by Maggie Wells
“I know, I know,” Aleecia asked. “Can we go?” She tugged at Gina’s arm.
At Gina’s house, Aleecia raced to the closet. “What do you think will look good on me?” she asked.
“With that tight little body, baby, it will all look good on you,” Gina said, laughing.
Gina pawed through her closet and pulled out a pink halter dress. “I’ve never worn this. Let’s try it,” she said.
Aleecia stripped down to her panties and slipped the dress over her head. It felt tight around her waist.
“Is it too tight?” she asked. She stood in front of the mirror; her nipples were silhouetted by the soft fabric.
“Oh no,” Gina said. “You are rocking that dress. Let me fix your face.”
Gina pulled out her makeup bag. “Close your eyes,” she said.
Gina applied eyeliner and shadow.
“That’s too much,” Aleecia said.
“No, wait,” Gina said. She applied a few more brushstrokes. “Now, look.”
Aleecia opened her eyes and looked in the mirror. She grimaced.
“Don’t make a face,” Gina said, laughing. “Strike a pose. Like Rihanna.”
Aleecia struck a pose that she imagined was sophisticated.
Gina laughed. “This boy doesn’t stand a chance,” she said. “Go easy on him.”
At four o’clock, Aleecia texted Dawn. Where r u?
Dawn replied. Be there in 2
Dawn pulled into the driveway in a rusted-out pickup. Joyce was riding shotgun.
“Where am I supposed to sit?” Aleecia asked.
“Sit on my lap,” Joyce said. “Come on, we can fit.”
Dawn pulled into the beach parking lot and killed the engine.
“Shit, this place is packed,” Joyce said. “This is one big party.”
Aleecia started to get nervous. Everyone was wearing bikini tops and cut-off shorts. Was she overdressed?
The girls walked out toward the beach. Dawn saw someone she knew and peeled off. Joyce followed. Aleecia stood in the middle of the grassy lawn, wondering what to do.
“Yo,” Kyle said.
Aleecia spun around at the sound of his voice.
“I thought you had to work today,” Kyle said.
“No,” Aleecia said. “I specifically said . . . ”
“Hey,” Kyle interrupted her. “Do you want something to drink?”
“Okay?” Aleecia said, uncertain.
Kyle took her hand and led her toward a crowd of people who were milling around a picnic table that was littered with beer cans and plastic cups.
“Hey, T.J.!” Kyle called out. “Get me a bottle out of the cooler.”
Kyle twisted the top off of a frosty bottle and offered it to Aleecia.
“What is it?” she said.
“Taste it and see if you like it,” Kyle said.
Aleecia took a sip. It tasted sweet. She took another sip. “It’s good,” she said.
“You look nice,” Kyle said.
“Do you like my dress?” Aleecia asked.
“That dress was made for you,” Kyle said as he slipped his arm around her waist.
Aleecia was surprised at how much she enjoyed the sensation. Her heart exploded like a swarm of plovers over the pounding surf. He was holding her tight and she felt very small next to him, excited, but also scared. Kyle leaned his face down close and Aleecia put her hands on his shoulders, pushing him away.
“There are people watching us,” she said.
“Let’s go to my car,” Kyle said. She felt the eyes of the crowd on her as he took her hand and led her toward the parking lot. She banked every jealous look, her self-worth growing with each one. He opened the passenger door for her and then walked around to the driver’s side.
“Are we going someplace?” Aleecia asked.
“To the moon,” Kyle said.
Aleecia giggled. She had never been kissed before and she wasn’t sure where to put her hands. He seemed to engulf her entire soul in his mouth; his lips were so huge and billowy. He was kissing her with such a hunger it took her breath away. He held her face in his hands with such urgent joy, she was sure that no one had ever been kissed better than this. Being kissed like this, it was better than Christmas Day, her birthday, and soloing with the church choir all rolled into one.
After he had been kissing her for what seemed like forever, she began to wonder if he was ever going to stop. Aleecia sat up. “This was really nice, but I need to go,” she said. “I should find Dawn.”
