She nodded. “But only if Greg’s health improves.”
“You’re taking a huge risk. Are you sure it’s worth it? Do you love this child?”
“Of course I do,” she said. “As far as I’m concerned, he’s my son, no matter what the law says. I know it’s a risk, but it’s one I have to take. Leaving him behind before left this huge hole in my heart.”
Kevin couldn’t help wondering where this left the two of them. “You have a lot on your plate right now. I know I’ve made it worse.”
“Not worse. I just wanted so badly for you to understand. When you wouldn’t take my calls, I thought there was no way we’d ever get back the friendship we had before.” She met his gaze. “I hated the thought of that.”
“It wasn’t much of a picnic for me, either,” he admitted. “I had no idea how much I’d miss you. I kept telling myself it was for the best. Bree suggested I was using this situation to keep from admitting how much I love you.”
He stood up, walked around the table and held out his hand. Shanna placed hers in his and stood up. The air between them sizzled.
And then the door opened and Henry came bursting in, followed by his grandmother. He skidded to a stop at the sight of Kevin. Shanna tore her hand out of his grasp and knelt to give the boy a hug.
“How was your day?” she asked him. “Did you have fun with your dad?”
Kevin caught the subtle shake of Mrs. Hamilton’s head, even as Henry’s eyes welled up with tears.
“Greg wasn’t feeling well,” she said stiffly.
Shanna gathered Henry close. “I’m so sorry, buddy.”
“It was okay,” he said, putting on a brave face. “Grandma and Grandpa took me to a baseball game.” He sighed. “But the Phillies lost.”
“Oh, dear, you really aren’t having a good day, are you?” Shanna said, brushing the tears from his cheeks.
“I’ll bet I know a way to make it better,” Kevin said, not entirely sure he should intrude, but unable to stand by and watch the boy’s misery. “Why don’t we pick up my son and go out on that boat trip I promised you?” He met Shanna’s gaze. “What do you think? We won’t stay out late.”
“I think that’s a wonderful idea,” Mrs. Hamilton said, regarding him with sudden approval. “Henry loves boats, don’t you?”
Henry nodded eagerly.
“Okay, then,” Kevin said. “Shanna, you know where the marina is. Why don’t I meet you and Henry there in an hour? I’ll go get Davy.”
She smiled at him. “We’ll be there.”
As he passed Mrs. Hamilton, she stopped him with a touch on his arm. “Thank you,” she said in an undertone. “He really needed something to turn this day around.”
Kevin nodded. “I’m happy I can help.”
And though everything he’d learned here this afternoon made his heart ache for both Henry and Shanna, he was filled with determination to see that their lives got better from here on out. He’d been raised to be protective of those he loved. Now, it seemed, he counted Shanna and that little boy among them.
Henry couldn’t stop talking about going out on Kevin’s boat. The trip seemed to have wiped out all of the day’s earlier unhappiness.
“It was so fun, wasn’t it, Mommy?” he said again as he climbed into bed.
“It was great,” she agreed.
“And Davy’s really smart for a little kid, huh?”
“He is.”
“Kevin knows lots and lots of stuff about the bay. Did you know all those things he was telling us?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“I want to learn all that, so I can do what he does someday,” he announced.
It sounded to Shanna as if he’d developed a serious case of hero worship. On the one hand, she was glad about that. Heroes had been in short supply in his young life. On the other, there were no certainties about what role Kevin might continue to play in his life.
“Kevin says he’ll see me after school tomorrow,” Henry announced. “He says he brings Davy by the store sometimes when he gets home from work and that we can go for ice cream.”
This was news to Shanna. “He told you all that, did he?”
“He promised,” Henry said, his expression serious. “Does he keep his promises?”
“He’s kept all the ones he ever made to me,” she assured him.
“Cool.”
She leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead. “Get some sleep, kiddo. It’s way past your bedtime and you have school in the morning.”
“But I wanted to look at one of those books you have on the bay,” he protested.
“Tomorrow,” she insisted.
“Okay,” he said readily and closed his eyes.
Shanna stood there for a moment, lost in the joy of knowing he was here with her and safe. In a few days she’d know if this arrangement would last.
“I can’t sleep if you’re going to stare at me,” he murmured.
She laughed. “Sorry. I’m turning out the light right now. Love you.”
There was only the slightest hesitation before he whispered, “Love you, too.”
Outside his door, she leaned against the wall and blinked away tears. Every time she earned those softly spoken words, she felt blessed. One of these days, she hoped he’d learn to say them freely, filled with trust in the love surrounding him.
The house was in a total state of chaos. Abby’s wedding was two hours away. Megan was in an absolute frenzy over last-minute details. Jess had run off to make sure everything at the inn was under control. Bree and Trace’s sister Laila were trying to keep Abby calm, no small task with Carrie and Caitlyn underfoot and practically dancing with excitement.
Kevin spent one minute in the midst of the frenzy, then headed outside, where he found Jake, Connor and Mick trying to keep Trace calm. Kevin looked at his soon-to-be brother-in-law and shook his head.
