by Tiana Laveen
“I’m glad you brought that up Sheila – my career,” Antonio said as he slipped on some athletic ankle socks. “I’m going back to medical school. I’m finishing this time.”
“You could work here after your classes!” Sheila begged.
“We can work around your schedule.”
“No, I’ve had a good run here. I’ve made more money in this time frame than I could have anywhere else. I need to do what I set out to do. I thank you for this opportunity, but I can’t be a porn star anymore.” Antonio walked off the set, leaving Monica and a stunned crew behind. Sheila spat.
“That ungrateful little shit! We made him! We made you!”
she screamed.
“Sheila, stop it!” Lisa demanded. “Can’t you see? He’s in love, like we are. You and I stopped for the same reason. We got behind the camera instead of in front of it. This isn’t the
’70s anymore. We made this business. It’s bigger than ever, and Antonio left us with two movies that’ll make more money than all of his others combined, but more importantly, he finally found someone, someone he could trust.” Lisa hugged Sheila then turned away to continue signing time sheets. Monica slowly walked to her dressing room. When she opened the door, Antonio was sitting at her vanity. His robe was half open, and he was holding his head as if he were nursing a headache. Monica closed the door behind her and began to turn on the light.
“No, please leave it off,” he said quietly. She walked over to him and pushed a chair up.
“How did you know that I broke off our relationship because of the work you were doing? I never told you.” She took his hand.
“It wasn’t terribly hard to figure out. I thought about why you wouldn’t answer your phone.
I thought about why you moved away and didn’t tell me, and I finally put two and two together. To confirm my idea, I came to work early one morning and asked Daisy if she’d seen you. It was just a hunch. She said she hadn’t since you ran out of here crying. I figured out you’d seen me on the set with someone else and couldn’t take it. Monica, I expected more from you, but since you haven’t been in this business long, you don’t fully understand it,” he explained.
“Expected more from me? What woman in her right mind would want her man sleeping with other women?” Monica yelled.
“I expected more because you knew what I did coming into this. It was no big secret. You don’t think I thought about the fact that eventually, you were going to be paired with Bruce, Ryan, and these other guys? I felt just as bad, but I understood it was your job. The stuff I’ve been subjected to here lately – my God. You have no idea. You should have heard the shit they were saying about you when you first arrived. They didn’t have an inkling I was falling for you, so they let it all out. They were itching to get their chance to fuck you. I was constantly being questioned about how you felt and tasted. I had to keep it cool because I didn’t want anyone to know my private feelings. I’m sitting there with them at the bar after a shoot and have to hear about how they want to be the first to fuck you up the ass. Word got around you don’t do anal, so that became a new bet – who can get Monica to take it in the ass first? I had to hear about
‘Black pussy” this, “Black pussy” that and had to be quiet and take it. You have no idea what it was like. I wasn’t complaining to you because – well, this is our job. This is what we do. If you happen to fall in love with someone in the industry, it comes with the territory.”
“Why did you quit tonight then?” Monica sucked her top lip and rubbed her arms.
“Because I love you. Because I don’t want you to hurt anymore. Because it’s just time for me to go. Because Simone deserves a father figure in her life who’s not going to go away or do things that cause her mother pain. I’d be no better than Brian if I continued to do this knowing the consequences aren’t physical prison, but emotional prison. She deserves better.”
Antonio hung his head.
“It’s no longer just me anymore. I have to think about you and that little girl.” Monica got up and hugged Antonio, kissing him on the cheek.
“Are you really going back to medical school?” she asked.
“Yes, I am – locally this time. My previous school loans are paid off, and my credits will transfer. I have enough saved up to live the same lifestyle for at least two years. It’ll only take me a year to finish, though, and then I can either join a practice or start my own.”
“I made good money here. I got a new place. Now I’m worried since I’m going to quit, that I won’t be able to keep it all,” Monica sighed.
“Well, you have one of two choices: I can pay for you to stay there for a year until you’re out of school, or you can move in with me,” he offered. Monica straddled his lap, kissing him on the neck.
“You really want Simone and me to live with you?” she questioned apprehensively.
“Yes. Eventually we’ll get something else, but I think it’d do for now. I want you to finish school. I think I’ll hire you as my nurse,” he chuckled.
“Oh, is that our next home movie? The dirty doctor has his way with the naughty nurse?” Monica laughed.
“Sounds good to me!” He kissed her chin, then her nose.
They laughed and hugged, squeezing each other tightly.
* * *
Three months later…
“OK, close your eyes.” Antonio blindfolded Simone and Monica. He ushered both of them towards the back of his apartment. He removed the blindfolds.
“Ahhh!” screamed Monica. Simone jumped up and down and ran inside the bedroom.
“Oh, Antonio! Look at her room!” He had turned his guestroom into Simone’s bedroom. All of her favorite cartoon characters were represented. There was a built-in bookshelf and purple flat panel television. One wall was accented with a muted lavender. On the bed was a large, golden book. Simone walked over to her purple canopy with matching chiffon and picked the book up. “The Princess and the Frog”! It’s you, Prince Naveen!”
she smiled.