“I can drive you home,” Kyle said.
“Oh,” Aleecia said. She didn’t want her friends to think that she had abandoned them. But she wanted to hold onto this feeling for as long as possible. “Sure,” she said at last. “That would be great.”
Aleecia’s mind raced as Kyle put the car into gear and steered deftly with one hand out of the lot and onto the highway. Is he my boyfriend? she wondered. The captain of the football team! The thought of it gave her goose bumps. She imagined holding hands in the hallway at school, kissing under the stadium bleachers.
“You’re awfully quiet,” Kyle said.
Aleecia was paralyzed with shyness. She realized she had no idea what to say. How did I get here? One minute I was checking him out in Big Lots and the next thing I am kissing him in his car. How does this work? Does he really like me? Or does he just think I’m easy? She suddenly regretted wearing the halter dress. She should have worn her cut-offs.
Kyle rested his hand, palm up, in her lap. “Hey,” he said. “I really like you.”
Aleecia rested her hand lightly in his and they drove the rest of the way in silence.
FOUR
Kyle
* * *
ON SUNDAY MORNING, KYLE SLEPT LATE AND THEN LAY in his bed for a while, scanning his messages on his phone.
Steve texted, What time r u picking us up for the bbq?
Kyle replied, Party starts at 4. You want to get there around 4:30 or 5?
Pick us up at 4:30
Cool
“Where are you going?” his mother screamed as the screen door slammed. “I didn’t say you could go out. Who is going to watch these babies?”
“Bye, Mama,” Kyle yelled over his shoulder.
He jumped into his battered Cavalier and spun out of the gravel driveway.
“Stay home with your babies, bitch,” Kyle said, bitterly into the rear view mirror. He cranked up WJFP on the radio and drove fast down Route 1, slowing instinctively for the speed trap across from the FPL substation. As he rolled by in what felt like slow motion, he nodded in the direction of the police cruiser that was idling in the parking lot. A few more miles down the road, he pulled up in front of Steve’s house. Steve was the running back on the football team and Kyle’s closest friend. Kyle honked the horn and three boys came spilling out of the front door and piled into Kyle’s car, dissing each other loudly.
“Pop the trunk!” Steve yelled. He was carrying a cooler.
Kyle got out to open the trunk. “You boys started the party without me?” he asked with a broad smile.
“We raided my mom’s liquor cabinet,” Steve said. “She won’t notice that we watered the vodka down.”
“You got anything for me?” Kyle asked.
Steve handed him a flask and Kyle took a deep gulp.
“Bogart!” one of the boys in the back seat yelled.
“Hey!” Kyle yelled back. “You don’t need to ride in my car. I can drop you at the gas station on the corner. It’s only mile or so to walk to the beach.”
Kyle pulled into the beach parking lot and walked around to open the trunk.
“I got it,” Steve said and lifted the cooler onto his shoulder.
They joined the rest of the football team, who had gathered around a picnic table under an oak tree. The table was laden with buckets of KFC and six-packs of Mountain Dew.
Cars pulled into the lot in a steady stream as the park filled with kids spreading out blankets, coolers, and portable music players.
An offshore breeze kicked up and lessened the heat of the day.
Kyle and Steve tossed a football back and forth and a bunch of the other players joined them in a game of two-hand touch.
Kyle was just exiting the park restroom when he saw Aleecia jump out of the pickup. The breeze blew her hair in her face and whipped her dress up to show a little bit of panty.
“Damn, I’d tap that.” Kyle heard Steve’s voice behind him.
“Watch it,” Kyle said, “Aleecia is a nice girl.”
“You don’t even know her,” Steve protested.
“We’ve met,” Kyle said. He walked toward her, calling out,“ Yo.”
She looked happy to see him.
“I wasn’t sure you were coming,” Kyle said. “Want to take a walk on the beach?”
Kyle took her hand and led her down toward the water. The sun was behind them and the air was cool.
Kyle put his arm around Aleecia’s shoulder. He could feel the goose bumps on her arm. “Are you cold?”
“I should have brought a sweater,” Aleecia said.
