A high-pitched laugh assailed her ears, and her hands moved to cover them. She did not understand what was so amusing, but she made a mental note to avoid approaching even a trace of humor. That laugh was not one she wished to hear often.
“Where are we?” she asked, partly knowing the answer but still fearing to hear it out loud.
“This is Lake Vostok,” he answered.
She did not see a lake anywhere. Glancing up at the sky again, she began to feel true trepidation. “Vostok. But this is not Russia, is it?”
“Russia, my dear. How quaint and pedestrian. No, we are in a far more exciting place.”
Aazuria was too tired to protest that she had traveled extensively in Russia and found it fascinating. The thoughts simmered in her mind and dissipated before they could be released. Even her brain seemed to be conserving energy.
“Aren’t you going to prod me?” he asked. “Don’t you want to know?”
She pulled the thick layers more tightly around her, not wishing to engage in this type of game.
“Fine,” he said with disappointment. “We’re in Antarctica. Utter isolation. How’s about them apples?”
“Antarctica?” she asked him despairingly. “What could you attempt to achieve by bringing me here?”
“Well, the look on your face, for one thing.”
Aazuria shook her head in frustration. “Why, of all the places…”
“This is the only location they will never think to search for you,” answered Prince Zalcan Hamnil with a smug smile. “And even if they did, they would never find you.”
She turned her face skyward again, examining the unfamiliar stars from this utmost unfamiliar angle. When she scrutinized the heavens, she could feel the magnitude of distance that was separating her from her family. Trevain was almost directly on the other side of the planet. The foolish hope that this was some elaborate ruse floated to the forefront of her thoughts. A joke, maybe. Could there be some kind of false sky on some kind of false ceiling…
“It’s also the only place from which you would never think to try and escape,” said the prince, in his shrill voice. “You’re a smart cookie. It’s already May—you’re smack dab in the middle of 14 million square miles of inhospitable ice. And there’s even more frozen ice in the seas around that. Pretty much nothing can get in or out of Antarctica until November, least of all one lonesome gal like you.”
“It seems that you have won,” Aazuria conceded. Even as she said this, she was trying to visualize her options. She was sure that there were research stations somewhere on the continent, and they would surely have access to radios or satellite communication devices. But how would she find them? It seemed like she would have to be patient.
“We’re going to hibernate here for the winter,” he said cheerfully. “Just you and me. Isn’t that a pleasant prospect?”
Aazuria sighed, crossing her arms across her chest to contend with the cold. She suddenly registered the white dome from which he had exited. “You have an underground dwelling here?” she asked hopefully. Although she wanted to go home, she realized that she first needed to focus on staying alive. Warmth seemed like the greatest necessity at the moment.
“Yes,” he answered, extending his hand to her. “Will you join me?”
She had no choice. She could not survive the winter in Antarctica. There were no roads and no cities. She had to depend on her captor. She extended her gloved hand and placed it in his, allowing him to lead her into small dome-shaped structure. His manner was surprisingly chivalrous as he entered the pod after her, and entered digits into a machine. The small machine revealed itself to be an elevator of sorts when it began to lower itself. Aazuria was alarmed by the sudden movement, but when the elevator continued moving downward at a slow pace for several minutes, her fright intensified.
“Where are we going?” she asked him.
“About two miles under the glacier there’s a huge lake warmed by geothermal heat. There’s a little research cabin down there with just enough room and provisions for us to stay over the winter.”
“Dammit,” Aazuria cursed. Of course, the elevator would be locked and she would be unable to exit on her own. She immediately began wondering if she had not been better off staying on the surface. There was a good chance that once she was trapped under the ice, she would never find her way back up again. She did not know if she even trusted the elevator.
The prince seemed thrilled by her discomfort. When the elevator came to a stop, he punched in more digits to open the doors before bowing forward from the waist to allow her to exit first. She complied, examining the small cabin. There was only one room with one small bed. At the very least, it was warm.
“Home, sweet home,” her captor declared. “Get comfortable.”
“Why are you keeping me here?” Aazuria asked, turning to the prince.
“It’s a long story. You are a difficult woman to see, Queen Aazuria, and an even more difficult woman to kidnap. I couldn’t risk you getting away. Consider it a compliment to your capability that I went to such great lengths. Get it? Great lengths?” He laughed at his own joke.
She did not consider it funny. Her eyes scanned the array of canned foods, and noted the basic burner for cooking. She closed her heavy eyelids. She had a feeling that she would not be able to escape anytime soon. What made her especially nervous was that Prince Zalcan had been treating her so carefully. Usually when murderers became gentle, it preceded a vicious act of some sort. She found herself flinching defensively every time he moved, and reaching to the various places on her body where she usually had a knife stashed. Of course, there were no knives.
Aazuria knew that this man had killed her youngest sister in the most brutal of ways, and had tried to do the same to Visola. For that, she would never forgive him and she would never relax around him. But she would be prudent; she counseled herself to always be complacent and never rude or sarcastic. She needed to stay alive. Of course, the prince had gone to great trouble to capture her and keep her confined, which suggested she had some value to him, but she would not take this for granted.
