by Robin Janney
“I don’t think Angela agrees with you,” mused Craig, deliberately ignoring his friend’s question. He’d helped her up the floor a time or two, but that was about it. And he didn’t know if he could tell Kevin about the conversation last night where they’d both admitted to being ‘maybe’ interested in each other.
“Oh?” Kevin was asking. “What does Angela know about this?”
“She knows I had a nightmare this morning. She called shortly after I woke up from it. Said she’d been up praying and had felt an extra urge to pray for me. Whatever she felt, it had her convinced I was in danger, so she called to check up on me. When I told her about the beast, she said she thought it was a demon because of dreams she used to have. Told me not to believe anything it said.”
“You guys are talking on the phone? Good, good. Did she tell you how to get rid of it in case it appears again?”
“No. She said it wouldn’t do me any good since I’m not a believer.”
Kevin’s sigh was deep. “Yeah, she’s right. You could try, but demons can sense whether you believe what you’re saying. You really do need to believe.”
“Believe? In what?” Anger bubbled in him suddenly. Climbing out of bed as he spoke, he began to pace around his bedroom. “A god who stood by while Veronica raped me? A god who took my mother from me and never let me know her? Where was he when Angela was hurt by whatever happened to her? Where was he when my brother was raping and murdering women? Why should I believe in a god who just stands by and lets his followers get hurt?”
“Because He gave us free will, people do terrible, horrific things to each other. I’m sorry, Craig, I truly am. It’s the best answer I can give you. You’re blaming God for things done to you by human beings. I don’t know why your stepmother did what she did, maybe she’d been abused as a child too. I know that doesn’t help, and I’m sorry.”
He stopped at his bedroom window and pulled the curtain back to look out. It was dark out still, but Craig knew which direction Angela’s apartment building was. This wasn’t the first time he’d stood in this window looking towards her. “Humans suck.”
“Sometimes. But you like some of us anyway.”
“Some of you make it impossible not to. I hope I didn’t offend you.” Craig moved away from the window and sat back down on the edge of his bed.
“Far from it. You’re still hurting, and I understand that.”
“Angela prays for me,” said Craig, unsure of why it was so important to him.
“I’m sure she does. From what you tell me, she sounds like a compassionate woman. If it really is a demon in your dream, then you’re going to need as many believers praying for you as possible. Sherry and I do.”
“You do?” He wasn’t sure why it surprised him. Kevin had been steady in his faith from the first when they’d met as freshmen in college. Never overbearing, but willing to share at the first question.
“We do. I think Jeff and Norm do as well, but we’ve never talked about it. I’m curious, did you tell Angela everything about your dream?”
“Are you kidding? Hell no!” Craig failed to pick up on the teasing in his friend’s voice. “Oh yeah, by the way, Angela – that good part I mentioned, just happens to be you. I can’t see that conversation going well.”
Kevin was laughing. “You never know. She might be flattered to be told you dreamt of making love with her.”
“I never said that.” Sometimes he forgot how well his friend knew him.
“You said enough. How’d you put it? ‘We lay there tangled in each other’s arms’? Yeah, right, maybe afterwards.”
“You’re impossible,” said Craig with embarrassed affection.
“Yes, and you still call.”
“It must be some sort of need to inflict pain on myself,” mused Craig in mock seriousness.
“That would be masochism. Ah, Craig. I sincerely hope one of these days you are going to be brave enough to put the dragon aside to give chase to the angel. I’m using your dream imagery on purpose by the way. You dream about her rescuing you, but you’re still so terrified to let her try.”
“I am,” he admitted. “Kevin, do you ever get tired of talking to me?”
“Only when you don’t listen to reason.”
His friend was teasing him, he heard it this time. “To reason – or to what you’re saying?”
“There’s a difference?”
“Funny.”
“I know. Look, I’m enjoying this but if I don’t switch gears soon I’m going to be late for work.” Papers rustled on the other end.
“Kev, seriously, when are you going to leave that stuffy hospital behind to start your own practice? Then you can be your own boss and the boss is more understanding when you’re late.”
“I’ve thought about it, but now’s not the time to talk about it. I’ll tell you what though,” Kevin said in direct disregard to his own words. “I’ll start my own practice the day you get married.”
“That won’t be any time soon.”
“You know what they say…”
“I know, I know…never say never.”
