“After the European tour. We agreed on that much.”
They had, but now Steve was worried that somehow, with three months to let his anger cool, Max would convince himself—and maybe Dare and Logan—that they still needed the thieving, backstabbing son of a bitch to rule their careers.
“Is money really that important to you?” Steve blurted, because dropping their label would naturally cut into their finances, at least temporarily. Even with the guy skimming money off the top, bottom and both sides, he did know how to promote a band and help them make buttloads of cash.
“It’s nice to have.”
Steve knew Max had been poor growing up, and maybe he hadn’t had the most loving family to make destitution somewhat bearable, but he had to know that there were things more important than driving a Rolls Royce and having a big house on a hill.
“I’m not exactly rolling in cash these days,” Max said quietly.
Steve gnawed on his lip. This was news to him. Maybe he should talk to Max more often. “If you’re having problems, maybe Dare could—”
“Save me from my own stupidity? Yeah, no. I don’t even want him to know about it.”
But he was confiding in Steve. The two of them had never been especially close. Not rivals, exactly, but tension always stood between them. Steve wasn’t sure if anyone was truly close to Max. He wasn’t the type of guy who let people in. He had a certain outgoing persona he shared openly with their fans, but it was superficial, and he never maintained it when he was out of the public eye. Very few people knew Max well. Dwelling on that fact now, Steve wondered if the reason Max always tried to protect Sam was because their manager was one of the few people Max had allowed to get close. Steve had always been baffled as to how anyone—especially someone as savvy as Maximillian Richardson—could be so blind to Sam’s shortcomings, that he’d never even considered the reason why Max defended him.
“I know you think we’re going to fail without the label backing us,” Steve said, “but we’re pretty amazing dudes.”
Max chuckled at that, but didn’t deny it.
“I think we can succeed without any record label at all,” Steve said, knowing they’d agreed to shop around for a new label before going full indie—which was what Steve really wanted.
Max shook his head. “You’re such a rebel.”
“He just doesn’t like anyone to tell him what to do,” Zach mumbled from the back seat.
Steve had thought Zach was out; how much had he overheard? Not that Steve worried about Zach blabbing secrets, but Max might. “Unless it’s some woman that he’s in love with. Then he’s a doormat.”
“I’m not a doormat.” He just liked his woman to be happy and didn’t care if it was at his own expense. So far, Roux hadn’t taken advantage of that tendency in him, but Bianca sure had.
“Total doormat,” Zach said. “That’s why he needs me on this tour, so his new girlfriend doesn’t take complete advantage of him.”
If thinking that Steve needed him for that reason got Zach to Europe, Steve wouldn’t argue. But he couldn’t stop himself from defending Roux. “She’s not like that,” he said. “She won’t take advantage of my generosity.”
“Well, if you guys are brave enough—or stupid enough—to actually go indie, you’d better watch your cash flow a bit closer, dumbass.”
“True. I probably shouldn’t have bought a friend of mine a new custom motorcycle for his birthday,” Steve said, drawing a finger to his lip. “Maybe I should cancel the order.”
“I’d still love you,” Zach said.
Steve decided that Zach had slipped into advanced drunkenness, where he became extremely sentimental. Max did not need to witness that. It could get too mushy to tolerate in a matter of seconds.
“You’re the only thing good in my life,” Zach said in a shaky voice.
“You only say that because it’s true,” Steve teased, reaching over the seat to punch him and help Zach check himself. He also gave Zach a silent warning to keep his distance, because he doubted that Max would understand if they hugged it out.
“Maybe we should try going indie for a year or two,” Max said, as if completely deaf to the conversation around him. “And if it doesn’t work out, I’m sure we can find a new label.”
Steve stomped his foot as if he had a brake pedal on his side of the car and jerked his head around to gape at Max. “Are you serious?” he sputtered.
“It’s just a couple of years,” Max said, shrugging.
