by Starling,Amy
“...Allie? Tell me what's wrong.”
I pushed him away and fought back tears. What was wrong?
I wished I had a sensible answer to that.
Chapter 9 - Carter
Watching Alicia get ready for bed was a treat and torture both.
“Ugh. I hate getting dressed up.” She kicked off her heels with a sigh. “No wonder I never got into the club scene. Bleached hair, manicured nails, and a fake tan just aren't for me.”
“Then it's a damn good thing you look beautiful just the way you are.”
She studied me in the mirror as I brushed my teeth. I didn't mean to hit on her, but how could I help it?
“I appreciate you trying to flatter me, but I highly doubt I look good with no makeup and dark circles under my eyes.”
She went into the bathroom to change clothes – door shut, sadly – and emerged wearing a tank top and gray cotton shorts.
All right, that did it. She was trying to punish me now. How could I sleep tonight without this woman in my arms?
“Four more days of this,” she murmured, checking the vacation plans on her phone. “Tomorrow, we're visiting my grandparents at their house for dinner. Think you can keep up the husband act?”
“Mmm, I don't know. We still haven't consummated this marriage, if you know what I mean. That'd make it a lot easier for me to get into character.”
That knocked her speechless. Maybe I was overstepping my bounds, sure. And she'd probably get pissed off at me all over again.
But she was already pretty mad, so I figured taking a chance with her wouldn't hurt.
“Y-you're joking, aren't you?”
I didn't say anything. I couldn't talk, anyway. Was too busy staring at her curvy ass as it bounced in those stretchy shorts.
The vibe was weird between us all of a sudden. It mostly started at the club, when she freaked out at all the girls hanging on me.
What she didn't know was I never had any interest in them. It was her I had my eye on the whole time.
That's why when those guys put the moves on her, something broke inside of me. It infuriated me.
Because I wanted her all for myself.
Figured if she was gonna torment me, I'd do the same back, so I sprawled out on the futon and peeled off my shirt.
“What do you think you're doing?” She fumbled with the coffee pot, but didn't take her eyes off me.
“Not sure what you mean,” I said, resting a hand on my stomach, drawing her gaze right where I wanted it. “You don't expect me to sleep with my clothes on, do you?”
Adorably flustered yet again, she pretended to be organizing the things in her suitcase. It took a lot of willpower not to go up and hug her from behind.
“I can't believe you did that. At Captiva.”
That wasn't exactly the answer I'd been hoping for. Still, she needed to get something off her chest. Maybe I did too.
“You're not going to let that go, are you?”
She slammed her bag shut. “I don't understand you. First, you encourage me to go out and have fun. The second I start talking with someone, you flip out and run them off like you're my overprotective father.”
How could I admit the truth? If I told her I wanted her, that the thought of anyone else touching her made me want to break things, I'd scare her off.
I couldn't have that. I needed her in my life, even if she was just a friend. She was too precious to give up a second time.
“...I just don't want to see anyone hurt you.”
“It's my decision to make, Carter. If I want to flirt with fifty different guys a night, that's my call. If I get screwed over, well, it sucks, but that's life. I don't need you trying to protect me from it.”
She plopped onto the bed and mindlessly flipped through TV channels, never settling on any of them.
“Oh yeah? What about you?” I asked back. “I'm not blind or stupid. The moment your friend Dana started showing off her tattoos to me, there was fire in your eyes. And oh boy, how about the death glares when I was having drinks with those girls at the bar?”
She was silent. Of course, she could say nothing back to that.
I'd had about enough of this. If I didn't settle it now, I'd be so frustrated that I couldn't sleep.
I sat next to her on the bed and put my arm around her. She started to protest, but I shushed her.
“We're not teenagers anymore, Allie. We're adults. I think it's time we cut the crap.”
“I... I don't know what –”
“I'm too old to be playing petty games. There's more than a few things bugging you, and I want to know what.”
She didn't answer, of course, but her small frame trembled at my touch. Her shoulders were so soft and warm; what I wouldn't do to explore the rest of her body next.
The late-night talk show on TV seemed to have her attention more than I did. Finally, she stared at the floor and mumbled something almost unintelligible.
“I guess I'm still just upset about the wedding fiasco. That, and mom forcing me to lie to my grandparents.”
“Is that really all it is? You sure it has nothing to do with a certain kiss, ten years ago?”
Her cheeks turned scarlet. Okay, I almost had her. Just had to take this slow.
“You've been holding a grudge against me all this time. I can't fix it if you don't tell me why.”
“Why?” She pushed me away, slid off the bed, and began to pace around the room. “I seriously have to tell you why? You kissed me. I thought you cared about me.”
“Of course I cared about you.”
“Then why did it only happen once, huh? You never touched me again after that. Just moved on with your life, like it never happened.” She sniffled. “Then three weeks later, you were dating Nina from the cheerleading squad.”
Shit. I should have known; to her, that wasn't some mere kiss. I did it because I was curious what it'd be like. But she had actual feelings for me.
How could I have hurt her so badly? How was I so blind back then? No, I was blind now, too.
