by Amy Brent
My throat clenched in disappointment. “Yes. They have to go back.”
“I don’t want them to go, though,” Lily said and pulled the blanket from her head. She sat up to look at me with a frown. “They can stay longer here with us. I like Amber, Dad. I like having her around to help me with clothes and stuff.”
“I know that, baby,” I said. “I can help you with your clothes.”
Lily pulled a face at me. “Yeah, but you aren’t good at it like Amber or Mommy. Nothing ever matches if I let you do it.”
“I’m trying my hardest,” I replied, chuckling. “Get dressed, Lily. We have to get out of here in the next hour.”
I closed her bedroom door. I felt relieved to know that Lily was starting to regain interest in clothes again. Her tomboy phase was slowly coming to an end since her mother’s funeral. That was progress I gave Amber credit for because I had no idea what the latest fashion trends were.
I glanced in the spare room to find Ethan still curled up in his bed, but I decided to let Amber get him ready. There were still times that I caught Ethan’s eyes watching me warily. He gladly joined in games if Amber gave permission, but he was still timid when it came to being alone with me.
I credited his piece of shit father for that.
Amber came down the stairs with Ethan on her hip and Lily at her side, while they talked about clothes. It took all my strength to not gather Amber into my arms and to hold her close like I wanted to. Disappointment swept over me.
We couldn’t have a proper goodbye with the kids around us, so I helped pack up Amber and Ethan’s bags into the SUV while Amber buckled Ethan into the car seat. The drive back to the city was long and quiet. I poured all my concentration onto the snowy and windy roads. Plow trucks passed by us slowly as we entered the outskirts of Bozeman.
The Roselynn house was on the opposite end of the city, a few miles out of town. The roads were much better as I pulled through the gated driveway, past a security checkpoint when they waved us in, and parked in front of the spacious four-bedroom home. There were several other vehicles parked in front of the log cabin, including my truck that I had left behind in Colorado Springs to avoid media detection. I cut the engine before turning to look over at Amber.
A lone tear clung to the corner of her jaw. Her sunglasses were pulled down low to cover her eyes, but I could sense the sadness radiating off of her.
“Amber,” I said.
She glanced over at me, her face completely devoid of emotion. I swallowed thickly. There was so much that I wanted to say, but I couldn’t. Not with the kids in the car. I didn’t want to risk Ethan mentioning something to Beau.
“I promise that we will make plans for the kids to get together,” I said. “Soon. Okay?”
The door opened on her side of the SUV. She didn’t get the chance to reply as Joe held out a hand to help her hop out onto the icy and snow-packed ground. I hopped out as well to help the security team carry in their bags while Lily climbed up into my truck, slamming the door shut without a goodbye.
“I’m sorry,” I said to Amber as we walked along the shoveled pathway. “She’s upset that you’re leaving. I don’t know what to say to her.”
Amber smiled empathetically as she shifted Ethan on her hip. “There isn’t anything you can say. I told her that I would make it a point to give you pointers on how to shop for her in the future.”
“I need the advice,” I remarked wryly. “Nothing too pink and frilly, right?”
“Right. Cool and hipster now.”
The front door opened to reveal Beau, who opened his arms up with a wide grin. Ethan immediately slid off Amber’s hip to throw himself into Beau’s arm with an excited giggle. I walked alongside Amber, trying desperately to not reach for her hand, and waited for Beau to finish giving them both a long hug.
“Thank you,” Beau said, clasping me on the shoulder. “I appreciate you looking out for them. They look wonderful.”
I nodded at him. “It was my pleasure. They’re welcome anytime. I’ll let you all settle in.” I caught Amber’s eyes briefly before I took a step back. “I’ll see you all soon, hopefully. Get the kids together again. They seemed to enjoy spending time together.”
“Sounds wonderful,” Beau replied, hugging Ethan close to him. “I’ll call you. We have press all week to get to.”
“I understand. See you all later.”