“We only have supplies to last us about a year. I’ll probably leave way before that—I’ll go in November and spend a few months at my father’s palace. When I return, I will bring more provisions.”
“So I’ll be alone down here from November until April?” she asked.
“That’s right. But don’t get too excited—you’ll be all locked up.”
“You really have won.” Aazuria said, turning to him. “Does it amuse you to see me belittled like this?”
“More than I can ever express,” he admitted. “We’re going to be together for a long while.”
She released a sigh. “Good to know, Prince Zalcan.”
“I told you this before, but I suppose you were too drugged to understand me. You can call me Hamnil—Zalcan is the family name. I guarantee you, Sweetie—when I’m the only human being you get to see for years, you’re going to soon find even this hideous face beautiful.”
Aazuria had chosen to sleep on the floor while letting her captor take the bed. She had waited until he was asleep before she had turned over and placed her hands flat upon the floor. She silently exhaled as she lifted her torso off the ground slowly, and once her arms were fully extended, she lowered herself back down. When the prince had first abducted her, she had bargained internally: If I live through this, I vow that I will learn to fight as well as Visola. Now that she had been spared her life, she had to fulfill the pact. She tried to keep her breathing soft and steady so that she would not wake the prince. Thus, while he was sleeping, she did as many pushups as she could to strengthen her body. Then she did a dozen more. It was not much, but it was all she could manage. It was a start.
Day one of captivity in the subglacial Lake Vostok, Aazuria mentally recorded. She was sure that there was paper of some sort somewhere in the abandoned research station, but she wanted to keep her notes internalized. Nothing would be p
rivate anymore except her mind. My abdomen is still flat, so there is no indication that I am with child. My captor is not aware of my condition. I can only pray to Sedna that the chloroform and sedatives did not harm my child. I should set a goal to try and escape before my stomach becomes too telling—not only will I be incapacitated by the progression of the pregnancy, but I cannot predict if it will increase my captor’s violence towards me. I must protect my son or daughter at all costs. I must keep my mind and body sharp, and I am sure that I will find a way home. She continued pushing herself off the ground and slowly lowering herself.
Trevain must be looking for me, but even if he scours all of land and sea, he will never find me here. That is fine; it is not his fault, and I am not a helpless maiden held captive in a tower, awaiting her hero’s rescue. I am Queen Aazuria Vellamo, the leader of Adlivun. As it stands, I am not the greatest warrior, and I do not have the greatest strength. This Zalcan Hamnil fellow was able to overpower me, and for that I am ashamed. But it will not happen again. I only need to be more powerful than he is, and I can easily accomplish that. Today I will be reborn as a new person, with unyielding focus and single-mindedness.
The only thoughts I can afford to have are thoughts of escape. The only physical energy I can afford to spend is towards self-preservation. As long as there is breath in my body, I will not cease to seek liberty.
Chapter 18: In Her Element
Day Thirty in Vostok. I never would have believed it possible to feel sympathy for this man considering how he tore my life apart at the seams. Unfortunately, being trapped in a small room under thousands of tons of solid ice is forcing us to do the unthinkable: we’re having conversations. If at some point in the future, I look back upon this moment and revisit this permanent mental journal with horror and incomprehension, I would like to assure my future self that she has surely forgotten what this felt like. Cabin fever, is that what this is called? Surprisingly, Hamnil has not made any sexual advances or any overt threats of physical violence towards me. I am constantly on guard and expecting the worst, but I am not quite sure what the worst is, exactly. I certainly could not have expected a worse location to be held captive.
“Rumors of your feats have been carried afar by the currents. I heard you killed your father,” Hamnil said as they sat across the small table, eating dinner.
“Yes. That is correct,” Aazuria responded as she forced herself to consume the salty canned foods for the calories she desperately needed. Note: My appetite is increasing dramatically. I am still not sure if I miscarried on the trip over here, or if those were just nightmares. Considering that every single night I seem to be dreaming of horrific miscarriages, I am going to assume that those were dreams, and I am still pregnant. Every morning when I wake up, my hands immediately travel to my abdomen to check for growth and hardness. I can never be sure if there is any difference, or if I am just imagining a change…
“What did that feel like?” he asked as he ate. “Killing Kyrosed Vellamo?”
“Why does everyone always want to know that?” Aazuria responded with a sigh. “I do not like to revisit that day.”
“I don’t know about everyone else, but my father was pretty cruel to me when I was a kid,” Hamnil admitted. “I wasn’t as strong as my brothers. I wasn’t as skilled a warrior. I was kind of the runt of the litter and…”
“Gay?” Aazuria asked, as she forced herself to swallow the bitter sustenance.
“How dare you!” the prince shouted, rising to his feet.
“Are you not?” Aazuria asked in confusion as she shoveled another forkful of the preserved food into her mouth.
“I… am not sure,” the prince said, returning to his seat abruptly. “I think I might be, but I have to fix it. It’s not acceptable to be gay in my family. We’re warriors—the mighty Clan of Zalcan. I can’t be gay.”
