by Linda Mooney
“I do.”
“Good.â�� Deelaht smiled at him, and the sight of it reminded Croat of how much he loved the old woman who had helped raise him after his own mother, her daughter, had died.
“Tell me about Beginners,â�� he urged, knowing she was ready to tell him.
“About every one hundred generations, or so it’s been told, those diluted abilities regather. I don’t understand how, but a single female child becomes blessed with the whole of the Sensitivesâ�� powers, and her abilities are greater and more formidable than anything anyone can imagine.”
“How are they greater?”
“For one thing, her connection to you, and yours with her, can withstand a separation of miles.â�� The woman shifted on her seat and laid a hand on Croat’s arm where it rested on the table. â��By this time you’ve come to accept the fact that you love her, and that your love was not something she caused you to feel.”
He nodded slightly. â��I know that now.”
“When a Sensitive touches the one who will become her lifelong partner, that connection forms. She has no warning it will happen, and neither does he. But when it does, that connection is what bonds them together for life. But a regular Sensitive’s bond with her husband, although it is lifelong, does weaken as the distance between them grows, should the two become separated.â�� Deelaht gently shook her head. â��Not so for a Beginner. Be it a mile, or a hundred miles, you will be as aware of her as she will be of you, just as if you were standing next to each other.â�� She bit her lower lip then added, â��And anything that happens to either of you will be felt by the other just as strongly.”
He glanced down at his hands, remembering the excruciating pain he’d felt when Tora’s hands had been dipped in the boiling wax. When he looked up, he saw Deelaht smile.
“What else makes her unique?â�� he asked, whispering.
“What else? It is the stuff that legends are made of, Croat. Mind you, I have no idea if this is true. Tora is the only Sensitive I have ever encountered. You’ll need to ask her yourself if the stories can bear the testimony.”
“Don’t worry. I will.â�� He waited.
Before she continued, Deelaht rose to refresh his mug of water. He accepted it, but never took his eyes off of the old woman.
“The stories tell of a Beginner being able to project her emotions onto others.”
“How? I meanâ��”
“Without having to touch them first.”
Stunned, Croat nearly choked on his drink. â��What?”
“A Beginner’s powers are so great, she can emote feelings simply by looking at people.â�� The old woman pressed her fingertips to her forehead as she sighed. â��Remember, Croat, this is all hearsay. Legend. It’s been so long since a true Beginner has been spotted, much of what’s been passed down could easily have been elaborated. You will have to ask Tora how much of it is true, and see if there’s anything else she can add or dismiss from the tales. But if just that one ability holds true,â�� the woman emphasized by holding up her index finger. â��If that one ability is within her grasp, then so much of what you hope to accomplish may be feasible.”
If that one ability holds true. Did he dare to hope?
Croat opened his eyes, distracted by the sound of his grandmother untying the string wrapped around the object she’d brought over. He watched as she carefully folded back the brown paper, revealing a gown of the palest blue. Curious, he reached out and touched the fabric.
“It’s silk,â�� Deelaht explained.
He nearly removed his hand in shock. �Silk?� The material was unbelievably soft to the touch.
“It was Ellemar’s. She wore it when she married your father. It was his wedding gift to her.â�� Deelaht smiled again. â��It will be your gift to Tora.”
That simple phrase sent waves of heat throughout his body. Suddenly his need to go to her, to be with her, overrode all other thought. As he got to his feet, Deelaht rewrapped the gown.
“I will keep it here until the day she wears it. Croat…â�� Her strong fingers dug into his wrist. â��Let her guide you. Don’t let any decision you make, or any order you give, interfere with her abilities. We’ve been given this rare chance at freedom, and I am so grateful to be alive to see it come to fruition. Oh! And one more thing.”
“What’s that?”
“Don’t ever deny your feelings for her. Accept her love, and return it tenfold. Let it lead you where it may. Promise me.”
