by Jaci Burton
"You didn't say you thought we'd lose."
She cocked her head to the side. "What?"
"You didn't say when we went down two goals you thought we might lose."
She searched his face, surprised he'd even think that. "I never thought you were going to lose, Will. I knew you had it in you to win that game, no matter the score."
"I love you, Amber."
Her breath caught. "What?"
"I love you. Do you want to know why?"
Her heart was beating so fast she could feel her blood pumping. "Yes, please."
"You're the sweetest woman I've ever met. You always think of other people. You're thoughtful, insightful and smart. And smart women are sexy as fuck. You're also the sexiest woman I've ever known."
That comment surprised her and her brows went up. "I am?"
"Hell, yes. You throw yourself into your sexuality wholeheartedly and without restraint. Do you have any idea how hot that is?"
"No."
"It is. No matter how many times I've been with you, Amber, you always leave me wanting more of you. And last, but not least, you believe in me, and that touches my heart in ways I never expected. I told you I believe in love." He raised his hand to show her the tattoo. "I've seen it firsthand. I know what love is. And I feel it when I'm with you."
She felt like she was going to hyperventilate she was breathing so fast. "I didn't expect this. I don't know what to say."
He smoothed his hand down her arm. "You don't have to say anything."
"Yes, I do. Because I've had all these feelings--all these emotions having to do with you--that I didn't know what to do with. But I don't know if what I'm feeling is love, Will, because I've never been in love. I do know I have very strong feelings for you. How could I not? You're honorable and kind and funny and smart and athletic and sexy and hot and everything I could ever want in a man."
He smiled at her. "But I'm also the first--and only--guy you've ever been with."
She shrugged. "That doesn't scare me. I know my own mind. I know what I want and what I need out of life. It's not like I need to go out and have sex with five more guys before I decide you're the one I want to be with. I'm not that kind of person."
"I'm actually glad you didn't blurt out 'I love you, too.'"
"You are?"
"Yes. Because if you say it back it has to be because you feel it. Because you mean it."
Relief washed over her. "Thank you. That means so much to me."
He slid her off his lap and took her hand. "I didn't intend to tell you that when I came over today. You have enough pressure going on with your performance."
She half turned and draped her leg over his. "You do realize that you telling me how you feel about me doesn't put any pressure on me, right?"
"I'm glad to hear that. Because I don't want anything to change between us. We can continue to hang out and have fun. I just believe in being honest. Honesty is important to me."
She nodded. "To me, too."
"Good. So let's just hang out together until it's time for you to go."
They ended up watching some of the day's events on television. She laughed when he told her they'd done tequila shots last night at the bar they'd ended up at, and that one of their players had thrown up in the trash can outside the bar.
"Oh, hopefully no media was around," she said.
"No, they weren't, but we all got it on our phones and we showed it to him this morning. He was so hungover it made him sick all over again."
She let out a sympathetic laugh. "Oh, that was mean."
"Yeah, it was. After interviews he said he was going back to his apartment and back to bed."
"He must feel miserable."
"He's twenty-one. He needs to learn his liquor limits."
She laid her head on his shoulder. "It was a big night. You can't really blame him for wanting to celebrate with all of you."
"I guess not."
When it was time to go, she stood and walked Will to the door. She lifted up on her toes to kiss him. "Thank you for being here with me today. And for your declaration. I don't even have words for how much it means to me."
He cupped her neck and brought her closer, then kissed her in a way that made her toes curl right into the wool of her socks. If she didn't have to be at the arena, she'd keep him right there with her to explore that kiss, to get him naked and spend the entire rest of the day playing with him.
But not tonight. Rarely would there be anything of a higher priority than her spending time with Will. Except now, when she had to skate for her life.
It was Will who finally broke the kiss. "Now my dick's hard and I'm going to have to calculate stats in my head on the way to the elevator."
"Stats, huh?"
"Yeah. My official stats. Boring as fuck. Guaranteed to deflate my erection."
She grinned. "Sorry about that."
"It's okay. You can make it up to me later."
"Consider it done."
He grabbed his coat. "Go kill 'em out there on the ice, babe."
"I intend to."
He walked out and she shut the door, then turned and went into the bedroom to get herself ready for tonight's performance.
TWENTY-NINE
HAVING A GUY TELL YOU THAT HE LOVES YOU WAS A strong motivating factor when preparing for your last performance in the games.
Amber had always connected to her music, to her movements, but this time she felt an emotional link that had never been there before.
First, though, she had to wait. Since she was in second place after the short program, she'd skate second to last.
She had warmed up and now she was in her tracksuit, staying limber, doing squats and wall stretches and hanging out with Tia, who seemed nervous as hell. So she decided to distract her.
"What's the first thing you're going to do when you get back home?" she asked.
Tia dragged her gaze away from the French skater. "What?"
"The first thing you're going to do when you get home?"
"Oh." Tia thought about it for a few seconds, then answered with a wide smile. "I'm having a large sausage and pepperoni pizza with extra cheese."
"Oh, God, Tia. That sounds so good."
"Doesn't it? Then I'll go back to training, but I have to have a pizza or I might die. Oh, and loaded nachos. And a huge cheeseburger with grilled onions."
