by Amy Vansant
“Fair enough. I know he gets the credit. But I did hit the closing bull’s-eye.”
“Yes, you did. Cheers.”
The two of them clinked Chicken Clubs.
“So...you want to go somewhere quiet?” Sebastian asked after taking a sip.
Emily paused, mid sip. She lowered her glass from her lips.
“Oh no. I’m not falling for this again.”
“Falling for what?”
“I’m going to get my darts together and pay my tab. And you’re going to disappear.”
Sebastian shook his head side to side.
“Nooo, why would I do that?”
“That’s what you did last time!”
“I did? When?”
“Last night!”
“Oh!” Sebastian snapped his fingers. “That’s what I forgot to do. I knew there was something; it’s been bothering me all day.”
Emily rolled her eyes back and stared at the ceiling. “You forgot me. Wow. You sure know how to make a girl feel special.”
“I’m sorry. That was awful of me. I had a weird night last night.”
Emily squinted, peering into his blue eyes.
Sebastian leaned forward until their noses touched, squinting back.
“So you want to go somewhere?” he said.
“Hmmm...”
Emily looked from his left eye to his right, trying not to laugh.
“Hmmm...” echoed Sebastian. He looked from her left eye to her right five times, very quickly.
Emily sniffed and leaned back, worried she’d burst out laughing and shower his face with spit.
“So, if I go get my pack and whatnot, you’ll be here when I get back?”
He nodded. “I am like a tree, grasshopper, rooted to this spot.”
“Fine. You better be.”
Emily hopped from the bar stool and traveled to the front snug to grab her pack. She’d settled her bar tab earlier. She’d been testing a new theory; playing darts with only two drinks under her belt. She thought it helped. Experimentation had identified a sweet spot for darts and drinking. She had to drink enough to relax, but not so much that her game began to suffer. She’d had two Chicken Clubs earlier in the evening and then stopped, and her game had been better than usual.
As Emily entered the snug, she ran into Benny. It felt like running into a rhinoceros.
“Hey!” he said.
“Hey!” she said.
“What are you up to? You look crazy happy.”
“Sebastian wants to go somewhere quiet,” she whispered to him.
Benny laughed. “Oh, jeez, don’t let me get in your way then!” he said. “Run woman! Run to him!”
Emily laughed and trotted back to find Sebastian still sitting at the bar, staring into middle distance.
“Ready?” she asked.
Sebastian snapped out of his thoughts.
“Yep!” he said, standing.
The two left the bar. Outside, Sebastian reached into his pocket and pulled out his pack of cigarettes.
“Where do you want to go?” he asked, the cigarette bouncing in his lips as he talked and lit it at the same time.
“I don’t know,” she said. “I thought you had a spot in mind.”
“Not really. I probably should have thought a little farther ahead.”
“What were you thinking about just a minute ago when you were staring at the ceiling?”
Sebastian considered her question for a moment.
“You know how there’s that candy called Smarties?”
Emily nodded.
“Well, they should make another one called “Dummy Bears.”
“So you were having some pretty deep thoughts there.”
“It’s what I do. Someone has to.”
“There are already lollipops called Dum Dums.”
“Ooh! Good point. Damn. Barely off the ground and I already have competition.”
“And the makers of Gummy Bears will probably sue you into next year.”
“Details for lawyers,” said Sebastian, closing his eyes and shooing at the air.
They stopped walking and stood on the sidewalk, a few doors down from the Irish Rover, in front of an alley. Emily worried if they didn’t go somewhere quickly, Sebastian might wander off.
“Do we know where we’re going?” Emily asked.
Sebastian stepped toward Emily, so close she needed to take a step back to keep from falling backwards.
“I have an idea,” he said in a conspiratorial whisper. He guided her gently to the alley.
“You’re not going to mug me, are you?” she asked.
“Something like that.”
