by Alice Ward
The water pattern changed, and the hiss of a shower curtain closing signaled that she was under the stream. We’d showered together in St. Thomas, so I knew how she looked with water streaming down her very well.
“Talk to me, Journey.”
“Um… I’m washing my hair.”
She was losing interest. If I was honest, so was I.
I was more of a visual creature. And I needed to go upstairs and take a shower myself. Maybe rub this erection she gave me off and take a much needed nap.
“Journey, I’m going to let you go now, darlin’. Let you get ready in peace.”
The shower curtain hissed open and her voice was clearer. “I’m s—”
“Don’t apologize again, darlin’. We went into this thing with both eyes wide open. We know what it is and what it isn’t. You have fun, and I’ll be seeing you soon.”
“Yes. Soon. Bye, Nash.”
“Bye, darlin’.”
Then I did exactly what I intended. I went upstairs, took a shower, and rubbed one off.
But when I laid down on the bed, I didn’t sleep.
At all.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Journey
“Oh. Ohhh. Oh my goodness. Ohhhh.”
Grant smiled as I lowered myself into the Saratoga Springs mineral bath, but to my amazement, the hot water didn’t sting between my legs as I sank into the depths.
“This is amazing. I think I’m cured.”
He pulled me to him, turning me until my back was to his front. “Good. Maybe I can make you sore again tonight.”
I snuggled back against him. “Yes, please.”
I now officially had another plane trip under my belt, even if it was just a short flight upstate. I also had another hotel stay, another massage, and now, a second dip in the mineral water that we’d also enjoyed last night.
True to his word, there had been no sex, but there had been much fooling around. But the best part was just talking to Grant. The things he did were so interesting. I didn’t understand the stock market stuff, but the buying of buildings and renovating them into something new was such a wonderful thing. When I learned that he was in the process of buying Miss Johnson’s building, I cried. And he’d just held me while I did so.
“You better stop,” I’d told him as he wiped my tears away. “You’re being romantic.”
“No romance for you. I’m just being a human Kleenex.”
But he was romantic. And sensitive. And kind.
I’d read about his business reputation and that he was considered “cutthroat” in that world. I didn’t see that part of him. Well, I hadn’t seen that part of him. I didn’t know how things would be when he tired of our… contractual agreement.
I turned in his arms and wrapped my legs around his waist, pressing my lips to his. “Thank you for bringing me here.”
“You’re very welcome.”
“Let’s see. We’re going to dinner with your friends later, then what?”
He frowned, and I lifted a hand to smooth the wrinkles on his forehead away. “Can you stay with me tonight?”
I was about to automatically say no, thinking that I needed to be up early for the senior center. Then I remembered that I didn’t work there anymore and wouldn’t have my first home health patient until one.
“I’m going to miss them.”
He kissed my forehead. “Who?”
“Miss Alpha and Miss Madge. Miss—”
“Miss Dorothy?”
I swallowed and nodded, tears burning again. “Even her.”
Grant pulled me tight against him. “You have a big heart, Journey. I think it’s your best feature.”
Snuggling into his neck, I inhaled his scent. “Why does a woman’s perfume last like twelve seconds, but a man can go through a zombie apocalypse and still smell like his cologne?”
He chuckled. “Is that your subtle way of telling me that I wear too much?”
I nuzzled my nose closer, until it was smashed into his skin. “No. It’s perfect.”
His arms closed around me so tight that it became hard to breathe. I didn’t complain, I just took shallower breathes. Oxygen was overrated compared to this.
As he held me, I wanted to ask him how he felt about me. I wanted to tell him how I felt about him.
Of course, it would be helpful if I could define that for myself first.
The thing was, I was afraid to ask. Afraid to bring the subject up. Plus, if he was okay with me dating another man, wasn’t that answer enough?
I needed to just not think. I needed to live in this moment.
Bells rang, and I’d learned from last night that they signaled that our mineral water session was over. When I didn’t let Grant go, he stood, taking me with him.
He was so strong, so powerful, and it seemed to take no effort for him to carry me this way to the dressing room where I’d shower, dress, and get ready for our flight home, and the dinner to follow. I tried not to read too much into the fact that he was introducing me to his friend. He could do this with all the women he had contractual arrangements with.
By this point, I knew I was just acting silly, and with a deep exhale, I loosened my grip on him and slid down his body.
“See you in thirty?”
I smiled. He was beginning to know me well. “Yes, thirty minutes should be plenty.”
Grabbing a towel off the rack, I wrapped it around me as I stepped into the luxurious dressing area. It reminded me of the Egyptian baths in the old Cleopatra movies, with shiny white marble and gold fixtures everywhere.
Closing and locking the door behind me, I turned to find my bag. Beside it was a pale blue dress. There was a note:
This is officially not romantic, but I saw this dress and thought of your eyes. I look forward to seeing if it matches as closely as I believe it will. -G
Damn. If this man ever did become romantic, no girl would ever have a chance. Lifting the dress, careful not to get it wet, I carried it to the mirror. Yes, it was an exact match. And I couldn’t wait to wear it. Oh… and the matching shoes!
