by Lucy Gordon
‘I’ve seen the way he looks at any woman he’s trying to seduce. That special expression he can put in his eyes...’
That special expression. She had seen that expression in his eyes, and it had pleased her more than she cared to admit.
He wanted her. She wanted him to want her. And there lay danger.
Suddenly Vittorio stopped, taking hold of her shoulders and looking determinedly into her face.
‘You’re not taking any notice of that nonsense, are you?’ he demanded. ‘Do you really believe I’m trying to lure you into bed for the pleasure of dumping you afterwards? Is that what you think? Is it?’
‘No,’ she protested. ‘But obviously it’s what everyone else thinks. It makes me look like the biggest fool on earth. I’ve got to get out of this place—and this time I’m going to leave for good.’
‘Jackie, please think straight. If you leave again you’ll make me look like the biggest fool on earth.’
‘Can’t you understand? They think I’m so desperate to marry you that I spread the rumour we’re engaged.’
‘And if I know one thing about you it’s that you’re not desperate to marry me. This is my fault, for what I said at the bank. And I have to put it right.’
‘Fine. Go back there and tell them the truth.’
‘What truth?’ he demanded. ‘We have so many truths, and some of them contradict each other.’
‘The truth that we fight all the time—that we don’t trust each other and can’t talk without hurling accusations.’
‘That won’t convince them that we’re not going to marry. Quite the reverse. Some of the most successful couples I know keep up their battle from morning till night. I’m beginning to think we’re perfectly suited to each other.’
‘Very funny.’
‘True—it is funny. I like a laugh. The thought of laughing with you for the rest of my life has a certain appeal.’
‘But laughter fades after a while,’ she said. ‘We’ve got to be sensible.’
‘Sensible? Us?’
‘Yes, it doesn’t sound likely, does it? But I think it’s time to put things right.’
‘How do you want to do that?’
‘We return to the ball separately. We’re very polite to each other—’
‘You mean with the kind of frigid politeness people use when they actually want to murder each other?’
‘Yes. But I’ve had that temptation often enough to know how to overcome it.’
‘Okay, I’ll obey your orders. We act indifferent, but I think we should have a polite dance with each other.’
‘To confirm the indifference,’ she said.
‘Right. Let’s make a start.’
‘You go first.’
He went in ahead of her. Jackie waited several minutes and then she too returned to the ballroom, going at once to where coffee was being served, and talking politely to the guests she found there.
On the far side of the room she could see Vittorio dancing again, talking cheerfully to his partner. He seemed oblivious to her presence—but that was the polite distance they had promised each other.
‘Will you dance with me, signorina?’
The man standing before her was a duke. Extending his hand, he led her onto the floor, silently announcing to the world that he had heard the rumour of their engagement and she was accepted in Vittorio’s high society.
After him she was claimed again and again. There was no doubt that she was a success.
Across the floor she could just make out Marisa, approaching Vittorio, speaking to him intensely. From her expression she seemed displeased, and clearly his reply did not improve her mood.
So he’d made her understand that she had no hope, Jackie thought. But what had he told her about their imaginary engagement?
Her mind was spinning with everything that had happened that evening. Between herself and Vittorio things seemed to change from moment to moment, leaving her permanently confused.
And now came the moment for which she had been waiting. Vittorio advanced towards her, hand outstretched, and asked theatrically, ‘Will you do me the honour, signorina?’
She went into his arms, feeling them close around her as they went spinning across the floor. Even as they whirled she was acutely aware of the curious faces following their every movement.
‘They’ve heard the rumours of our engagement,’ he said. ‘They’re trying to decide how true it is. Time to tell them.’
As the music ended he raised his voice.
‘Can I have your attention?’
All around them couples slowed to a halt, staring at him curiously.
‘I think you know Jackie,’ he said. ‘Ever since we came here as a couple everyone has wondered about her. Are we lovers? Are we going to announce our engagement soon? Guess what. We’ve wondered that ourselves. We have our disagreements—sometimes too often. And we’ve told ourselves—and each other—that these troubles made it impossible for us to be together.’
Jackie turned wild eyes on him. What was he thinking of, to let strangers into their private lives? This way he would make her look more foolish than ever.
‘But there’s something more important than troubles,’ Vittorio declared, still speaking loudly to the crowd. ‘And this is it.’
Before Jackie realised what he was doing he pulled her into his arms and laid his mouth passionately over hers. At first she was too stunned to react, but the feel of his lips caressing hers soon took possession of her mind, her heart and her flesh.
From all about them came cheers and applause. Everyone was delighted.
‘It’s time we gave them the message finally,’ he whispered.
‘How do you mean?’
Suddenly his arms released her and he dropped down to one knee.
‘Jackie, will you marry me?’ he called, loud enough for everyone to hear. ‘Will you make me the luckiest man on earth? Will you make me unbelievably happy?’
He looked up at her.
