He beamed at her, a big, happy, thoroughly un-MacKenzie-like smile that lit up the whole room. The judge smiled, Luis and his mom were smiling, the deputies, the clerk, the court reporter—even Patlack was trying to stifle a grin.
While Amy Snyder tapped furiously on her SmartPad.
The judge banged his gavel. “In light of Mr. Knightley’s testimony, I’m continuing this matter for thirty days until such time as the Department is prepared for the court to hear the issue of permanency. Luis, you stay right where you are, and keep an eye on the lovebirds. I’ll expect a full recounting of the nuptials at the next hearing.”
“All rise!” the bailiff barked. “Circuit Court for Damson County is now in recess.”
Around Sid, two-dozen people got to their feet and gathered up their effects. Luis pounded Trent on the back and high-fived James. Mrs. Martineau admonished Luis gently in French, while the DSS supervisor hissed an admonition to Amy Snyder to be prepared to staff the case immediately after lunch.
A few minutes later, Mac lowered himself beside Sid.
He had so many different silences. Tender, considering, thunderous, amused. He could say more without speaking than anybody Sid knew, but he had spoken up for her today, for her and Luis.
“Thank you.” She shredded a tissue in her lap. Where had it come from? “Thank you for everything. Did you mean it?”
“The part about quitting the practice of law?”
“Not that. I’ve told you, I know you’re a good lawyer.” A lawyer who’d hold hands with her right in front of the judge. “The other part.”
Mac settled against the hard bench, resting his arm along the back. “The part about making a very comfortable income?”
Sid needed another tissue, and she needed that air-sickness bag, so great was her internal upheaval. “Not that. The ‘same household’ stuff, the raising kids, that part.”
“The part about will you marry me? Be my best friend, my lover, my wife, my partner in all things? That part?”
Worry played a role in the chaos of Sid’s emotions, as did towering relief and a fat helping of sheer disbelief. Beneath all of those feelings, though, a seed of hope had sprouted. Stubborn, vigorous, joyous hope.
“MacKenzie, you had better not have been lying under oath.”
“I was telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Sidonie Lindstrom, will you marry me?”
Two thoughts collided in Sid’s tired brain. The first was that a proposal in a courtroom, under oath, was a fitting irony. The second had her turning loose of Mac’s hand.
“I’m going to be sick.” She bolted to her feet and dashed to the door.
Chapter 19
“I know it’s awkward having to chase them.” James hauled Mac off the bench by the arm. “But we’re supposed to enjoy chasing our women all over creation. It’s the caveman thing. What are you waiting for? You just proposed to the woman, and she took off on you.”
“I love you, James,” Mac said, “but Sid is not you. She doesn’t scamper off to make me chase her. She needs a minute to gather her composure. She won’t go far, because Luis is here with us.”
“You think I do that? Run off to get you to follow after?” James’s frown became a scowl.
“I think you did that, until Vera outsmarted you. I want to introduce myself to Luis’s mother before the guards finish putting her jewelry back on and whisk her away.”
And Mac wanted to hear Sidonie accept his proposal, but the fool woman had probably been hitting the caffeine again.
Mac brushed past his baby brother, hoping he’d correctly read Sid’s abrupt departure. He hadn’t come to court today intending to propose in front of his entire adult family, Luis, God, the Honorable Paul Stevens, half the Department of Social Services, and the courtroom staff, but he’d trusted the prodding of instinct.
Sid deserved a public declaration, particularly a declaration under oath, that he’d quit practicing law, because she’d believe words he spoke under oath.
Or would she?
Mac waited—in vain—for Sid to come back into the courtroom while Luis introduced him to Mrs. Martineau.
“You will tell her?” Mrs. Martineau was asking. She shot a glare at her son, then turned pleading eyes on Mac.
“I beg your pardon?”
“You will tell Miss Sidonie to adopt this stubborn, proud boy who is getting so tall I cannot spank sense into him anymore?”