“What’s your problem, pal?” he asked the groom. “You were the one who couldn’t wait for this day to get here.”
“I’m not relaxing until Abby’s walked down the aisle and actually said I do,” Trace said. “There’s still time for her to back out.”
“She’s not backing out,” Mick told him. “I won’t allow it.”
Kevin chuckled. “Don’t let her hear you say that. She’ll be on the first plane to anywhere, if she thinks you’re issuing edicts.”
“Good point,” Mick said, reversing his stance at once.
Just then Carrie and Caitlyn ran outside, the ribbons in their hair already coming undone, curls escaping.
“Mommy looks really, really beautiful,” Carrie told Trace.
“I’ll bet she does,” he said.
Caitlyn reached for his hand. “Wanna see?”
“Nope, it’s bad luck,” Trace said, holding back.
Both girls stared at him, not comprehending. “How come?”
“It’s just a silly superstition,” Mick said. “But women believe it, so men have to act accordingly.”
“I don’t get it,” Carrie said.
“Neither do I,” Mick said. “How about I take you two over to the inn? We can check and make sure everything’s ready for the ceremony. Trace, you want to come along? We’re just in the way around here.”
“I’ll grab Davy and meet you there,” Kevin said. “I want to go over his duties as ring bearer again. Otherwise the wedding rings are likely to wind up at the bottom of the pool.”
Trace frowned at him. “Don’t even joke about that.”
Kevin patted his shoulder. “Settle down. Everything is going to go smoothly. Davy is going nowhere near the pool, with or without the rings.”
“Okay, fine,” Trace said, wiping his brow.
Mick shook his head, his expression pitying. “For a man who was so intent on getting on with this wedding, you’re in a sorry state today.”
“I’ll be fine after the ceremony,” Trace repeated. “Has anyone heard from my folks?”
“They’re meeting us at the inn,” Kevin reminde
d him.
Trace nodded. “Right.”
“In case you were wondering, your sister’s inside with Abby,” Mick added. “Now that everyone’s accounted for, can we go?”
“Sure,” Trace said, following Mick and the girls to the car.
Fifteen minutes later, Kevin found them on the lawn at the inn where chairs had been set up on the grass for the ceremony. Tents had been set up for the reception following the service. The bay, splashed with the colors of sunset, would serve as a backdrop for it all.
There were only about fifty guests expected, and most had already arrived. He spotted Shanna, holding Henry’s hand, standing off to the side. He crossed to her. She saw Davy and immediately knelt down.
“Don’t you look handsome,” she told him, adjusting the collar of his tiny tuxedo. Then her gaze met Kevin’s. “How are you doing? You look almost as nervous as the groom.”
“I have a lot of responsibility making sure my kid makes it down the aisle with the rings,” he told her. “Trace is already freaking out about it.”
She chuckled. “Based on what I saw, Trace is freaking out about everything.”
“If you ask me, your friend Laurie and Drew had the right idea. Do all this on impulse and get it over with.”
“Now there’s a romantic notion,” she commented.
“Georgia and I put our wedding together in two days and got married in the airport,” he said, then wished he’d kept his mouth shut when he saw Shanna’s expression. She looked dismayed. “I suppose you had a big, fancy wedding.”
“It was really, really big,” Henry confirmed. “I was there.”
Shanna sighed. “Which just goes to prove that it doesn’t really matter what kind of wedding you have. There are no guarantees.”
“True,” Kevin said, suddenly feeling deflated. Lately he’d been feeling more optimistic, about his life, about the two of them. Now, in less than a minute, he’d brought them both down.
“Look, I’d better get Davy over there with the rest of the wedding party. I’ll see you after the ceremony, okay?”
She nodded.
He started away, then turned back. “You look beautiful by the way. I don’t think I mentioned that before.”
She smiled self-consciously.
“Even prettier than the bride,” he added.
She chuckled then. “Don’t you dare say anything like that to Abby. She’ll be justified in hurting you.”
“I’ll try to remember that.”
As he walked away, he fingered the jeweler’s box in his pocket and wondered if somehow before the end of the day, he’d find the courage to ask Shanna to marry him.
Shanna stood on the inn’s lawn, openmouthed with shock, when Abby’s bouquet landed in her arms. She hadn’t even been aware of reaching for it.
“Well, I guess that all but seals things,” Bree said in an undertone. “You have to marry my brother now.”
Shanna laughed. “I don’t see his name tucked among the flowers.”
“Well, you certainly can’t run off and marry someone else,” Bree said indignantly. “It wouldn’t be right.”
Kevin walked up just then and scowled at his sister. “Go away, Bree.”
“I’m just saying—”
Kevin cut her off. “Go away. I’ll take it from here.”
“You know she’s just looking out for your interests,” Shanna told him.
“She’s implying that I can’t figure out what I want and go after it,” he said. “Come on. I feel like taking the boat out.”
“But the boys—”
“Gram and Mick are taking them back to the house.”
“You were so sure I’d agree to go with you?”
“I was hoping. Well? Are you coming with me?”
With her heart hammering in her chest, she nodded and followed him to his car. Minutes later they were on the boat and he was casting off.
