by Lola St. Vil
Still groggy, I sit up and look around.
“I was going to carry you to your cabin but I didn’t want to wake you,” he says.
“What time is it?” I ask.
“It’s ten after seven. The sun’s up,” Marcus replies.
“What, we overslept? We need to get going,” I say as I stand up.
“Two things: one, Lucy sent us a picture of where she wants to meet and exchange the Alpha for the team,” Marcus tells me.
“You’re saying the devil texted you?” I ask.
“No, she used instagram.”
“Wow…okay where are we supposed to meet her?”
“It’s an abandoned town in Thailand.”
“Let’s get the Alpha and head there.”
“No need. We already found the third Alpha.”
“What?”
“Well actually, Julian did. He went to go see Dargo on his own.”
“Marcus, how could you let him go by himself?”
“I was Recharging and you were next to me…the next time I opened my eyes, I found him crawling back from the clearing. I jumped to help him. I’m surprised my movements didn’t wake you.”
That’s because lying next to you is the safest I’ve felt in a long time…
“So what happened?” I ask, trying to stay focused.
“Well, that’s when Julian told me he faced Dargo alone.”
“Why would he do that?”
“I think he’s trying to make things up to you.”
“Is he hurt badly?” I ask unable to keep the worry from my voice.
“Tony got to him in time. He’s in his cabin waiting for the mixture Tony applied to take effect.”
“What happened to him in Nowhere?”
“He was attacked by Dargo’s ‘pets.’ Once Dargo knew it was Julian he called the animals off because he wanted to kill Julian with his bare hands. The only way Julian was able to stop that from happening was by offering a trade. The Alpha for Julian’s most precious memory.”
“Now Dargo has that memory?” I ask.
“Yes, he now has it in his head as if it’s his own. And while Julian won’t remember specifics about the event, he will remember having given something precious away. It kind of sucks because he looked really torn up about giving up that memory,” Marcus replies.
“Did Julian say what the memory was?”
“The day you were born.”
I walk into his cabin. All it has is a small bed, a wooden nightstand and a chair. He lies there looking more human than I have ever seen him. His right arm and leg are covered in a silver glowing paste. There are scratches all over his face. He looks out the window in deep reflection.
“So now I know where I got my ‘make dangerous decisions’ gene from,” I say as I get closer to him. He turns towards me and gives me a small smile. I pull up the chair and sit alongside his bed. A wave of guilt runs through me. I don’t know how to say what I need to say.
“Julian, about the poison…”
“I did it all wrong,” he says.
“Did what wrong?”
“Us; you and me. I wanted to protect you from…everything. Instead I ended up causing you pain. So much so you wanted me…”
“I didn’t really want to…make anything happen to you. I was just really in a bad place,” I reply.
“It’s not your fault. It’s mine.”
“I know you wanted to look out for me,” I tell him.
“I wanted more than that. I wanted what Femi had with you: a relationship. I wanted to be your father. I wanted to hear you call me that if just once in my life. When the Goumy resurfaced and you came to me and we actually talked it was…I thought we would get closer. We didn’t.”
“I’m not sure what to say, I’m sorry.”
“I know I interfere in your life. It’s only because you’re my world. You belong to the only soul I have ever loved. I see her in you. And I want to do for you what I couldn’t do for her: keep you safe. That’s why I went to Dargo myself.”
“You knew helping Femi on the bridge would result in complete chaos, yet you did it anyway. Why?” I wonder.
“I had to help her. She was everything to me; even more so than the light. In truth, Femi was my salvation.”
“That’s how I feel about him, Julian. That’s what Marcus is to me: my salvation. And every time you tried to take him away it felt like you were…stealing my breath. I
couldn’t breathe.”
“You sound just like Femi when she talked about me. I don’t know what craziness led her to love me back but she did.”
“Yes and nothing anyone said would stop her from loving you,” I remind him.
“And that’s what you feel for Marcus, huh?”
“Yes. Well, it was. Now we’re…I don’t know what we are.”
“He’s in love with you and every moment he fights to stay focused on the mission. I know that struggle very well. Marcus is losing. He can’t stay away from you.”
“Julian, what’s the ‘Day of Grace?’” I ask.
“It’s a gift given to the First Guardian by Omnis. It allows the Guardian to be human again for one day and to spend that day with his family. The Guardian’s family would interact with him as if he never died.”
“Would a Guardian miss the Day of Grace if there was a battle or some mission related issue?” I wonder.
“The ‘Day of Grace’ is a gift so special, Time, Death and Fate suspended all battle for twenty four hours. There is absolutely no reason to miss that day.”
“Has anyone ever missed it?” I inquire.
“Every single Guardian has had their Day of Grace. All except one. I don’t know who it was but whoever he was; he missed out on the only chance to see his loved ones.”
“When is the ‘Day of Grace?’” I ask.
Julian tells me the answer. That’s when I realize why Ameana said what she said in the recording. I squeeze Julian’s hand and tell him I will check on him later.