Another fierce woman, also honorable where her children were concerned. “You want Sid to adopt Luis?” Mac asked.
“Of course I want this. She loves my son, I cannot be the mother Luis needs now, and we will make agreements about visits and so forth. Sidonie brings Luis to see me whenever he asks. But Luis does not come to see me because I scold him.”
The look she gave Luis held more love and frustration than Mac was comfortable observing.
“You are so stubborn, Luis. I will always be your mother, and I will always love you. The girls know I am their mother too. You cannot change what has happened to them by being difficult now. Better you let Sidonie and Mr. Knightley adopt you.”
The guards gave Mac an apologetic glance, signaling that their time was up.
“I love you, Mama.” Luis brushed a kiss to his mother’s cheek without embracing her. “I will write to you.”
“Thank you, Mr. Knightley, for what you did for my son.” She stepped away and held still while the guards fastened her ankle bracelets. “And, Luis, you eat your vegetables. You’re still growing, and the chips will only make you fat.”
“Yes, Mama.”
Head held high, she let the guards each take her by an arm and lead her away.
“That is quite a woman,” Mac said.
Luis’s lips quirked into a sad smile. “That was quite a proposal. Did Sid accept?”
“She will.” Wherever she was. “I hope.”
* * *
“Better buck up,” Hannah said from the bench beside Sid. “Mac’s spotted you, and you are doomed.”
He came striding up the courthouse corridor as confidently as a shark cut through tropical waters.
While Sid felt wobbly as hell. Time to swear off caffeine for all eternity. “I’m not doomed, but Mac and I have things to talk about.”
Hannah kissed her cheek and stood. “Welcome to the family. Resistance is futile.”
Sidonie certainly hoped so. She got to her feet and hefted her bag. “Hannah, my thanks for the tissues and the moral support and everything. If you’ll excuse me, I have a foster son to collect and tomatoes to weed and résumés to send out and—”
Mac walked right up to her. “And a proposal to accept.”
Hannah pushed Sid’s hair back over her shoulder. “Three flower girls and their mamas will be upset with you if you don’t accept. So will two handsome maids of honor.”
Hannah strolled off, taking her husband by the hand as he emerged from the courtroom, leaving Sid nose to nose with the man she…needed to talk to.
“One of my brothers will give you away if Luis won’t,” Mac said, slipping his arms around Sid. “The other will stand up with me. Something tells me you want to talk this over first.”
“Mac, you don’t have to do this.” Not what Sid had meant to say.
“Hush. We deserve more privacy than the hallowed halls of the world’s busiest gossip mill.” He led her outside the building to a day Sid could now appreciate as one of the best western Maryland could offer. Spring spreading her peacock feathers, in the profusion of blooming red and white tulips in the courtyard, the flowering cherries that scented a soft breeze, the gentle strength of the sunshine.
Mac escorted her to a bench in dappled shade, then sat beside her, keeping their hands joined.
Sid tried to memorize the moment. The strength and warmth of Mac at her side, the shadow
s dancing over the pavement, the breeze teasing the blossoming trees. Such a beautiful day. Such an important moment.
“MacKenzie, as much as I might want to, I cannot accept a proposal made simply to prevent Luis from being sent to Baltimore.” Sid was proud of her level tone, proud of her honesty.
So proud she’d start bawling any moment.
“Sid, I wouldn’t want you to accept an expedient proposal. Luis is a good kid and deserves a loving family, but I would not expect you to marry just any guy whose income would allow you to keep your license. You deserve more than that. Better than that.”
“Explain yourself.” She hadn’t meant to sound annoyed, but she knew how Mac’s mind worked, and he’d make his point in his own good time. “Explain yourself, please.”
“I did not have to propose to you in that courtroom, Sid.” He brought her knuckles to his lips and kissed them. So fractured was Sid’s focus, it was as if he kissed some other woman’s hand. “The job offer from Hartman and Whitney was enough to back DSS off.”
