Farren sighed and laid the baby back down, following Gramma into the kitchen.
“Can I ask you something?”
She could smell dinner cooking on the stove, homemade chicken and dumplings, and the smell was comforting.
“Of course, honey. You can always ask me anything. What's on your mind?”
Gramma grabbed two bowls from an upper cabinet and scooped some of the chicken and dumplings into each. She pulled spoons from a drawer, placed a bowl in front of Farren, and sat in her seat across with a bowl of her own.
“Did your relationship with Papa change after you had my dad?” she asked, focusing on the steaming bowl in front of her instead of Gramma’s eyes that were fixed directly on her.
Gramma gave a knowing nod. “Everything changed when I had your dad. I wasn't the same person I had been before. My priorities were different, but men were a whole different breed back then. James was a responsible young man, a military man in the Navy. He worked and took care of the bills, and I stayed home to raise your dad.”
“How did you go from being a girlfriend... or in your case a wife, to being a mother? How did you keep the spark alive?” Farren asked.
“Oh, I suppose we found our ways. You just have to find a way to change your mindset when the time is right. You fill so much more than just one role. You're a smart, beautiful, talented, young woman, and so far have made a wonderful mother.”
Gramma took a bite from her soup as Farren let her words sink in.
“I guess it's hard to get in the right mindset when I'm exhausted all the time, and I'm constantly on alert for the sound of crying. I swear, Rogan could sleep through a tornado, but if I even think I hear a whimper, I spring up out of bed.”
She took a few bites, feeling the weariness deep in her bones as Gramma chuckled.
“Women are just hard-wired that way. Cut him a little slack, honey. This won't last forever, and you'll eventually miss these days when Harley was this little and relied on you so much for everything.”
Farren was quiet for a while, letting the comfort food work its magic. After a few minutes of silence, she set her spoon down. She had another question but knew it would be awkward.
“Gramma, what about... the attraction? I still have this baby weight, and I'm so tired, I know I just look haggard all the time, but I just don't have the energy to do anything about it. Plus, I'm even afraid to take too long in the shower because I might miss Harley crying, but I'm afraid that Rogan sees me and I disgust him. I worry that something better will come along and he'll lose interest in me.”
It was hard to say the words, but it was a genuine fear, and she knew if anyone could give her honest, sage advice, it was Gramma.
“Farren, all this time and you still don't let this sink in. Have some faith in people. But more than that, have some faith in yourself. That man loves you for a lot more than just your looks. I've seen him in the room with you. He's a protector. He's going to protect what's his.”
Gramma sounded so sure. Farren felt a little better, but she still felt some doubt. Harley was his, but what about her? And even if he saw her as his, did he see himself as hers?
When Harley began crying from the living room a few feet away, Farren got up to tend to him. It was his dirty diaper cry, and she figured she was done with her dinner, anyway.
Gramma took care of her bowl, and she was just about to sit down in her recliner as Farren came walking back into the living room from changing him in the bedroom when a heavy knock came pounding on the apartment door.
An electric current spread through the room as Harley startled. Farren clung him tighter into her chest as her eyes met Gramma's.
Farren stood by the sofa as Gramma walked to the door and looked through the peephole. Her eyes were wide when she turned around to look back at Farren. Farren’s panic began welling inside her as they stood looking at each other for several seconds, and she moved her hand up to cup the back of Harley's head.
Gramma turned and reached for the doorknob. With a twist and a click, the door opened, revealing the most unexpected of guests standing on the other side.
Farren gasped. “Dad?”
SEVEN
Pound, pound, pound. The heavy bag swayed from swift left and right jabs as Rogan spent the time alone in the apartment in his home gym. Sweat rolled down his neck and drenched his tight, white tank top. Droplets flung in each direction, leaving dark spots on the mat beneath him that protected the floor.
It felt good to release all the pent up energy he had inside him like this. Boxing had at one point in his life been a sport. Now, on days like this, it was his sanity.
Ever since he’d fired Dallas Evans, his former Head of Marketing and little brother to the ghost that haunted his nightmares, things had been easier and harder at the same time. He’d always given Dallas free reign to run the marketing department as he’d liked, not because Dallas was all that good at it, but because the less he interacted with the rat bastard, the better.
Now, he had Edith fucking Underwood to worry about, and that bitch was good. Really good, and he didn’t just mean at marketing. She was skilled and persistent at getting what she wanted, which was part of what made her the best of the best at her job and a no-brainer of a hire selection.
The trouble was, she had been giving him some not-so-subtle hints that she was interested in a benefits package involving him and extracurricular activities of a sexual nature.
The old Rogan Rayner would have pounded that pussy so fucking hard by now, she’d be glued to him, hungry for more.
Now, he had Farren and their life together to think about, and meaningless sex had a much lesser appeal to him than it had even a year ago. On a primal level, sure, he may have had a cock twitch or two at Edith’s expense, and now, she wanted him to go on this business trip with her out of town, just the two of them. He could tell by the provocative gleam in her eyes that she was hoping it would be her opportunity to get him alone to see how far he would let her go.
