by Mariah Dietz
“Didn’t you play soccer?” he asks. I don’t respond to his rhetorical question as I get loose and swim back to the other side of the shallow end for defense.
Jameson swims toward us with the ball and Kendall goes to guard him while Landon guards Jenny. I get the impression they’re either working to completely throw this game, or they’re testing me to see my reaction. My latter thought is confirmed as Jameson stares at me until I make eye contact with him. He gives me a mischievous grin and tosses the ball to Max, still keeping his eyes on me as they turn expectant, and then he winks.“Show us your D, Ace,” Jameson calls.
I feel my head shaking as I approach Max giving him a couple of feet as a buffer. His limbs are long enough that I know if I get too close, he’ll just go around me in one fellow swoop.
“You look nervous, Ace,” Max chides with a grin.
Just pretend it’s Kyle. Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Max looks at me and the furrow of his brow tells me he’s trying to figure out what I’m thinking.
I wait for him to move, but he doesn’t.
At all.
I let out a small sigh and take a couple of steps toward him. He grins, but still doesn’t make any attempt to move. I roll my eyes in an exaggerated fashion and get a little closer. A small chuckle makes his chest shake as he takes a step closer to me so we’re nearly touching. I raise a hand, setting it on his forearm palming the ball, and he lifts his opposite arm and places it on my waist.
“Come on, where did your big game go?” he teases.
My lips pull up in a smile against my will, and I shake my head again. Max’s smile turns up to the nth degree as he takes another step closer so our bodies barely graze. He leans forward, pressing against my body to the point I have to lean into him so I don’t fall backwards. It’s impossible to pretend he’s Kyle at this point. I glance down to ensure my bathing suit hasn’t betrayed me and still covers all necessary parts before I shove against the weight he’s continuing to administer.
Thankfully, he passes the ball over to Jameson, where Kendall practically leaps on top of him.
“That’s how you play defense,” Max says with a nod of his head, making my grin go lopsided as I try not to laugh.
The game continues and is easily the most physical game to ever take place in this pool as everyone crashes into one another, holding onto arms, backs, legs, waists, and nearly every other body part. I think Kendall has resigned to the fact that we’re going to lose and seems quite giddy about it as she hurls herself onto Jameson’s back once again.
We’re down by six, and the competitive voice inside my head begins to throw a small tantrum for the laziness I’ve exuded the entire game, not managing to ever get comfortable participating in this aggressive standoff. Jameson goes to pass the ball to Jenny, and I jump for it and unexpectedly crash into Max, who hardly seems affected as he holds the ball above me with a teasing grin.
I grip his arm and attempt to pull it down, quickly realizing it’s a miracle we’re only down by six when he doesn’t even flinch. Max reaches down and his fingers constrict on my thigh as he lifts my leg, hitching it on his waist. My lungs and heart have both forgotten how to work as I feel his arm rotate below me, grasping my other thigh with his hand precariously close to my backside, and he jumps in the air. I clutch his shoulders so I don’t fall back and hear Jameson and Jenny cheer, indicating he scored.
“You’re such a show off,” I say with mock disgust, still clutching his chest.
He lowers his other hand and wraps it around my other thigh, holding me against him in what can only be considered an intimate position.
“We win,” Max says, squeezing both of my thighs in his hands. My own rest against his broad shoulders, interrupting the intricate design covering his left shoulder. My eyes travel his face, taking in his short, dark hair, and long fringe of eyelashes that glisten from pool water. My attention drifts across his cheekbones that are nearly sharp to his lips curved up in a smirk. My eyes flash up to his as his intake of breath reminds me of how close we are. His gaze follows me, making me feel shy and a bit uneasy by the intimacy of this moment.
He seems to sense my discomfort as he slowly releases his grip and I slide against his wet torso, intently working to ignore that our bodies are pressing tightly against one another leaving little to the imagination.
