by Ann Collins
Kayla received what felt like a life sentence, becoming a ward of the state, and being shuffled from one foster home to another. The day she turned eighteen, she’d been emancipated, and she’d been on her own ever since. Though she didn’t have much of a support system, at least she had some peace.
Now sitting in bed in her tiny apartment, her eyes filled with tears, Kayla thought about how much it ached to remember. Her past held a whole lifetime of pain, and some days Kayla realized that she wasn’t sure if her future held anything but more pain. She felt alone, trapped in the cycle of memory and sorrow, as if she could somehow find closure by exploring the past.
She reached over to the bedside table and opened the drawer. Inside was a business card and a number she had often contemplated calling. She ran her fingertips over the raised print.
Richard Dawkins, Private Investigator.
Why did she even want to know where her father was? Why did she even care? She assumed he was beating up some other woman, treating her as though she was trash, and using her paychecks to buy his alcohol. She knew that a tiger didn’t change its stripes.
So why did it matter?
Kayla couldn’t exactly figure out why it did, but she knew that at some point, she needed to face her father. She deserved closure, and he was the only person who could give it to her.
She reached for the phone. She didn’t feel ready to make this call, but then again, would she ever be? She had been sitting on that card for over a year and she had yet to use it. Who knew? The guy might not even be around anymore. Kayla was still trying to talk herself out of it even as she dialed the number, and she was startled when someone actually answered on the first ring.
“Ummm…hello. Mr. Dawkins?”
“That’s me. What can I do for you?”
He sounded surprisingly young. Kayla took that in for a moment, and forged ahead. “I am actually looking for someone…I’m looking for my father. He should be pretty easy to find, but I’m not sure that I want to go through the channels myself…I don’t want him to know I’m looking for him.”
“I’m sure you have your reasons for that, Ms…?”
“My name is Kayla Moore.”
“Okay, Ms. Moore. I will be more than happy to track him down. What do you want me to do with the information once I find him?”
Kayla sighed. “I haven’t given that much thought, to be honest…I just know that I want to keep this confidential. He can’t know about it.”
“No problem!” The man seemed to be entirely confident. “Would you like to meet me somewhere tomorrow to talk about exactly what you want and what I can do to help you get that?”
Kayla smiled. This was easy so far. “Yes, please.”
“How about meeting for coffee? There’s this nice little place on the east side of town…”
He kept talking, giving her directions, but Kayla new right away which spot she was talking about. It was the same place she and Dyson had enjoyed an early dinner, where they had seen the couple getting it on in full view of the street.
“I can be there,” she promised.
“Good, Ms. Moore. Bring as much information as you have. I’ll see you then!”
When Kayla hung up the phone, she was flooded with emotion. Did she really want this? What would she do when she found him? Would he ever talk to her in a way that would give her the answers she needed? What would he think of her now – would he still be filled with contempt? Would she remind him of her mother? What would he…
The phone rang. Since it was still sitting right on her lap, she was startled and almost dropped it to the floor. She fumbled with it and answered on the third ring, sure it was the investigator calling back with a question.
“Hello?”
“So you’re awake, you sexy thing, you.”
The sound of Dyson’s voice filled her whole body with heat. She closed her eyes and savored the rush. “Dyson,” she finally said. “You called.”
“Of course I called. A promise is a promise.”
Kayla wanted to keep the warm feelings from last night, but now that she was thinking of her father, it was tough to focus on Dyson. She was happy to hear from him, but she wanted to just be alone with her thoughts.
“How is your day?” she asked, not sure where else to start.
“Good. Busy, though,” he said, and sure enough, he did sound rushed. “Listen, Kayla, how would you feel about lunch tomorrow? I know you might have classes, but I have a day off, and I thought it would be nice…”
“Lunch would be perfect.” She smiled into the phone, heart pounding and her father almost completely forgotten.
“Really?”
“Really.”
She hoped he wouldn’t say anything about the night before. She thought about the kisses, his hands on her body, and the way he felt when he pressed up against her. Everything he had was present and accounted for in that last kiss, when he pushed her up against the wall and showed her just what he wanted. She blushed hard at the thought.
“Okay, then…I’m glad! Remembering the conversation she had had just before Dyson called, she backtracked a bit. “Oh, but wait! I have an appointment at noon. But after that, we could meet. Say, around one?”
“Around one sounds great. Should we go to the same place we went to yesterday? The one with the umbrellas and the exhibitionists on balconies?”
Kayla laughed. “Maybe we can see another show.”
“Here’s to that!” Then Dyson became very quiet, so quiet that she could hear the sounds in the background. It sounded like he was at the gym. “I had a great time last night, Kayla.”
“You did?” she asked. “Even with the drunken girl hanging on you all night?”
She could almost hear his smile through the phone line. “That was the best part.”
Then there was another noise, this one louder, and Dyson cleared his throat. “Okay, so I have to go…but tomorrow, right? Around one at the usual place?”
The usual place. The implications of that made her heart sing. Try as she might to push away thoughts of having someone special in her life, Dyson was finding his way around the wall in her heart. She liked that he was doing it without even really trying – it was just happening. What a wonderful feeling!