He had plans of his own for this trip. That was what really had him so strung out today and in need of pounding the fuck out of that bag. If he went through with it, it would change everything between him and Farren once she found out. Was he making the right choice?
He let up when he heard the door to his condo open and heard Harley’s soft coos as Farren walked in. It was earlier than he had expected them home that night, since she said she was going to visit with her Gramma after work.
He pulled the damp tank top over his head and used it to wipe the droplets of sweat from his brow and neck. He tossed it on a weight bench before walking out to meet her.
The moment she came into view, he could tell something was wrong.
“What happened?” he asked, concerned with an angry tinge.
She didn’t answer right away but instead walked toward Harley’s room to lay him in his crib.
He followed behind her. “Farren, talk to me. What’s going on?” he ordered.
She took her time laying Harley down with gentle hands. She caressed his face and waited a few seconds to make sure he was comfortable before she turned to walk across the hall to their bedroom.
Again, Rogan followed her. When she made a beeline for her dresser to gather a change of clothes for after a shower, he moved in front of her and grabbed her by the arms.
“Farren, look at me.” He waited until she complied, dipping his head to catch her eyes. “What is it?”
“I was just at Gramma’s when…” she began, but paused with her teeth scraping her bottom lip.
“When...?” he said, urging her to continue. His patience was growing thin, knowing something was up, and he couldn’t do anything about it until he knew what it was.
“My dad showed up.”
It was all she had to say.
Farren hadn’t spoken a lot about her dad, but there hadn’t been a lot to say about him. He had left when she was really young, and she hadn’t heard from or seen him since. He could only
imagine what kind of shock it would have been to see him show up at her Gramma’s today.
His hands that had been gripping her arms loosened, and he snaked his arms around her, pulling her in close to him. He could feel her relax the slightest amount within his embrace, and she wrapped her arms around his waist in return, laying her head against his chest.
“You want to talk about it?” he asked through her thick, dark-brown hair.
She simply shook her head no but stood there letting him hold her for a while. Finally, she stirred, and he looked down to see what she might say.
“Rogan?” she asked, still clasping her arms around him.
“Yes, baby?” he responded.
“You were just working out, weren’t you?” she asked.
He stiffened and pulled back from her with his arms still locked tightly around her. “Yeah, why?”
“Because you’re all sweaty!” she said, feigning a look of disgust that she was only able to hold for a few seconds before she broke out into a chuckle.
His arms unlocked from around her, and he bent down to pick her up. She shrieked in surprise and wrapped her arms around his neck to hold onto him.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“I believe you were just on your way to take a shower, were you not, Miss Fields?” he said in his most professional voice.
“I was…” she said with skepticism.
“So was I.”
EIGHT
Pushing a baby stroller through the crowded halls of the Houston Galleria that Sunday, Farren spotted Shea thumbing through a discount clothing rack in front of the Lucky Brand Jeans store.
“There’s your Auntie Shea!” Farren sang in her high-pitched, baby-talk voice as she wheeled Harley closer.
Shea turned and saw them. She abandoned the clothes and met them, bending down first to greet Harley with a gentle cheek pinch, coaxing a smile from him before acknowledging mama. She pulled Farren in for a warm, engulfing hug.
“Shea, it’s so good to see you,” Farren said over Shea’s shoulder.
They started toward the food court to grab lunch at White Oak Kitchen.
“How is Devin?” Farren asked, getting the best-friend-catch-up conversation started.
Shea rolled her eyes and scoffed. “Don’t ask. I’m totally pissed at him right now for forgetting our two-year anniversary.”
“Two years? I didn’t know you two have been together that long!” Farren said in surprise as the line moved forward for them to place their order at the bar.
“We haven’t,” Shea admitted, “but we met two years ago last Saturday. You’d think he would remember the day he met the best thing that’s ever happened to him.”
Shea’s face was deadpan for a few seconds as Farren stood watching her with a ‘you’re kidding me, right?’ face. Then, Shea’s serious expression melted into a devious grin. “I know. I’m being ridiculous.”
It was their turn in line, so they ordered their food and went to grab a table just outside the doors of the crowded restaurant. Farren parked Harley’s stroller next to the table and checked that all was well with him before settling in her chair across from Shea, and a waitress came out with salads and bowls of soup to set in front of them both.
“So what’s the real story?” Farren asked. “What’s really got you upset?”
Shea finished chewing a bite of salad before responding with a sigh. “I don’t know. We’ve been together for a year and a half now, and I guess I’m just wondering what the next step is, or when.”
Farren nodded with full understanding. “What do you want the next step to be?”
“I don’t know. I want the jerk to propose. But I don’t want to tell him I want him to propose because then I’ll never know if he did it because he wanted to or because I wanted him to.”
“Geez, Shea, why don’t you do what any normal girl would do and leave a bunch of bridal magazines lying around or something?”
Shea shook her head like the idea was absurd.
“Enough about me, what about you? How are things with Mr. Dark and Dirty?” Shea teased, waggling her eyebrows.
“Dark and Dirty?” Farren asked with a laugh.
“Uh, yeah! Dark as in, the man is kind of scary-intense sometimes, in a totally hot, Alpha dog kind of way,” Shea explained.