“I don’t think the Department was the enemy. I think it was Amy Snyder, breaking rules and misrepresenting the case to her superiors.”
“Interesting we should reach the very same conclusion, but off topic.”
Sid thought about retrieving her hand, but Mac kept stroking his fingers over her knuckles, and his touch was…good. Soothing.
“What is the topic, MacKenzie?” What day was it, for that matter?
“The topic is why I proposed, Sidonie Lindstrom.” He did drop her hand, and Sid felt a stab of grief to lose even that small connection with him. Then he slid an arm around her shoulders.
“It is not enough that I can make you legally mine for Luis’s sake,” Mac said. “You are the woman I love, the woman I can’t see spending the rest of my life without. I have to know you’re mine in every sense, Sid. Mine and mine alone when it comes to a few important things. That was a proposal of marriage, not an offer to live together until you adopt Luis. That was my heart talking, not my law degree. That farm is the place where I can dream again, but I want us to share that dream, one that includes Luis, a pair of rings, and forever. Now you say yes.”
Mac made the rest of his argument tenderly, his kiss offering comfort with a hint of seduction. He stroked Sid’s jaw until he settled a hand around the back of her head, a warning and a solace.
Gently at first, he offered his kisses. Hello, this is MacKenzie. Your MacKenzie. Then Sid was opening her mouth for him and moaning softly against his lips.
“Now, Sidonie, you say yes.”
She drew away half an inch. “I wronged you.”
“And I wronged you, and we’ve both apologized. Maybe you overreacted, but I predict it won’t be the first time we have to step back, regroup, and talk things through. Marriage isn’t about legalities, Sidonie, it’s about hearts. It’s about love and commitment and years and years to keep polishing a relationship based on those good things.”
“You’d adopt Luis?”
“This isn’t about Luis, but yes. Of course I’d adopt him.”
Mac was quiet. He’d made his closing argument, and it was unbeatable. You are the woman I love, the woman I can’t see spending the rest of my life without…
Sid wanted to say yes, yes, and yes. “I can’t have children, MacKenzie. I’ll want to adopt.”
He kissed her temple. “I took the foster parenting classes over in Wicks County last year without saying a word to my brothers. Had the house inspected, did the physical, the fingerprinting, everything. I didn’t follow through. Children who’ve lost their families should have a mom and a dad if at all possible.”
Oh, how she loved him. Loved his courage, his heart, him.
“You’re wrong, you know.” Now Sid held Mac’s hand tightly. “The legalities matter, and sometimes in a good way. If Luis would let us…” She stumbled over the simple little word. Us. Two letters could hold a universe of dreams. “If Luis would let us adopt him, it would mean something.”
“If you marry me, that will mean something too. If you want to live in sin, I’m willing to do that, but, Sidonie, I will hound you and harass you and wear you down until you marry me simply to keep the peace.”
And Mac could hound with the best of them.
“I love you, MacKenzie, and, yes, I will marry you and share dreams with you and do all that other stuff you said. I will marry you gladly. I’m tired.” She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, the beauty and peace of the day washing over her as she dozed off, right there beside the man she loved.
* * *
“Shouldn’t we have a family meeting?”
Sid followed up her question by worrying a fingernail, so Mac gently extricated her finger from her teeth and kissed her palm.
“I won’t lawyer something this important, Sid. Luis is out in the barn grooming Luna, and that’s a good place to have a tough discussion. Court is next week, and we’ve run out of time.”
Sid was still worried. Mac loved her for worrying, and yet he hated the worry itself. “Come along, Wife.”
She looked sheepishly pleased, as she did every time he called her that.
“I don’t know what to say to him.” Sid slipped her hand into Mac’s, something else that seemed to please her.
“I think it’s more a matter of listening than talking.”
He hoped so, but it wasn’t as if they’d stop loving Luis if he refused to let them adopt him. Still, this mattered to Sid, who had more lawyering tendencies than she wanted to admit, so it mattered to Mac.