Jameson thankfully breaks the discomfort as he plunges into the pool, drenching both Max and me as we move to uselessly shield ourselves. Jameson surfaces with a hoot and holler as he wraps his arms around Kendall.
“I told you so,” he sings.
The four of them decide to go inside and watch a scary movie. It’s just an excuse for Kendall to sit on Jameson’s lap, but I don’t give them a hard time about it, nor does anyone else after all of the effort he’s put into trying to get close to Kendall. Max and I stay outside where we lie in the grass, the warm evening air drying our skin as we sit in a comfortable silence.
It amazes me that a little over a month ago I hardly knew Max, and now we’re so close.
“I’m glad we’re friends,” I think aloud.
“Me too.” His voice is soft, making me turn to look at him. He’s staring at the sky, the corners of his mouth relaxed. “Why are you trying to read my mind?” he asks, turning to look at me.
I smile at him. “Sometimes it surprises me how well you seem to know me. Generally people can’t read me as well as you do.” Max looks at me, taking in my words.
“I know,” he replies simply. He turns and looks back at the sky and the silence returns.
“You should break up with him.” Max’s words catch me by surprise. Since his comment at Maggie Lou’s, there haven’t been any instances that have come close to clouding the waters, making me question if what he’d said was some perverse joke. I focus on the stars as my mind races with how I should reply. “You seem happier when he’s not around.” This comment is a curve ball. I anxiously wait to see if there’s more, to know what’s going on between us. “He’s kind of an ass.” His words and tone make my lungs deflate. He sounds like my sisters.
Silence settles between us again.
“I don’t think we’ve ever really taken it all that seriously,” I say in an attempt to evade any more questions.
“Then what?”
I divert my eyes from the freckled sky to look at Max; I can only see the outline of his profile again.
“What do you mean?”
Max turns his head to face me and his eyes meet mine. There’s a seriousness that I can feel behind them, and I don’t even know how I know this. Nothing and everything seems different with the way he’s looking at me. “After the douche is gone, who’s next on the long list of Ace admirers?”
I blink several times and turn my attention from his to lighten the mood because I’m pretty sure I’m starting to hallucinate from all the chlorine I swallowed tonight. “Lately I keep hearing I’m dating the wrong kind of people, people that aren’t my type.”
“Oh yeah, who do they say is your type?”
You. The word is on the tip of my tongue. I can hear it ringing in my ears, and I’m both shocked and a little disappointed it doesn’t leave my mouth. I shake my head to get the thought out and lift my shoulders in a shrug, focusing on an airplane flying overhead.
I look back over at Max and hold his stare a moment. My hand begins to itch with the need to reach out and touch him, to feel the rough stubble along his jaw.
I clear my throat and feel the familiar pull on my lips as I look up to his eyes that still appear serious.“What about you? What’s next for Max?”
“You.”
A meteor crashing down from the sky would shock me less than his admission. I feel my eyes widen slightly as I swallow, reminding myself to breathe as my eyes dance across his face, half anticipating to see a smirk, or a gleam in his blue eyes to tell me that he’s joking. He continues to stare back at me stoically.
“You’d get bored of me,” I admit.
“I think I’d
be anything but bored.”
I don’t know if it’s the darkness or his admission that makes me suddenly feel brave as I continue to keep Max’s stare. He reaches out and gently cups the right side of my face, his thumb lightly gliding across my cheek so soft it’s a whisper.
“Ace!” Kendall calls, opening the patio door as I pull back, feeling my heart thrumming in my neck. “Guess what!” She races over to us and drops to her knees.
Her smile slides from her face as she turns her head looking from me to Max. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! Pretend I wasn’t here!” She stammers, standing up.
“Woo hoo!” Jameson’s yell penetrates the night air as he jumps into the pool creating a colossal wave as the others follow him outside, cheering.
Landon sprints over to us. I’m still focused on Max’s words, and feeling his touch that I’m slightly startled to feel Landon grab my hand, pulling me to my feet before he grips my waist and hauls me up into a fireman hold. The pool is barely visible before we slice through the water.