Aazuria paused in her eating. “Where are you getting that? There are many mighty warriors who have enjoyed being with other men. It does not make any difference to your fighting ability or your leadership skills.”
“Everyone else seems to believe it makes me inferior.”
“My goodness! Then ignore them. Look at how successful and enterprising you are—you captured me, chloroformed me, and locked me up with you in Antarctica. Isn’t that proof enough of your skill and cunning?” she asked. Note: Why on earth am I trying to boost the ego of the enemy? Am I going mad? Do I actually feel sorry for him? I must blame this on pregnancy hormones. The old Aazuria would never show any kind of pity to a murderer! She frowned and continued to gorge on the canned goods. “You also do not need to go around raping women to prove anything,” she muttered.
“So you heard about that.”
“Rumors of your feats have been carried afar by the currents,” Aazuria echoed. She popped a bottle containing multivitamins and ingested two of them. Note: The food here is bland and severely lacking in nutrition. I have not eaten anything fresh in far too long, and I am badly craving a bit of seafood. I was especially grateful to find that some kind and wise soul had thought to store multivitamins in the kitchen cabinets. If I am still pregnant, and I truly pray that I am, I feel much better knowing that I have some kind of small prenatal regimen. I wish I could do more. I had always imagined that if I did have a child, they would have the best possible start in life. I guess it is my fault that I never had a backup plan for being stuck in Antarctica while pregnant. I hate surprises.
“You’re the queen of Adlivun,” the prince said. “I’ve heard from the royalty of numerous sea-dwelling nations that you were the most beautiful woman in the oceans, and the most intelligent. Do you think you can help me?”
Aazuria rolled her eyes at the exaggeration. “With what?”
“Do you think you can cure me? So that my father and my brothers don’t look down me anymore…”
Aazuria sighed deeply. She tried to prevent it, but her heart already ached with pity. “How old are you, Hamnil?”
“One hundred and fifty,” he answered.
“You are so young,” she responded sadly. “You should be more confident in yourself. There is nothing wrong with you, nothing lacking. Look at what you survived! Vachlan Suchos tried to kill you, and you’re still here. Do you know how many people can say that? Probably none. So for that alone, you have proved how special and clever you are. Forget what your father and brothers think—families are like that. You could conquer the whole world, and they would still look at you as though you were a bawling infant. It takes strangers to appreciate your strength and success.”
The prince’s eyes began to tear up and his voice became even shriller than usual. “I hate Vachlan for what he did to me. I admired him. I thought of him as a brother!”
“Hamnil, that’s what he does. He betrayed me as well. The man has no loyalty, and he just goes where he pleases and does what suits him.”
“I was handsome before he destroyed my face, Queen Aazuria. If you had seen me before…”
“I am sure you were very dashing,” she responded gently. A small smile touched her lips. “If it is any consolation, Prince Hamnil—before you kidnapped me, I managed to slice a decent chunk out of Vachlan’s face. He will be scarred for life.”
“Really?” the man asked, in an excited girlish voice. His eyes lit up, and he almost looked as if he wished to hug Aazuria. “That does cheer me up.” He returned to staring at his plate for a few minutes before he looked up at Aazuria strangely. “Sometimes it feels like you’re not really the enemy. Sometimes it feels like you’re more on my side than my own family and allies.”
“I believe in kindness,” Aazuria answered, lowering her eyes so he could not read the lie.
“And after all I’ve done to you, the fact that you can sit and share a meal with me civilly…” The man shook his head. “It changes the way I feel about all people. No one has ever been so good to me.”
“You could have killed me long ago,” Aazuria said softly. “I am grateful that you spared my lif
e.” She returned to eating, and felt a bit of pleasure. The bastard thinks that I am fond of him. For Sedna’s sake! How could I ever forget that he sliced Corallyn’s limbs off and sent them to me in separate boxes? How could I forget that he tried to rape Visola? Yes, I believe in kindness. But never to those who have hurt the ones I love. Nevertheless, this is a stroke of fortune. I am pleased that he is softening up to me. Perhaps this will be of use when I execute the plan for my escape.
Tonight, when he is sleeping, I will continue with my strengthening exercises. If I feel weak and want to give up, I will just ask myself, “What would Visola do?” The answer is simple. Visola would have been strong to begin with and would not have allowed herself to be imprisoned in the Antarctic. It is already too late to be strong enough to prevent what has happened, and thus I must be ten times as strong as I wasn’t in order to eradicate the consequences of my weakness.
Day Sixty. I will never escape from this cabin.
This is not a depressed or mournful thought—this is realization followed by acceptance. I must change my plans. Having been out of the water for quite some time, my body is aching. I am aging rapidly. I have never been out of the water for so long consecutively—not without a little swim here and there. I cannot cope with this.
Also, I am positive that I am still pregnant. I truly need to plan accordingly. Time is running out. It would be ideal if I could make Hamnil fall in love with me—that would be the best protection. Except there is that whole issue of me being female. If I could get him to trust me completely, it would be helpful. A combination of kind words and gestures should do the trick.
She began by cooking her captor breakfast.
Sacred Breath Series (Books 1-4) Page 78