“Do you want to go sit in my car?” Kyle said.
“Sure,” she said.
Kyle took her hand and led her back to the parking lot. He opened the passenger door for her and then walked around to the driver’s side.
“Are we going someplace?” Aleecia asked.
“It’s just warmer in here,” Kyle said. He pulled her closer to him. “You look really pretty.”
“Do you like my dress?” Aleecia asked.
“I do,” Kyle said. “Do you want something to drink?” He pulled the flask out from under the seat.
“What is it?” she asked.
“Taste it and see if you like it,” Kyle said.
Aleecia took a sip. “It’s good,” she said.
“I bet it doesn’t taste any better than you,” Kyle said. “Can I kiss you?”
Aleecia didn’t reply so he leaned in and inhaled her. Her skin is so soft, he thought. Her is hair so silky; she smells like a fragrant oasis. I want her to carry me far away—to someplace that doesn’t smell like piss and rotten garbage. A place where there are no scared and hungry kids clinging to me like they are drowning and I am their life raft, I am their only hope. I want to go to a place where we can love each other and build a bulwark together; protection from the poverty and violence that wants to tear me down. What is it that she tastes like? She tastes like hope.
He was just starting to lose himself in the fantasy when she suddenly sat upright.
“This was really nice, but I need to go,” she said. “I should find Dawn.”
Really? You need to find Dawn? Dawn can take care of herself. Don’t leave me. I need you. You are my life raft.
“I can drive you home,” Kyle said. He rested his hand, palm up, in her lap. “Hey,” he said. “I really like you.”
Aleecia rested her hand lightly in his and they drove the rest of the way in silence.
Kyle pulled up in front of Aleecia’s house.
“Thank you,” Aleecia said. “I had a nice time.”
“See you tomorrow?” Kyle asked.
“At school?” Aleecia asked. “Sure.”
“Maybe after school?’ Kyle said. “I’m done with practice around seven.”
“You have football practice in May?” Aleecia asked.
“Spring practice,” Kyle said. “Coach asked me to assist. ”
“I work on Mondays,” Aleecia said.
This is going to be difficult. He was frustrated. “Okay, you tell me when,” Kyle said, and gave her his cell number.
“Would you like to come to church next Sunday?” Aleecia said.
“Church?” Kyle chuckled. I’ve never dated anyone who went to church! This is going to be awkward, he thought.
“I sing in the choir, I mean,” Aleecia said.
“I’d like that,” Kyle said, relieved. “To hear you sing.”
FIVE
Aleecia
* * *
“MOM, I’M HOME,” ALEECIA CALLED OUT. HER SKIN tingled with the lingering memory of sand and salt spray from the ocean. She longed for the embrace of Kyle’s arms, his musky smell. This has been the best day of my life, she thought. I never want this feeling to end!
Her mom came into the living room, a bottle of beer in her hand, still wearing her home aid uniform.
“You won’t believe my day,” her mother said. “Mrs. Flanagan called the cops on me again today. She claimed that I was stealing from her. I had to explain to the officer that I was her home aid. My supervisor had to come down on her day off to intervene. What a shit show.”
She took a sip from her bottle and looked hard at Aleecia.
“Where have you been? What is that you are wearing?” her mother asked.
“This is Gina’s dress. I went to a party on the beach. There were a bunch of kids from school.”
“You went to the beach in that?”
“Gina said I looked beautiful,” Aleecia said.
“You look cheap,” her mother said. “That dress is too tight—you look like a stuffed sausage.”
“Stuffed sausage? Mom!” Aleecia cried. She looked at her reflection in the hall mirror and her face fell. The wind had blown her hair into knots; her mascara had formed raccoon rings under her eyes, and her dress was bunched up around her too-thick waist. What does Kyle see in me?
“Was there a boy involved?” her mother asked.
“Kyle is the captain of the football team,” Aleecia said. “He invited me.”
“This boy, Kyle?” she said. “He didn’t touch you.”
“Touch me?” Aleecia said.
