by Debra Webb
“Behave yourself now,” the tall one said as he opened the door. “We’ll be waiting right outside.”
Seth smiled at him, and every ounce of assurance drained from the man’s expression. Maybe he really was a monster. It definitely had its advantages.
Inside the room he hesitated a moment before turning to face his visitor. The subtle scent of her flowery perfume reminded him of her home. Her room had smelled that way. He hadn’t been able to put the scent out of his mind the past few weeks.
“It’s good to see you,” she said, hoping to garner his attention.
He executed a slow, deliberate 180-degree turn, more to control his reaction than to intimidate her. He wasn’t sure how he would respond to her presence. He was unsure of a lot of things lately. He’d been ready to die to hurt her, hadn’t he? His brow creased into a frown. He didn’t know anymore.
Forcing the disturbing thoughts away, his gaze settled on her. It felt strange to look at her and not feel the hatred that had been his constant companion for so long. He wasn’t sure where it had gone. It was simply gone. Maybe it was the medication they sneaked into his food. He was reasonably certain that’s what they were doing since he refused to take it. He’d eventually had to eat. They had known he would. Which provided the opportunity they needed.
She sat stiffly at the table provided. The bland room hadn’t been designed for comfort. Only one barred window. A table with four chairs. Nothing else. All white, no pictures on the walls, no rug on the floor, plain old commercial-grade tan tile.
But she was anything but bland. She wore a pink suit that looked tailored for her. Her dark hair was up in its usual smooth bun. Her makeup, what little she wore, was applied expertly. She was a woman of means who wore her position in society proudly.
She was too strong to give up on him…or too stubborn. Seth hadn’t decided which yet.
He approached the table and sat down, his scrutiny continuing as he observed her every response to his movements. She wasn’t afraid…resigned maybe, but definitely not afraid. She looked troubled and he knew he was the reason.
“I want to know more about Tasha,” he said, careful to keep the alien emotions he’d experienced of late out of his tone.
Victoria nodded. “She’s fine. In fact, she’s here to see you.”
Anticipation surged through him, but he suppressed the urgency that welled up in his chest. “She wants to see me?”
“Yes. She’s wanted to see you from the moment they released her from the hospital, but the doctors wouldn’t allow you visitors until now.”
He didn’t like those damned doctors.
“I’d like to see her now.” Anything Victoria Colby had to say to him could wait. He wanted to see Tasha. His heart kicked into a faster rhythm as his mind recalled the moments they had shared together. He tried to control how the memories affected him, but he couldn’t manage the feat anymore.
“I’d like to spend a few moments with you first,” Victoria said, dragging his attention back to her.
He had endured endless beatings and worse in the past to earn the right to a meal or a few hours’ sleep, he supposed he could endure a few minutes of her company. Though he couldn’t understand why she would want to see him. He’d spent a great deal of time thinking about killing her. She was well aware of that. And still she came to see him.
“The doctors have told me that you’ve experienced a few breakthrough memories about your life before…”
Before Leberman, she didn’t say. He didn’t like thinking about Leberman. “That’s right.” He resisted the urge to tap his foot as his agitation began to build. There was something about her demeanor now that made him uneasy. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it…but something wasn’t right.
“You must know, then, that your father and I loved you very much. We were a happy family.”
The tears he expected to see in her eyes weren’t there, just a dullness that made him curious to know what was going on inside her head.
“What do you want me to say to that?” The question came out bluntly. What did she expect from him? A sudden return to life the way it was before? Was he supposed to hug her and tell her that he loved her? He didn’t know how to love. Leberman had made sure of that. Hell, he’d never even missed another human until Tasha.
Victoria looked away for a moment, then settled her gaze back on his. “I don’t know what I expect you to say,” she admitted, her fingers clasping the clutch purse she carried even tighter. “This is difficult for both of us.”
She was upset. The doctors would be watching and analyzing his ability to interact with her. Shit. He’d never get out of here if he didn’t do better. Did it matter? He thought of Tasha and decided it did.
“The photo albums have been useful,” he offered, hoping to placate her.
Her whole expression seemed to brighten at his words. The reaction confused him. Increased that uneasiness twisting inside him.
“I’ve done a lot of thinking since I learned that you were still alive,” she said quietly. “And I’ve decided that you’re right.”
His instincts went on alert.
“If I had been a better mother I would have found you before your father came home that day. Then you wouldn’t have slipped through the gate and hidden in the forest. I would have found you…before.”
The doctors had told her the things he’d remembered. She had been playing with him in the backyard. She’d gone inside to answer the phone and he’d hidden in the bushes near the entry gate to the lake house property. The security measures had been to protect him from the water…and other things he’d been too young to understand. While she was looking for him in the backyard his father had come home. He’d sneaked out as the gate closed behind his father’s car. He’d thought it would be so funny to hide in the woods. He and his mother had taken walks there before, he wasn’t afraid.
But night had come too fast for her to find him. Then he’d gotten scared…had tried to find his way out…but he’d found Leberman instead. Leberman had had someone watching the house for just that moment. Under hypnosis, Seth had remembered another man but couldn’t identify him.
