"I'm... sensitive right now," I said. “Be gentle, please.”
"You're such a tease, Nina, it's your fault."
Our gazes locked again. There was a determined glint in Allecra's turquoise eyes. The strength of her grip was suddenly apparent. I could feel the unmistakable tension wrecking within her lower region. I looked down and to my surprise, her secret member sprang out. Allecra got a hold of herself and rubbed her erection against my heated core unapologetically. It made me jump in shock.
"Allecra, wait!" I cried out. "You don't have a condom on yet."
"Nina please, I want you now," Allecra said between her heavy breaths. The affection in her blazing eyes mingled with a new kind of lust. She brushed and caressed my exposed lips with the tip of her rigidness. The sensual feeling it brought caused blissful havoc to wag in my startled body. It was pure maddening.
"No, please don't do that...Allecra..." I said in protest, trying to wriggle away from her grip. The constant stimulation of our sensitive parts against each other was consuming my mind, and the more I moved, the farther my legs inevitably parted in the process as Allecra wouldn't let me go.
My sensitivity could not escape the pleasurable contact of that eager slippery tip. A wave of stirring desire washed over me, stripping me off my willpower. I didn't know what to do. Allecra was like a different person. Her angelic face shone with hunger. Under a normal circumstance, I would have willingly welcomed her passion, but this wasn't what I had in mind.
Her hot lips burned trials of kisses over my skin. Allecra slipped herself inside me. Her member went through my startled depth in a single stroke effortlessly. My jaw dropped at the electrifying sensation. It shocked me to my core. Allecra moaned at the same time. She held me still as I convulsed around her, trying to adjust to the intoxicating feeling.
My heart drummed inside my chest. I felt her in my belly, filling the hollowness of my heated walls. The sensation of our joined bodies was extraordinary. It felt like nothing we had ever done before, but after the pleasuring shock wore off, a flare of anger rushed through my veins. This wasn't what I wanted. Allecra couldn't force me into this. When she tried to kiss me again, I recoiled away from her.
"I said no!" I cried. Not until I said it that my tears started rolling off my cheeks. Allecra froze as she stared at me with wide eyes.
"Nina..."
"Take it out now before you start raping me," I said in a quivering voice.
Allecra's mouth fell open. Shock and guilt shone through her bright turquoise eyes. Quickly but gently, Allecra eased out of me again. I hugged my naked self and turned away from her like a wounded animal.
"Wait! Nina, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to." She tried to pull me back into her arms again, but I shrugged her off and ran back towards the shore.
I gathered my clothes and went inside the tent. After I got dressed, I climbed onto the bed and covered myself with the blanket. My heart was still pounding in my ears. I heard Allecra's footsteps coming towards the tent. Her shadow cast over the canvas before she entered. I felt a weight on the mattress. Then Allecra's hand placed on my shoulder gently.
"I'm sorry I was impatient with you," she said in a pleading tone. "I got carried away."
"You knew I didn't want any of that," I said. "Why did you do it?"
"I just wanted to bring us closer together," Allecra said. "I want us to be one with no barrier between us."
I sat up and glared at her.
"Didn't you think of the consequence at all?"
"Nina, I love you. You don't have to be afraid of anything. I'll take great care of you, I promise."
"You don't get it, do you?" I said with a disappointing shake of my head. "It's not just about my fear of you getting me pregnant. It's about us respecting each other!"
Allecra looked quite surprised to see my emotional outburst.
"Maybe it doesn't cause anything anyway," she said. "You shouldn't be so worried."
"I'm not like other girls, Allecra. I can't do this for you. I'm scared! Why don't you understand? Why can't you try to understand my feelings?"
I covered my face in my hands and burst into tears. Allecra came to hold me, but I pulled away from her grasp.
"Please, leave me," I said in a tear-coated voice. "I want to be alone."
Then I dropped myself back onto the pillow with my back turned to her again. It was pointless to say anything more. Allecra let out a heavy sigh.
