by Dori Lavelle
“Come for me, baby. You can let go now.” I know she wants to, but she’s stopping herself from falling over the edge. She wants to have me inside her longer, to stretch the moment as much as she can.
I grab her hips tighter and pump into her harder. My dick hits her clit from all directions. I’ll get her over that edge if it kills me.
My spine tingles when her pussy clenches even tighter around me, and her body stiffens. It’s time. I lift her all the way to the tip once more and piston into her again. She bites her lower lip as she finally lets go and allows the pleasure we’ve built to arrest her. When the sound of my name spills from her lips, I follow her over the edge.
“Look at me,” I say as I come over and over inside her, my teeth clenched as her inner muscles clamp against me, sucking me dry.
Now that we’ve got that out of the way, it’s time to get real. I have a question for her, but I had to fuck her one more time, in case it’s the last time I get to do it. She attempts to climb off me, but I hold her in place for a bit longer.
With my dick still buried inside her, I meet her gaze. “I need to know something.”
“What?” She sweeps her long hair to one side and runs her fingers through it, then drops her head.
One of my hands moves from her hips to her chin. I make her look at me again. I need to know from her amber eyes whether she’s telling me the truth. “Is this what you want, Jia?”
“What do you mean?” She chews a corner of her lip.
“This.” My gaze lowers to the place where our bodies meet. “Me inside of you ... Forever.”
“Of course.” A nervous giggle escapes her lips. “That’s why I’m marrying you.”
“Do you agree to have me as the only man to fuck you till death do us part?” My gaze bores into her.
“Of course. You’re so silly, Lance.” She giggles, but the sound comes out as a squeak.
“It’s not my intention to be silly. I mean it. I want an honest answer from you. Do you want to get married to me?”
“I don’t understand why you’re asking me this.” She places her hands on both sides of my head and moves her face closer to mine, but I move my head away. I want to have a clear view of her eyes. “What’s going on, Lance?”
“You tell me.” I pause. “I’m not really sure you want this. I have a feeling something has changed between us. On the one hand, I believe you want to be a part of my life, but, on the other, I feel you slipping away. You’re here and not here at the same time.”
Her shoulders sink when she sighs. “Really? I didn’t think—”
“During dinner, did you really have a headache?”
She shifts her body ever so slightly, but I get the answer I need. “I thought so.”
“I’m sorry.” She blinks several times before meeting my eyes again. “I’m so sorry, Lance.”
“Why did you do it? Why did you lie to us ... to me? Do you have a problem spending time with my family?”
“That’s ridiculous, and you know it.” Fire explodes in her eyes. “That’s really unfair of you to say. You know I love your family.”
“And yet you lied to get out of having dinner with them.”
“I did have dinner. We had already eaten.”
“And a few minutes more in their company would have killed you? They took time out of their lives to celebrate with us, for God’s sake.”
“It’s just that I was exhausted. I’ve been so busy with the wedding and everything.”
“I hired a wedding planner to take care of all the details, so you wouldn’t have to do everything yourself. Why don’t you let her do her job?”
“Because I want everything to be perfect. I want to add my own personal touch to the happiest day of our lives. I really do want to marry you, Lance. I don’t want anyone else but you.”
“But you don’t seem happy. If you really want to be my wife, why are you not happy? Does your being distant have something to do with my late wife?”
She doesn’t respond. Shit. Another question answered.
“Jia,” I run my hands down her shoulders. “Do you feel as though you’re second-best?”
“Sometimes.” She manages a tremulous smile. “I don’t think I can compete with your love for her.”
“But Alice is gone, Jia. She’s not coming back.” My hand cups her cheek. “You are here with me. She’s just a memory, a memory I will always cherish, but a memory nevertheless. You’ve been in love with other people before me, but I don’t let that stop me from building a life with you.”
“I know. I’m being silly. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m sorry.” She presses her lips to mine, and I kiss her back for a moment before pulling back.
“You mean the world to me. Alice taught me how to live and love again. She gave me another chance at love and life. I get to live out that chance with you. Never doubt how much I love you.” I press my forehead to hers. “Don’t you dare!”
“I promise,” she whispers.
“I know my family can be a lot sometimes. If you ever need a break from them, tell me. Don’t ever lie to me again.”
“Okay.” She leans back to look at my face. Her eyes sparkle with tears. “I’m really sorry I lied. I love you so much.”
“And I love you.” We sink into another kiss that heats up our bodies again, but as she starts to rock against me one more time for another round of fucking, my phone rings.
“Shit,” I say against her lips as I pull it out of my pocket.
“Just ignore it.”
“I can’t. It’s Luisa.”
“Oh, no. I hope nothing is wrong.” Jia lifts herself off me and goes to the bathroom while I talk to Luisa.
“What did she say?” Jia asks when she returns, looking incredibly delicious naked.
“Rose is refusing to go to bed. She wants me to say goodnight in person.”
“Then you should.” She picks up her bra and starts to put it on. “I can come with you to sleep over.”
“Fine.” My gaze sweeps the length of her body. “On one condition.”
“What is that, Mr. LaClaire?”
“That we finish what we almost started again, but in my bed this time.”
