“Same thing you came here for. Taking some space.” He grins. “Well, I’m not hiding from a woman. There’s that difference between us.”
“I’m not hiding from Mia.” I take a seat on the couch across from him. “I’m…doing the right thing.”
“So, doing the right thing involves leaving her alone on your wedding night?” Luke raises an irritating-as-fuck eyebrow at me. “Sounds like a grand plan, cousin. Good thing you became a big hockey star—you’d have failed the hell out of being a nice, normal guy.”
I run my hand down my face in frustration. “So what would you do? Because believe me, the things I want to do with Mia are not nice in the least.”
Luke shrugs. “I’d probably do those not-nice things with her and then regret it in the morning. Or—I wouldn’t regret it. Sometimes you just need to do what you want, Dec. Life’s too short for what-ifs.”
Pain flashes across his face.
My cousin loved being a bull rider. And then one day, that dream was taken from him. So, he took over running his parents’ ranch. He made the transition look seamless, although I know he went through hell.
“I wouldn’t have handled it a hundredth as well as you have,” I say to him out of the blue.
He flicks his gaze to mine. “You don’t know that.”
“I do,” I say. “If I had lost the ability to play hockey…I think I would have wanted to punch a wall.”
“Who says I didn’t?” Luke says in that slow cowboy drawl he has. “What a man does in the dark doesn’t always show in the light.”
“I just wanted to let you know I admire how you’ve dealt with the change in plans. A change you didn’t know would be coming.”
“Appreciated.” Luke gives me a brief nod, and I know that topic is closed.
I’m surprised he let me take it this far.
He stands up. “I’d better go back out to the tent to survey the damage. The party should be breaking up soon. Have a good night.”
I raise my hand in a wave. “Goodnight.”
Chapter Sixteen
Sometimes, before I’ve even stepped out on the ice, I can feel I’m gonna have myself a game. The game after my wedding night is like that. I’m so amped up, and I have nowhere else to put the energy other than onto the ice. Mia was on my mind the entire flight to the east coast.
Even as I hit the ice for pre-game, I can’t push her out of my thoughts.
I’m not used to this. Thinking about a woman during warm-ups is a no-no. I’m always all-in on the upcoming game. Distraction has never been a problem for me before.
But I’ve never been married before, either.
And as I take my warm-up shots, everything feels different.
Mia may not be here tonight. She may not even be watching from our living room, even though I hope she is. But she’s infiltrated my thoughts anyway, and that very fact takes my breath away.
I take a seat on the bench by myself for a moment and try to get my air back. I don’t want to lose my steam before the game’s even started.
“Everything okay?” Coach Tucker drops onto the bench next to me.
I give an immediate nod. “Sure, I’m fine.”
“Dec.” Coach drops his voice to that “listen to me” tone. “I didn’t ask if you were fine. I asked if you’re okay. There’s a difference.”
I guess there is. I’m not used to talking about myself in any way other than hockey, though.
I glance over at my coach. I’ve known Coach Joshua Tucker since I was in high school. He’s a Montana guy, born and raised, and I got to know him when I was in town, visiting my cousins. He’s a good man who cares about his players as people, not just as a commodity.
Right now, his brown eyes are warm and focused on me. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you out of sorts before a game,” he says in a curious tone.
“No worries about the game. I’m more than ready.”
“So what gives?”
I roll my shoulders. “It sounds fucking crazy, but I’m thinking about my wife.”
He breaks into a loud laugh. Running a hand through his graying hair, he says, “I have to tell you it’s a relief to hear you worrying about something other than hockey.”
“I don’t know what you mean.”
Coach Tucker turns serious. “Declan, you’re going to retire as one of the greatest to ever lace them up. All the great ones have one thing in common—a singular focus to be the best. As a coach, that’s exactly what we want in a player. But as someone who’s watched you grow up into the fine man that you are…I want more for you, too. I want you to be happy off the ice as well as on it.”
I’m glad for the helmet covering my face because I honestly don’t know what to say to him.
My dad and I never talk about much other than hockey. I’m not used to someone who’s been a bit of a father figure to me talking about my personal life. I appreciate his perspective, though, and I nod at him.
“I’m trying, Coach. I just want to keep my focus while I’m in the rink.”
“You’re a smart guy, Wild. Somehow, I think you’ll find a way to figure out the balance. That’s what life is, right? A balance of work and play?”
I think of Mia and how much I enjoy spending time with her. We’d promised to curb our sexual relationship once we married. But that doesn’t mean we can’t hang out as friends. Later. For now, it’s time to get to work.
I stand up and skate back onto the ice.
As soon as the puck is dropped, I’m all over the ice.
I score on a breakaway in the first period and assist on one of Arch’s two goals. By the time the second-period buzzer sounds, we’re up, four to nothing, on Pittsburgh.
And the final score reflects where we’re going as a team—
“All the way!” Tex bangs his stick to mine as we leave the ice. “We’re going to the playoffs on a roll, Wild!”