‘Do I get an answer?’ he said.
‘Do you really want one? Aren’t you just fooling?’
‘No, I’m not fooling. Will you marry me?’
‘Then my answer...’ she took a deep breath ‘...is yes.’
The cheers were riotous.
She had the dizzying sensation of having won a triumphant victory for the first time in her life. Plain, dull Cinderella had won Prince Charming.
Well, perhaps Prince Charmless, she thought. But she wasn’t complaining.
Tania came forward, arms outstretched to embrace her.
‘What a lovely thing to happen!’ she declared, loud enough for everyone to hear. ‘I’m so glad.’
Everyone got the message that despite her low birth Jackie was being welcomed into the Count’s family. It was all settled happily and the ball could continue to the end of the evening.
* * *
Together Jackie, Vittorio and Tania bade the guests farewell, and at last the castle was empty.
Tania kissed them both.
‘He has made the right choice,’ she told Jackie. ‘It’s so lovely to see that just for once he’s got it right.’
‘Just for once?’ Jackie queried comically. ‘Surely he gets things right more often than not?’
‘You’ll find out about that—but hopefully not too soon. Wait until after the wedding before you discover what a clown he can be. Then it’ll be too late for you to escape.’
‘Thanks a lot, Aunt.’ Vittorio said wryly. ‘What would I do without you?’
‘You’d have married one of those stupid debutantes. As it is, you’ve got a woman who’ll keep your feet on the ground and make you act sensibly.’
‘Hush,’ said Jackie urgently. ‘He doesn’t wan
t to act sensibly.’
‘That’s what I like to hear,’ Vittorio said, slipping his arm around Jackie’s waist. ‘A woman who understands me.’ He laughed. ‘And now I think I’ll go to bed. It’s been a heavy day. Jackie—we’ll celebrate tomorrow. I’ll buy you a ring.’
‘Lovely,’ she said, smiling.
She doubted if he was really tired. He simply wanted to get away from her to sort out his thoughts. She understood, because it was the same with her.
They left the ballroom together. As they went upstairs she waited for him to say something about that devastating scene, but he was silent.
At her door he said, ‘We’ll talk tomorrow. We have much to say.’
In her room she stripped off the black satin dress, hanging it up with great care. From now on she would treasure it as a sign of the new Jackie.
But who was Jackie now? she wondered.
Suddenly she no longer knew.
Was Jackie the woman whose heart reached out to Vittorio despite her sensible resolutions?
Tonight should have been a delight. He had declared his longing for her before the world.
Yet deep within her there was still the suspicion that he wanted to marry her not for love but to silence the troubles that still disturbed him. He longed to make things right with his father’s memory. Other people would have found that strange and incredible, but to Jackie, also intent on keeping her father’s memory alive, it made sense.
Suddenly there was a slight sound from outside, followed by a click as the door was opened.
‘Can I come in?’ Vittorio asked.
‘Yes.’
‘I thought I should come and apologise,’ he said. ‘It must have been a shock when I sprang that proposal on you. I just got a bit carried away.’
‘It’s all right. Don’t worry. I’m not actually expecting you to marry me.’
‘Everyone else is.’
‘Meaning Marisa and the other women? Soon she’ll grab herself a husband and we can pretend until then.’
Vittorio gazed at her incredulously. ‘I said you were a woman who understands me, and I was more right than even I knew.’
‘I understand you well enough to know you don’t want to get married—so don’t worry.’
He gave a brief, wry laugh. ‘You’re only half right about that. Sometimes I’m not keen on marriage, but sometimes I feel that you’re the one person who could tempt me.’
She regarded him with her head on one side. ‘Temptation is there to be resisted,’ she said. ‘Be sensible.’
‘According to you, I always resist being sensible. Maybe I’m right. Perhaps it’s something we should think of.’
‘Think of marriage?’
‘Unless this is your way of rejecting me. Is your answer no, Jackie?’
‘I don’t know,’ she said slowly. ‘Everything is so confused between us. We’re often friends, but we hover on the verge of being enemies.’
‘I know. But somehow enmity just doesn’t work. We always return to being—well—’
‘Friends?’
‘That too, but friendship is too simple.’
‘Don’t you feel friendship for me?’
‘I feel all sorts of things for you that I don’t want to feel. I try to fight them, but they fight me back.’
She nodded. ‘I know what you mean.’
‘Do you remember that night we spent together in Rome?’
She considered. ‘I’m not sure we actually spent it together. We were on the same bed, but in different worlds.’
‘There were some very close moments. I can remember lying in your arms. I wasn’t sure how I got there, but it felt wonderful—warm and safe, and as though the whole world had changed and become kinder.’
His gentle tone revived her memory of waking with him, looking into his face and seeing it vulnerable as it had never seemed before. The sight had touched her heart, arousing a feeling of protectiveness towards him that had never entirely faded.
‘Yes,’ she murmured. ‘The world was different.’
