As Sierra pulled off the too short jeans, a sudden sharp cramp grabbed at her abdomen from deep inside, and then she felt warm wetness gush out. She looked down and emitted a small scream when she saw the insides of her thighs red with blood. “What is…?” Then realization hit her.
Pam looked up at Sierra’s distressed cry, and her own eyes followed to where Sierra stared at herself in shock.
“I think I’ve started a period.” Sierra looked up at her mother and then burst into tears.
“Honey, Baby!” Pam gathered her daughter into her arms. Sierra sobbed with her face buried and with her emotions jumbled between feelings of distress and relief that she finally had proof of her developing womanhood.
Pam soothed and comforted her; telling her, “You’re a woman now.” She drew a hot bath and helped Sierra into the tub. “It helps relieve the cramps,” she explained. Afterwards, she showed Sierra where she kept her own supply of feminine products. “You can share mine until you figure out what works best for you.”
Later, with the promise of dinner at a restaurant of her choice to celebrate her new status as a woman, Sierra agreed to shop for her school wardrobe. She picked out three new pairs of jeans, five new tee-shirts, and two winter sweaters. Just because she was a woman now didn’t mean she had to totally change her style.
*****
The following morning, River had a few hours away from Pegasus to spend with Sierra and João.
“Tess fired the last girl and Manuel is working with the new one today,” River explained over tea. This was the third person hired to fill Sierra’s position. “Anybody worth anything isn’t going to work for what Tess is willing to pay; except you, of course. I think Tess is realizing what a mistake she made in firing you.”
Sierra couldn’t help taking satisfaction that no one was working out, although she knew it increased the workload for River and Manuel. “I may be a fool, but I don’t regret working there,” Sierra defended herself. “At least I learned from you about handling horses, and you gave me a good start riding. I will always be thankful for that.”
“Would you come back if Tess changed her mind?” River asked with a look that Sierra thought was actually hopeful.
She thought for a few minutes. “I guess I would but on different terms. I think I would ask for pay.”
“Good for you,” River said with sincerity.
“And I would still want my time here with you and Fiel,” Sierra said, looking at João, who smiled back and pushed the plate with one last scone toward her. “But I doubt she’ll change her mind.” Sierra picked up the scone, her second, and João got up to refill the plate. They always needed more food when River joined them.
“She might,” River stated. João returned with another full plate of pastries and handed them to River.
“I can’t believe school is starting in just two weeks,” Sierra changed the subject, looking toward the pasture where she could see the back end of Fiel grazing, his tail swishing rhythmically at flies. She had always looked forward to a new school year, but now for the first time in her life, she regretted the end of her summer’s routine.
“Ah yes, the opportunity to enjoy free education and better yourself,” João proclaimed as he refilled his teacup.
“I’m a little nervous about starting high school. River, we’ll be going to the same school now,” Sierra commented.
River stuffed half a scone in his mouth and said something indistinguishable.
“What subjects are you taking?” João asked.
Sierra recited her freshman schedule; all courses aimed at going on to college.
“Very good; a well-rounded curriculum.” João turned his attention to River. “What are you taking this year?” Sierra detected a poignancy in his tone and noted River’s posture tensing.
“I don’t remember,” he mumbled.
João shook his head in disgust and stated sarcastically, “How convenient.”
“I don’t want to talk about school,” River retorted.
Sierra realized this was an old discussion for the two of them. She wondered if João was aware of River’s plans to quit school.
“That’s the problem with you, young man. You don’t like to talk about or face anything that is unpleasant for you.”
“Why should I?”
“Why shouldn’t you?”
River glared at João, defensive anger rising. “I…” River started. He threw his last bit of scone down on his plate. “I just can’t. I’m not good at school.”
“You don’t try.”
“You don’t know.”
“You are afraid and you are a coward,” João kept pressing.
“I’m too stupid,” River insisted, his voice raised a decibel.
“What have I said to you about saying that?” João’s own voice rose in timbre. “You tell yourself so because it gives you an excuse.”
Sierra watched the two of them glower at each other, feeling very uncomfortable.
João sighed deeply, softened his expression and lowered his voice. “River, if you would only let me help you. Studying is a skill that can be learned, just like riding a horse.”
“I don’t need school.”
“Your mother would…”
“Don’t bring my mother into this.” River pushed himself violently away from the table, stomped to the edge of the porch, vaulted down and took off at a jog. Storm got up from where she lay on the porch next to Charlie, shook herself, and trotted off after River, looking back once as if to apologize for her master’s rude behavior.
Sierra and João watched River until he ran out of sight. “That is his answer to all his problems, run away.” João sighed deeply, shaking his head. He reached for his cigarettes but tossed the pack back down and turned to Sierra apologetically. “Sierra, I am not feeling well this morning. If you don’t mind I believe I will leave you to clean up. I’m going to lie down for a bit.”
“Of course,” Sierra agreed. She did not like the grayish hue, especially around his mouth, visible in spite of his suntanned skin. She watched as he slowly rose from the table and went inside.