Farren couldn’t disagree there. “And Dirty?”
“Get your mind in the gutter, Fair Child. That man has kinky bastard written all over him,” Shea said, then took a drink of her soda through the straw without breaking eye contact.
A smile broke through on Farren’s face, and a faint blush tinted her cheeks.
“Yeah, well, aside from a couple times in the last week, things have been a little… slow… in the bedroom department,” Farren admitted, looking down at her soup.
“You just had a baby, though. That’s pretty normal, right? Sounds like things are warming up to me.”
Farren had no reply.
Shea leaned forward in her seat, moving in closer to Farren. “What are you not telling me?”
Farren sat her salad fork down on the table, having lost her appetite.
“There’s a woman at work, Edith. I’ve suspected for a while now that she has a thing for him, but I overheard her the other day confirming it to another employee.”
The worried look on Farren’s face did nothing to portray the full extent of anxiety she felt in her gut over the issue.
“The bitch! Who is she?”
“She’s the new marketing manager. She’s smart, confident, and gorgeous, of course. Aggressive. Pretty much exactly his type.”
Farren thought back to when she had first met Rogan and had just started working for him. He had gorgeous, sexy women parading in and out all the time.
“I hate her already,” Shea said with the obligatory, enemy of my friend is my enemy best friend support, but making it totally believable.
Farren sighed, appreciative but still at a loss on what to do about it. She knew her insecurities ran deep, and they had mostly nothing to do with the man she shared her heart and her bed with.
“So, my dad showed up at Gramma’s the other day when I was picking up Harley.”
Shea’s eyes went wide and her chin dropped to the floor. “You’re not serious.”
Shea had been around when Farren’s father had disappeared back when they were kids, barely teenagers. She’d been around before that, too, when he’d used Farren as a punching bag when he’d had too much to drink, which was all too often.
If that man had been anything, it was an angry drunk, a non-functioning alcoholic, likely resenting the fact that Farren’s mother had left them both when Farren was still a baby. He’d been an irresponsible guy, forced into responsibility by his own parents who made sure he didn’t drink himself out of it.
When James, Farren’s grandpa, had fallen ill years before he’d passed, it had been a lot to ask of Gramma to tend to her husband’s health and keep her free-spirited son in line, too.
“I’m serious,” Farren replied.
“So how are you feeling about that?” Shea asked, cautious.
Farren blew out a deep breath and rubbed her temples. “I don’t know. I mean, my head tells me not to give him the chance to walk out on me again. What’s he even here for, anyway? You know he probably just wants something… Right?”
She looked to her best friend as though she hoped she might have another perspective to add.
“That’s a tough one, Farr,” Shea admitted. “What is your heart telling you?”
Farren looked over to her precious, sleeping baby.
“I mean, he’s my dad, you know? No matter how awful someone is to you, if you love them, you still hold out hope.”
“Just be careful. You have someone else to think about now,” Shea warned, pointing her soup spoon at Farren to drive her point home.
Farren smiled.
“You’ll make a great mother someday-”
Her sentence trailed
off when her attention was directed to a figure in the distance behind Shea that she couldn’t ignore. It was Edith Underwood walking out of Victoria’s Secret, the lingerie side, with a couple of bags in hand.
“What the hell?” Farren whispered under her breath.
Shea turned to see what Farren was looking at. “What? What is it?”
“Edith Underwood. I just saw her coming out of Victoria’s Secret with two bags of lingerie. Right before her business trip with Rogan tomorrow.”
“Where is she? Want me to go mess her face up a little bit?”
Farren’s attention was directed back to the crazy, cynical girl in front of her. Once again, she wouldn’t have put it past Shea to make good on her over-the-top threats.
She shook her head. “No, this shouldn’t surprise me. Ugh!” she groaned. “I hate this. I’m so confused right now.”
“What are you going to do?” Shea asked, reaching to grasp Farren’s hands from across the table.
Farren thought for a moment. “I’m going to talk to Rogan. I don’t want to tell him not to go, but maybe I can just go with them.”
Shea pulled her hands back and clapped them together. “Yes! And you can leave little Mr. Harley here with me to babysit while you’re gone!” she offered.
Farren laughed. “How about you watch him for me for a few minutes while I run into GameStop to get a new game that just came out?”
“There’s my old friend. I’ve been wondering where you’ve been hiding,” Shea teased. She stood and reached to take Harley out of his stroller. “You go ahead. I’ll just be here loving on this little angel,” she cooed in her sugary-sweet baby voice.
Farren laughed. “Okay, I’ll just be a few minutes.”
She stood from her seat and headed off in the direction of GameStop. When she got there, she made her way to the back of the store where the Overwatch display was. She grabbed her game and made her way back to the front to pay out.
When the cashier noticed her, he smiled. He was tall with the sides of his dark hair trimmed short while the top and back were a bit longer and gelled in a messy array, almost like a wide Mohawk. It was a nice style, one she remembered some of her guy friends in college having.
Boss Unavowed: A Love On the Rocks Romance (The Boss Series Book 2) Page 3