“That will never be a problem,â�� he promised. Croat gave the old woman a quick kiss on the temple before leaving her cottage and heading for his own. In the morning he would gather his people together and let them know what he had planned.
And now, knowing what Tora may be capable of doing, those plans were becoming clearer. He even dared to allow himself to hope.
But first, he had to ask Tora for the truth. And then he needed to love her.
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Chapter 27
Loving
Slowly, silently, Croat opened the door to his cottage, hoping not to awaken Tora. He sensed she was still asleep, and he was thankful the potion continued to keep her under. Otherwise, he was positive the news he’d received from Deelaht would have been enough to awaken her.
Gods, he was exhausted. Not only physically tired, but also mentally and emotionally. Thinking back on the past few days, Croat was surprised to realize how much his life had changed in just one short week.
The cottage was warm. The fire in the fireplace had recently been stoked. Croat walked through the narrow door and into the small bedroom.
In her sleep, Tora had thrown off most of the covers. She now lay on her side, facing away from him. The light of the fire threw red glints into her dark hair. Sighing, he went back into the other room, parked himself in the straight-back chair, and tugged off his boots.
A yawn caught him off-guard. He ran a hand over his face and felt the stubble. A bath sounded like too much trouble at the moment. With his belly full, what he really needed was some rest so he could face the others in the morning with a clear head.
For a moment he debated whether to go into the bedroom and crawl under the blanket with Tora. Unfortunately the steady pounding in his groin refused to let up. Ever since Deelaht had shown him the marriage gown, and mentioned his joining with Tora, the need to make love to her had been increasing in intensity. If he pulled her against him, there was no way he would be able to keep his hands off of her virgin body. No way he could stop himself from taking what he knew she would readily give him.
Even thinking about it now filled his limbs with surging heat.
Irritated with himself, Croat tilted the chair back until it rested against the wall, and propped his feet on the dining table bench. It might be slightly uncomfortable, but it would have to suffice. Still, the thought of Tora lying in his bed was inexorably becoming too much to bear.
He growled softly, or so he thought. A tiny sense of awareness circled his heart. A moment later he heard a voice call out for him.
“Croat?”
He rose and went into the bedroom to find Tora half-awake. She had rolled over in bed and was sleepily blinking at him. But there was no mistaking the loving smile on her face.
“Why so grumpy, pumpkin eyes?â�� she whispered.
Of course. My anger must have awakened her.
Croat gave her a rueful smile. â��Forgive me. I didn’t mean to disturb your sleep.”
“‘S all right.â�� She patted the mattress beside her. â��Come. Tell me what’s bothering you.”
What’s bothering me?
Less than six feet separated them. If he got any closer, his self-control would crumble. She gave him a puzzled look. He knew she was sensing his indecision, but couldn’t understand why.
Or maybe she does, and doesn’t recognize it.
He froze. He had no doubt Tora was a v
irgin. In fact, he had known from the first moment she had touched him back in the dungeon. Her inexperience would prevent her from recognizing his increasing sexual need. She could sense his uneasiness, his reticence, but she couldn’t identify those feelings, nor would she be able to relate to the driving urge that was the cause of them. Not yet.
But once I make her mine, she will know that need.
She’ll know it, and come to recognize it. React to it. Respond to it. And maybe he will be able to recognize her own need in return when it occurs.
Croat felt his body tighten with a vengeance. What would it be like to sense her lust from far away? At the thought of receiving her body’s signals like an unspoken tease, his erection hardened, pushing against his clothing.
He saw her eyes widen. Maybe she was starting to understand.
He walked over and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed. He reached out to graze her cheek with the back of his fingers. Already her eyes were drooping, which didn’t surprise him. Deelaht’s sleep potion was strong.
“Croat?”
“What, my love?”
It felt right, using those simple words. He smiled to himself, suddenly becoming aware of how wonderful it was to be able to call her that, and know that he meant it. Such an ordinary phrase, yet it implied so much.