Jia places a hand in front of her mouth to stifle a giggle. “Well, I happen to love your bed.”
7
Jia
As soon as we arrive at Lance’s villa, he heads straight upstairs to Rose’s room. I remain downstairs, pretending I need something to drink. In truth, I’m looking for a few minutes away from him. I totally underestimated how much he knows me. I should be more careful if I don’t want my secrets to be exposed—if I don’t want to lose him.
I walk into the kitchen, switch on the lights, and open the fridge. The cool air touches my skin as my mind drifts off. Then I catch myself and force my mind to return to the present. I have to stop this. I have to pull myself together.
I take out the bottle of fizzy water, but as I pour myself a glass, guilt gnaws at my insides. I feel guilty for drinking Lance’s water, for being in his home, surrounded by his things. I feel guilty for being in his life. I don’t belong here. If he had known who I was, there’s no way he would have let me into his world.
I drink the water slowly, taking my time. The cool stream slides down my throat to my stomach, allowing it to cool my insides. During our drive to the villa, I had considered asking Lance to drop me off at my place, but I need to spend as much time with him as possible, to reassure him of my love.
Left with no more reasons to remain downstairs, I climb the stairs one at a time. I want to get to the top, but at the same time, I don’t. What I most want to do is walk out the door, to find a place to hide. But if Lance finds me gone, he’d get suspicious.
He’s already in his bedroom, sprawled out on his massive bed, hands clasped behind his head, peering at me through his thick lashes. I shiver at the intensity of his gaze. It feels as though he can see right through me, as though he can read my thoughts an
d see my fears.
“Ready to finish what we started?”
“Sure.” I run a hand through my hair, loosening the knots. “After I give Rose a good night kiss.”
“Funny thing.” He gives me a dimpled smile. “She’s out like a light. Apparently, she fell asleep five minutes after I talked to Luisa.”
I shake my head with a chuckle. “That’s all right. I’ll go give her a kiss anyway. Wherever she is in dreamland, maybe she’ll still feel it.” I turn to walk back out the door.
“Jia,” Lance calls. I turn around.
“You’re so good with her,” he says. “She loves you so much.”
“The feeling is mutual.” I reach for the doorknob. “I’ll be right back.”
I take my time walking through the hallway toward Rose’s room. At first, I come to stand at her door, wondering what I’m doing. Lance was right that Rose is attached to me. What if things don’t work out between him and me? How would she react to never seeing me again? What if she hates me for what I did? Maybe the best thing for me to do is to keep a distance from her. But that, too, would raise questions in Lance’s mind. I have to keep going, to keep pretending I’m the person they think I am.
I open the door and stand in the dark, listening to Rose snoring softly. The sound of her breathing is calming. I send up a quick prayer to the god I’m not even sure exists. I pray that no matter what happens between Lance and me, Rose will get to live a happy, untroubled life. I pray she never has to live with the weight of a dark secret on her shoulders.
The room is so big that it takes several steps for me to reach her princess bed. I sink down onto the edge, my hands between my knees, my eyes closed. I continue to listen to her gentle sleeping sounds. Then I open my eyes to look at her small frame. I place a hand on her head, her soft hair curling around my hand. I keep it there to draw in her warmth and comfort.
I lean down and plant a kiss on her cheek. My lips linger there for a moment longer than necessary. When she stirs, I sneak out of the room before I wake her.
I find Lance still on the bed, but this time he’s naked.
My gaze runs down his strong chest and settles on his erection. “That’s risky. What if I’d brought Rose to sleep with us?”
He points to the baby monitor on his nightstand. “If she were awake, I would have heard her talking.”
“True.” I allow a smile to warm my heart. As I walk to the bed, I force myself to forget what had happened at The LaClaire and take my time getting undressed.
Lance’s gaze sweeps across my naked body. My body heats up in response. It’s so sexy to know he only has eyes for me.
“Come here. I need to fuck you.”
“Yes, sir.” I climb under the sheets, where he turns me away from him and slides in from behind.
When it’s all over, and Lance has his arms tight around me in the darkness, my tears come. I close my eyes, begging for sleep to take over, but an image of the man from the restaurant flashes behind my eyelids.
I open my eyes again and stare into the darkness. I wait for Lance to fall asleep, my heart pounding wildly in my chest. Once he is snoring softly like Rose had done, I lift his arm from my body and slide out of bed.
I tiptoe to the bathroom, my phone in my hand, and lock the door. I had switched it off before leaving the ladies room at the restaurant. When I switch it back on, I’m not surprised to find fifteen missed calls—all from the same number.
Beads of sweat push through my skin and join to form rivers flowing down my temples. I lower myself onto the lip of the tub. I want to call the number, to tell Kirk to leave me alone, but that might be a bad idea. For all I know, Lance could have woken up and is on the other side of the door.
I draw in a few deep breaths and lift my phone to my ear to listen to one of the voice messages.
His voice thunders through the line, raspy from years of smoking.