I walked down along the pathway to the truck when the front door closed shut. I kept my face emotionless as I passed by various members of Beau’s team that followed him everywhere. Lily didn’t say a word for the entire drive to Raychelle’s house. I was glad of that, since I was wrapped up in my own conflicting thoughts.
We arrived at Raychelle’s house, and Lily gave her aunt a long hug before heading upstairs to play.
“What’s going on with her?” Raychelle asked, frowning. “She seems upset, Gage. What is going on?”
“It’s a long story,” I said, sighing. “And complicated. I don’t want to go into it.”
Raychelle pulled me in the direction of the small kitchen. Chicken noodle soup simmered in a pot on the stove. The smell of baking biscuits filled my lungs as I took a seat at the small round table in the kitchen nook. She stirred the soup with a large spoon before pouring us both hefty cups of coffee.
“I’m all ears,” she said. “I can see that something is different about you, too. What is it?”
“Nothing. It’s noth—”
“It’s something,” Raychelle said impatiently. “I’m not blind, Gage. I can see that you’re struggling with something inside of your head there.” She paused for a moment to look at me closely. “Is it a woman? Are you seeing someone new?”
I took a long sip of coffee in response. I wasn’t going to deny that part of it, even if I had no idea what was going to happen between Amber and me.
A smile spread across Raychelle’s face. “So, you are. You are seeing a new woman. That’s great, Gage!”
“You think so?” I asked, surprised. “I figured you would be lecturing me about it.”
“I’m not going to lecture you. My sister would’ve wanted you to move on with your life. You have to move on with your life. It’s natural to feel guilty, but this isn’t a bad thing. God knows that child upstairs needs a mother.”
I ran a hand along my aching head because guilt didn’t even cover how I felt. I had fucked my best friend’s adult daughter, but I also had feelings for her at the same time. It was one fucked up situation that I had no idea how I was going to get out of, let alone navigate through. There was already enough scandal in the headlines surrounding Amber and her father. I didn’t even want to imagine how the press and general public opinion would handle a relationship between the two of us.
“It’s complicated,” I said.
“Of course, it is,” Raychelle replied, frowning. “You lost your wife to cancer. I know how much you loved, Marcie, but there is nothing holding you back from falling in love again. It’s okay to want someone. It’s okay to pursue something that gives you a bit of happiness.”
The timer on the stove went off. Raychelle rose from her chair across from mine to pull out the baking sheet from the oven. I pulled out my phone to pull up Amber’s personal cell number. Maybe Raychelle was right. It was okay to pursue something that brought happiness to my life. Even if it was complicated.
I texted Amber quickly. I hope you and Ethan are okay. I miss you both.
It was a few seconds later that my phone buzzed with Amber’s reply. I miss you more already, xoxo.
A small spark of hope filled me. Maybe it wouldn’t be so complicated. It was only a matter of figuring out when and how I would be able to have Amber alone with me again.
Chapter 16
Amber
The rest of the week passed by with agonizing slowness. The snowstorm had been devastating for several states. My father, being the kind-hearted politician he was, had offered to stay for the entire week to help his fellow congressman
from Montana, while commuting to Colorado Springs every other day. Ethan enjoyed having his Papa back to take him on plenty of car rides, but I was going stir crazy with anticipation of seeing Gage again.
Our month alone had been cut short before anything else could begin. It was a kick to the gut. It was hard enough having to deal with the torrent of feelings I had for Gage, but adding a layer of earth-shattering sex complicated it even more.
A shiver went up my spine as I paced anxiously in the living room where Ethan was currently playing with his toy cars. I missed the feeling of Gage’s hands sliding along my legs, or the feeling of his taut body pushing up against my own. It wasn’t just the physical part, either, that I missed. It was his warmth and kindness, too. He was the embodiment of a rough and tumble man, but he had a heart of gold beneath that tough exterior of his.