Hanging it back on the hook, I hurried through my routine, showering quickly and washing my hair, smoothing a wonderful jasmine scented lotion over all of my skin.
My makeup didn’t take more than a few minutes, though I did play up my eyes a bit more than usual and slid some of the shimmery nude gloss that Jay had given me over my lips.
My hair normally took forever to dry so I dealt with it next, trying to replicate the way the stylist had used the gigantic brush to give it some body. Looking at my phone, I’d already taken longer than I’d anticipated and only had five minutes to dress.
The dress was a dream, the finest of silks in a deceptively simple cut that fell from thin straps, hugging my body elegantly. It took me a few moments to figure out where all the straps went in the back, but it was worth it as they draped down almost to my ass.
The shoes were Jimmy Choo, and I hugged the icy blue metallic strappy sandals to my chest, hoping I could walk in them without falling. After I’d admired them for an appropriate length of time, I slipped them on, adding Miss Alpha’s bracelet to my wrist.
And I was ready.
No… first, I twirled like a princess, then I was ready.
Grant was on the other side when I opened the door. His entire face shifted, tightened, flared… it did something when I appeared.
“I knew it.” I gave him a twirl, slower this time, giving him lots of time to examine the back. “Exquisite.”
I took the arm he extended, then remembered. “Oh, I need to get my things.”
He kissed the top of my head. “They’ll be right behind us.”
Sure enough, an employee scurried in and had my bags placed on a little cart, then gathered Grant’s, and we were ready to go.
“Thank you for the dress and shoes. I don’t have words to describe how beautiful they are.”
He smiled down on me. “I don’t have words to describe how beautiful you mak
e them.”
Melt.
This man was like a physical assault on my heart.
The plane ride back to the city went quickly, and it felt like I’d barely taken a sip of the Cristal before the wheels were on the ground.
Wayne was waiting, and he smiled widely as he held open the door. “You look lovely, Miss Journey.”
I widened my eyes. “This old thing?”
He was still grinning when he closed the door behind me. In just a couple of weeks I’d grown fond of him. Fond of everything that came with Grant Sommerfield.
The drive was slow, the traffic being its usual unbearable self. Grant pointed out properties that he owned as we drove past. Properties he was interested in. It was fun to see the city through his trained eye.
“Do you think your friend will like me?” I worried my lips and made myself stop before I ruined the lipstick.
“What isn’t there to like, Journey? I’ve been around you a number of times, and I’ve yet to find anything that isn’t perfect.”
Does that mean you want to keep me?
The question invaded my head, but I managed to keep it from escaping my mouth.
Divert. Divert.
Not him. But me.
“Where will we be eating?”
“Ray is cooking so we shall be dining in.”
I mimicked his formal tone. “We shall. And whoever, or is it whomever, is this Ray chap?”
He laughed. “Do I really sound like that?”
I lifted his hand to my lips. “You sound perfect. Listening to you talk makes me smile.”
His nostrils flared. “To answer your question, Ray is my chef. He’s married to Anne, my housekeeper.”
Memory flared. There was no one in the apartment that I saw Friday night, but I thought I remembered Wayne telling me something about Grant rescuing his cook and housekeeper from a shelter the day we dropped Jazzy off to catch her bus.
I decided not to ask because I wasn’t sure if Wayne would get in trouble for divulging that type of information, and second, because we pulled up next to Grant’s building.
I’d only been here once, and I was excited to be back. I was greeted warmly and by name by both the doorman and the front desk staff, which was pretty impressive considering they’d only seen me on Friday night.
The elevator opened at exactly the correct timing that we didn’t have to even pause before entering. My belly rolled as it started up, not stopping until we were on the very top floor.
When we were inside the beautiful space, I was once again in awe.
“Will you think I’m silly if I ‘hills are alive’ twirl around your penthouse in my new dress?”
The chip in his tooth winked at me. “Only if I can videotape the spectacle.”
I stuck out my hand. “Deal. Then you can watch it to remember me by when I’m gone.”
His hand froze against mine. This time, what I was thinking had slipped past my vocal chords before my tonsils could beat it back down my throat.
“Gone? Where are you going?”
Should I divert, or should I be honest? I wasn’t sure.
I stepped closer to him, making sure he could feel me. “Well, Mr. Contract Man. I can only assume there will be a day when you kick me to the curb.” I smiled to soften it, unsure if I needed to.
Suddenly unsure of everything.
But this…
His lips closed on mine, his fingers digging into the skin. Our tongues fought and danced, unable to know if this was war between us, or peace.
My mind... melted. The brain that had managed a near four-point-oh grade point average in college, and that was always greedy for more information, more details, simply collapsed onto itself until there was nothing left but the limbic brain that told my heart to beat and my lungs to breath. And it told me to have sex… to procreate… to populate the world and ensure the survival of humanity with this man.
The primal rawness of the need was what made me pull away. It was also what made me cling for more. The pure unexpectedness of this bone deep yearning that made every cell in my body simmer.
“Whoa… shit, man. I’m sorry for interruptin’. I didn’t know y’all were back so soon.”
