by Amy Starling
“Hey, Jayce. I just talked to my mom and –”
“No time to talk, Elle. I'm in 430.” His voice was panicked, his breathing raspy. “I need help now!”
Chapter 21 - Elle
I slammed the elevator button for floor three. Nothing happened. Broken again.
I was too worried to be annoyed. Raced up the stairs instead.
Oh, God, what was wrong with Jayce? The call disconnected before he could tell me. Was he hurt? Needed an ambulance? Had somebody died?
Or maybe he was in trouble with the cops again. Damn it, I swore if he added yet another charge to that record of his...
I sprinted to 430. Inside, a couple of children screamed loudly. Heart pounding, I knocked.
Jayce whipped open the door and relief washed over his face.
“Thank God you're here. I couldn't take much more of this on my own.”
His hair was frazzled, his shirt stained with some red liquid. There was a strong smell of burnt popcorn and smoke drifting through the apartment. In the background, two little boys tore down the hall pretending to be dinosaurs.
“What the heck is going on?”
He sighed and pulled me in. The kids barely glanced at me before deciding to use the couch as a trampoline.
“Their parents went out for the evening. About a half hour ago, I got a noise complaint and came up to investigate. That's when I found this.”
“They were left unattended?”
“Not at first. They had a babysitter, some girl named Kelly, I think.”
The shorter of the boys stopped bouncing and nodded. “She's so stupid. She wouldn't play with us. And she wouldn't let us have any ice cream.”
I knelt down and tried to talk slowly and calmly. Obviously, Jayce's panic was only egging them on.
“Where did she go?”
He rolled his eyes. “Her dumb boyfriend showed up and they started yelling about money. She called him an asshole and a prick.”
Jayce blanched and cleared his throat as he backed slowly away.
The other boy tugged on my sleeve. “Lady, what's a prick?”
Jayce snickered. Glad he thought this was so funny! After that fight with mom just now, I seriously didn't have the mental energy to handle this.
“It's nothing you need to worry about. So where is Kelly?”
“The guy said he was gonna pawn her TV if she didn't pay up. He left. She ran after him and never came back.”
“She just left you kids here alone? When are your parents coming home?”
He shrugged. “Probably real late.”
“I tried to call them,” Jayce added. “Got their number from our tenant directory. But they're not answering.”
“Well, we can't just leave these children here by themselves.”
“You want me to babysit?” He laughed nervously. “That's what I called you up here for, Pink. I thought you'd be better at this stuff than me.”
“Oh, you're not leaving me to handle this alone.”
The shrill cry of a baby pierced the air. It came from somewhere down the hall and was so loud, it almost gave me a heart attack.
“Ugh. Our annoying little sister woke up.”
“There's a baby here with you?”
“Her name is Rose and she sucks.” The taller boy turned up the volume on the cartoon on TV. “She's always crying and stuff.”
I glanced at Jayce, who had sheer terror written all over his face. Suddenly, I got a very interesting idea.
What better way to find out how he handled babies? With our own on the way, that was definitely something I needed to know – and something he'd need a lot of practice for, too.
If he didn't abandon me to take care of the child on my own, of course.
“I'm hungry, Sam! Make me pizza rolls.”
“Shut up. Mom said I'm not allowed to use the oven, idiot.”
Jayce backed toward the door like a wounded animal desperate to escape. I grabbed his hand before he could flee.
“How about you fix the kids something to eat while I check on the baby?”
He nodded. “Uh... Okay, I guess. You know I'm not real good with this stuff.”
“You can handle making some pizza rolls. You're a fast learner.” I kissed his cheek, ignoring the giggling of the boys. “Besides, it doesn't hurt to get some experience under your belt. Never know when you might need it.”
He shot me a confused look. He really had no idea, did he? He'd noticed me throwing up randomly for weeks. Made comments about my odd food cravings. Yet it never occurred to him that I might be carrying his baby.
When I told him the truth, it was going to be like dropping a bomb on his head. I was not looking forward to it.
The smaller boy, Andy, jumped up and down with excitement as Jayce dug into their freezer.
“Pepperoni pizza rolls! Ooh, can I have a Hot Pocket too?”
Their parents had stacked food in that freezer so haphazardly that when he pulled out one package, ten more things tumbled down. A whole frozen chicken landed on his foot.
“Shit!” He winced. “Thank God for steel-toed boots.”
“Watch your language around them, okay?”
“Don't worry,” Sam said. “We hear that stuff all the time at school.”
“Yeah,” Andy added. “Dad says that word a lot when his team screws up, too.”
Figuring that Jayce couldn't possibly mess up making pizza pockets in the oven, I followed the crying down the hall into a nursery.
Little Rose lay on her back in the crib, wailing as she swatted at her mobile. She was pretty cute, even with the tears rolling down her chubby red cheeks.
“What's wrong, Rose?” I carefully picked her up. “You miss your mommy, huh? Don't worry. She'll be home for you soon.”
Despite having a newborn on the way, I had little idea how to care for one. I didn't know what her cries meant. Was she hungry? Tired? Lonely?
In the other room, the kids were shouting at each other. I cradled Rose in my arms and went out to help Jayce.