The silence between us was deafening. I couldn’t pick up the phone to call Gage’s house without drawing attention from the staff or my father. Cell phones were still down up there. The only hope that I could cling to was that text message after he had dropped Ethan and me off into the chaos of my father’s camp. Stay safe. I’ll miss you.
I had practically leapt in excitement when my father informed me that Gage and Lily were coming down from the mountain for a visit. I spent the past hour taking the time to actually shave all the right parts and to doll myself back up again. Ethan and I rarely left the house with my father and his security detail. The roads were still treacherous, but it was a media frenzy all over again because of Scott.
I came to stop when one of the news headlines on the flat screen caught my attention. There he was. Standing in a circle of reporters, dressed in a sharp suit with his ice blonde hair slicked back from his angry face. He looked directly into the camera. His lips curled in contempt as he spoke.
“Mark my words,” he said sharply. “The rest of the United States will soon see how corrupt the Roselynns are. They don’t deserve so much public trust. Their good religious family is just a false persona. In reality, Beau Roselynn uses his power and wealth to get what he wants. My son, Ethan, is stuck in the middle of this.”
I turned away from the television to hide my own contempt when Ethan looked up at the sound of his father’s voice. Bastard. That was all I could think while I curled my fingers into angry fists. He couldn’t let go of anything. Our divorce was a slap to his ego. Taking Ethan away didn’t even matter to him. That much was clear when his lawyers agreed to giving me full custody of Ethan. It was all about the cameras in his face.
“He just won’t give up, will he?” My father came from the privacy of his office. He looked up at the television screen with a frown. “He gave up custody of Ethan in court. He didn’t fight for custody at all.”
I glanced over at Ethan who had resumed playing with his cars, completely oblivious to it. I didn’t know if it was a self-imposed oblivion, but I was thankful for it.
“It’s not about that,” I said in a low voice. “It’s about me actually having the strength to leave him, and then challenge him in front of cameras. He cares about what people think of him.”
“He’s a fellow politician’s son. He inherited that from his father. Their camp is naturally on the defense these days.” My father smiled at me then as he rested his hands on my shoulders. “I know that I haven’t said this lately, but I’m proud of you.”
“For what?” I asked, smiling up at him. “I haven’t done anything spectacular recently. Your lawyers are the ones to thank for this win.”
“You could’ve told them to back off. No one was forcing you to go through a custody battle, or your divorce.”
“I had to do it,” I said with a shrug. “If I didn’t, it was only going to get worse. I knew that it would be harder to get away the more time passed. And I couldn’t let Ethan grow up in a toxic household like that.”
My father studied my face for a long time. “I can see that your stay with Gage did you more good than I expected.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, heart pounding. “I’m still the same me. Nothing has changed.”
“I’m not sure what it is,” he said. “I’m not going to complain, though. It’s just nice to see you smiling again.”
The phone rang from inside his office. He smiled apologetically at me before stepping back inside, closing the door quietly. I walked to the large living room windows that overlooked the snowy landscape of Montana. The trees were covered in a thick blanket of snow. Several plows were at work on the roads, and the snow drifts were mini mountains alongside the road. It was a cold and slow start to the weekend.
I caught sight of Gage’s truck at the bottom of the driveway where he was stopped at a security checkpoint. The breath in my lungs hitched with excitement. I pressed up against the glass while I watched the security guards glance through his truck. One of the guards spoke into his walkie-talkie to run Gage’s credentials before waving Gage through. The gate swung open a second later.
“Gage and Lily are here,” I told Ethan, grinning. “Are you excited to see them?”
Ethan looked up from his cars with a strange look. “Sure, Mommy. Do you miss them?”
“Of course, I do, silly.”
My hopes of catching Gage alone before he stepped into the house were dashed when Joe, my father’s head of security, opened the front door first. I clenched my teeth to contain my disappointment, but also to resist the urge to run into Gage’s arms. My heart thumped wildly as Gage entered with his arm around Lily’s shoulders. Both of them were bundled up in heavy coats, but Gage looked sexy as usual with his chocolate locks pushed back to reveal the pepper of gray at his temples. His icy blue eyes warmed at the sight of me.