“You could have said something to me,” I protested. “Instead, you bottled it up and let this anger fester for years.”
“Because I figured there was no point talking about it. You'd made your intentions clear by ditching me for that... that preppy bitch!”
She threw her balled-up socks at the wall and stormed into the bathroom. I should have gone to comfort her, but I just felt like an ass.
“I think there's been a major miscommunication going on here,” I said. “First of all, it was only one kiss. I didn't ask you out, or dump you, or cheat on you.”
Her sniffling got louder.
“Besides, I was only with Nina for three weeks before I realized I couldn't stand her anymore.”
“Yes, and then you moved on to... Oh, who was it now? There have been so many, I can't remember.” She snapped her fingers. “That's right. Chrissy, star basketball player.”
“Allie, come on – ”
She came out of the bathroom with teary eyes. “Always them, never me. You made it perfectly clear you were more into the stuck-up athlete type. Dorky art chicks like me never had a chance.”
“I didn't know you wanted a chance. Besides, you seem to forget I was a nerd back then too.”
“Don't act all humble. You were the hottest guy in our school and you damn well knew it.”
I was flattered she thought so, but too concerned for her to feel good about it.
“You want me to be honest? Sure. Why not.” The anger on her face changed to sadness. “You were my first kiss, Carter. I thought you'd be my first for... everything else.”
Lord almighty. She wanted me to take her virginity?
I wouldn't lie and say I was a saint in my youth. Truth was, though, I didn't first have sex until I was nineteen. Lost it to some girl at a club and I didn't even know her name.
“I wish you'd have been my first, too. I mean that.”
She snorted. “All you had to do w
as ask.”
We both lingered across the room from each other, both of us wondering the same question – what now?
We'd laid our feelings on the table, but where did we go from here? I knew where I wanted to go.
I wanted to undress her, to hold her and give to her what I should have so long ago. Ten years back, I screwed up. But if she'd just give me a second chance...
“I'm going to get some more towels, since you've already used them all up,” she said abruptly. “And some ice. Can't go to bed without cold water.”
It was like a switch had flipped, and just like that, she was done. She snatched the ice bucket off the counter and slipped out of the room without another word.
Now I knew what people meant by their heart sinking. How dumb could a guy be?
I was so afraid of losing her that I didn't dare to reach out. Now, if I didn't do something, I would lose her again.
The hotel had given us some candles to set the mood. I lit them, dimmed the lights, and thought of her as the room filled with golden warmth.
That big bed looked so empty, but it wouldn't be for long.
I refused to let Allie sleep alone tonight.
Chapter 10 - Alicia
The ice machine down the hall was broken, so I went to the lobby instead.
A young woman staffed the front desk, looking far too cheerful given it was after midnight. She greeted me with a smile.
“And how are you enjoying the honeymoon suite, Mrs. McGraw?”
Why did she have to call me by his name? Why'd I have to like it so much?
“It's great, thanks.”
“If you need anything at all, just ask,” she gushed. “Oh, and our complimentary couples' gift can be refilled for free at any time.”
I assumed she was talking about the condoms and other adult goodies. It was doubtful we'd need a refill on those, considering the lovely argument Carter and I just had.
“Such a jerk,” I muttered as I rode the elevator back up. “One excuse after another with him. If he doesn't want me, then just say so.”
I opened the room door with my key because, of course, Carter didn't come when I knocked. Oddly, the lights were turned down low and – wait, were those candles burning on the tables?
“Come here, Allie. Please.”
There he was, lying on the bed in his boxers. My hands shook so hard that I almost dropped the things I was carrying.
My God, he looked so damn good in that candlelight. The lustful feelings I'd struggled to keep at bay came rushing back. I was too weak to stop them.
“Carter, what's the meaning of this?”
He patted the bed. I set my stuff down and joined him, but made sure to sit on the opposite side.
I couldn't trust myself around him. One touch, and I'd be his. Couldn't give in that easily, not after what he'd done.
But oh, how badly I wanted to.
“You can sit closer. I don't bite.” He licked his lips. “Unless you ask me to.”
“I asked you what this is all about,” I said, not budging.
His thin boxers did nothing to hide his erection beneath the silken fabric. I shouldn't have stared, but the temptation was too much.
“I made a mistake back then. I should never have let you go.”
“And you think I'll just forgive you because you decided to turn on the charm?” I gestured to the flickering candles. “I bet you do this for every girl you're trying to get into bed.”
“Nope. Only you.” He stroked my cheek. There was a strange new look in his eyes. “I can't change the past, but right now, tonight, all I wanna do is hold you.”
“Really?” I raised an eyebrow. “That's all you want to do?”
“Mm, not quite. I'd say more, but I fear you'd think I'm a freak.”
He put his arms out for me, and the urge to be cradled against his chest was too much to bear. I slid out of my jacket; he lay me down on the bed.
When his lips found mine, I felt that same jolt that our first kiss gave me, that surprising spark I'd never felt with any other man.
He'd definitely picked up some tricks over the years. Oh goodness, that tongue... What else could he do with a mouth like this?
