out there.”
“It’s not that all-fired cold.” Muttering under his breath, Sebastian stomped back into the kitchen. He crammed his Stetson on his head and went out the back door. But as if to prove his point about the weather, he didn’t bother with the sheepskin jacket hanging on a hook by the door.
Matty sighed. “Men.” She nuzzled the drowsy baby in her arms. “I can teach you a lot of things, Elizabeth. I can show you how to ride like the wind without falling off, how to quiet a spooky herd of cattle and how to swing the sweetest rope in this valley. But when it comes to men, I don’t have a single bit of advice to give you.”
Shifting the baby’s weight awkwardly so she could pull out a dining room chair, she sat down to wait for that idiot man who was going to freeze his butt to prove a point.
THE NIGHT AIR bit right through Sebastian’s shirt and jeans as he hurried down to the barn. Seeing things through Matty’s eyes, he felt like a damn fool for making Fleafarm bunk down in the barn. But hell, he hadn’t had a date in fourteen years and the process had intimidated him into doing stupid things.
The Colorado Kid Page 3