“I should have watched you more carefully. I didn’t protect you…it was my fault.” She looked into his eyes, and the pain he saw there was hard to look at. “All of this was my fault. You’re right to hate me. I should have protected you.”
His apprehension escalated, making him increasingly uncomfortable. She didn’t seem to want answers…she just wanted to talk…to say the words.
“I would have gladly traded places with you if I could have found you. But he was too elusive…too smart for me, so I failed. Now the decision is yours. Where do you want this to go, or do you want it to end here and now? I need to know how you feel. If you still wish me dead. I, for one, can’t live another day with this guilt. With the not knowing.”
He thought of the strong woman he’d watched for months, waiting until the time came. Leberman had wanted him to kill her as well as Lucas Camp. He’d planned for it from day one. But Seth hadn’t been able to follow through…he’d decided to simply destroy her from the inside out. To make her suffer as he had. At least, he thought that’s what he’d decided. She would see him die and that would be worse than death.
As he stared into her dull, hollow eyes, he knew he had accomplished that goal.
Oddly, it gave him no satisfaction.
All he’d ever seen of Victoria Colby was her strength…her stoicism no matter what was thrown her way. Where was that woman now?
“I’ve decided to give you the opportunity to have your vengeance.”
He stilled, his instincts rushing to a higher state of alert.
“You realize, of course,” she went on, “that they’re watching us, so there won’t be time for second thoughts or deliberation. But I
have to know that I’ve done everything within my power to make the past up to you. If taking my life will give you even one moment’s peace, I’ll gladly surrender it.”
Before he could string together a response, she reached into her purse and withdrew a small-caliber handgun. A .32. She placed it on the table in front of him and said, “The decision is yours.”
He stared at the gun for about three seconds then looked directly at her. She was dead serious. Willing to do anything to give him peace, even if only for one fleeting moment. Could anyone really be that selfless? Could he possibly mean that much to her? His gaze dropped to the weapon once more. For his whole life a weapon had been the one thing he could rely on. The one thing he trusted. But now, staring at the cold, black steel, he felt nothing. No desire. No urgency.
He heard the scuffle of running feet in the corridor outside.
“They’re coming,” she warned.
He didn’t know how the hell she’d gotten in this place with that weapon, but he had to hand it to her, she didn’t make idle boasts. She was willing to die for him.
Two guards rushed into the room. He didn’t move. Knew if he did that he’d get an injection that would put him out for about six hours. Like all his lessons, he’d learned that one the hard way.
The .32 was snatched off the table by one of the guards. “Mrs. Colby, we’ll have to ask you to come with us now.”
She looked confused…startled.
They needed more time.
Seth glared up at the burly guard and said, “We’re not finished yet.”
If the widening of the man’s eyes was any indication, he didn’t want to argue. “I’ll need your purse,” he said to Victoria. She handed it over. The guard glanced at Seth. “We’ll be right outside with your orderlies.”
Seth said nothing. There was no need.
For a couple of minutes after the guards left, he and Victoria simply looked at each other. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say and he imagined she felt the same way.
But there was one thing he had to know. “Did you have that much faith in those few years we spent together to believe that I wouldn’t take you up on your offer?”
She smiled sadly. “Yes, I did. But I had to know for sure.”
He shook his head. There she was. The superwoman he’d watched from a distance. The woman who visited him every single day through the memories her photo albums evoked.
He exhaled a mighty breath. “I guess we have a long ways to go in a lot of respects.”
“Does that mean we have a truce?” she asked, that hope springing to life in her eyes once more.
He stared at his bound hands for a moment and tried to think above all the lies and ugliness he’d been force-fed all those years. “Yeah.” He met her gaze once more. “I guess it does.”
She stood, seemingly satisfied. “I’ve taken enough of your time. I’ll send in Tasha.”
He wasn’t sure he could let her go without saying more, but he wasn’t even sure what he needed to say. “Wait.” He grappled for the right words.
When she hesitated and turned back to him, he stood, towered over her by nearly a foot. But she didn’t look intimidated, she just looked hopeful. That undying hope affected something in his chest. “I don’t know where things will go from here. I don’t know how to be what you probably want me to be.” She shouldn’t get her hopes up. He might never be able to live up to her expectations.
A tremulous smile peeked past the emotions cluttering her face. “For the record, I only want you to be happy.” She laid her hand against his arm, a gesture of comfort. Remarkably, he didn’t feel compelled to flinch. “I’ll be back tomorrow.”
He nodded, then watched her go.
His heart started to beat faster at the thought of seeing Tasha. He was so damned thankful that she was here.
The orderly came in, looking annoyed. Seth tensed. Were they taking him back now? Had someone decided he wasn’t allowed to see Tasha?
“I’m going to let your hands loose,” the orderly said gruffly, “but if you give us any trouble, they’ll go back on. Got it?”