I’ve won the whole thing before. But it was years ago, and in what I privately know is my last year as a player, I want the title badly this year. We’re in first place in our division. This road trip should wrap up a playoff berth. From there, it’s up to us to deliver when it counts.
“You had a goddamn hat trick,” Coach Tucker says to me as I reach the locker room. “One of your best games this year.”
I grin. “We crushed them, Coach.”
He brings us all together for an after-game pep talk.
“We’re doing well, men. Doing well. That was a good game.” He raises his hand in a fist. “You put it all out there from the first play to the last. I’m proud of you. Let’s get ready for our next game, okay? Get a shower, do your interviews, and be on the bus on time. Good work tonight!”
The hordes of reporters hounding me after the game are so distracted by my play that they don’t ask many questions about my new marriage.
I’m relieved they aren’t nosing into my personal life, but the part of me that’s enjoying being a husband for the first time is almost disappointed.
And I can’t wait to call Mia when we land in Philly.
Chapter Seventeen
Mia
Week one as Declan’s wife passes uneventfully.
Why? He’s out of town the entire time.
He calls me, though.
Every night.
“So, how are you settling in?” he asks on night six. He’s in Philly and about to fly to Baltimore for his last road game tomorrow afternoon before he returns to Montana.
“Great,” I tell him truthfully. “I love living on Wild Ranch.”
“Did you catch tonight’s game?” he asks next. His voice has a cute little rise to it like he truly wants to know.
I tell him the truth. “I was working late. Your games start so early here when you’re on the east coast. But I did catch the end of the game last night.” You looked hot. “It was the first time I’ve seen you since our wedding night. Sure, it was through a television screen, but still.” I laugh awkwardly. “You were amazing.”
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br /> “Thanks.” He pauses before he says, “Being married to me so far has kind of sucked, huh?”
I smile. “You’ve been an elusive husband, that’s for sure. But we’ll have plenty of time together once you’re back in Montana.”
“That we will,” he says in a way that makes my stomach clench.
Bad stomach. Declan Wild and I are platonic. Now. Maybe not before marriage—okay, definitely not before marriage—but certainly after it. Because apparently, he and I do everything backward. And in our situation, backward kind of sucks.
After we hang up the phone, I do something I’ve literally never done in my life. I flip through the sports channels.
I’m like an addict looking for a hit.
Of my husband.
Even I can laugh at that irony.
My husband is off-limits to me.
Except it feels like a nuclear attraction that I can’t stop, no matter how hard I try to.
And I do try. I swear.
Yes, I may keep flipping through the channels until I catch highlights of his game. And I may cheer wildly when he scores like I’m totally fangirling him.
But I definitely do not go lie down on the couch afterward and touch myself while imagining his mouth between my legs or his cock buried inside me.
Declan and I promised to have a loveless, business arrangement. Any memories of our night together must be buried deep. Kind of like the way he was inside me that one amazing night…
Damnit! It’s like I can’t stop.
But tomorrow night, things will get real. Because he’s coming home.
So what will we do then when we’re finally underneath one roof together as husband and wife?
I fall asleep on the couch, and when I wake up the next morning, I’m running late.
Jamie Beth calls to ask if I want to meet for drinks after work.
“I can’t tonight,” I say.
“But why…oooh,” she says with a laugh. “Right. Declan comes home tonight.”
Yes, Declan’s coming home, and I can’t wait to see him. I haven’t wanted to admit to anyone, even Jamie Beth, how much I’ve missed him.
But right now, I need to put my husband out of my mind and focus on my upcoming day.
I tell Jamie Beth I’ll meet her at the café at noon, and I hurry to get ready for work.
After a quick shower and a piece of toast, I rush out the door and onto my motorcycle.
I stopped horseback riding after Mom died. That was something she and I did together, a passion we shared. I still love horses, but the riding part I haven’t been able to bring myself to do since I lost her. Instead, I ride a motorcycle. Dad wasn’t happy—he felt like I went from one potentially dangerous hobby to something even worse.
But I have a meeting at a ranch on my way to the office, and the idea of riding there in the sunshine and fresh air is too appealing to pass up.
I’m halfway down the ranch road when I spot Luke in the pasture. He walks toward his truck parked on the side of the dirt and gravel road but then keeps on going, stepping right into the middle of the road to block my path.
I’m sure he’s going to tell me not to ride my bike to work. But instead, he holds up a finger and then reaches into the back of his truck.
When he holds out a pair of wool gloves, I look up at him.
“What are these?”
“They’re my mom’s. They’ll keep your hands warm for the ride,” he says with a tip of his cowboy hat.
“You’re a good guy, Luke,” I say as I take the gloves from him gratefully. “I’m honestly surprised you’re single.”
He shakes his head, those blue eyes of his filled with an emotion I can’t read. “Don’t fool yourself, Mia. Declan’s a good guy. I’m the man no woman should want to bring home to meet her parents.”
“Why do you say that?” I ask him curiously.
He doesn’t answer me; he simply raises an eyebrow. “Declan probably won’t be home until late. You coming to dinner again?” he asks me.
“If you don’t mind.”
“Of course not. You’re family now.”