Tucked in the alley, Emily’s back to the wall, Sebastian kissed her, his lips lingering against hers, his body drawing closer. She felt the touch of his fingers on the back of her shoulder sliding downward along her naked arm. He took her hand in his and pulled back, searching her eyes.
“Okay?” he said.
Emily licked her lips.
“If I’d known you mugged like this, I’d have wandered outside your house at night wearing all my best jewelry.”
“And nothing else?” asked Sebastian leaning in and kissing her neck.
“Oh god,” said Emily, her hand reaching up to hold the back of his head, praying he’d never stop. “I didn’t say the ‘and nothing else’ bit because I thought it’d be corny.”
“It was,” Sebastian mumbled between kisses. “I deeply regret saying it.”
Sebastian worked his way back to Emily’s mouth and they kissed until she had to pull away to breathe.
“I have a pool table and a dart board,” she blurted.
“Congratulations,” Sebastian said, his hand cupping her breast as he left a trail of kisses along her collarbone. “I have bad knees and a nine iron.”
“No, I mean we could go to my house. It’s quiet, the booze is free, and I have a pool table and a dart board.”
Sebastian stopped. “I don’t know how I can argue with that.”
He took her hand and led her towards their cars. She had to break into a trot to keep up with his long strides.
Emily and Sebastian reached the Rover parking lot.
“You can follow me in your truck,” she said.
“Okay.”
They walked toward their respective cars.
“Wait. How did you know I have a truck?”
Emily bit her lip. Because I’ve been stalking you for months didn’t sound right.
“I’ve seen you pull up before,” she said, shrugging.
Emily slipped into her car and waited for Sebastian to pull out. She left the parking lot and headed for her house, checking her mirror every few seconds to be sure she hadn’t lost her tail.
Emily pulled into the driveway of her modest ranch and stepped out of her car. She shook with excitement, and drew a calming breath.
Sebastian pulled beside her and met her on the walkway that led from the driveway to the door.
“This is your house?” he asked.
“No, but it looks easy to break into.”
“Ha ha. No, I mean, it’s nice.”
“Thank you, it isn’t anything special, that’s for sure, but it works.”
Emily opened the door and Duppy walked over to say hi to the stranger.
“Hiya, puppy,” said Sebastian, petting the old man.
“That’s Duppy.”
“Hey ya, Dupster, Duparama.” Duppy leaned into Sebastian’s ear-scratching, loving every moment of it.
“He seems nice. Nicer than some dogs I know,” he added, muttering.
They stared at each other. The sudden passion in the alley had felt so natural, but now, in the glare of her kitchen lights, things had grown awkward.
“You want a drink?” she asked.
“Is a bear Catholic?”
Confident scratching time had ended, Duppy padded back into the bedroom to go back to sleep.
Emily kept cranberry in the house for homemade Chick
en Clubs, and mixed two in pint glasses, the same way they served them at the Irish Rover.
She handed Sebastian his drink and gave him the nickel tour. Rather than walk him to the bedroom, she pointed down the hall and said, “Bedrooms and my office are back there.” She feared standing in the hallway, staring at her bed with Sebastian, would cause her head to explode.
“What happened to your wall?” asked Sebastian, pointing to the end of the hall and the drywall patch. Mark had fixed the wall, but she hadn’t repainted.
Emily blushed at the memory.
“Oh, just an accident. Tripped over the dog.” She chose not to share who tripped or the difficulties of walking with a girl wrapped around your waist.
Sebastian followed Emily to the basement where she kept her new dartboard and the pool table.
“My parents moved to a smaller place and had nowhere to fit our old pool table, so I ended up with it.”
“Nice,” said Sebastian. He walked to the sliding glass door that led to the backyard and peered outside. “Okay if I go outside?”
“Sure,” she said.
He gave the door a tug but it didn’t move.
“I’m weak,” he said.
Emily laughed, removed the half broom handle that served as her security system, and slid open the door.