Amber's lips curved. "Clearly you've been thinking a lot about food."
"My mother's a nutritionist. So she makes sure I eat well, but she knows I have a thing for pizza. And nachos."
"And cheeseburgers?"
"Yes. With bacon cheese fries."
"You are killing me here."
Tia laughed. "It's good to skate hungry. It makes you perform better."
"Who told you that?"
"My trainer."
"Ha. She lied."
"I know. But it got me through a few more salads with grilled chicken."
Amber wrinkled her nose. "I don't want to see another salad with grilled chicken for a while. I think I'll take at least a week off from the healthy diet as well."
Tia bent forward at the waist and grabbed her ankles to stretch her hamstrings, then turned her head to look at Amber. "What's your indulgence?"
"Chocolate marshmallow milkshakes."
"Oh, that does sound good."
"And pie."
Tia stood and stretched her back. "What kind of pie?"
"I don't even care. Any kind. Apple, cherry or peach. With ice cream on top."
"Mmm."
"Oh, and a huge steak, with a loaded baked potato. And, of course, a cheeseburger. Who can resist a cheeseburger?"
Tia's eyes widened. "Yum. We should go out to eat tonight after the performance. Something really disgusting."
"We do have the gala Saturday. So we'll still have to fit into our skating outfits."
"I didn't say eat twenty pounds of food. We'll eat tonight, then run in the morning."
"You've got a
deal."
When it was time for Tia to skate, Amber hugged her. "Leave it all out there, and most importantly, have fun with it."
Tia nodded and smiled. "I will."
Tia skated a clean program, which Amber had hoped for her. She looked beautiful out there, too, and the crowd was behind her. And while she lacked the power and technicality that some other skaters had, her performance had been lovely and without flaws. Amber applauded loudly for her when she came off the ice.
Tia sat with her coach and trainer and waited for her scores.
When they came up, Amber cheered. They were higher than her short program scores.
She came off the ice and hugged Amber.
"You did so well," Amber said. "I'm incredibly proud of you."
"Thank you. I'm proud of myself."
They watched as Hua Ping and Olena Brutka skated. There was something off about Ping's performance, and it was glaringly obvious. Amber thought she might be nursing an injury, because her jumps weren't as high, and she stumbled on one. That just wasn't like her, since Ping was always technically proficient. Plus, she had no luster.
It showed in her scores, too. She dropped quite a bit, down to sixth, which helped Tia's positioning.
Brutka skated well and ended up getting decent scores. But Amber knew she could do better.
Amber changed into her skating outfit. She stared into the full-length mirror, making sure her hair was perfectly done. She wore the front part of her hair braided, the back falling straight. All the beading on her outfit had been set to perfection. Her outfit was lavender and blue, the beading made to look like a starry sky.
She was skating tonight to rock music, and she intended to rock the entire arena.
She inhaled a deep breath, let it out, then repeated the action.
She had waited a lifetime for this moment. This was her last chance.
And now it was time to find out if the past four years of preparation, if her new program, was worth all that effort she'd put into it.
Yegor braced his hands on her shoulders.
"You have prepared four years for this," he said. "No one is more talented than you, more confident than you. I believe in you. Now go and show the world your magic."
She nodded and made her way onto the ice, taking in the cheers of the crowd. She set her toe pick into the ice, waited for the queue of the music. When it started up, so did she.
Normally she didn't think at all during a performance. She just went through the motions, prepared for one jump, went into the other, making sure she had it all in line.
Tonight was different.
She was loved, and she was going to let that love flow through her, to show the audience what it felt like.
She'd always held herself in check. Tonight she let her emotions free, showing the beauty, the angst, the uncertainty of love.
She felt it from her skates all the way to the tips of her fingertips--the power of it as she flew into a triple axel and followed it up with a triple flip. She sailed out of that and swirled over the ice, letting her heart take over, showing the audience and the judges the freedom of love as she spun out of control.
Only she had the control, and when she came out, she went on, hoping she showed the audience how beautiful love was, how it could change someone. How Will had changed her, how he'd opened her up.
She'd never felt this free, had never skated so openly before. Each jump felt so easy, each connection an extension of her skates.
When she finished, she glided onto one knee on the ice, raised her hands and her face toward the rafters, and expressed the joy on her face.
She knew love. She was loved. She was happy.
The music stopped and the crowd noise was incredible. She rose to her feet and smiled, waved and knew she had given it her very best.
Win or lose, she was satisfied. She waved to the crowd and skated off.
Yegor and Valeria were there to hug her and accompany her to the waiting area.
"That was the best I have ever seen you skate," Yegor said.
She smiled. "Thank you. I felt really good about it."
Valeria kissed both of her cheeks. "You were magnificent."
She squeezed Valeria's hand. "Thank you."
They sat and the waiting began. Her heart pounded and her pulse raced. She had all the control when she skated. But the judges had all the control now.
"You will receive very high scores," Yegor whispered in her ear.
She hoped she wasn't setting herself up for disappointment. But she knew she'd done the best she could, the best she'd ever skated. It had to be enough.