*****
The last few days of summer flew by. Sierra continued with Fiel’s training program, looking forward to the upcoming championship event, the culmination of the combined training season.
On the last Sunday before school started, João coached Sierra and Fiel through a short flat lesson and then had them finish over a course of low, practice jumps. “I must admit, adding a little jumping into his work has been beneficial,” he stated, noting the increased energy Fiel displayed in his daily sessions. “He is fit and ready. Our job now is to maintain that fitness without overtraining or having him injured. We have just one week before the championship.”
Sierra nodded in agreement. She knew what he meant, having witnessed overtraining in so many of the horses at Pegasus.
“We will change our routine,” João continued. “You come after school next week and we will have Fiel wait for you.”
“Thanks,” Sierra agreed, grateful that he was willing to change his routine for her.
“And if you see that River, you tell him I miss him, okay?”
“Sure, but he hasn’t come over for dinner lately. I guess he’s avoiding both of us.”
“Yes, that is his way.” João sighed in disappointment. “But maybe you will see him at school.”
“I hope so.”
*****
Monday morning, Sierra stood in front of the bathroom mirror getting ready for her first day of high school. In the past, she barely looked at herself in a mirror; just quick glances to make sure her face was clean and to part her hair before braiding it. But now she scrutinized the reflection staring back at her; long wet hair hanging past her shoulders and the freckles across her nose prominent from the summer sun. I’m almost fourteen. I’m a teenager. I have periods. I’m in high school. These thoughts ricocheted around in her mind. Maybe it was time to give up braids and put a litt
le more effort into her appearance.
With sudden determination, Sierra pulled out her mother’s blow dryer and dried her just-shampooed hair. It fluffed out with more body than she realized her hair possessed since she always pulled it tightly into braids. The sun had bleached the color to a very pale brown with golden tones. She thought her face looked small with her hair framing it, and she wasn’t sure she would be able to tolerate feeling the hair around her face all day. She parted her hair as if for braiding, and then brought the sides back and fastened them behind, letting the hair in back hang free.
Now for the freckles. She opened the drawer where her mother kept her make-up, and studied the items tossed together. Finding a tube of foundation, she dabbed a small amount over her nose and cheekbones and smoothed it in. Yes, the freckles are almost invisible. Next, she took up a tube of mascara and applied the brush gingerly to her top lashes. I actually have long lashes, she marveled, never having noticed before due to their light color.
Sierra smiled at herself, studying the effect. Am I pretty? It wasn’t something she had ever thought much about. Her image stared back; not ugly, but pretty..?
She shrugged, and laughing at herself, exited the bathroom to pull on new jeans and a light blue tee-shirt. Grabbing her backpack that she had filled last night, she left the cottage to wait for the school bus.
*****
“Wow, Sierra!” Allison exclaimed, coming up the row of lockers where they had agreed to meet as they talked on the phone last night. “You look fantastic! You should always wear your hair down.”
“You’re the one who looks fantastic,” Sierra replied, blushing, pleased at the praise, but also feeling by comparison, rather plain. Allison looked as if she had stepped off the page of a high-fashion magazine. Her shiny, soft curly black hair framed her fine facial bone structure and emphasized her large, dark eyes. She wore three earrings in each ear that sparkled above her long, graceful neck. The colors of her patterned short ruffled skirt matched her blouse, and she wore heeled sandals that accentuated the elegant shape of her long dancer’s legs. If guys don’t notice her this year, then they are total idiots, she mused, with the teeniest bit of envy.
They walked together to home room, greeting people they recognized. Sierra saw Billy and returned his wave, but quickly urged Allison onward. She had no intention of letting him latch onto her this year.
“Sierra,” someone called behind her. She turned and to her surprise, Katrina pushed through the crowd. “Hey, you look great. So, are you showing at championship this weekend?”
“Yes, are you?” Sierra was a little surprised but also pleased that Katrina seemed willing to resume a friendly attitude.
“Yeah, Calliope and I qualified.”
“Uh, where are Crystal and Gloria?”
Katrina snorted a laugh. “We don’t really hang out anymore; ever since I made the mistake of being honest with Crystal. I told her I thought River was a better rider than her.”
“You told her that?” Sierra asked, surprised.
“I said it in a nice way; sort of hinting that maybe she should listen to him.” Katrina made an ‘oh well’ face and shrugged her shoulders holding up her palms.
Sierra laughed appreciatively. “I guess I’ll see you at the championship then.”
“Yeah, are you going to ride that Andalusian?”
“Yes; actually he’s Lusitano.”
“Oh, whatever, he’s nice. Here’s my class, see ya,” Katrina turned away but then called out over her shoulder. “I miss you at the stable!”
Allison and Sierra looked at each other and Allison raised her eyebrows. “Interesting,” she said.
*****
There was one other person Sierra looked forward to seeing. How will he react to my new look? As they entered homeroom, she spied him just sitting down at a desk. Great, we have the same homeroom!
“Sierra!” He greeted happily as the two girls walked in. “Sit over here. Hi, Allison.”