“Aleecia, baby,” her mother said. “You’re fifteen. You’re too young to start running around with boys. I’m going to have a word with Gina. Dressing you up like a slut and sending you out to the beach. How old is this boy?”
“Kyle is a senior,” Aleecia said.
“He’s too old for you,” her mother said.
“I don’t understand,” Aleecia said.
“Exactly,” her mother said. “You don’t understand. You’re too young for this. You need to stay in school. You’re going to college. I don’t want you ending up like me—single mom, working for an hourly wage, scraping by. I want a better life for you. Go wash that makeup off of your face. Did you do your homework?”
“Yes, Mama,” Aleecia said.
Aleecia changed into a T-shirt and pajama bottoms, tied back her hair, and scrubbed her face. She gazed at her reflection in the mirror and thought about how it felt when Kyle kissed her. That was the happiest I’ve ever been, she said to herself in the mirror.
Aleecia climbed into bed and pulled out her diary.
Dear Diary,
Today was the best day ever. Kyle saw me the minute I got to the beach and never left my side. Everyone was watching us. Me! With the captain of the football team! Please, God, let this be real. Let him be my boyfriend. My first boyfriend. That feeling when he held me in his arms and swallowed me in his kiss—such a feeling of love and passion and anticipation—now I know. This is the point of everything.
Kyle
After Kyle dropped Aleecia at home, he drove back to the park to find Steve and the others. They had built a roaring bonfire on the beach that he could see from a mile away. The park was mostly deserted and trash was strewn everywhere. Taking sips from the flask, he made his way over to the fire pit. He recognized Steve and the rest of the posse along with Jordan and Janelle and a few of the other cheerleaders.
“Hey, Romeo!” Steve called out. “Where’s Cinderella?”
“Who’s Cinderella?” Janelle asked.
“Some freshman he was hitting on,” Jordan said. “I guess she had to be home before dark.” The girls giggled.
Janelle shot Kyle a jealous look. “Seriously, Kyle. You’re dating a child?” she taunted.
Ignoring them, Kyle plopped down on the cold sand next to Steve and just as he did, his phone vibrated in his pocket. He pul
led it out, hoping to see Aleecia’s number. But the caller ID read “Lucifer,” his pet name for his mother. He sighed deeply as he answered, “What is it?”
“Where are you?” his mother sounded drunk. “I’ve been calling you for hours.”
“No, Ma,” Kyle said. “There are no calls from you. You must have been calling somebody else.”
“I need you to come home,” she said. “Dwayne is hungry.”
“So feed him.” Kyle could hear Crystal crying in the background. “What’s wrong with the baby?”
“I don’t have any food in the house,” she said. “Pick up some KFC for the kids. When are you coming home?”
“I’ll be there,” Kyle said and hung up.
“Gotta go,” Kyle said to Steve. “Anybody need a ride?”
“No, thanks man,” Steve said.
Kyle knew Aleecia wouldn’t be working, so he swung by the Big Lots to pick up formula, hot dogs, cereal, milk and some frozen mac and cheese, putting them all on the SNAP card.
When he got home, the house was dark. He could make out his mother’s silhouette on the couch.
“FPL cut us off again?” Kyle asked.
“What did you bring me, baby?” his mom asked.
“Just some food for the kids,” he said. In the kitchen, he found a candle and held it to the gas burner on the stove to light it. He boiled some water and went outside to retrieve the spent cooler from his trunk. There was still some ice left so he plunged the milk carton in and closed the lid tight.
Kyle woke up Crystal to change her and give her a bottle. He put a plate of mac and cheese and hot dogs drenched in ketchup on a tray and carried it into Dwayne.
“Hey, buddy,” Kyle said. “Are you hungry?”
Dwayne sat up on his bed, rubbing his eyes. “KFC?”
“Even better,” Kyle said and set the tray down on the floor.
Kyle sat on the floor and scooped Dwayne into his lap. He felt guilty for running off that morning, escaping to the beach to hang with his friends and hook up with Aleecia. Dwayne scarfed down the food as Kyle cuddled him, wishing it were Aleecia in his arms.