“I want to come with you to Thailand,” he calls out as I open the door.
“No, you need to recuperate. And don’t worry about the memory Dargo took. We can make new ones,” I reply with a smile.
CHAPTER NINETEEN:
JUST THIS LAST TIME
(Mature Content)
He opens the door, shirtless with jeans and bare feet. I can tell by the expression on his face; he’s wondering if I’m okay. He’s worried something may have happened. He takes in the scene before him: I stand in his doorway, studying him as if he is new to me.
That’s because he is new to me.
“You gave up your Day of Grace for me didn’t you?” I ask.
He’s about to lie to me. But he takes one look at me and he knows I already know the truth. He has no choice but to come out and admit the truth: he is an Angel even among Angels.
“Marcus, please tell me. Did you give up the only few hours you would ever have with your family for me?”
“It was only a few days after your mom died. I couldn’t leave you; you needed me.”
The level of dedication and sacrifice he’s shown for me surpasses anything I thought any being was capable of displaying. I was pissed and hurt that Bianca got his last name and his Rah. But I was wrong to be mad because his Rah is just a piece of glass in anyone’s hand but mine. I know that now.
I also know the reason I was drawn to Alex; he was safe. He was a safe journey down a predictable path that promised security. The road with Marcus wasn’t a road at all. It’s a series of sharp edged cliffs, shaky ground and pitfalls. So why go with Marcus instead of Alex? Because it’s not where you are that makes heaven, heaven; it’s whom you’re with.
We could die from a power ball explosion searing flesh from our bones, or demons could dismember us leaving only his wings and my eyes; yet when asked how we died, we’d say we died smiling because we died together.
All the silly, stupid and childish arguments we’ve had were just layers of fear we kept
adding so we could escape a truth too powerful to take in all at once: Marcus and I are forever in love.
It’s not the kind of love you read about in books, those end when the words on the pages end. It’s not the kind of love you hear about in songs because those end when the melody does. Our love is cut from the fabric of time. It cannot end because there simply is no end.
I can run from Marcus, he can run from me. But it’s all loops and circles that will always end where we started; together.
Standing here in front of him is different than all the other times. In the past I was the girl who ran because she feared she wasn’t strong enough to see it through. She feared she didn’t have it in her to love him back with the intensity with which he loved her. She was terrified that he’d soon realize she was a just a girl and didn’t know anything about being in love. He would then go elsewhere.
But death makes you grow up and I’ve seen a lot of death. I’ve watched the brave fall when Ameana died and the weak stand up when Eta saved my life. I’ve seen the most hideous aspect of evil when I laid eyes on Lucy’s son Cairo; and now looking at Marcus I have seen the true nature of love.
I will not run away now because only girls run and I am a woman. I will stand here and love him because while he’s not always perfect, his love for me always has been. I have no fear that he will leave me because I now get that I am his everything. And the agony he endured when he watched the hours from his Day of Grace slip away while he held me, lets me know he is also everything to me.
“Emmy, are you okay?” he asks.
“I’m going to make love to you. Then we’re going to save the world. And when that’s done, you’re going to be my husband. Is that okay with you?”
“Yes.”
I enter his room and close the door behind me. There’s no space between us. Our lips are inches apart but we don’t kiss yet. We study each other knowing that once we touch Omnis himself won’t be able to pull us apart. When we finally place our lips together, every cell in my body is ignited.
He craves me with the lust of a human so his kisses are filled with longing and hunger.
But he has the discipline of Angels so he’s thorough and precise. He introduces himself to my body with his lips, tongue and fingers.
Hello, I’m going to be your husband; I’m going to make love to you this way forever…
My head starts to spin; my gravity is gone. My heart wants to leave my body and join his. I lean on the door for support while a current of yearning surges down my spine. Desire gathers between my thighs and impatiently awaits his lips.
He pulls my shirt over my head, unhooks my bra and spells out his name on my bare breasts with his tongue. He fondles, strokes and teases my nipples until they are firm and taut in his hands. He drinks from them as if they were the only spring in a vast desert.
I arch my back and place my hand behind his head. He has full access to the spring. He drinks until I’m so overloaded with pleasure, I start to swear.
In between the nibbling, sucking and licking, we manage to strip each other’s clothes off completely and get on the bed. I go to reintroduce myself to his body but there is no need; it remembers me.
I merely graze his chest with my index finger and his wings start to flutter uncontrollably.
I decide to visit my favorite places on his body with my lips. I say hello to his neck, then his nipples, and his muscular stomach. By the time my lips brush his inner thigh, he can no longer hold his head up. He falls back on the pillow, and groans with pleasure.
Unable to handle the magnitude of desire caused by my touch, he pulls me up firmly so that we are now eye to eye. He smiles devilishly and flips me so that I am now on my back. When he parts my legs I’m shaking with anticipation.
He sends kisses between my thighs that explode inside me like mini orgasm bombs. By the time he adds his tongue and fingers, I can no longer keep my body still. He puts his hands on my hips to keep them in place.