Steve had no idea what was going on with Max to suddenly make him so open to change, but he thanked God for it, whatever it was. Afraid he’d change his mind, Steve didn’t push him for details or even hug him in a stranglehold. He wrestled down the euphoric excitement coursing through his veins and said, “That sounds reasonable.”
“Do you think Dare and Logan will agree?”
“I know Logan will,” he said. He and Logan had discussed going indie dozens of times.
“I’ll talk to Dare,” Max said. “See if he thinks this is the best course of action.”
Now wait a second. Max wasn’t going to take credit for this idea of going independent. Steve had been championing that goal for years. He tried not rocking the boat for at least three seconds before he blurted, “If this works out, this was all my idea. But if it fails, it was yours.”
Max laughed and said, “Either way, it was yours. Everyone knows that.”
And Steve could do nothing but stare in disbelief. He’d never known Max to be reasonable about risk or change. Maybe he had an identical less-evil twin who had assumed his identity when no one was looking. Steve wondered if the guy could sing. He’d sure like to keep him around.
Twenty-Four
Roux settled into the business class seat in which she’d be spending the next eight hours and tried to calm her nerves. She’d expected the excitement, the surreal feeling that this was finally happening. She’d even expected the overwhelming eagerness to see Steve when they landed in the UK. What she had not anticipated was feeling like she was going to toss her American cookies/British biscuits (she’d been practicing her British English) as the scope of the adventure squeezed in on her from all directions. She reached for the bullet on the bracelet around her wrist and found only the gorgeous diamond and ruby tennis bracelet that Steve had given her. She admired it for a moment, loving the significance it represented, but it did not calm her nerves. If anything, it made her more nervous. Not only would she be in the spotlight and making sure her performances were nothing short of perfect, but she’d be trying to figure out how to juggle a romantic relationship on top of that. She wouldn’t change any of it, but she was worried that she’d make a spectacular mess out of her career, her life, her romance.
Taking the seat beside Roux, Iona fastened her seat belt. Roux looked around for Raven, who was supposed to sit next to her, and found that she’d been stuck next to some stranger. Raven shrugged as if she didn’t care. Had Iona finally realized that Roux was avoiding her so she couldn’t let slip the plans she’d made with Steve for the next three months?
“Wasn’t it nice of Sam to spring for business class?” Iona stretched her feet out far in front of her. “Look at all this legroom.”
Roux knew about Sam’s treachery with Exodus End—not every detail due to a strict nondisclosure clause. Steve had forbidden her to even mention their troubles with their manager until after they officially split with him, but she was worried about how Exodus End’s crisis with Sam would affect her own band. Every instinct told her to warn them, but without Sam, they wouldn’t be where they were at all. Her need to protect her boyfriend by keeping quiet, and her sisters by blabbing everything she knew was tearing her in two.
“I’m not sure Sam is a good fit for us,” Roux said, hoping that statement was vague enough to keep Exodus End out of legal jeopardy while seeding a kernel of doubt into Iona’s head. Her second-eldest sister was a shrewd businesswoman at heart, and if Iona believed they had better options
, she wouldn’t hesitate to pursue them.
Iona snorted. “Yeah, being successful and pampered rock stars is so out of line with our goals. We’d never want to tour the world opening for an incredible band like Exodus End. We enjoy starving and not being able to pay our rent. Sure.”
“He’s just a little too slick in my opinion.”
“And that’s why he’s so good at what he does.” Iona patted her arm. “I know you’re not interested in the business side of music, and that’s okay. Stop worrying, sweetie, and let me figure out how to get us to the top. You concentrate on being the best keyboardist in rock and roll today and leave the logistics to me.”
Roux bit her lip to keep from blurting that Exodus End was going to fire Sam in a few months. She didn’t know why they were getting rid of him, but Steve had been so excited about ditching their manager that he’d told her they were firing him even though he couldn’t share any details. Surely Sam had done something truly awful to get himself axed. But maybe she was worried about nothing. Maybe Exodus End just wanted a change. The knots in her stomach weren’t buying her attempts to rationalize the situation.