“The usual place,” she repeated, and they said their goodbyes.
She listened to the silence for a moment before she hung up. She suddenly wished she had someone to share all this with. A friend, a pet, even a counselor.
A mother.
Kayla dropped the phone onto the bedside table and rolled over on the bed, pulling the pillow to her face. How she could go from elation to such sadness was beyond her, but it was happening. She let out a sob as she thought about the things she couldn’t share with the one person in the world who would have cared the most.
***
But that night in bed, she wasn’t thinking about anything but Dyson.
He danced relentlessly through her dreams, appearing here and there, until he finally came to stay. Even though she woke a time or two, each time she fell back to sleep, he was there, as if he were waiting for her. In her dream he hadn’t walked away the night before but instead had come upstairs to her bedroom, where he looked around the room for a long moment, taking it all in before he turned to her.
“So this is where you dream about me,” he teased.
Kayla took one step toward him and looked up into his eyes. She put her hand on his chest and felt the heartbeat there, moving faster than it should have been, showing her how much he wanted her. No matter how much he teased and tried to play it cool, that heartbeat didn’t lie.
Her hand still on his heart, he leaned down to press the softest of kisses to her forehead, her nose, cheeks, and finally her lips. She melted into him, the whole length of their bodies coming together.
There was something else that didn’t lie, too.
Bolder in her dreams than real life, Kayla reached down to touch him through the denim of his jeans.
He sucked in a deep breath and pushed against her hand. He was hot and heavy, filling out his jeans in a way that made her own breath come faster. She slowly pulled down the zipper and slipped her hand inside. He wore cotton boxers, warm from the heat of his body, and she felt the whole hard, hot length of him through the thin cotton. She looked up at Dyson, a seductive smile on her face.
He ran his hands over her hips. “Do it. Please.” he said, hoarse with desire.
Kayla unbuttoned his jeans for better access and reached inside his boxers, aching to feel his bare skin.. He shuddered and let out a long, low moan as his eyes drifted closed. Kayla felt the surge of power, the sweet thrill of bringing a man such pleasure and knowing that the pleasure had just barely begun. She watched Dyson’s face as he opened his eyes again and smiled at her.
“My turn,” he whispered, as he reached for her.
He made short work of her blouse, untucking it with one tug and running down the buttons until he could slip the shirt from her shoulders. Holding her at arm’s length, he drank in the sight of her in her favorite black bra that made the most of her curves. Pulling her back toward him, he unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans in one quick motion, and before she knew it, he was slipping her jeans from her hips.
While he admired her, Kayla took the opportunity to reach for the hem of his shirt and pull it over his head. Though she’d seen him shirtless at the gym, his muscles nearly took her breath away. Before she was even close to being finished appreciating the sight of his lean, beautifully defined abs, Dyson scooped her up and deposited her gently on the bed, where he wasted no time in climbing on top of her.
She opened her mouth to voice her disappointment – he was moving way too fast! – when he gave her a wicked grin and started to kiss his way down between her breasts, stopping to play with each nipple for only a single frustrating moment before he kissed his way down her belly. She realized where he was going and sighed, lifting her arms above her head, ready to give herself over to the intense pleasure she was sure a man like Dyson could give her…
The moment his tongue touched her, Kayla arched toward him and uttered a groan. The thrill of it coursed through her like slow lightning, sending a tingle up her spine. She reached down and ran her hands over the muscles in his arms, savoring the feeling of each ridge and curve as she writhed under the pleasure of his tongue.
“Dyson,” she said, over and over again, until it was a litany of pleasure. He didn’t let up, didn’t even slow down, and she was soon right on the verge. She begged him not to stop, begged him to keep going, begged him to do this forever and ever and ever…
Kayla woke up covered in sweat, heart pounding just as she climaxed in real life with a shout and a shudder. As her breathing slowed, she tried to hold on to the delicious sensations of her dream that had seemed so real that she could almost taste Dyson on her lips.
Though Kayla wasn’t a complete stranger to pleasuring herself, she had never been brought to orgasm by a dream. It had been so powerful that she felt both elated and drained, and a little embarrassed at how loud she’d been. The walls of her apartment were so thin that she was sure her neighbors had heard her cry of pleasure, and realizing that she simply had been unable to control herself, Kayla dissolved into laughter – the deep, satisfying laughter of release. Realizing that she couldn’t be held responsible for her wanton behavior in her dreams, she decided to just enjoy the aftermath.
One thing was certain: Dyson was definitely getting to her.
Chapter Nine
The next day, Dyson woke up long before his alarm, and the first thought on his mind was Kayla.