Tora smiled, either because of his nearness, his touch, or his words, he couldn’t tell. It no longer mattered, anyway. Besides, sitting next to her, being this close to her, was filling him with that wonderful peacefulness he needed.
Without thinking, Croat leaned over and pressed a kiss to her forehead. Immediately he realized it had been the wrong thing to do. Her woman scent filled his head and energized every cell in his body. He sniffed again as he nuzzled the baby-soft hairline. Without realizing it, his hand cupped her jaw and cheek.
It was the most natural thing in the world to kiss her. This time her lips were warm. Soft. Responsive. Impulsively, he leaned over her, brushing her body with his. Even through their clothing, he could feel her breasts. Her breathing had increased. When he pulled back, he found her staring wide-eyed at him. She reached up to touch his mouth.
“My…love?”
She started to say more, but her voice gave out. Tears glittered in her brown eyes.
He could no more ignore the call of her heart than he could ignore his own. Reaching down, he tenderly lifted her head and shoulders from the bed and kissed her again. Slowly. Lovingly. Fighting the raging drums thundering inside his skull, and the pounding beat centered between his legs. He knew his arms were trembling. His entire body was trembling. The fact that he was taking such care with her both shocked and surprised him.
He was not inexperienced. He had taken his share of willing women. He had expected that one day he would find someone he cared enough for to take to wife. She would be dependable, steady, a good mother and a willing partner. Beyond that, Croat had never actually tried to imagine what else she might be, much less what she would look like. And, naturally, he had assumed she would be Lupan.
The strength and intensity of this emotion racing through him left him feeling lightheaded. He never thought of himself as a caring person. And love? He admitted that the feeling, like the word, was important in a permanent relationship. He just never thought it would be like…this. This all-encompassing want and need, to hold and be held, and everything else blending in with it…dissolving into the most perfect happiness he had ever felt in his life.
He felt drugged. Lowering the shoulder of her gown, he bent to kiss the fragrant skin, then followed an invisible trail back to her neck, across skin that glowed like moonlight in the fire’s presence. Skin that beckoned for him to nuzzle and kiss and tease with his lips. Skin that was as soft as the blue silk gown she would wear.
He found the warmth of her neck, where her pulse pounded as hard and as fast as his own. Tora moaned softly. Her bandaged hand slipped from his face to his chest, and for a second he wondered how he was going to be able to stop and leave her alone to rest, when Deelaht’s words seemed to echo in the room.
“Don’t ever deny your feelings for her. Accept her love, and return it tenfold. Let it lead you where it may. Promise me.”
Let it lead you where it may.
Leaning back enough to where he could see her face, he waited for her to open her eyes. When she finally did, he smiled. Her hand continued to move over his chest.
“What?”
“I’m still getting used to the fact that I can feel this way,â�� he admitted.
“About a Sensitive?”
“No. About you.â�� He leaned down to kiss her again, and this time he would not stop. He couldn’t stop. But this time, he couldn’t blame his animalistic nature. This time, the blame could only be placed on his heart.
Despite her weariness, Tora drew her arms around his neck as he lowered her back onto the mattress. Her lips tried to follow his, imitating stroke for stroke, pressure for pressure. When he tentatively wiped her teeth with his tongue, she did the same, and for a brief moment the tips touched and gently caressed.
Behind him the fire popped, sending a wave of heat into the room. He felt sweat break out over his skin. At the same time, he noticed similar beads of moisture on hers. Leaning further over, he slowly licked a few salty droplets from the side of her neck, letting his tongue slide over her incredible skin. Her musk was indescribable, yet it affected him to the point where he could barely bend over. The fire’s heat had been sucked through his skin until it filled his engorged erection, blistering it from the inside out. The pressure to find release was becoming dominant, insistent, and unavoidable.