When the scores came up, her eyes widened, her entire body and mind in shock.
She'd never scored that high before. The marks for both technical and program elements were higher than she'd ever received. Her hands flew to her cheeks and she looked over at Yegor, who nodded at her.
"I told you. High marks."
"I cannot believe this. Did it just happen?"
Valeria rubbed her back. "Believe it. Believe in yourself. You were wonderful."
"And now you are in first place."
She could hardly breathe. Now only one thing stood between her and the gold medal she'd worked all these years for.
Sasha Petrova.
And she had no control over that, either.
Amber knew that for Sasha to beat her, she'd have to skate a flawless program. She'd let Yegor figure out the math on what it would take, because Amber wanted to take these last few minutes and float on that cloud of bliss. Her entire program had been an out-of-body experience.
She had Will to thank for that.
Okay, that wasn't entirely true. Will had given her additional motivation, but she'd skated the program of her life. She had to give herself the credit. It had been her on those skates, feeling those feelings and translating them into what she felt was a beautiful performance.
She was proud of herself.
But now it was time to watch Sasha.
Amber tried to watch Sasha skate from a dispassionate angle. There was no doubt she was technically proficient, and her jumps were very good. But Amber just couldn't be objective where Sasha was concerned. She mentally picked out every perceived flaw--probably even where there weren't any--hoping to ascertain where the judges might take off some points.
She wanted to walk away, not watch, but Sasha's performances were always mesmerizing. She drew you in with her magical movements, then made you gasp with the height and perfection of her jumps.
Amber felt the gold slipping away with every minute of Sasha's performance. There was no way she could match that level of precision.
But she thought back to her own performance. She'd skated better than she ever had. She'd been flawless, too, and she knew her program had a level of magic that had captured the audience.
She closed her eyes and clasped her hands together.
Believe in yourself, Amber.
She was just as good as Sasha Petrova. No, tonight she had been better. She had to believe that.
As was typical, Sasha received loud applause and cheers from the audience. She had skated a great program. Was it flawless? Amber didn't know since it wasn't possible for her to be objective. Not tonight, anyway.
All she could do was wait until Sasha's scores came up.
No matter what, Amber would receive a medal. Considering the talented figure skaters here, that was amazing. She was thrilled.
Yegor came up behind her and laid his hands on her shoulders, both of them watching and waiting for Sasha's scores to come up. It seemingly took forever. Amber knew Sasha was nervous as well.
When the scores went up, Amber just stared.
Oh, God.
She felt the squeeze of Yegor's fingers on her shoulders, but she was numb. She heard the roar of the crowd, but it seemed as if they were far, far away, that she wasn't even in the ice arena any longer.
She'd just won a gold medal.
Her lifelong dream ha
d finally come true.
Yegor turned her around and picked her up in his arms. She was already crying. Valeria was crying. Yegor hugged her, and when he put her down, there were tears in his eyes.
"You were magnificent tonight," Yegor said. "You fought for it and earned the gold medal."
Valeria hugged her next. "I'm so proud of you, moya myla divchyna."
Valeria had often called her "my sweet girl" in Ukrainian when she was little, but now it made the tears prick her eyes again. She squeezed Valeria around the waist. "Thank you. Thank you both. I couldn't have done this without you."
"Go out and wave to the people. They want to see you."
She nodded, swiped at the tears, then walked out to wave at the crowd, who burst into applause and cheers.
It was an incredible moment and she soaked it in, because it was one she'd never forget.
After, she did several quick media interviews, then went over to congratulate Sasha, who had won the silver medal, and Olena, who'd won the bronze.
"You were amazing," Sasha said, giving her a hug. "I have never seen you skate so well. You deserve the gold tonight."
"Thank you," she said. "You are very hard to beat."
Sasha smiled. "That is a very nice compliment."
Since Sasha was only twenty, Amber knew she'd be back in four years. Amber wouldn't.
This was the end-of-game competition for her. But she'd gotten what she wanted.
Tia came up to her and hugged her. "Oh, I'm so happy for you."
Even Tia was crying. "Thank you. And congratulations on fourth place. That's amazing."
Tia smiled. "Thank you. My coach said for my first time it's very good."
"It is very good. In four years when you come back, you'll be on the medal stand."
Tia squeezed her hand. "Thank you for that."
When she stood on the medal stand and that gold medal was draped around her neck, she fought back tears again. She'd waited a lifetime for this, and when the national anthem played, she put her hand over her heart and let the tears fall freely. She was so proud to represent her country, and she hoped she'd made the US proud.
She did several interviews with networks and journalists after the medal ceremony. It was nearly midnight by the time she finished. When she grabbed her phone, she saw several text messages from her mother and father. Her mother had also left her a voice mail. She had several text messages from Will.
She texted Will: You still up?
He replied right away with: Hell, yeah. Been waiting for you. Where are you?
She sent him a reply letting him know she was leaving the arena. He told her he was on his way to meet her. She smiled at that. Then she sent a text message to her mother letting her know she was just now getting out of the arena after interviews, that she was exhausted, and she'd call her first thing in the morning, so they could meet for breakfast.