“Gimme the remote. I want to watch now.”
“Get out of here, jerk. I was here first.”
“Mom said you have to share!”
Jayce was fiddling with the knobs on the oven. “Piece of crap,” he muttered. “I set it to 400, but it's barely warm.”
The baby stopped crying, looked up at him, and cooed. He glanced at her, then me. The frustration on his face softened.
“I think she likes you. You're a hit with all the ladies, aren't you?”
He laughed and ran a hand through his messy hair. “Well, she's cute, at least.”
“Want to hold her?”
The panic returned to his eyes. “That's not a good idea. I mean, look how little she is. I'll break her.”
“She's not made of glass.”
The odor of pizza rolls baking did not agree with me one bit. I gagged and hurried to put Rose in Jayce's arms.
“Take her, please. I have to...”
I ran to the bathroom, let it all out, then cleaned myself up. When I came back, Rose was already starting to cry again.
“Take it easy, kiddo. It's all right.” He rocked her gently. “Oh man, where's your mom? I totally suck at this.”
There was something undeniably sexy about the scene: a big, strong fireman, brave enough to walk into burning buildings, holding a helpless baby in his powerful arms.
I knew then he could do this. He had it in him to be a good father if he wanted to. But taking care of a baby was hard, grueling work. Would he be willing to take on that challenge with me?
Having great sex was awesome, but not enough to sustain a relationship and especially not a marriage. And now, with a child being thrown in the mix... Could he handle it? Could I?
“I'm watching Cartoon Network and you can't do anything to stop me!” Andy wrenched the remote from his brother's hand.
“Give that back, stupid!”
He grabbed it and tried to pull it away. The remo
te slipped, went flying into the wall, and out fell the batteries. The loud noise startled Rose and made her cry.
“Hey, kids.” Jayce glared at them. “You scared the baby. Knock it off.”
His gruffness worked wonders at making them fall in line. Sam quietly retrieved the remote while Andy sat down and said not a word.
Jayce shushed Rose and bounced her up and down. When he finally saw me there watching him, he sighed.
“Thank goodness. I think the baby's easier to take care of than those boys. At least she doesn't know how to talk back yet.”
Rose gurgled and whimpered. I looked in the fridge for something she could eat. There was a ready-made bottle of formula waiting on the shelf, along with instructions for heating.
“You're doing well. I'm surprised – but then again, I always knew you'd be able to handle some kids. After all, you act like one yourself.”
He laughed. “Very funny. Here, you take the bundle of joy while I get the brat's food.”
We worked together like this for the next couple of hours. Instead of letting the boys be glued to the TV, Jayce taught them how to play poker. When Rose seemed sleepy, I read her a story in the rocking chair and put her to bed.
Finally, we had everything under control. It filled me with a kind of satisfaction I had never yet felt before. I really did enjoy taking care of kids with Jayce. What would our own children be like, though?
I wanted to find out. I wanted a family with him so badly.
At long last, their parents came home. I didn't speak to either Beth or her husband Marcus often, so they were probably very surprised to see us sitting in their apartment uninvited.
“Elle, Jayce? What are you doing here? Where's the babysitter?” Beth ran to the nursery. “Is my baby okay?”
“She's asleep. Seems your babysitter took off a few hours early.”
“Guess what, dad?” Sam ran up to his father with his playing cards. “I beat Jayce three times in a row. He taught me how to bluff, and I'm real good at it.”
Marcus sighed and ruffled his son's hair. “Wonderful. Hey, thanks, you two. You did us a serious favor tonight. We couldn't get a phone signal where we were, so I dunno what we would have done without you.”
Jayce grinned. “Apartment manager. Firefighter. Nanny. I do it all, I guess.”
He pulled out his wallet and handed us each a hundred-dollar bill. “For your trouble.”
“Oh, no, we can't accept this.”
“Go on. I was gonna give it to the babysitter, but it's yours now.”
Beth returned, smiling this time. “Rose is sound asleep. Whatever you did, it worked wonders.”
We said goodbye to everyone, then headed out.
“Well, that was quite an experience. I'm going home and having myself a cold beer. You want one?”
I shook my head. “No, but I wouldn't mind coming over. We really should talk.”
Back at Jayce's place, we sat on the couch and tried to relax. I rested my head on his shoulder while he drank his beer – sipping, not chugging the entire can, for once.
“I talked to my mom. She admitted everything.”
He grunted. “Of course.”
“She told me your dad's always had a thing for her, even when Debbie was alive. That's why he asked her to marry him so quickly after she passed.”
He gulped the rest of his beer. “Son of a bitch. He treated her so poorly. Maybe he deserves for your mom to screw him over.”
“I begged her to reconsider, to tell David the truth. She refused. She's going to act like nothing happened.”
“Then you know what we have to do.”
We walked out to the balcony to get some fresh air. As I peered over the railing to the street below, I caught a glimpse of my belly. It was definitely turning into a little bump. Jayce probably thought I'd just put on a few pounds.
I couldn't hide this for much longer. Keeping this a secret was eating me up inside.