She wasn’t the kind of girl he typically dated. Dyson had always been a looker, and that meant he was blessed in a way that only the luckiest of men were – he effortlessly attracted women, and he was always in control. Though some of his acquaintances would complain about dry spells in which the only action they saw was with their own hands, Dyson had never found it difficult to find women who were all too willing to share his bed. Even women who claimed to never jump in the sack right away tended to change their tunes when Dyson turned on the charm. Dyson knew that it would have been easy for him to be a player and abuse the trust of the women he spent time with, but he was always scrupulously honest. He didn’t lie, and he never made promises that he had no intention of keeping. He was honest, even when that meant telling his partners that he wasn’t looking for a serious relationship. He’d slept with a lot of women, but Dyson was a thoughtful lover, and when the relationships had ended, his partners left satisfied and unable to complain about the time they’d shared with Dyson. Though a few had moved on reluctantly, they couldn’t complain that Dyson had treated them poorly.
Women enjoyed Dyson, and he certainly enjoyed finding women to share his bed, but that was as far as the relationships ever went. He never let a woman get past his physical charms to forge a deeper bond. He was definitely emotionally unavailable, and the first time a woman had used those words on him, he had immediately agreed. He was friendly and kind and courteous, but when it came to emotional depth, he didn’t let anyone see what he was really like. Dyson wasn’t particularly conflicted about his choices. He knew that the distance he put between him and the women in his life was intended to protect him from rejection.. He knew that women liked what they saw on the surface, but once they knew who he really was – once they knew what he was capable of doing – would they really be as enamored with him?
He was almost certain they wouldn’t be, so he had never bothered to find out.
But this girl…Kayla was something different.
Though he wasn’t sure how much she knew about him, he was pretty sure she was the kind of girl who did her homework. And even if she didn’t, he learned through the long day at the animal shelter that Kayla believed in giving second chances. She might have dealt with one hell of a childhood, but she had a sweetness about her that said those experiences hadn’t broken her. Even so, she understood what it meant to be through hell and back.
Dyson thought that maybe, just maybe, she might be the one woman who could see past the stigma of his past and look toward a future that he hoped would be bright.
He smiled up at the ceiling as he thought about it. Maybe that’s why he was okay with moving slowly. Since Dyson had wanted to avoid emotional entanglements, he’d gotten down to business and wasted no time getting horizontal with his one-night stands. Kayla was a whole different story. He was surprised to find that he was not just willing to tolerate a slower pace, but he actually looked forward to drawing out the anticipation of making love to Kayla. Making love – rather than getting laid – was new ground for Dyson, but he thought he might be ready.
When Dyson thought back to the kisses they had enjoyed the night he walked her home from the bar, the way she moved against him, the way she grabbed his hair and pulled him closer to her, the way she had kissed him with everything she was worth, holding nothing back…he questioned how long he’d be able to keep his desire in check. All signs indicated that Kayla was liable to go off like a firecracker the moment she completely opened up and let him in.
“In every sense of the word,” he murmured, and grinned mischievously.
Ever since their date, Dyson had been on a sexual edge that was both delicious and frustrating. He would have given anything to take Kayla to bed that night, but he wouldn’t have been able to live with himself if he had done that. The walk back to his car and the drive home had actually been painful because of the his hard on, and he could hardly wait to get home and relieve his sexual frustration – not once, but twice. Both times, it had been Kayla’s face and Kayla’s body that he’d fantasized about, and he couldn’t help but add the excitement of pleasuring her in a public place like the couple they’d watched on the balcony.
Dyson was surprised how often he thought about Kayla and how often he imagined her in a variety of ways – dressed up in a dress and high heels, in a sexy little scrap of lacy lingerie, or even just in the jeans
she’d been wearing when he met her – perfectly fitted and molded to her curves. When he awoke, she was the first thing on his mind, and as he slid his hand under the covers to reach for his morning erection, he wondered about what she wore to bed, what she looked like without a stitch of clothing on, and what he would do to her once he had her that way.
Oh, he had plans for that. The only problem was deciding which plan he wanted more than the others. He closed his eyes and tried to pick a scenario, but all of them seemed so delicious that he wanted to combine them all into one long, slow night that would fulfill every fantasy he had ever had about Kayla. Since he couldn’t have it all – yet, anyway – he settled for the visions in his head of her on her knees before him, looking up at him with those eyes that fixed him and made it impossible for him to even think about looking away.
He imagined her opening her mouth and teasing him with it, while touching herself at the same time, and the sight of her slipping her finger inside herself threatened to make him come before the fun even started. He watched as she licked her lips and gave him that particular grin of hers, the one that he already knew so well – the one that said she had a naughty streak inside her.
Then she leaned forward and took him into her mouth with slow licks and kisses, taking her time, taking more of him into her hot, wet mouth until he was buried deep. He imagined her tongue swirling in circles, just the way he liked it. He could envision her gliding up and down, looking up at him while she did it, her mouth full and her eyes wide.
Soon his breath was short and his body was tense. His hand moved faster and faster, and then, finally – he closed his eyes and imagined Kayla bringing him right to the brink, then taking him all the way in when she brought him to climax and made him come hard, right into her mouth…
Dyson did come hard, gritting his teeth, his hand pumping furiously as he went over the edge. His breath caught. His chest heaved. He lay tense and hard on the bed, until finally it was over and he slowly relaxed. He took deep breaths while his body calmed down and his mind stopped thinking about dirty things – for now, anyway.