The next morning Max and I go running. Things seem to have slightly transitioned between us as we hold one another’s eyes longer than necessary and gently brush against one another, not offering an apology as we do.
When we get back, Max stands in front of me, his chest heaving from our last sprint. “What are you doing today?”
“Jenny and I are heading to an art gallery that she’s trying to get featured in this morning. Then I’m supposed to go see Eric.” Max nods, as his jaw visibly clenches. “What about you?” I ask.
“I don’t know, I need to sort through some boxes, figure out what I’m going to be bringing to San Diego.”
“It’s coming up quick,” I reply lamely.
“Yeah.” Max rubs a hand down the back of his head as he takes a couple of steps back. “Alright, well, I’ll see you.”
“Bye, Max.”
Jenny takes the opportunity of being alone together on our ride home from the gallery to discuss what’s going on in my love life. After the boys had left last night the three of us had dissected and exhausted her on-again, off-again relationship with Paul, and she seems eager to learn what’s happening with Eric and Max. I explain to her that I’d been planning to end things with Eric today at lunch until he canceled on me. Jenny is more excited about the fact that I’m finally ending things with Eric than Kendall, as she’s confident that Max likes me, and I confide what had occurred the night before.
She’s a ball of animation, talking a mile a minute, as she discusses how I should break up with Eric as soon as possible, and how I need to tell Max.
“There’s lover boy now!” she says with a smile. I follow her eyes to Max’s house and see him in his garage, doing something with his motorcycle.
“Hey, Max!” Jenny yells, working to catch his attention.
“Hey,” he returns. Jenny gives me a gentle shove as she makes her way into the house.
“What are you doing?” I ask, slowly walking up the driveway as he turns his attention back to his bike.
“How was lunch?” I hear the contempt in his voice and realize I need to explain what my intentions had been and should have when I’d mentioned it. It just seemed too obvious at the time, and I didn’t want him to get the impression that I was solely breaking up with Eric because of him.
“Um, it didn’t happen,” I reply, taking the last couple of steps closer to him.
“Isn’t that a shame.”
“I want to go for a ride one day.” I’m slightly taken aback by my own admission. Max looks up at me with calculating eyes. He watches me for a good minute without saying anything and then shakes his head.
“What? Why? Do you think I’m going to scratch her or something?”
“Because everyone would see up your dress.” Max’s response is teasing, but his tone lacks any inflection as he tosses a grease rag at me, hitting my cornflower blue sundress before it falls to the garage floor. I laugh uneasily and bend over to pick it up.
I take a deep breath through my nose and dig my fingers into the rag. “I wasn’t going on a date with Eric today. We were meeting for lunch—”
“Max!” My words freeze on my tongue as I turn to see Felicia Erickson, a girl from my class, coming up the driveway wearing a pair of daisy dukes and a sequin tank top that shows off her large chest paired with a killer pair of black heels detailed with rhinestones.
I’m starting to feel too much for Max and it hits me like a medicine ball to the gut. I’m not one of those girls. I’ve never been one of those girls, and those are the kind of girls that Max likes. The kind he’s always liked. I rest the grease rag that I’d picked up on the hood of his Jeep and retreat out of the garage.
“Hey,” Max replies but reaches out and grips my hand, his sole focus on me. “What was your lunch?” he asks.
I shake my head as the reality of this whole situation sets in. Max closes his eyes, letting out a deep breath, and drops my hand. My skin prickles as the air hits where his hand had touched me, and I back up a couple of steps, nearly bumping into Felicia before clearing the garage.
I watch as she fills the space I’d been occupying seconds ago. Max stares at me, not blinking for a long moment, and I question if he’s going to say something else to me. Then I see his face dip as he kisses her.
I turn to leave, and it takes nearly everything in me to not break into a sprint.