Seth nodded, relieved that they weren’t taking him away. Victoria had to be behind this. She must have insisted they release his restraints. He could see her making that happen. Something like respect nudged at him. It was going to take time to get used to all these unfamiliar feelings.
When the orderly had exited the room, the door opened again. Tasha stepped inside. She looked great. But a whole month had passed. Her injury had obviously healed.
He started to shake, and he didn’t understand the reaction…couldn’t stop it. He had to look away. Didn’t want her to see the weakness.
She moved in close to him, took his trembling hand. “Hey.”
Despite the way his body shook and his gut clenched, he had to look at her, had to hold her. He pulled her into his arms, and his breath caught at the feel of her.
“They wouldn’t tell me what I wanted to know,” he managed to say without his voice quavering. “Wouldn’t let me see you.”
“It’s okay,” she murmured as she held him tight in her arms. “Everything’s okay now.”
They held each other that way for a long time. He couldn’t say for sure just how long.
She finally pulled back far enough to press a soft kiss to his lips. “It’s good to see you. I’ve missed you.”
He cupped her face in his hands and tried to think of how to tell her what he was feeling but couldn’t find the words. “It’s good to see you,” he echoed.
“Victoria says they’re moving you to a different room now. You’ll be able to have visitors every day.”
He liked watching her lips move…liked the way she smelled. He wanted to taste her. “Will you come every day?”
She smiled and nodded. “If you want me to.”
He tasted her lips and she kissed him back. “Yes,” he whispered between kisses. “I want you to.”
She kissed him again and he shivered. He wondered vaguely if the guards would come running if he stripped off her clothes and took her right here on the table.
Maybe he’d just see.
EPILOGUE
“I’ll be ready in a moment!” Victoria called from the bedroom of their penthouse suite.
Lucas loosened his bow tie and pulled it free of his neck. The wedding was behind them. The champagne was on ice. And Victoria was getting “comfortable.” He still shuddered when he thought of her taking that weapon into that clinic, but she’d been determined to do something to break the ice between her and her son. When Lucas had learned about her bold move he’d gone ballistic. But she’d insisted that she’d known going in how it would end.
He opened the French doors and stepped out onto the grand balcony. All the suites on the empress deck had balconies and he’d wanted the best for their honeymoon. The crisp December breeze sent a chill across his skin, but the knowledge that the woman in the other room was now his lawful wife kept him plenty warm.
If he squinted he could just make out the wedding party still waving from the pier as the ship moved farther and farther from shore. Every single member of the Colby Agency was there, as were a number of his Specialists.
A nice long cruise was in order.
He and Victoria deserved it.
Ian and Simon could take care of things at the agency.
Director Casey had Mission Recovery under control.
And Tasha would keep Jim company.
He still considered himself Seth, the name Leberman had given him long ago. He’d never had a social security number or driver’s license. Leberman had provided the essentials he’d wanted him to possess to go along with any number of aliases as necessary. For all intents and purposes, the persona Seth had never existed on paper or in any other “legit
imate” capacity. He tolerated Victoria’s constant use of the name that had belonged to the boy he once was. He had a long way to go. The doctors weren’t sure he would fully recover his early memories, but he would learn to cope with his newly developing emotions. His sessions had gone well enough that he was allowed to leave the clinic for weekends. All of which were spent with Tasha, except for Sunday brunch with Victoria, of course.
All in all, Lucas felt good about the way things had worked out. Leberman was dead, the evil bastard, and Victoria had her son back, for the most part anyway.
Tasha had given Lucas notice that she’d decided to join the Colby Agency rather than his team. Well, he couldn’t fault her there. She wanted to be close to Jim. A job in research at the firm would keep her out of harm’s way, as well. Making a life with Jim was going to take a lot of patience and understanding. Tasha was the right woman.
His cell phone rang, and Lucas fished it from his jacket pocket. He’d taken care to mute it during the service or risk facing Victoria’s, as well as the minister’s, wrath.
He smiled at the thought as he flipped open his phone. Victoria Colby-Camp. It had a hell of a nice ring to it.
“Camp,” he said by way of greeting.
“I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”
Director Casey. “Not yet,” Lucas warned. He glanced back into the room to see if Victoria had appeared.
“There might not be a better time for us to talk later.”
“Now is fine,” Lucas insisted. He knew his director wouldn’t call unless it was important.
“I spoke with the doctor at the clinic this morning. Since they started hypnosis there hasn’t been much real progress. According to his conclusions, Jim is still resisting, subconsciously he believes.”
Lucas rubbed his forehead and considered the ramifications of that information. He’d asked Casey to personally look into the situation with Victoria’s son since he couldn’t do so without her knowledge. No one at the Colby Agency could know about his growing suspicions. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Victoria, she simply had enough on her plate right now with sorting out the fledgling relationship with her son. She didn’t need this added worry. But he was certain that there was, at the very least, someone in the agency who’d leaked information, quite possibly without realizing it. Leberman had known too much. According to Tasha, he had known who she was from the beginning. He’d known the security codes to both Victoria’s properties. The very thought of a mole made him extremely nervous. Lucas had to be certain.