My heart warms.
He waves as he turns away. “Have a good day.”
I’ve been eating with the Wild cousins nearly every night Declan’s been gone. Between Luke, Cooper, and Chase, one of the cousins always texts or stops by to check on me and invite me up to the house for dinner.
They’re all sweet and friendly, and I feel lucky to have married into such a kind and loving family. Even if it’s temporary—a word that already feels like a twinge in my chest—being a Wild is pretty great so far.
“You certainly have a beautiful spot here.” I walk across the gravel driveway with Valerie Benson, owner of Benson Ranch in Mountainview, and follow her to the barn. “I understand paying taxes on the land can be a hardship.”
“Yes, but we’re managing okay. However, with my husband wanting to retire from the rigors of raising cattle, we’re looking for ways to diversify our income,” she says as we step into the barn. “I thought maybe we could involve the horses somehow. Many of ours love people and are great with kids.”
“Trail rides could be a fun idea,” I say. “Or riding lessons. You’d need qualified instructors for lessons, but I have a list of recommended people I could give you if you’d like.”
“Trail rides intrigue me,” she says as she stops in front of a stall holding a beautiful chestnut gelding. “This guy here was rescued from a bad situation about six months ago. He’s safe to pat. His name’s Apollo.”
“He’s gorgeous.” I put up my hand to let him sniff it before patting him.
“I’m hoping he can be ridden again sometime. He was nearly impossible to manage at first, but now he loves to be patted.”
“Is he your first rescue?”
“Yes, but I’d love to take in more horses. There’s such a need. We’d need more finances to afford to care for them, though.”
“Circle PR is thinking of opening a foundation for equine rescue,” I say before I can stop myself. “It would help provide funds for ranches like yours who want to take in abandoned and abused horses and give them a chance at a new life.”
A foundation for abused horses is a dream I’ve had for years. Mom and I shared that dream, but Dad’s always been worried we’ll get in over our heads and won’t be able to meet our expenses. So, I’ve let him hold the line on that, and I’ve stepped back. I always planned to pursue a foundation, though, just as soon as I was in charge.
“Really? That would be wonderful.”
“It would be. We have to make sure it’s viable before going forward with it,” I say. “Let’s finish looking over your ranch so I can assess other possible income streams for you.”
My afternoon is dragging.
I can’t wait to see Declan, and I keep checking the time on my phone impatiently. I don’t expect him home before midnight, and right now, that feels like it’s ages away.
“Mia!” Dean rushes into my office just before five. “Channel Five News just called. Chronicle Montana wants to do a segment on Circle PR for its section dedicated to local ranches.”
I shoot up from my chair behind my desk. “Are you serious?”
Dean raises his hand, and I give him a high-five. Then, I rush around my desk and give him a hug.
“This is so awesome!” I say. “Did they say who’s doing the interview? Is it Angie Fells? I love Angie!”
“I’m not sure who it will be,” Dean says, his blue eyes sparkling with the same excitement I’m feeling. “But this is huge for the company. You’ve been wanting to get on that show for years.”
“I know. My mom wanted Circle PR to be on Chronicle Montana so badly; she must have called them dozens of times.”
Dean’s expression turns somber. “You can dedicate this to her then.” He runs his hand over his nearly bald head. “She was the one who hired me all those years ago. I started in the mailroom and made my way up here. I owe her a lot.”
>
I put my hand on his flannel-covered arm. “And that’s why you’ll do the segment with me.”
Dean’s eyes widen with fear. “No way. I’m terrible in front of a camera.”
“How do you know?” I ask him. “Do you have experience?”
“No,” he says. “That’s my point. I have no experience because it’s not my thing. Your dad should do it with you.”
I laugh. “I’d agree with you except my dad freezes whenever he has to do any kind of public speaking. He handles the money and the behind-the-scenes stuff great, but the client part, not so much. After Mom passed, he panicked. I guess he thought maybe I shared my mom’s gift of gabbing and handling public speaking. She was amazing, and I always hope to be a quarter as good. I figure that’s good enough for most accounts.”
Dean smiles at me fondly. “You’re far better than a quarter as good, Mia.”
Between my long talk with Dad about our television slot and finishing up my work, by the time I leave the office, I’m exhausted. And it’s long after five.
I’m so tired I don’t even want to ride my motorcycle home.
I’m standing outside the elevator bank on my floor while I debate calling for a cab when I hear—
“Mia.”
I whip around.
Declan is standing three feet away from me.
Declan Wild, my husband, who I haven’t seen since our wedding night.
Without giving any thought to what it means, I run and jump into his arms.
“I’m so glad to see you,” I say into his neck.
He smells like fresh soap and his woodsy cologne. I pull my head back so I can look at him.
He smiles, almost looking surprised. “I figured you would have enjoyed the alone time to adjust to everything.”
“I enjoy company.” Especially yours. “You’re dressed all fancy,” I say teasingly as I admire his coat and tie.
He grins. “Didn’t have a chance to change after my press conference.”
Declan (Wild Men Book 8) Page 9