“Alana, it’s me. We need to talk. Call me back. If you don’t—”
I switch off the phone before I hear the rest of the message. The phone falls from my slippery hand onto the bathroom rug. I bring my hand to my mouth, and for the first time in years, I start to chew my nails again. I’ve been such a fool to think the past wouldn’t catch up with me. Since I haven’t prepared for his return to my life, I have no idea how to protect myself from him.
My phone vibrates to life, and I almost jump out of my skin.
A sigh of relief floods from me when I see Grace’s smiling face on the screen. I consider not picking up, but what if Grace’s call is a sign that I should confide in her? Maybe I should come clean. She might be able to help me.
I answer the call.
“Jia, sweetie, I’m so sorry. Were you sleeping?”
“I … no. I’m fine.”
There’s a pause on the other end. “Oh, sorry to call so late. We just got home. I wanted to see if you’re feeling better.”
“I ... Yeah.” I grip the phone tighter, forcing myself to say something more. “I’m okay.”
“Is the headache gone?”
I swallow hard. “I’m fine,” I say again, unable to come up with more words.
“Jia, are you sure you’re all right? You sound upset. Did something happen?”
I nod my head, but the word ‘yes’ doesn’t leave my lips. “No,” I say instead. I pull in a breath. “Everything is great. I… I’m great.”
“Wonderful. Will you make it to Unique Bridal tomorrow?”
I lay a hand on my forehead. “Unique Bridal?”
“Yeah.” Grace sounds confused. “Brooke and I are going to try on our bridesmaid dresses. You wanted to come.”
“Oh, yes, sure. I’ll be there. Goodnight.”
I’m glad I didn’t confide in Grace. She’s a LaClaire. She wouldn’t feel comfortable keeping a secret from Bryant, who would tell Lance immediately. It would be unfair of me to ask Grace to betray her family.
I have no choice but to deal with Kirk Dillon all by myself.
I switch off my phone and go back to bed.
8
Jia
Lance always wakes up at 5 in the morning. I get out of bed one hour earlier. I want to be out of the house before he’s awake. I can’t let him see me in this state. My eyes are red and swollen from all the crying last night.
Just as I’m about to zip up my dress, Lance stirs and throws his arm above his head. I freeze and count to twenty. When I’m sure he’s asleep again, I grab my stuff and slip out of the room to finish getting dressed in one of the guest rooms.
Less than ten minutes later, I tiptoe down the carpeted stairs. I’m about to make it to the front door when I bump into Eva, who’s carrying a full basket of laundry.
“Good morning, Miss Jia.” She clasps her hands in front of her. “How are you today?”
From the bright expression on her face, I can’t tell if she notices my red, swollen eyes.
“Good morning, Eva.” I shift from one foot to the other, desperate to get going, but not wanting to seem impolite.
She dips her head to one side. “Can I make you some breakfast?”
“No, thank you.” I glance at my watch. Lance will be up soon. “I have to get going. Please tell Lance that I had to leave early. I have some urgent things to take care of. I’ll call him later.” I give her a small wave and walk away. “Enjoy your day, Eva.”
“You too, Miss Jia.”
I burst out the front door and descend the front steps way too fast, almost tripping on my high heels. Behind the wheel, I let out a sigh of relief and start the car.
At my apartment, I take a long, hot shower and cover up the dark bags under my eyes with concealer. I’m only able to handle an apple for breakfast, which I eat while sitting on the couch, staring at the front door.
Since I had the locks changed, no one has broken into my apartment, but I keep waiting for it to happen again.
At 10 a.m., I leave the apartment to go and meet Grace and Brooke at Unique Bridal.
When I come to a stop at the first traffic light, I switch my phone back on. As I had expected, loads of missed calls and voice messages spring out at me. My stomach churns with dread.
I don’t want to hear what he wants to say to me, but as terrifying as it is, I need to know what his plans are. I can’t bring myself to listen to his message again, so I read one of his many texts instead.
You’re playing a dangerous game, cupcake. Call me back or I’ll tell. K.
A bolt of pain hits me hard in the stomach, sending a wave of bile shooting up my throat. I toss the phone onto the passenger’s seat and grab a plastic bag with wedding fabric samples. The urge to vomit is so strong, I don’t get the chance to empty the bag. I puke into it until my stomach is empty. Done, I wipe my mouth with a tissue and throw it into the bag before twisting it closed.
Through the rush in my ears, I hear cars honking. The light has turned green, and they want me to move.
I roll my windows open to let out the sour smell of my vomit and put the other drivers out of their misery.
I glance a few times in the rearview mirror, expecting to find Kirk following me.
While I’m distracted by thoughts of Kirk, several cars honk at me again all at once. It takes a moment for me to figure out what’s going on. A shower of panic chills my spine at the sight of an oncoming truck headed straight for me. Teeth clenched and a scream stuck in my throat, I swerve at the last second before we collide. Distracted by my thoughts, I had veered into the wrong lane.
Shaken by the accident I almost caused, I pull up in front of a jewelry store and lean my head against the steering wheel. It’s a terrifying thought to be hit with the realization that life can change in an instant. Months ago, I was happy, fooled into trusting that fate has my back. Then just like that, the rug is yanked from underneath me. Now I feel as though I’m falling without a way to catch myself. Sooner or later, I will hit the ground. The question is, how hard?