“You like it?” Antonio asked as he swooped her up into his arms.
“Yes, I do! I love it!” She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek.
“Well, that’s just the sweetest kiss a guy could ever get from an adorable little girl. I think you made sure I didn’t turn back into a frog with that one.” He placed her on the ground.
Simone laughed and started pulling out her new toys.
“Antonio, you didn’t have to do this! I bought her a bunch of new stuff already!” Monica protested.
“I know, but she can have both. We can put that little purple television that she already has in the hall bathroom. I always wanted to watch football in there,” he laughed.
“You’re spoiling her! You really are going to be sorry about this!” Monica smirked. Antonio kissed her.
“I doubt it!”
* * *
Fifteen months later…
“Oh, the house is just beautiful!” Monica’s mother exclaimed.
“Thank you, Mom. Antonio should be home any minute, and we can start dinner.”
“Oh, don’t rush him. He has new little patients! I’m so proud for you, Monica. You have your degree, Simone has a great stepfather, and you’re out of those projects,” her mother smiled.
“Yes, Mama,” Monica sneered, rolling her eyes and grinning.
“Ahhh,” Monica groaned.
“What’s wrong, Baby?” her mother questioned.
“My stomach has been hurting really badly the past couple of days,” Monica said, holding herself.
“Did you eat something that upset it?” Monica’s mother ushered her to a chair.
“I don’t think so. I’ll be right back.” Monica went into her new grand-scale bathroom. The water faucets were of premium quality. The whirlpool tub was made of white marble, and the shower had a porcelain floor.
“It’s so lovely in here. It’s a shame I’m about to throw up!”
She held her stoma
ch and vomited in the toilet. She coughed, took out some Listerine, and rinsed her mouth. She heard her mother talking to someone, then heard footsteps approaching the bedroom.
“Hi, Baby,” Antonio said, taking off his jacket. “Whoa, what’s going on in here?” he asked, wrinkling up his nose.
“Oh, Antonio, I feel awful.” Monica slumped down on the bathroom vanity chair.
“Well, let the doctor take a look.” He took her temperature.
“When did you start feeling ill?” he asked after he saw her temperature was slightly elevated.
“About – about two weeks ago. I was at work and got dizzy, but this stomach stuff’s new.
They had me work that double shift again and I just figured…”
“You dismissed it instead of telling me, as usual. I told you I really don’t want you working those double shifts anymore. I work long enough hours for both of us. Just do your forty hours and get out of there. I know you want to, but it’s really affecting you negatively.” Monica nodded in agreement. Antonio got up to get her some water, then froze.
“What?” Monica asked, wiping her forehead.
“I’ll be right back. I need to get something. Here, drink this water.” Before Monica could respond, he was gone. She nursed the glass of water. He returned ten minutes later, out of breath holding a rectangular box. He opened it up and handed the contents to her.
“What’s this – a pregnancy test? Oh, that’s ridiculous, Antonio. I’m on the pill and haven’t missed a day in years! Not one day. We said we weren’t going to have a baby for at least another year.” Monica rolled her eyes.
“Remember when you were sick about six weeks ago?”
Antonio asked.
“Yes,” she answered.
“You were on antibiotics. I know you know as a nurse what antibiotics can do to birth control pills, Monica. They can weaken them so they’re either not as potent or don’t work at all,”
Antonio said matter-of-factly. The color ran out of Monica’s face.
“Look, Baby, finish your water. I’m going downstairs.
Simone’s in her room playing. I’ll keep your mother company.
I’ll get the food plated up, too. Come down when you’re ready.”
He left, closing the bedroom door behind him. Monica walked to the toilet and pulled her pants down. She urinated in the tiny disposable cup then put a few drops onto the stick. Turning her back towards it as it took, she thought about what was going on six weeks ago.
“We were just moving in. I had gotten a terrible cold and took antibiotics for about three days. Antonio wanted to ‘break the house in’ even though I kept telling him I wasn’t feeling well. He convinced me by saying that we only get one chance at our first night here. Simone was at Mama’s until we got her room set up. We made love on the floor. We only had a blanket and pillow since our new furniture wasn’t here yet. It was so romantic. It had to have been then,” she thought to herself.
Monica decided to wait to look at the results until after dinner. A few minutes later she came down the steps. Antonio looked at her from the corner of his eye while he poured the drinks.
“How you feelin’?” Monica’s mother asked. Before she could answer, the doorbell rang.
“Oh, that must be your mother and sisters, Antonio.”
“Yeah, finally! Late as usual.” He walked briskly to the door and let them in. His mother, a stout brunette with thick hair and alluring green eyes came in boisterously and full of cheer.
Two of her daughters, Antonio’s sisters, were in tow.
“Hello, Monica! So nice to see you again!” She gave Monica a hug and kiss and was about to turn away when she suddenly stopped.
“Oh, my God – you’re pregnant.” Monica’s eyes grew larger.
“What?” Monica said.
“Mama always knows,” said Gina, Antonio’s youngest sister as she brushed past her and took a chilled glass of wine from her brother.