When they were in the middle of the bay, surrounded by sparkling water, stars and moonlight, he dropped anchor and let the boat drift. Then he joined her at the railing.
Shanna turned to face him and lifted her gaze to his. “What do you want, Kevin?”
“You,” he said without hesitation.
She blinked at the certainty in his voice. “Really?”
“You had to know that,” he said, studying her. “What about you? What do you want?”
She’d risked her heart by taking Henry in. It had paid off, too. The court had agreed to let him stay indefinitely. Now she dared to risk it again. “You.”
“I wasn’t sure after the way I treated you.”
“I’ve wanted you for a long time,” she admitted candidly. “But I wasn’t sure I had the right to love anyone or to be loved after what happened with Greg and Henry.”
“I can’t think of anyone more deserving of being loved,” he told her. “Can we start fresh, Shanna? Can we move forward from right this moment with no secrets between us, and see where we go?”
“I already know where I want us to go,” she said, not willing to wait. Life could be all too short, something he should understand even better than she did. She regarded him with a moment’s uncertainty. “You do know that Henry and I are a package deal, right?”
“I knew it the first time I saw you with him,” he said. “I think Davy will like having a big brother. I know I’ll love having a stepson when the time comes.”
When the time comes? His words sent a chill through her. He was hedging his bets. She could tell. He wasn’t all in, not the way she was.
“I thought you knew what you wanted,” she said. She gestured around them. “I thought that’s what this was all about.”
“I do know,” he insisted. “But I rushed into marriage once for all the wrong reasons. I want to take my time with you, savor every step. When you and I get married—and there’s not a doubt in my mind that we will, just so you know—it will be because we’re both a hundred percent ready for that kind of commitment. We have two boys to consider, too. They need a family they know will last.”
Shanna saw his hesitation as an unwillingness to commit, as an inability to trust what they had. He was looking for guarantees that were impossible.
“Kevin, I’ve already said I love you and I meant it, but—”
A look of pure panic crossed his face. He cut her off. “Marry me,” he blurted.
Shanna reeled from the sudden change. “What?”
“I don’t want to lose you. Just now, I saw that look in your eyes and realized you might walk away. I can’t let that happen.”
She studied his face intently. “Are you sure?”
He nodded. “I started thinking about this weeks ago and then Henry appeared and I started coming up with a thousand and one excuses for waiting. Bottom line, just like you, I know what I want. Why wait?”
She regarded him doubtfully. “Less than a minute ago, you wanted to wait, to make sure you weren’t making a mistake like the one you believe you made with Georgia.”
“I can’t argue with you about that. The timing, the circumstances…” He shrugged. “I believed Georgia and I had something special. I wanted to believe it. And I’ll never regret that I have Davy because of that decision.”
“Of course not,” she said.
“I know what I want,” he insisted. “For real this time. There’s not a shred of doubt in my head or in my heart. I want you and me and those boys, forever. Maybe a couple of girls of our own.”
“You don’t get to pick,” she reminded him.
“Girls, more boys, it won’t matter. The point is that you’re the wife I want, this is the family I want. Waiting won’t change that.”
She wanted to believe him so badly. “You’re sure? A hundred percent?”
“A thousand percent,” he said. He reached in his pocket and pulled out a box. “See. I’ve been carrying this around. I walked down Main Street at least three dozen times planning to come in and propose.”
“But you didn’t.”
/> “Something held me back,” he admitted.
“Paralyzing fear maybe?”
He shook his head. “No, I was waiting for this. You and me, with stars in the sky, a path of moonlight on the water. I wanted to give you the romance. Being out here on my boat, with the lights and stars sparkling on the water, beckoning us back to shore, to home, it just seems right.” He brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. “We’re both always so darn practical. For once I wanted things to be special. I wanted to do something you’ll remember always.”
Her lips twitched slightly. “You proposing is pretty memorable. The setting is just the icing on the cake.”
“And this?” He slid a diamond onto her finger.
She studied the ring in the moonlight, seemingly fascinated with the way it sparkled. “How could I not say yes to a man who just gave me the stars?” she whispered. “Who knew you had that kind of magic in you?”
“It’s not me. It’s love. It brings out the magic in everyone.”
And as he looked into her eyes, Shanna knew it was true. What they had was magic. Maybe even strong enough to guarantee forever. But even if magic alone wasn’t enough, she knew with everything in her that they had what it took to make it. They just had to keep their hearts open and listen.
ISBN: 978-1-4268-3384-7
HARBOR LIGHTS
Copyright © 2009 by Sherryl Woods.
All rights reserved. Except for use in any review, the reproduction or utilization of this work in whole or in part in any form by any electronic, mechanical or other means, now known or hereafter invented, including xerography, photocopying and recording, or in any information storage or retrieval system, is forbidden without the written permission of the publisher, MIRA Books, 225 Duncan Mill Road, Don Mills, Ontario, Canada M3B 3K9.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.
MIRA and the Star Colophon are trademarks used under license and registered in Australia, New Zealand, Philippines, United States Patent and Trademark Office and in other countries.
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