‘We can make it different, if that’s what we want.’
‘If we want it badly enough.’
He stroked her face with tender fingers. ‘I know what I want, and how badly I want it. But is it what you want?’
‘Perhaps,’ she whispered.
‘Ah, yes—perhaps. The word that we said could decide everything. Perhaps we need to know more.’
He drew her closer, placing his mouth over hers.
He was right. They needed to know more. They needed this.
She moved her mouth against his, telling herself that she was merely seeking information, and what she learned sent shivers of delight through her.
But then she was invaded by a thought that made her draw back.
‘What is it?’ he asked. ‘Am I doing something wrong? Don’t you want me?’
‘Perhaps...’ she said, echoing their significant word.
‘Is that your way of keeping me doubtful?’
‘No, it’s my way of saying I want to be sure if you really want me. Have you forgotten that time when you began to kiss me and then backed off, saying I was too vulnerable? You might be going to do that again.’
He groaned, and dropped his head so that she could no longer see his face.
‘Why did you do that, Vittorio? Why did you reject me?’
‘I didn’t reject you. Believe me, Jackie, I didn’t. I forced myself to let you go. I wanted you so much that I didn’t dare go on any more.’
‘But why? What would have happened if you’d gone on?’
‘We would have made love, and then you would have known—everything.’
‘Would I? Do we ever know what “everything” is?’
‘Not really. We think we do, but there’s always something—’ He gave a sigh. ‘I meant everything about me—how I feel, the power you have—’
‘What power? I don’t have any power. You could turn your back on me and leave at any minute.’
‘Could I?’
‘Go on—prove it. Reject me.’
He regarded her for a moment with a curious expression, as though he was trying to be quite certain of how she was manipulating him. At last a knowing smile took over his face.
‘You know I can’t reject you. You’re just demonstrating your control and my weakness.’
‘Then prove me wrong. Go on. Toss me aside.’
‘If I could, I would. But I can’t. You have me. I’m yours. Now you can crow with triumph.’
‘I don’t think I’ll do that,’ she said, sliding her hands around his face. ‘I think I’d rather enjoy exercising my control.’ She smiled. ‘Kiss me. That’s an order.’
He obeyed at once, touching his lips to hers. She waited for the kiss to grow more forceful, but that didn’t happen. The soft touch continued, filling her with a sensation of sweetness that made her want to weep with pleasure.
Then he increased the pressure, and suddenly the kiss was as forceful as she could possibly have desired. She responded joyfully, urging him on further, and felt his embrace grow more intense as he moved towards the bed and drew her down beside him.
His hands began to explore her body, pulling away her clothes. Her heart beat more strongly as things progressed to their inevitable conclusion.
When it was over peace descended on her as they lay together.
‘Are you all right?’ he asked, gazing anxiously down into her face. ‘Did I do wrong?’
‘Do you think you did?’
He shook his head. ‘Having you in my arms feels more right than anything has ever felt before. Do you mind if I stay?’
‘For as long as you like.’
He gave a sigh of pleasure and e
ased down so that his head lay on her breast.
She enfolded him with an instinctive protectiveness that overcame her to her own surprise.
Who would ever have thought this man would need her protection? Yet instinct told her that he did, for reasons that he himself had never suspected.
‘Go to sleep, my love,’ she whispered. ‘I’m here. I’ll always be here for you, as long as you need me.’
He didn’t move, but she felt his breathing grow deeper.
‘And you do need me,’ she murmured.
He slept almost motionless for the rest of the night, and awoke looking lively.
‘That was a great night’s sleep.’ he said. ‘No bad dreams. What about you? Did I keep you awake, lying on you in that position?’
‘Not at all,’ she said cheerfully.
In truth she was feeling slightly stiff, but the pleasure of giving him a peaceful night was stronger than anything else.
‘I’d better go before anyone sees me here,’ he said, rising quickly.
At the door he turned to look at her anxiously.
‘Jackie, things are all right between us, aren’t they?’
‘Perhaps,’ she said.
‘Perhaps?’ He laughed. ‘You know, that’s a perfect answer. Bye, now. See you later.’
He vanished, closing the door behind him. Jackie lay back, closing her eyes, relishing memories of the night before, wondering where they would lead.
CHAPTER TWELVE
SHE WENT BACK to sleep and overslept, and was late going downstairs. Vittorio wasn’t there, and only arrived half an hour later. From the frown on his face it was clear that he was displeased.
‘I need a word with you,’ he said.
‘Has something happened?’
‘Yes. I’ve been in touch with the bank. I wanted to return your money, but I can’t. It seems you’ve put a block on your account so that nothing can be put in it. Did you do that?’
‘Yes.’
‘Why?’
‘Why did you try to put the money in again, against my will? You know how I feel about it, yet you’ve tried to force it on me again.’
‘So you fought back by blocking your account against me?’ he snapped.