“Well, now I feel a little better.”
They walked outside. The temperature was perfect, and the humidity had eased. The sky was clear but for a few wispy clouds illuminated by the light of the nearly full moon.
Sebastian pulled out a cigarette and lit it.
“How long have you smoked?” she asked.
“Since I was in my teens, but I don’t smoke all the time, only when I drink and when I play golf.”
“Why when you play golf?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Habit I guess.”
“Does Greta smoke?”
Emily regretted the words the moment they left her lips. She shouldn’t have mentioned Greta’s name and ruined such a nice moment. Did their kiss mean he and Greta were over? Emily needed to know, but right now, she wanted to hold on to this moment for as long as she could.
Sebastian seemed unfazed by the inquiry.
“Not really. Sometimes when she’s out with her hipster-doofus friends she’ll have a few or they’ll smoke cloves or roll their own or some other painfully cool smoking activity.”
Emily chuckled. “I have a girlfriend whose boyfriend rolls his own, but he doesn’t actually smoke.”
“That’s taking it to a new level. That’s like my brother and me smoking hay when we were kids.”
“Damn. You are cool.”
“I was the Elvis of nine-year-olds.”
“I smoked in college, on and off for about two years, and only when I drank,” said Emily. “I think that’s a law, right? That you have to smoke in college?”
Emily walked over to the large hammock she had sitting on the brick patio and sat in it. Sebastian looked at the patio chairs and then joined Emily in the hammock. They fell together, hips and shoulders touching, the hammock making it impossible to separate.
Emily wanted to know so much, about his feelings for her and his situation with Greta, but she knew poking him for answers would only make him more reticent to share. Instead, they sat there, sipping their Chicken Clubs, reclined and staring at the stars.
Sebastian finished his cigarette and looked for a place to put the butt.
“Just toss it,” she said. “I’ll get it later.”
“No,” said Sebastian. He got up and walked over to a planter she had on the edge of the patio, half filled with dirt. A geranium had lived and died there. Sebastian used it for an ashtray and returned to the hammock. He put his drink on the bricks beneath them.
“I’m sorry, it’s a terrible habit. It stinks. I’m going to stop going to the Rover and then I’ll quit for good. It’s just impossible there.”
Emily panicked.
“When? You’re going to stop going to the Rover?”
Sebastian laughed. “Well, not any time really soon.”
Sebastian lifted his left arm and put it above Emily’s head. Gently, he rested it against the top of her skull, until she leaned forward and he slipped it behind her. He used his feet to rock them back and forth. Emily appreciated the help; she couldn’t reach the ground.
Emily and Sebastian swayed for half an hour, silent, Emily’s head nestled in the crook of his arm. Emily looked up and saw Sebastian’s eyes closed.
“Don’t you have to go home?” she asked, her voice soft and sleepy. She, too, was tired.
Emily felt Sebastian shake his head before she heard him.
“No.”
“What about Greta?”
Sebastian paused. Emily wondered if asking was a mistake, but she had to know.
“Greta and I broke up. I guess I thought you knew.”
“You broke up?” she said, lifting her head to look at him. Suddenly, she felt very awake. “How would I know? You’re so private. It’s not like I get the Sebastian Newsletter.”
“Sorry. Like a month ago. More than that, technically, but it’s complicated. I still need to move out. So...it’s just a weird situation.”
Emily stared at him.
“Over a month ago?”
He nodded.
“But you just bought her an expensive handbag!”
“What?”
Sebastian seemed genuinely confused and Emily began to doubt her eavesdropping skills. She also doubted the wisdom of continuing her story. She might look crazy obsessing about the origins of a handbag.
“Greta was in the bar the other day with an orange Marc Jacobs purse. She said you bought it for her.”
“Me? That’s hilarious on several levels. I know the one you’re talking about, but I assumed she bought it for herself. It wasn’t me. I didn’t even know it was expensive.”