“So, how’s Steve?” Iona asked.
Roux knew her well enough to read her true question: How are you going to keep from seeing Steve on tour? Roux hadn’t shared her plan to see Steve as Katie. She doubted that Iona would think it a good idea. But the days she’d been separated from him had been pure hell, and she knew she wasn’t strong enough to keep him at a distance when thousands of miles were no longer between them.
“Excited about the tour, I think,” she said, fiddling with her diamond bracelet. She had never realized how often she’d used the bullet on her bracelet for comfort until she’d loaned it to Steve.
Iona grinned. “I think he’s more excited to see you. I’ve never known any man to send a woman two or three gifts a day.”
Roux’s face flushed with heat. He had been a bit over the top with the gifting. Few of the items he’d sent had been expensive—oranges after she mentioned she liked them, an electric fan for her keyboard when she’d said the stage lights were hot, a CD with a song that reminded him of her, a vibrator when she whispered she missed having him in her bed. Her protests against the extravagance had gone ignored, so she’d started to anticipate what he’d send next—and especially those short, written sentiments that accompanied every gift—rather than feel guilty for accepting his generosity. She only wished she could afford to reciprocate. He assured her that it was better to give than to receive, but damn, how many blow jobs did she owe him now? Her jaw ached just thinking about it, but she planned to make him a very, very happy man when she saw him tomorrow. He had invited her to join Exodus End on their private jet, but she couldn’t abandon her band on their first transatlantic flight. Besides, Logan’s girlfriend would be on that plane, and Roux figured it was best to not spend hours upon hours in her company. Toni was a smart woman. She’d eventually figure out that Katie and Roux were the same person, and though Steve trusted Toni with their secret, Roux didn’t. It would also be rather difficult to convince Iona that she’d be keeping her distance from him if she hopped on his jet the first day.
“He’s very good to me,” Roux said, tucking her hair behind her ear.
“It’s going to be tough to stay away from him while you’re on tour.”
Roux knew that was Iona’s passive-aggressive way of reminding her she wasn’t supposed to be in contact with Steve.
“Yeah,” she said vaguely, glad the flight attendant had started the safety demonstration as the plane backed out of the gate. She could pretend to concentrate on how to survive a crash and avoid inevitable questions from their leader. Iona wasn’t even the oldest—Lily was—but she definitely had the right personality to head the band.
“Three months isn’t so long.” Iona squeezed Roux’s hand, which rested on the armrest between them. “And you’ll be so busy, the time will fly by.”
“Mmm hmm.” Roux’s stomach was starting to twist into knots. She’d never kept a secret from one of her sisters. She didn’t like the way it felt. But she liked the feeling of not seeing Steve even less. “I wish we could have talked Mama into coming to see a show.” Perhaps changing the subject would help Roux feel a tad less guilty.
“Maybe when we get hugely famous we can afford to invite all the younger girls along as well. She’d have to say yes then.”
Roux could have asked Steve to foot the bill for transatlantic flights for eight more members of her family, but even though she knew he wouldn’t hesitate to bring her that joy, she could never ask it of him. Baroquen would make it. Probably not as quickly as Iona envisioned, but Roux had faith that with hard work and persistence, they’d get to where they wanted to be. She knew that every one of them wanted the band to be a success, but their reasons were entirely different. Iona wanted to be a superstar, a household name, and to never have to worry about money again. Lily wanted everyone she loved to be proud of her, so she’d already gotten that wish whether she realized it or not. Sage’s main goal was and always had been to support Azura, who just wanted to have as much fun as possible, and who could possibly have more fun than a young, beautiful, and famous rock star? Roux struggled to identify her own goal. Did she really care about fame and fortune? She loved playing the keyboard and sharing Baroquen’s music with people—touching their lives in some small way and bringing them moments of joy. She supposed her goal was to make everyone happy. Deep down, she knew that wasn’t possible, but she could bring smiles to as many faces as possible, and she supposed the more well-known Baroquen became, the more she could fulfill that wish. More fans equaled more people made happy by their music. So yes, she did want to become famous, but not for the same reason as Iona or her sisters.