"Alright," she said and leaned over to kiss my hair softly.
I closed my eyes and burrowed my head into the blanket, trying not to think what had just happened. I didn't know what to make out of this circumstance. I was too upset to cry and just lying there, staring and unseeing.
The sun must have already set. The tent was growing dark, but I didn't turn on the lamp. The sounds of crickets and wild birds orchestrated from the trees.
I woke up again with a start. I didn't realize I had fallen asleep. A bright light came through the tent from the outside. I realized Allecra had built the campfire. And the first feeling that wagged in my gut was an intent hunger. I hadn't eaten since we were in Allecra's house and hiking had exhausted me.
My nose instinctively caught on a delicious aroma. It made my stomach growl. Outside were the crackling sounds of burning wood. Allecra must have built the campfire for cooking. That was where the delicious smell came from. I wished I could have something to eat, but I didn't want to face the blonde alien again. Why did things go downward spiral? We were having fun and enjoying each other's company, and all of a sudden, we were not in speaking term. The whole situation made me even more miserable. I rolled back on the bed and curled up into a fetus position, hoping my stomach would quiet down.
A moment later, the canvas flap pulled open and Allecra came inside.
"Nina, are you awake?"
I stayed silent. She came to sit beside me. The strong delicious smell brushed past my nose again. It awoke all my senses, causing my eyes to open. I realized she had barbecued some skewer meats.
"You must be hungry," she said. "Get up and eat something."
"I'm not hungry," I said, but the moment I said it, my stomach growled treacherously. Damn it!
Allecra chuckled. "Come on, stop being a sulking baby. I made a lot of kebabs for you."
"I don't like kebabs," I murmured again.
"Really?" she said. "Have you ever tried it? It's so delicious."
Allecra picked up one of the stick meats and started eating it.
"Hmm...juicy and fresh," she moaned. "Are you sure you're not hungry?"
My mouth watered until it almost choked me to death as I was lying down. Why the heck does it have to smell so good?
I sat up with an annoyed frown. Allecra looked from her plate, still chewing the barbecued meat wholeheartedly. Her lips glistened with grease, and there was a suppressed mirth in her eyes. Then she handed me the plate.
"Want some?" she asked.
"No." I gazed at the food longingly. The beef was cut nicely in even cubes and stack with green peppers, onions, and mushrooms. The meat dripped with a honey teriyaki sauce. I licked my lips before I could stop myself.
"Alright, if you say so," Allecra said and then began to get up again.
"No, wait!" I cried and pulled her by the hand. She sat down again.
"Pardon?"
"I want to try it," I said tersely.
"Okay." Allecra put the plate down. "Tell me which one you like."
"The biggest one, please," I told her. "but take the mushrooms out."
She smiled and did as was told, picking out the mushrooms for me then handed me the skewers.
At first, I nibbled it, trying to act indifferent, but once I discovered how delicious it tasted, I started gobbling everything greedily. Allecra went outside and brought me a few more. She watched me eat until I was satisfied. Then she poured me some tea from a thermos bottle into a cup. I must have looked barbaric, but I was too starving to care.
"You're done?"
she asked. I nodded back, feeling a little embarrassed afterward. She took the plate out and came back a while later.
I sat, sipping the warm tea in my hands. I was trying to convey the message that, just because she fed me doesn't mean we have made up. But then Allecra moved over towards me.
"What are you doing?" I asked, leaning away.
"You look like a cat with whiskers, let me clean your face," she said, holding a wet towel. Gently she wiped the sticky sauce off my face. After she was done, she stared at me. Her eyes sparkled under the dimming light.
"I'm sorry," she said.
I dropped my gaze from hers. Allecra took my hand and kissed it.
"You could have asked me first," I murmured.
"I know," she said. "I wanted you so bad, I got greedy and forgot myself. Let's not fight. It feels horrible when we fight."
"I wasn't the one who started it," I said. Allecra rubbed her eyes with her thumb and index finger and sighed.
"Nina, I don't have the energy to do this anymore," she sighed.