“Oh, my God! Why didn’t I think of that?” exclaimed Monica’s mother. Antonio stood back smirking, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I’ve always had this gift. I know it when I see it. It’s all over your face. Not only that, I think I know when my grandchild’s in the room, and trust me, he or she’s here!”
“Well, did you take your test, Monica?” Antonio asked softly as he took the salad from the refrigerator.
“Yes, but I haven’t looked at it yet. I was going to wait.”
Monica rolled her eyes at him.
“No need – you are, but if you want confirmation, go upstairs.
We’ll wait!” Monica laughed as her mother-in-law reminded her of Marie Barone. Simone came out of her bedroom.
“Mommy, is it time to eat?”
“Just a minute, Baby. Actually, why don’t you come upstairs with me?” She took Simone’s hand as they made their way to the master bedroom, closing the door behind them.
“Simone, Mommy needs to ask you something.”
“OK,” Simone said with a big smile on her face.
“You and I are going to find out an answer to a very important question together. But before that, I want to know how’d you feel about having a little brother or sister?”
“Oh, I’d love it! I want to be a big sister. Babies are so cute!
Are you and Prince, I mean, you and Daddy having a baby?”
Simone jumped up and down.
“Well, I don’t know. Here’s what I want you to do. There’s a white stick on the bathroom sink. On that stick’s a little bitty picture. That picture will either have one blue line or two. I want you to look at it. Then I want you to come out and tell me how many lines are on the stick, OK?”
“OK!” Simone said happily. She ran into the bathroom.
Monica waited in silence. Simone came back out with a sad face.
“What’s wrong, Baby?” Monica asked.
“It has two blue lines. That’s bad.” Monica busted out laughing.
“No, Honey, it’s not! That means Mommy’s pregnant!”
Simone screamed and jumped up and down. Monica went into the bathroom and grabbed the stick. She looked at the two blue lines and smiled. She and Simone went down to the dining room.
Everyone was seated and waiting with anticipation.
Monica opened her mouth to speak, but Simone blurted,
“Mommy’s pregnant!” Happy screams and claps came from around the table. Antonio walked up to Monica and hugged and kissed her. His eyes welled up with tears. Monica had never seen Antonio cry, not even at their garden wedding.
Simone looked at everyone and said, “I’m going to have a little brother or sister.”
“You sure are!” said her maternal grandmother.
“Grandma?” Simone said.
“Yes, Baby?”
“Do you know where babies come from?” Simone asked.
“Well – um – well – I think you should ask your mommy that, Honey.” Her grandmother blushed.
“I was going to tell you just in case you didn’t know, Grandma. Mommy and Daddy got the new baby by doing ‘the nasty,’” Simone smiled. Everyone erupted in laughter except Monica.
“Simone!” Monica snapped. “Baby, you’re not supposed to say things like that.” Simone shrugged.
“I’m sorry.” She picked up her glass of milk nonchalantly.
Antonio laughed and ushered Monica into the foyer.
“You’re everything I could have ever dreamed for, Monica.”
He embraced her while everyone laughed and talked. “First, you give me the courage to go back to school by loving me so much.
Then you give me a wonderful daughter. And now we’re going to have a baby. I love you so much, Honey.” He kissed and hugged her again. Monica smiled and looked around.
“This is a real-life fairy tale – a real-life dream come true,”
she whispered to herself. “Please don’t let me ever wake up.”
* * *
“The Br
ide in Red”
“I make my living by defrauding people,” Stanley relayed to Arashi Takahashi, his psychiatrist.
“I can’t go on like this. The pressure’s mounting.” Stanley rocked back and forth in the chair, teeter-tottering on the heels of his Kenneth Cole shoes. His green, bloodshot eyes shifted nervously from side to side. The thin red veins were prominent against the glossy white sclera.
“How does alcohol affect your feelings of distress?” Arashi asked calmly, crossing his legs at the ankle.
“I told you. It takes the edge off,” Stanley shrugged.
“Stanley, what’s the worst case scenario – you quit your job?”
Arashi leaned in, placing his index fingers together under his chin.
“I’d lose everything that I have – everything I’ve worked for.”
“OK. I want you to think about this for our session next week.
Think about what you can personally do that’s not job-related to define ‘Stanley’ and feel important.” Stanley looked puzzled briefly then said ‘yes’ as if an invisible light bulb had turned on.
Arashi stood up and shook his hand.
“I’ll see you next week at 6:00PM, OK?” Stanley nodded, picking up his briefcase and heading out of the door, closing it softly behind him. Arashi flopped down in his russet leather chair and swiveled. He looked out the large window from his fifteenth floor office. He turned back towards his computer and logged onto his email.
“New mail,” he said in a self-whisper.
To: Arashi Takahashi
From: The Basement DJ aka Morris Beckman Date: September 17
Time: 6:12PM
Arashi-
Julia’s friend’s in some sold-out urban ballet concert tonight.
Guess who has tickets? That’s right. We’re all going. You have to go. It’s Friday – live a little. You haven’t been out in weeks.
Give me a call.
Morris
Arashi yawned and hit “delete.” He picked up a pile of papers and thumbed through various files, organizing them. His office phone rang.
“Arashi Takahashi speaking.”