“Huh,” said Emily.
They rocked again. Emily returned her head to his shoulder.
“You know...” said Emily. “I could help you find a place.”
“You know a place?”
“No, but I could help you find one. Hell, I could never rest until you found one.”
Sebastian chuckled.
So much for playing coy.
Emily snuggled and placed her head and left hand on Sebastian’s chest. She felt Sebastian kiss the top of her head.
Emily tilted her head back; the light spilling from the basement, bright enough to see Sebastian staring back at her.
Tentatively, their lips brushed. Nothing terrible happened. Emboldened, they leaned into each other, kissing more desperately, until embracing like lost lovers reunited. Sebastian rolled toward her, the weight of his body on hers enflaming her passion. His hand ran down the side of her body and she felt him stroke her hip, grabbing her buttocks and pulling her closer to him. Feverishly, she began to unbutton his white work shirt.
“Wait, wait,” Sebastian said.
He rolled back to lie beside her once more, both of them breathing heavily.
“What?” She’d waited for this moment for so long, stopping didn’t feel like a viable option.
Sebastian slipped his arm out from behind her and rubbed his face with both his hands. “I want to do this right.”
“I thought we were doing a pretty good job.”
Sebastian smirked. He gave her a quick kiss.
“Can I sleep here?”
Emily squinted at him. “Are you asking me or yourself?”
“I’m asking you. Do you mind if I crash here tonight?”
“No. Now can we get back to our regularly scheduled programming?”
Sebastian stroked her cheek, and Emily closed her eyes, drinking in the feel of his touch.
Then, nothing happened.
Emily opened her eyes. Sebastian was still looking at her.
“Let’s go to bed,” he said. “Is that cool?”
Emily paused, wondering if it was a trick question.
“Yes!” she said, jumping out of the hammock. She held out a hand to help Sebastian up. He stood, groaning with the effort of pulling his lanky frame from the depths of the sagging netting.
He picked up his glass and she grabbed hers.
“Do you want me to get that cigarette butt out of the plant and put it somewhere?” he asked.
“No, that makes a better ashtray than it did a planter. At least I won’t have to water it.”
“You obviously did a great job with the last plant,” Sebastian said, shuffling toward the basement door.
They went upstairs and she led him to her bedroom.
“Can I borrow your bathroom?” he asked.
She turned on the bedroom light.
“You want to sleep over and now you want to use the bathroom, too? I never dreamed you were so high-maintenance.”
“Oh, you have no idea.” He entered her en-suite and closed the door.
Emily immediately burst into action. She stripped her clothes and threw on a simple chemise made from t-shirt material. She thought it would appear sexy, but casual. If Sebastian came out of the bathroom to find her squeezed into a black teddy, it might look a bit desperate. She jogged down the hall to the spare bathroom, washed her face and brushed her teeth with the new toothbrush and toothpaste she kept for guests. As she scrubbed, Emily realized they had done everything wrong. He should have used the guest toothbrush. Now it was too late.
Emily ran through her nightly ritual as if timed for speed. She bolted out of the guest bathroom, trying hard not to sound like a herd of cattle galloping down the hallway, and found her purse. She rummaged inside for her travel makeup and bolted back down the hall. She poked her head in her bedroom. Sebastian was still in the bathroom. She spun and reached the guest bathroom with one leap and re-applied mascara, blush and lipstick.
She heard the toilet flush in the other bathroom. Panicking, she placed the makeup in the spare tub and pulled the curtain to hide it; no time to return it to her purse. She ran to the bedroom, bouncing off the hallway wall, and dove into the bed, thankful Duppy had chosen the dog bed in her office over her own bed this evening. She arranged herself on the bed like a bouquet of flowers for maximum beauty.
Emily looked up sleepily as Sebastian walked out of the bathroom, as if she had been lying there all evening, just waiting for him.
“I borrowed some toothpaste,” he said. “Just on my finger.”