“Hi, Luke,” Sierra returned the greeting, already feeling her face flush with heightened color. She also experienced another twinge of envy, wondering if he had invited them to sit near him because he had noticed how great Allison looked. She pushed the feelings down as totally unfair.
Cheerfully, Luke asked about their summer and chatted a little about his own before the bell rang and they turned to face forward.
“Are you riding in the horse show this weekend?” he whispered as the noise in the room abated.
“Yes,” Sierra whispered back.
“Great, Justin and I are going to watch the jumping. I’ll see you there.”
*****
26 Championship
There is something about jumping a horse over a fence, something that makes you feel good. Perhaps it is the risk, the gamble. In any event, it’s a thing I need. – William Faulkner
*****
The Pacific Regional Combined Training Championship was held over three days on Labor Day weekend, at a large equestrian center about one hundred miles from Firwood. Friday after school, they caravanned to the center; João driving his camper and pulling his two-horse trailer with Fiel inside, and Sierra and Pam following. Pam had requested Friday and Saturday nights off from her nursing home job so she could drive her daughter to the show and stay with her.
“Mom, it is so awesome that you’re finally going to see me ride,” Sierra exclaimed as they followed the horse trailer.
“I think I’m as excited as you are.” Pam flashed a grin. “You know, I haven’t had any vacation since I started nursing school. I think this weekend is going to be a nice break for me. And I can’t wait to see you ride.”
“Thanks again for coming. I know we really can’t afford it.”
“Honey, I am so proud of how conscientious you are about money, but sometimes it’s hard for me to think of my daughter having to worry about making ends meet.” Pam’s tone had turned serious. “You should only have to worry about keeping your grades up and relationships with your friends and your hobbies. Those are the kinds of worries a teenager should deal with; not money.”
“Don’t worry, Mom, I have all those worries.” They both laughed.
“Besides, the extra shifts I worked during school breaks is income I didn’t budget for; just to have a little extra for something special like this,” Pam assured her. “So we can afford it.”
They found the equestrian center easily; there were signs posted everywhere, even a freeway exit. A big sign and arrow indicating Exhibitor’s Entrance, directed them where to pull in and find the stall assigned to Fiel.
“Well, well, here we are,” João announced full of enthusiasm after they had parked. Sierra helped him unload Fiel from the trailer, remove his shipping wraps, and then settle him in his temporary home with a pile of grass hay and fresh water.
Sierra leaned on the stall door watching Fiel. He took a bite of hay, circled the stall, snorted at the walls, and finally stuck his head out next to her shoulder, as if to ask, “What’s this about?” She stroked his velvety nose, whispering reassurances. He went back for another mouthful of hay and came back to look out.
“He’s curious about what is going on but cannot bear to pass up something to eat,” João laughed. “So, let us go settle ourselves, then you can hand walk him around the grounds so he can see everything.”
The equestrian center had a large field next to the competition stabling, where competitors parked their horse trailers, campers, and motor homes, as well as others setting up tents. There was a large cement block building with public restrooms and showers. João planned to sleep in his camper and Pam had borrowed a tent, sleeping bags and pads from a friend. João and Pam moved their vehicles to a vacant spot and Sierra helped Pam set up the tent and organize their stuff inside. Then she went back to Fiel.
Horses, trainers, riders, grooms, and other support people milled around the grounds. The sights, sounds, and smells intrigued Sierra as much as it did Fiel as she led him up and down the a
isles in between the rows of stalls, and then around the warm-up areas. Everyone seemed in high spirits, passing her and Fiel with friendly smiles. A few people even stopped to compliment Fiel and ask his breed.
Many stables participated with a team of riders, and they decorated their stall areas with accessories in their team colors; tack trunks, canvas chairs, racks that hooked over the edges of stalls, and banners with the name of the barn. Most stables paid for one or two extra stalls that they converted into temporary tack rooms and dressing areas.
Sierra looked for and found the scarlet and blue colors of Pegasus Equestrian Center, hoping to find River and maybe some of the horses she used to care for. There were six stalls with the horses’ names on Pegasus placards, displaying the logo of a winged horse silhouette. One extra stall had been set up as a tack room with several trunks, saddle stands, bridles hanging from hooks, bales of hay, and the usual barn equipment of buckets, wheelbarrow, pitchfork, shovel, and broom. Another stall had canvas panels draped to cover the open grillwork and create a private dressing room.
“Rather posh,” Sierra said out loud. In spite of herself, she experienced a brief wave of envy that she was no longer a part of such a well-turned out and prominent team. But all she had to do was recall the blood on Galaxy’s leg after the rapping experience to quell any desire to be a part of Pegasus. No amount of fancy surroundings was worth that. “Seen enough?” she asked Fiel and patted him on the neck. “Let’s get you back to your hay.” She decided to settle Fiel back in his stall and then return to greet her old friends. She had glimpsed Calliope and Galaxy who had whinnied at her in recognition.
The Girl Who Loves Horses (Pegasus Equestrian Center Series) Page 20