“I've missed this,” he whispered. “Missed you.”
When his hands moved lower, I flinched. We'd never gone this far before. What if it ruined everything?
Too late to go back now. I'd take that chance.
Off came my shorts and underwear and finally my shirt. When I was totally naked, Carter just sat there and stared like it was some kind of holy experience.
“You've been teasing me all day,” he said, shaking off his stupor. “But it was worth it. Now I can't wait to explore every inch of you.”
His hands trailed past my tummy to my smooth mound, and he let out a growl of approval.
“What's this?” He stroked me teasingly. “I think someone was expecting this.”
“Not expecting. More like hoping.”
Yes, I needed this. Needed to forget about Andy. Needed a man like Carter to make me feel loved – in the way I hadn't felt for such a long time now.
And goodness, did I feel loved when he settled between my thighs and satisfied me with his mouth. He did things to me with his tongue that my ex-fiance would never do, gave me the pleasure I once had to beg for but with Carter, it came so easily to me.
He let out a content sigh. I opened my eyes and caught him watching me.
“I've never seen you like this,” he admitted, peppering my thighs with kisses. “Your face is so beautiful when you come.”
“When are you going to let me stare at you?” I pulled at his boxers, eager to return the favor.
“You can look all you like, though I think I'd prefer your touch a little more.”
Here I was, seeing him naked for the first time. Just like the rest of him, even his cock was sexy. I reached for him with a shaking hand; he gasped softly as my fingers wrapped around him.
He was so hard, so solid; his skin velvety soft and wonderfully warm. I couldn't wait to feel him inside me.
But first...
“Oh God. Yes.” He groaned as my lips parted for him. “Don't you dare stop. Yes.”
There was something especially erotic about taking him in my mouth. I shut my eyes and just breathed, savoring the taste and smell and everything about him.
Never had I wanted to do this so badly for any other man. But this was Carter, once my very best friend.
He knew me better than anyone. Was always at my side when I needed him. For all he'd done, he deserved this. He deserved more than I could probably ever give him.
Neither of us could wait any longer. He reached for the foil packet he'd set on the nightstand.
“Her Pleasure,” he read off the label. “Time to see if these work as advertised.”
As soon as he was done, I pushed him into a chair and threw myself in his lap. He was surprised, but wove his arms around me and dragged his lips over my neck.
“You the sort of woman who likes to take control in the sack, hmm?”
“Maybe.”
“But what if I prefer to take charge?” His lips found my ear; his breath tickled my flesh. “I think we might have ourselves a power struggle.”
“You always did like to compete.”
For me, sex had never been like it appears in romance movies – until now.
Carter's stare was smoky as I reached for him, so ready to finally have him that I couldn't stop trembling. His thumb on my nipple, his lips on my throat... Yes, this was perfect.
I slid down on him, our eyes locked as he filled me inch by inch. Then, in his embrace, I rode him as deep and hard as I could stand it.
“Fuck,” he hissed, fingers pressed firmly into my back. “Use my cock, Allie. Make yourself come for me.”
His dirty talk was not the silence I had become used to, and I loved it.
When my thighs burned from grinding in his lap, he threw me in the bed and plunged back in with his
arms curled tight around me.
His hand settled over mine on my stomach. He moved it lower, spreading my lips until my body bucked up with pleasure.
With him guiding me, and his fingers gliding over me, it was not long before that familiar tension returned and I was back on the brink again.
Three times in one night? Carter somehow knew how to navigate my body better than even I did.
I heard myself whimper and nibbled on his shoulder, moaning as I lost control and each rhythmic contraction shook me to the core.
“Good,” he whispered, brushing the hair from my eyes as I lay shivering from it all. “More? Because I'm a patient man. I can keep this up all night.”
“I don't... Don't think I can.”
“Then tell me what you want.”
“I want you to, um.” I couldn't say it. “You know.”
“No.” He grinned like a devil as he rocked into me nice and slow. “Tell me. Filthy as you can, please.”
“I want you to come inside me,” I squeaked, still a bit shy.
“Oh, I'm going to,” he growled, moving faster and deeper. “I'm going to make you mine. All mine.”
He uttered a slew of profanities as he came until I kissed him. He kissed me back, rough and hungry, and he held me so tight I could hardly move.
“Do I,” he panted, breathing hard, “still have to sleep on the futon?”
“Certainly not. I want you under the covers with me.”
As we snuggled beneath the blankets, a sense of peace came over me. Already, my ruined wedding was a fading memory – but there was a niggling worry, too.
Our friendship wouldn't be the same after this. How could it be? Of course it would change – but for the better or worse?
Carter wasn't the sort to settle down, not that I wanted it myself, not so soon after Andy. But eventually, maybe. And if he didn't want it, that would hurt me all over again. More than what happened after our first kiss.
But I was sleepy, and I supposed we'd cross that bridge when we came to it. For now, I was content to fall asleep with his arm around me.
Chapter 11 - Carter
I'd never slept with a woman I was really, truly close to. Not the way Alicia and I had grown to be, anyway.