"I know I'm difficult to love. You shouldn't waste your energy with me," I said bitterly and looked away.
Allecra gently tipped my chin and made me look at her again.
"Nina, if you loved yourself just as much as I love you, you would love yourself endlessly."
I let my heart soak in the tingling warmth of her words. It filled me with pleasant joy and washed away the chagrins between us. I put the cup down and went out to embrace Allecra in my arms. She held me back tightly.
"Maybe we can work it out another way," I suggested. "I can take pills if you want."
"We can talk about it later," she said. "Now just come and cuddle with me. I want to hold you until the sun rises. I don't want to see you cry because of me, Nina."
I nodded and then we got into the blanket together. Allecra pulled me to her as I curled myself up into her body.
At last, we came back to each other's arms again.
CHAPTER 41
I opened my eyes and realized it was already morning. Inside the tent was brightened by the sunlight. But something felt different, and I found the bed deprived of Allecra’s form.
I got up and changed into a clean shirt I had packed with me. Then I went outside, expecting to find Allecra doing whatever she was doing. But all I saw was the faint smoke drifting from the campfire of last night.
The sunshine glared down the pristine turquoise lake. The tranquil view was pleasant to the eye. But I was more concerned about finding Allecra than to enjoy the landscape.
I searched around the campsite, looking for her, but she seemed to disappear out of sight.
"Allecra? Where are you?" I called out to her as I walked down towards the pebbled shore. Where had she gone? I tried calling her, only to be answered by the cries of birds on their way to their early hunts.
Unlike yesterday the forest seemed dark and deep with the towering trees. They formed thick walls around me. It was also eerily quiet without Allecra.
I decided to go down to the lake again and gathered the water to wash myself. Through my own reflection, a strayed unwanted thought came into my mind. What if she was hurt because of my rejection? I shouldn't have been so harsh on her. After all, Allecra was born with this instinct, something that was akin to thirst. And she'd been patient and understanding this whole time while all I cared about was what I wanted. Now that I thought it over, I felt a smidgen of guilt with how I reacted towards her.
I came back to the tent and sat down on a log, waiting for Allecra to return. The intense loneliness began to seep in and overwhelm me. I knew it was silly to be scared. She wouldn't have left without me, not like that. But her sudden disappearance made me anxious and slightly deranged. All kinds of dark thoughts battled their way into my head.
I tried not to panic as I sat there alone. Then I heard the stomping of boots of someone's footsteps from a grove of pines. My heart skipped. I turned around. To my immense relief, it was Allecra. She was holding an armload of dry twigs and branches.
"Allecra!" I cried and ran to her.
The moment she saw my distraught face, she dropped everything to the ground and came to meet me half way. I threw my arms around her, and she held me back tightly.
"Nina, what's wrong? Are you okay?" She asked.
I pulled away to look at her.
"I woke up, and I didn't see you," I said. "Where have you been?"
"I'm sorry. I thought you were still sleeping," she said with an apologetic look. "I just went out to pick some apples and berries then gathered some wood for cooking."
"What are you? A hunter-gatherer from Stone Age?" I said in frustration. "Don't you leave me alone like that!"
"I'm so sorry. I didn't know," she said and kissed my forehead to soothe me. "I just wanted you to rest and make you breakfast before you wake up."
Seeing her guilt-ridden face, I decided to let it slide.
"Never mind," I said in a small voice. "I just got scared without you."
"Now let's sit down," she said and moved us back to the tent. We both sat on the log before the campfire. "By the way, I brought back some of these for you."
She opened her leather bag hanging from her shoulder and pulled out a bunch of wildflowers. I had never seen flowers like these. They looked similar to lavenders, but bigger with bell-like petals and came in blue and purple hue. They were truly beautiful.
"It’s lupins," Allecra told me. "There's a field of them nearby. You want to go and see it with me?"
I looked at the flowers then back at her. So she'd been busy picking flowers for me.
"They're so lovely, thank you," I said and took them from her. "And yes, I'd love to."