I stiffened in Grant’s arms. I hadn’t heard footsteps approach us.
With just the first word, I knew who was behind me. I knew who Grant’s best friend was.
It was impossible, but here it was.
Because I knew it would be the last time, I pressed my lips to Grant’s, and twin tears seeped from the corners of my eyes.
He was frowning as I moved away, his beautiful eyes searching mine.
Then I turned.
And my two worlds collided.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Grant
I wanted to shout at her to stop.
I wanted to shout at him to go.
From the moment Nash came barreling down the steps and tossed out his apologies, I’d known.
I’d known from the way Journey had stiffened in my arms. I’d known from the expression in her eyes. I’d known when she pressed her lips to mine as if she was kissing me for the last time.
Things would never be the same.
As if her legs had turned to water, she sagged backward and would have fallen had I not supported her from behind. Her heart was that of a cornered rabbit. It was pounding so hard and so fast that I could feel it beating in my own chest.
The words were unnecessary, but I cleared my throat, choking down the bile that wanted to escape. “Nash, this is Journey.”
My very best friend in the world ran a hand through his hair before meeting my eyes. “Yeah, man. Dammit. I know.”
A bubble of air escaped Journey’s mouth — a laugh, a sob, a combination of every emotion a person could feel.
“I didn’t know.”
The words were so soft they barely registered, but I understood. Over her head, I looked at my friend. He just gave his head a little shake. It was clear he was asking the same question as me.
How had this happened?
When her legs gave and I took more of Journey’s weight, I scooped her up into my arms and carried her over to the sofa.
“Will you pour her a brandy?”
Nash was already heading to the bar before all the words were out. He not only poured the requested brandy, but two tall glasses of scotch for us as well.
I took the brandy and held it to Journey’s lips. She sniffed, wrinkled her nose, then took a tentative taste when I forced the issue. She coughed, spit, and sputtered, but at least she was doing something besides looking catatonic.
I spoke to Nash in a low voice. “Go ask Ray and Anne to leave everything as it is. Tell them they have the rest of the evening off and to please not disturb us.”
He nodded and headed to the kitchen, and I took the moment of privacy to turn Journey’s face until she looked at me.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. You did nothing wrong here. Nothing. Can you hear me?”
Her eyes met mine for a fleeting moment before she shook her head. “I… I don’t know how this happened. I can’t be this person. I can’t separate friends. I would have never…” Tears leaked past the rapidly blinking eyes. “I… don’t know what to say.”
If a lion’s claw had ripped through my heart, it wouldn’t have been shredded any more than it was while witnessing Journey’s anguish.
Setting the brandy down, I gave her a different type of warmth by pulling her close to me, tucking her under my arm. “Journey, I don’t know how this happened either. I knew Nash was seeing someone. He knew I was seeing someone. We never went in-depth about anything. Hell… we’ve barely seen each other in the past few weeks, and if either of us had done something so simple as open our mouths and said your unusual name out loud, we would have known it was you. But we didn’t. So, here we are.”
Her trembling began to ease, her breathing not such a rapid in and out. “What does that even mean, Grant? We’re here where?”
�
�This place.” I pressed my lips to her hair. “And it will be okay.”
She pulled away and turned until she faced me, the lights catching the shine of her silky blue dress. “How? How is this okay with you? I’ve been sleeping with your best friend and you don’t even seem to…” She searched my face. Searched for some word. Settled on, “Care.”
That pissed me off. “I do care. I care for your happiness and you seemed happy with our arrangement. I set aside any personal feelings in order for you to live life as you choose. I never judged you or asked for more.”
She blinked at me and stood. “Well, maybe that’s the problem.”
It was my turn to blink, to stand. As expressive as her face was, I couldn’t read her now. “Spell it out, Journey. Describe this problem in exact detail so I can understand what’s in your head.”
“She wants you to care about her, dickhead,” Nash said, coming back into the room. He made his way around the sofa, coming to stand behind Journey. When he put his hands on her shoulders, she turned into his arms, her body shaking. I just stared.
Wanting to punch my fist through a wall, I picked up my scotch instead, tossing back the entire contents even as I headed to the bar for more.
My teeth squeaked from where I was grinding them together so hard. Nash was running his hands up and down her back, his lips in her hair, saying things I couldn’t hear. I tossed another inch of scotch back. Damn. He cared for her too.
And she returned his affection. It was clear in the way she leaned into him.
She cared for us both because that was who she was. A good person. A caring person. Loving and sweet and…
Dammit. Why did this hurt so fucking much?
As I stood and watched my best friend comfort and soothe the woman I’d allowed into my heart, I felt like that boy in the water again… in shock, unable to believe everything happening in front of him, not knowing how to make it better…
“It’s my birthday,” I whined. “I only get to turn thirteen once. I want to ride by myself.”
My dad frowned at me. “It would be nice if you’d share.”
I looked over at my pesky little brother, who was giving me his patented ‘I’m going to get what I want and you can’t stop me’ smirk. I gave him the evil eye and he stuck out his tongue. What a little asshole. I had to share everything with him.