I don’t see Max for three days after that kiss. I’m not sure who’s working harder at avoiding who.
“I know you’re having a difficult time right now, and both Eric and Max are complete dickheads, and I completely suck for whining to you right now, but I’m having the worst day.”
I look over as Kendall throws herself across my bed. Her blond hair splays across my pillows as she looks to the ceiling.
“What’s going on?” I drop the stack of books I’ve been going through, sorting the ones I’ll be bringing with me to school. I make my way over to her, more than happy to distract myself from my spider web of thoughts.
“Jameson’s going home this weekend because his sister’s getting married.” I nod. “He’s bringing a date,” she adds quietly. “A female date. A female date that he dated most of high school.”
“What?”
“Yup, flying home to attend his sister’s wedding … with his ex,” she deadpans.
“How long has it been planned? Did he just tell you today?”
“She called and he acted like nothing was wrong! I swear to you, Ace, I’m done. I’m not going to play these games with him. I’m so pissed right now!” She hits both sides of my bed with her fists.
I don’t know what kind of reassuring words to offer her, so I grip her hand and squeeze it as I sit beside her. “Mom and Dad are going to be gone for two weeks. Let’s have a party!”
Really, having a party is one of the very last things I want to do. I still haven’t fully recovered from the last one we threw that ended with people throwing up in the swimming pool and giving Zeus beer. The icing on the cake occurred when I interrupted a couple having sex on my parents’ bed, which to this day is easily classified as one of the top five most awkward moments of my life. We took the comforter to be dry cleaned along with all of the throw pillows, but I still can’t wipe that image from my mind. And it took me a few weeks before I could brave the pool again, but for Kendall, I’m willing to go through it again, with some revisions to the execution, like locking all of the bedroom doors and putting the cover on the pool.
“I’m going to go and call Shelby.” She pops up, pulling her phone out and hitting send before leaving my room.
I turn back to my books, wondering what’s going on with Jameson.
Kendall breezes back in my room smiling. “We’re going to Vegas!”
“We, Kemosabe?”
“Yes, you! You have my old license! This way you can get some space from Max and Eric, and I can go have fun while Jameson screws his ex.”
“I’m not going to Vegas, and n
either should you. You need to talk to the moron. I’m sure if you explain it to him in reverse roles he’ll understand.”
“I’m done talking.” She turns on her heel and leaves my room without another word.
I slide to the ground with a sigh and reach for my phone. Finding Jameson’s number, I send him a text,
Me: Don’t be an idiot and screw things up now, stupid.
Jameson: Wuts tht suppsd 2 mean?!
Me: Get a clue!!! You can’t date Kendall and go to a wedding with your ex. In what reality does that sound okay?
Jameson: Shes the 1 tht dsnt wnt 2 date exclusively.
Me: What in the hell is wrong with the two of you?!?!?!
Jameson doesn’t reply.
I pull my heel behind me, stretching my quads as I glance to Max’s driveway expectantly. I’m already fully stretched and just stalling. Last night I’d blown off a text he’d sent suggesting we hang out. He followed it up with another saying he’d meet me at six to go running and talk. We haven’t run together in over a week, but the talking is far more disconcerting than the actual running.
It’s nearing twenty after and he still isn’t outside. Anger and embarrassment trickle through me at the reality that he stood me up. I should go knock on his door and wake him up, but I really don’t want to face him. Perhaps it’s just better to leave things the way they are and continue ignoring one another.
When I arrive home from my run, I shower and dress quickly and then begin wandering through the house searching for something to organize or clean—something to fix. Unfortunately for me, my mother is the biggest clean freak in existence; even our spice cupboard is alphabetized and organized based on sweet and savory spices for cooking. My parents are still on vacation celebrating their anniversary, and Kendall left for Vegas yesterday so the house is empty. I contemplate calling one of my sisters, but I really don’t want to discuss my relationship status, and that seems to be the only thing they want to discuss lately.