"Good, but first help me with the breakfast." She smiled and kissed my temple again.
Allecra rekindled the embers until the flame burst to life again and then set out to work. Everything she needed was packed in Tupperware. She seemed to know what we would do out here in the wild. It was like she had planned it beforehand.
I helped her whisking the egg with milk and cinnamon in a bowl. Allecra stirred mascarpone in another pot then spread it over bread slices. I liked watching her cook. It was so adorable.
She placed the maple syrup and berries in a small covered saucepan and swirled it over the fire. I dipped sandwiches in egg mixture then cooked them until crisp and brown.
When it was all done, Allecra poured over the toasties with warm syrup. It looked like the kind of thing you ordered from a luxurious restaurant. It tasted even better with the view of the sunrise over the turquoise lake.
"Hmm...if there's anything finer than this, I have not encountered it yet," I moaned after a big bite of the toast, feeling the cheese melted in my mouth.
"Am I not the finest thing you have encountered so far?" Allecra said.
"Well, you're a tad better than this toast."
Allecra laughed and reached her hand out to wipe the syrup off the corner of my lips with her thumb.
"Sorry for leaving you alone earlier," she said again.
"It's fine," I said. "I think I was just a bundle of nerves. I shouldn't have been so harsh on you."
"Nina," she said with her eyes looking at me. "Both of us have a lot of feelings we need to sort out once in a while."
"I promise I won't be like that with you again," I said.
Allecra smiled at me and pulled me to her.
We finished our breakfast, cleaned up the place and put out the fire.
Then we set out for a short hike to the lupin field.
Allecra and I traversed the through the green forest. Sunlight shot down through the branches of the trees like spotlights. The slope gave out after a while, and we entered a level plateau. The trail reached a gentle waving thicket of plume grass. Allecra would reach for my hand whenever she thought I was having weak footing.
At last, we arrived at the blooming field. The view of the flowers carpeted the earth took my breath away. It was like standing before a fairyland. Th
e lupins blossomed in various shades of blue, yellow, purple, and pink. The turquoise lake stretched out to the horizon. The mountain's snow-white peaks looked incandescent against the blue sky.
"This place is so beautiful," I whispered in awe.
We walked down the field together and found a nice spot among the swaying flowers. We sat down and let the faint warmth of sunlight washed over us. Allecra lay down on the soft grass.
"Come over here, Nina," she said and I moved towards her. The lupins surrounding us danced against the breeze. Allecra was soft and warm against me. We snuggled into each other. Then we kissed. Our lips moved with growing ardor.
"Tell me something Allecra," I whispered.
"Yes?"
"Do you really want to have kids with me?"
Her eyes lit up at my question. She turned to me in surprise as if she couldn't believe what she just heard. After a moment, she nodded.
"Of course, I do,” she told me. There were vehemence and sincerity in her voice that made my heart clench.
"I don't know if I can do this yet," I said. "I couldn't help but have a dreadful feeling about the sharing and nurturing a new life. But my heart is not made of stone or steel to remain unmoved by your entreaties."
Despite her extraterrestrial intelligence, Allecra's eyes still fixed on me in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"I want to be emotionally and physically ready, that I'm capable of being a mother of your child."
I watched Allecra's mouth fell open.
"Oh Nina, that would the most wonderful thing in the world to me!"
I smiled nervously at her hopeful enthusiasm.
"Allecra," I said again. "There are too many things I have to deal with right now. I still haven't found my place in the world yet. What if you have to wait ten years or twenty years for me?"
"Whenever you’re ready." She leaned in to kiss my forehead.
"But I might never recover from this chronic fear," I said. "Will you wait for me forever?"
This time, she didn't answer me right away, and my heart pounded at the notion that she was disappointed about it.
"You overthink things too much," she said at last. "Stop letting yourself be scared by what hasn't happened yet. Throw away the worse-case scenarios and doubts. I will protect you and comfort you if things get tough."
Black Knight Page 45