Unable to get away from the heavenly sensation of his touch, I reach out to the wooden nightstand by the bed. As his lips seek shelter between my legs, I dig my nails into the wood and scratch the surface of the table, leaving a trail.
Driven by overwhelming need, I sit up and insert him where I so desperately want him to be: inside me. Sitting up on the bed, our legs entangled, facing each other, we ride towards a wave big enough to consume us.
He doesn’t take his eyes off of me as he inserts himself deeper into me. His strokes are rhythmic, powerful and given the amount of soul he’s injecting into me, possibly deadly.
I take in every thrust because I trust him and because I can’t think of a better way to die than making love to him.
That’s when I realize we’re having both the human orgasm and the angel orgasm at the same time. The Inner Arc and Outer Arc are occurring together. The arc is not happening outside of us. We are actually inside it. He takes on my eye color, I take on his. The force of both lifts us up in a swirl of white energy. But we don’t stop making love: we can’t.
The arcs have us several feet off the ground now. And we don’t care. We could float out into nothing, so long as we don’t let go of each other. He inserts himself yet again and touches a spot so deep in me I didn’t know it existed. Tears fill my eyes and roll down my face as pleasure rocks my body. The same pleasure grabs hold of Marcus and rips its way through him.
When he sinks inside me again, our bodies get swept up in a wave of pleasure so strong, it causes the arcs to swell and they shatter every window in the room. Marcus’s wings cover me as it rains down. We should have gotten clear of the falling glass; we should have taken cover. But that would mean letting go of each other and we are never doing that again…
A little while later, we have cleared away the glass and lie still in each other’s arms. Marcus’s eyes are closed. Every once in a while, he opens them as if he wants to make sure I’m still here and that this isn’t all a dream. I intertwine my fingers with his and rest my head on his chest.
“You should Recharge if you’re tired,” I offer.
“No, I don’t want to miss this,” he replies.
“Miss what?”
“You here with me,” he says.
“Baby, I know how much your family means to you. Thank you for staying with me. And I’m sorry you had to make that choice.”
“Emmy, on my Day of Grace I was with family; I was with you.”
“I should have said something before but I didn’t want you to worry. I’ve been getting headaches; really bad ones.”
“I know.”
“You do?” I ask, puzzled.
“I always keep an eye on you and I think you’ve been getting them since you started seeing the therapist.”
“Wait, you knew about that?”
“Yeah, we had to vet her.”
“Marcus, have you been tracking me?”
“Kind of, are you mad?”
“No, it’s kind of sweet in a stalker kind of way. And listen, I could not have made it through my Mom’s death without you. You keep saving me.”
“We’ve saved each other, now if I tell you something, promise you won’t laugh at me?” he asks.
“Promise,” I reply.
“When Alexi came back at the beach house, I was…disappointed that it wasn’t for us. Is that crazy?” he wonders.
“Wow…no, it’s not. I mean I don’t know if I’d be a good mom or not but you’re the only one I’d want to try it with.”
“You would be an amazing mom,” he vows.
“How do you know?”
“Same way I know we’re done with all the break ups: I just know.”
“Do you think when they talk about us in the Angel world they’ll say ‘Emmy and Marcus were the couple who kept getting it wrong?’”
“Maybe, but we know the truth: we’re the couple who won’t give up until we get it right,” he tells me.
“What if we fight and it gets all crazy again?” I ask.
“I think every time we broke up it was because we had something to learn outside of ‘us.’ And now, we know what we need to know in order to stay together,” Marcus says kissing my hand.
“You’re right. I think I rushed things with Alex so I could say I dated a human and come back to you because I knew it’s where I was supposed to be,” I admit.
“I’m just happy you’re back. You have no doubts?” he asks.
“No. You’re the one I want to get it right with. And if I left you and went to someone else and got it right with him, well it would still be…wrong. You know what I mean?”
“Yes, baby, I do.”
“We’re still gonna argue and get on each other’s nerves,” I warn him.
“Yay, make up sex.”
I burst out laughing as I snuggle close to him.
“I have your engagement ring with me,” he tells me.
“I knew you would. I don’t want it now, let’s get the Shoma together and rescue the team,” she says.
“It’s a deal.”
“I can’t believe I’ve spent the past few hours feeling what I’m feeling. That never happens on these missions,” I say to him.
“What are you feeling?”
“Happy. Crazy, stupid, immeasurable happiness.”
We head out of Marcus’s cabin; we spot Julian a few yards away, gathering the camping gear. He looks much better. Marcus signals for me to look over at the cabins next to us.
Apparently the glass in his cabin wasn’t the only one that broke. The arc was strong enough to shatter the windows in all six cabins.
“Well, are you two finished?” Julian asks.
“Um…yeah, we were just inside talking,” I reply lamely.
Julian raises his eyebrows suspiciously and looks at the glass on the floor.
This is so embarrassing…
Marcus, sensing I’m uncomfortable, changes the subject.
“If you insist on coming along, then we should head out now,” he says to Julian.