Iona spent most of the flight writing lists and ideas in her ever-present notebook. Roux figured it must be hard to be that ambitious. She didn’t think Iona’s mind was ever quiet. Part of her drive came from an endless tap of internal motivation, but she’d become even more obsessed with success after she’d started dating Kyle. He’d given Iona the self-confidence she’d needed to go after her dreams, and she hadn’t slowed down since. Roux was surprised that Kyle had been so scarce since Baroquen had signed with their new label. She hoped it didn’t mean that Iona and Kyle’s relationship was faltering.
“How are things with Kyle?” Roux asked.
Iona dropped her pen in her open notebook and scowled.
“That good, huh?”
“He’s so stubborn. I asked him to give me these three months to focus on my career, and he acts like I never want to see him again. Men!”
“He loves you. I’m sure the thought of being without you for that long is devastating.”
“It’s not devastating when he’s the one too busy working to take a weekend off.”
“Do you really want him to back off for three entire months?”
“It would make things a hell of a lot easier.” She picked up her pen, her scowl shifting into a lopsided grin. “But no, I don’t really want him to back off. I love that he’s stubborn. I hope that he shows up and demands to see me. I’m crazy that way.”
Roux giggled. “I sure hope he’s a mind reader.”
“Nope. He’s a man.” She sighed loudly. “He’ll think I meant what I said. Which means if I want to see him, I’m going to have to swallow my pride and invite him to visit.”
“Pride is highly overrated.”
Iona squeezed her arm affectionately and then picked up her pen to scribble more notes. Roux tried to concentrate on reading a novel but found herself so distracted by thoughts of finally getting to see Steve again that the words didn’t make sense. Her attempts to take a nap were equally fruitless, so she watched an inflight movie, not sure what it was called or what it was about. She’d never been this crazy over a guy before. She wasn’t sure that she liked the feeling. She liked him, no question. It was the can’t-concentrate, the can’t-sleep, and the-can’t-live-without-him
feelings he evoked that she would happily relinquish.
“You’re not going to last five minutes,” Iona muttered as the plane made its final descent into Glasgow to catch their connecting flight to Nottingham. Roux was straining to peer out the window at the dreary overcast day, not looking for landmarks but for Steve. Like she’d recognize him from this altitude. She wasn’t even sure he’d be landing there. Exodus End’s jet would likely land at a different airport and not have a connecting flight at all. But he was closer to her here than when they’d been on opposite sides of the United States.
Oh my God, Roux. Get a fucking grip.
She turned to find Iona smirking.
“I won’t last five minutes at what?” Roux asked.
“Staying away from Aimes.”
That obvious, was she?
“I might as well tell you that I do plan to see him,” Roux said, surprised she’d kept her plans to herself as long as she had.
Iona opened her mouth, but Roux raised a hand to stop her outrush of words.
“Hear me out. He’s promised never to interact with me in anything but a professional manner when I’m in costume, but when I’m not, we’re going to be together. He’s even going to call me Katie.” Iona drew in a breath to again start her scolding, but Roux blurted, “No one knows who I am when I’m not in my makeup! They won’t figure out that I’m part of Baroquen, so they won’t think any of us fucked our way onto the tour.”
“Are you finished?”
Roux lowered her eyes and nodded. A strange mix of anxiety and relief warred within her. She knew Iona would be mad, but facing her wrath would be easier than lying to her.
“You should have said something sooner. We can help you see him,” Iona said. “Protect you both from snooping paparazzi.”
Huh?
She must have looked as perplexed as she felt because Iona chuckled and patted her hand. “It’s obvious that you love him. If you were just fucking him for fun, I’d feel differently, but I would never stand in the way of your happiness, sweetie.”
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