“So, I heard occupancy hit over 80 percent today thanks to the hot dog extravaganza.”
“Yeah, it did.”
He smiled and squeezed me hard. “Then we did it, right?”
I looked at the sparkly ring on my left hand. “Almost.”
He had the marriage license already. I'd seen it hanging on his wall, but he hadn't done anything with it or even mentioned it to me. If he was having second thoughts, telling him the truth would scare him off for good.
“We're getting married, okay, Pink?”
“When?”
“Soon. I just... I'm trying to make it perfect for you.”
I sighed. “Thought we were doing it at the courthouse.”
“No. That's not good enough. You wanted a ring; you got one. You want a fairy-tale wedding? You're going to have that too. I just haven't figured it out yet.”
Tears came easily to my eyes, as they did these days. Jayce was going through so much while trying to give me the wedding I had always dreamed of. I had to tell him about the child before it was too late.
Had to let him make this choice on his own.
“I... I have to tell you something, Jayce. It's big. Really big.”
He looked at me like I had two heads. God, I'd never felt so nervous in my life.
“Is it bad?”
“Depends how you look at it.” I stroked my bump of a belly. “You want to take a guess what it is?”
His gaze fell to my stomach. Then his eyes widened.
“No. You're not... Don't tell me you're...”
I nodded. “Pregnant, yes. It's yours.”
He clutched his own stomach, as if he might throw up. This was a man who risked his life by walking through fire – yet somehow, the thought of having a baby scared him even more than that.
“How the hell? You were on the pill.” He grabbed my hand. “You were taking it, right?”
“Of course! I wouldn't lie to you about something so serious. It's supposed to be highly effective, but there's a chance of failure.”
He laughed bitterly. “Yeah, like what kind of chance? I bet you'd have better odds of winning the jackpot in the lottery.”
“I don't know, but it happened.”
“When? How far along?”
I thought back to that night, the one I would never forget.
“The first time. The night you took my virginity over two months ago.”
“You were carrying this kid for two and a half months and never told me.”
“I really only knew for sure a couple of weeks ago.”
He retreated indoors to the kitchen and got himself another beer.
“How much longer were you going to keep this a secret?”
“I always planned to tell you before the wedding. I thought it was wrong to trap you in a marriage and then reveal the truth. You deserved to know.”
He crumpled the beer can on his knee and threw it out. “Yeah, then why didn't you tell me sooner? All the times we talked about getting married, and you never said a word.”
“Because.” I swallowed hard. “I was afraid of your reaction. I knew you didn't want kids. I thought I was going to lose you.”
I wanted him to come to me, to hug and hold me, and tell me he wasn't going anywhere. Instead, he stayed put and gazed out the window.
“You're going to keep it.”
“Yeah, I am. I'm not asking you to stick around and take care of it, though, okay? And if you want to call off the wedding, I understand.”
“Then we'd lose Shady Acres.”
“I know.”
Again, he was silent. I hated his silence. Would much rather him smiling, making jokes or flirting with me. Anything but this.
His phone buzzed. He checked it, sighed, and slipped his jacket on before grabbing his keys.
“Wait! Where are you going?”
“Out. I gotta clear my head.”
I ran after him, although I felt like an idiot for it. “You're just going to leave me here like this? What about the baby?”
“
I don't know. I just... I need to get out of here for a while.”
How could he abandon me now, when I needed his support the most? I wiped the tears from my eyes as he walked past me and out to the hall.
There was only one more thing I could think of to say or do.
“Jayce, wait. Do you know why I want to keep this baby so badly?”
He paused. “Why is that?”
“Because, I... I love you.”
He kept his back turned to me. There was a hitch in his breath, but he didn't return the words.
“I know you do, Pink.”
That was all he had to say?
“I'm going home. Have fun with your friends, or your other girlfriend, or whoever you're going to see.”
I ran down the hall and around the corner to my apartment. Threw myself down on the couch and sobbed as I waited for him to come and knock.
But he never did.
Chapter 22 - Jayce
“You were right, dude.”
Max pulled his stick back and thrust into the six ball so hard it bounced off the table. He cursed; all the other guys watching laughed at him.
“What're you laughing about, assholes?” He threw the stick down. “Uh, right about what?”
“Remember when you said I got Elle pregnant? Yeah. That.”
He gaped at me like I'd grown a tail. Brett's jaw fell. Carter, however, smiled and smacked me on the back.
“Good for you, man. I think you'll be a great dad.”
“You... Wow.” Max shook his head. “I was just messing with you the other day. How did you find out?”
A cocktail waitress came around to take drink orders and drop off Max's sixth shot of tequila tonight. She came to me next, but I waved her off. I was too messed up in the head to be drinking.
“Elle told me a couple of hours ago. She's two months or so along, I guess.”
“How'd it happen?”
Brett pushed him into the pool table. “What's the matter with you? That ain't your business.”
“Her pill failed.”
Max snickered. “Failed, or she conveniently stopped taking it? Chicks her age start getting kinda desperate. Some of 'em will do whatever it takes to get knocked up. Cheaper than paying a fertility clinic, I suppose.”
“No. She said she was taking it, and I believe her.”