“How are my favorite mares?” Mac had to tug Sid up the barn aisle as he put the question to Luis.
“Time to put them on night turnout, I think.” Luis pushed his hair out of his eyes. God in heaven, the boy was shooting up. “They stand in the shade for most of the afternoon anymore, and it’s getting hot.”
“We want to adopt you, Luis.” Mac kept his voice quiet and reached out to Luna, who had decided of all humans, MacKenzie Knightly belonged to her. The therapeutic riding school had been happy to surrender her into Mac’s care, and the draft mares seemed to like her too.
“I can’t let you adopt me,” Luis said, misery in every line of his body. He led the pony to her stall, slowly, because Luna was still none too spry.
“Suppose you tell us why that is,” Mac said, “because I heard your mother badgering you in two languages to get yourself adopted by Sid.”
Luis shook his head and ducked into the draft mare’s stall, so Mac plowed onward. “This has to do with Tony, doesn’t it?”
The kid froze as if he’d taken an arrow in the back.
“You might as well tell us, Luis,” Sid said. “Tony is dead, and nothing you say can hurt him. Nothing you say will make us love you any less, either.”
Luis stayed in the stall, which was dimly lit. “You can’t love me.”
“We do.” Sid’s voice was firm. “We always will, and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
“You should hate me.”
Buttercup nudged at the boy’s back pocket.
“Why, Luis?” Mac asked.
“Tony might still be alive—shit.” Luis leaned against Buttercup’s thick neck. “Tony was drinking the day he died. He said some crazy things.”
Sid’s expression was startled, not disbelieving. “Crazy things, Luis, like he was going to kill himself? End it before things got too bad? Those crazy things?”
Luis looked at her without lifting his head from the horse’s neck. “Things exactly like that.”
“He said the same crazy things to me, regularly.” Sid dropped Mac’s hand and moved to the open stall door. “He would tell me his suicide plans, get them off the Internet, and trade them with his friends like dessert recipes. It was ghoulish and unworthy of him.”
“He said the same things to you
?”
“Sometimes, but I’d yell at him, pull the guilt card, and he’d settle down. I think he was mostly looking for reassurance that I still wanted him around. Besides, his death wasn’t ruled a suicide.”
Sid said that as if she was simply stating fact, not rehashing a painful chapter of her past.
“But he was drinking,” Luis protested. “He came around after school, before you got home, and I could smell the beer on him. He was drinking, and really down, and I could have taken his k-keys…” Luis squeezed his eyes shut and leaned hard into the horse. “But I didn’t. I didn’t take his keys. I didn’t call you or Thor. I told him to take care and try to lighten up.”
The boy started to cry soundlessly, his shoulders shaking, his thin body bowed into the horse’s bulk, a corporeal study in anguish. This was worse than if Tony had made a pass at the kid, or let one of his friends proposition Luis. Worse, and entirely unnecessary.
“Luis, you didn’t kill Tony.” Mac emphasized each word and spoke slowly. “The pathology reports from the accident would have revealed if he were drinking, and he was not.” Sid gave a quick nod of affirmation. “I’ve done enough DUIs and DWIs that I know this. Trust me.”
“He’s right.” Sid put a hand on Luis’s shoulder and kept it there. “Tony couldn’t drink, because it screwed up his meds. He was starting to black out, though. Thor didn’t tell me that until after the funeral, because Thor wouldn’t take Tony’s keys either. He knew I would have if I’d known.”
“Tony was blacking out?” Luis sounded pathetically hopeful. He straightened and stroked a hand down Buttercup’s shoulder.
“The meds he was on did screwy things to his blood pressure, and he wasn’t always careful about what he took when.” Sid slid an arm around Luis’s shoulders. “The beer would have been nonalcoholic, Luis. He and Thor had agreed to that much. Mac is right. As much as the insurance company was trying to prove Tony killed himself, they would have leaped on any trace of alcohol in his veins.”
Kiss Me Hello (Sweetest Kisses) Page 32