“I’m glad you all made it safe,” I said breathlessly as Joe closed the door behind them. “Were the roads bad?”
“Not too bad,” Gage said smoothly. His eyes were fixated on me, though, and only me. A small fire danced there, but it was enough to fuel the fire inside of me. “The plow trucks have the main streets in the city taken care of. It’s the mountain passes you have to be careful on.”
I could feel Joe’s eyes on the both of us, studying our exchange with a frown. I forced my eyes to where Lily stood at her father’s side as she looked around with wide eyes. She clutched her father’s hand tightly.
“Your house is big,” she said. “I think it’s bigger than your house, Dad.”
That drew a chuckle out of Gage as he reached up to undo the buttons of his coat. “He has more money than me, Lily. He needs a big house to keep everyone in his camp sheltered, too. They don’t know how to deal with Montana’s weather.”
“I grew up in Alaska,” Joe said, mildly affronted. “I know how to drive in the snow. It’s the other people on my team that don’t know how to do it.”
The doors to my dad’s office opened at the sound of our voices. He poked his head out to look at Gage with a wide grin.
“Just the man I was looking for,” he said. “Come in, Gage. I have to talk to you about a few things.”
I caught Gage’s eyes as he ushered Lily to join Ethan on the floor to play cars. I shrugged my shoulders, even though my insides were twisting with nerves and various emotions. I took a seat on the couch while Gage slipped into my father’s office.
“How are you, Lily?” I asked kindly. “I see that your dad bought you some cute leggings.”
Lily glanced down at her patterned leggings with an approving smile. “Yes, he did. He took me shopping after school to pick clothes that I wanted.”
“That’s great. I’m glad that he listened to my advice.”
“He misses you I think,” Lily commented, looking up at me as Ethan scooted along the floor with a car. “He’s been really quiet since you’ve left. I asked if we could come here this weekend, but he wasn’t sure if you were going to be here still.”
The little admission made my heart melt. He had missed me for the entire week since we couldn’t communicate properly. Not without drawing attention.
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br /> “I missed the both of you,” I said. “I’m not sure how much longer we will be here, but I’ll make it a point to stick around as long as I can.”
Lily nodded at that. “Good, because it’s boring when it’s just my dad and I up there by ourselves.”
I half-listened to Lily’s chatter about school when the door to my father’s office finally opened. I turned to find my father’s arm wrapped around Gage’s shoulders.
“You think about what I’m offering,” he said. “There’s no rush on getting back to me. I have other things to keep me occupied in the meantime.”
“What’s going on?” I asked, rising from the couch. “What are you two up to now?”
My father waved an airy hand. “Just business things. Take the SUV, Gage. Avoid the media if you can.” He smiled at me then. “Enjoy your afternoon, sweetheart. At least one of us is getting out of the house today.”
I blinked in confusion, but the phone rang again in his office before I could say a word. I looked over at Gage, who shrugged his shoulders innocently. The living room went quiet, aside from the sound of Lily and Ethan playing on the floor. My father’s team, including Joe, had gone into his office for another meeting. I was finally alone with Gage.
Gage’s eyes were dark with that look of desire flickering to life. My body hummed in anticipation, just seeing him in the flesh, instead of in my memories. I grasped his strong hand and pulled him down the hallway in the direction of the laundry room. I pushed the door open, glancing in quickly to make sure it was empty, before pulling Gage in. He didn’t protest as I locked the door shut behind us.
In the next instant, Gage’s arms were around my waist. His lips were hot and needy against my own while we kissed passionately. I groaned in relief to feel his feel body pressed up against mine again. He pulled back before our senses could get away from the both of us.
“There’s a museum hosting a free event for kids,” Gage said, his fingers running up my back. “Do you want to come with me? It’d just be us and the kids.”