Tantalizingly, he kissed the delicate skin as her breathing tickled his ear. He pulled down the other sleeve of her gown, just enough to reveal the cream-colored shoulder. Carefully, he nipped it, and was rewarded with chill bumps. Croat laughed throatily and blew a puff of warm air over her skin.
“Croat?â�� Her voice was a mere whisper in his ear.
“What, my love?”
“Are you…are you going to…”
He paused to sense her. She was afraid and still weary. Yet she was also calmed from the influence of the potion she’d drunk. But he could tell her needs were rising and gathering like clouds before a storm. She wasn’t holding back, although it was clear she had no idea what to do next.
“I want to,â�� he admitted. â��If you don’t want to, just say so. But I need you, Tora. I need more than your touch or your kisses.â�� He paused, still leaning over her bared shoulders, waiting for her answer, when in truth he didn’t know if he actually could stop now. His heart was thundering in his head. His arousal sizzled along his skin, making him ultrasensitive to her responses.
He was never aware of his shifting back into Lupan until she gasped. Lifting his face, he looked down at her and saw her eyes riveted on his muzzle.
“Are you…must you…”
Her fear was palpable, surging through her veins as fast as her blood. Yet, Croat could tell it wasn’t his visage that made her silently plead with him. It was still the strangeness of it all.
This was her first time, and she was human. He couldn’t take her this first time in his bestial form.
Slowly, Coat reverted into his human self and gave her an apologetic smile. â��Forgive me. My natureâ��”
“I understand,â�� she quickly told him. â��Maybe at another time I can…accept you…when you’re Lupan.”
Croat felt his whole body almost lift off the floor with her words. She hadn’t asked him not to ever change when they were in heat. She wanted him to give her more time to grow accustomed to it. Which could only mean she was planning on staying. On giving him her life and her future to share with his. He felt his throat constricting as the hot rush of tears burned in his eyes.
Tora’s breathing never slowed. He felt her touch his hair, then his own shoulder.
“Teach me? To accept you?”
The simple request was eno
ugh to break down the last of his reserves. Rearing back slightly, Croat looked down at her, into those wide brown eyes that could read his every emotion as clearly as if they were written across his face.
Accept her love, and return it tenfold. Let it lead you where it may.
Heeding Tora’s silent plea, Croat bent to kiss her. As he nuzzled her lips, seeking her inner sweetness, she opened her mouth, wanting to learn all she could. Wanting to reciprocate.
Gently mouthing the corner of her smile, he moved over her cheek, then under her jaw. He could hear her pulse as much as feel it as she tried to clutch him with her bandaged hands.
With more kisses to the neck, he let his lips slide over skin that trembled in his wake. When he finally reached the hollow of her throat, he was besieged by the richness of her scent gathered there.
The simple gown she wore had no buttons or fasteners. The short sleeves could be slipped over the shoulders and down the arms, but the whole neckline wouldn’t go over her hips. There was no way he could take it off of her except to pull it up over her head, the same way it had gone on. Sitting up, Croat grabbed the bed linens and jerked them to one side. Tora gasped in surprise at the sudden exposure.
He smiled. â��Did I startle you?”
“A bit. Is it…”
He stopped from reaching for the gown. â��Is it what?”
“Is it always so quiet? To love someone, I mean. To make love to them.”
Always so quiet? It took him a moment to understand what she meant. â��Do you mean, is there any talking when two people make love?”
She nodded as she lifted her arms. It was then he realized he was drawing her gown up over her head. When the garment cleared her hair, the dark tresses tumbled down until they nearly covered her. He reached over and brushed the hair away from her small but beautiful breasts. Her nipples, now growing taut from expectation and the chill, were light in color. Succulent. His mouth almost watered to taste them.
Croat stared at the thinness of her ribs, and the truth about her past came back to haunt him. She was definitely malnourished. It was a miracle she was as healthy as she was. Her thighs and legs were equally bony. The juncture between her legs was in shadow, but the scent emanating from her was beginning to make his head swim.