H igh atop Sawyer’s Peak, the Beast alighted on his favorite spot to stand and ponder events. They had both been so close to the dream realm, it had been easy to poke his nose in. He stretched his wings in the faint light of pre-dawn. He had long since been blocked from Angela’s dreams, but Craig’s dreams were fair game…and besides, it had been fun.
Hope was an addictive drug, and when he reached out to take it away from them…they would both shatter like the fragile humans they were.
14
W ednesday evening arrived before Craig felt truly ready. He and Angela hadn’t had much chance for personal conversation Monday or Tuesday. Angela had teased him a few times about his jealousy from thinking she had been talking about a date, and it made him feel a little better about it. Whichever he Angela had been talking about would probably turn out to be Doc Maynard or her father. Philip did like to stop in occasionally to visit his daughter while she was working, so maybe they had a father-daughter date planned. From the little he’d overheard, the two sounded close.
Despite the cooling autumn evening, Craig sat on the back deck of the store like usual, his sketchbook forgotten in his lap. Instead he watched Princess pace back and forth. They were both listening for the sound of Angela’s car or her voice. At one point he even pointed at his watch and said to the agitated dog, “Give her a few more minutes, Princess. She’s not late yet.”
The groomed dog looked at the human and gave him a soft woof. Her humans were never late. They were quite dependable, but only one was picking on her right now. She had enjoyed playing with them both when they’d bathed and groomed her.
The screen door opened shortly after and David stuck his head out. “Hey boss, Angela just walked in the front door.”
“Thanks.” Craig stood and patted Princess’ head. “See, she’s right on time. She’ll be out soon.”
Princess barked at him again and sat on her haunches.
David grinned, no doubt wanting to ask who’d been watching the clock the closest. “You want me to send her back to your office?”
“Yes.” He wanted to ask his manager who was with Angela but decided not to. He’d let Angela rub his assumptions in, he just hoped he wasn’t going to be too embarrassed. He sat behind his desk, propped his feet up and picked up the newspaper. He’d already read through the Sawyersville Daily, but Angela would have no way of knowing that. Hopefully it looked like he’d been here the entire time, unconcerned about this visit.
There was a knock at the door and he tried to sound casual. “Come in.” He heard the door open and realized too late that the newspaper was upside down. Kevin had laughed at him when he’d shared how this nervous trait had resurfaced. He lowered the paper quickly, hoping she wouldn’t notice. “Angela! Hi!”
Angela came into the office alone, a teasing smirk on her face. “Working hard? Or hardly working?”
�
��Ah, where’s your date?” He lowered his legs and stood, rolling the chair out for her to sit in.
“My day has been just fine, thank you for asking.” She shut the door behind her and crossed to sit in the offered chair. “How’s your day been?”
“Don’t ask. The trucks were late this morning. Flo was over every ten minutes for an hour wanting fresh bread. If I say I’m sorry now, will you just tell me who you brought with you?” He had grabbed the wooden chair and straddled it.
“What do you have to be sorry for? I don’t see any problem with the jealousy you displayed the other night.” She spun the chair around, her eyes laughing at him.
He sighed. He was not jealous. Not anymore, not after all her teasing. God, she was adorable spinning in his chair. “I’m sorry I was angry with you for not changing your plans.”
“Hmm, good enough for now.” She brought the chair to a halt facing him. “My date will be back in a few minutes after he’s done looking over the ice cream case. I told him I wanted to talk to you first.”
His eyebrows rose, but he said nothing.
“I was just wondering if you’d had any more bad dreams.” It sounded like Angela was trying to be as casual as he had been earlier.
“No. I don’t usually dream, but when I do it’s this recurring nightmare. It pops up every so often, but I’ve had it for years. Well, it’s not all nightmarish anymore. There’s a nice part in the middle now. That’s the dream the beast showed up in.”
“And he’s never been in your dream before?”
“No.” He shook his head. “I don’t know why it showed up now.”
Angela shrugged and rubbed her face tiredly. “It could be any number of reasons. Is your dream the same every time?”
“Not exactly. It has the same characters and same basic plot, just different scenarios. Like…one time I’ll die by fire, the next time I’ll drown. It did add a new character recently, and a new plot twist, but that’s the nice part in the middle.” Angela? A new plot twist? That was a safe way to think about it.
“Sounds almost lucid. Have you been questioning your beliefs at all?”
He shrugged. “Some. You said something about having something similar in your dreams before?”
She nodded, and her frame slumped a little. “A few years ago, I underwent about five years of demonic attack in my dreams.”
Her gaze had left him, had dropped. Craig felt a wave of compassion hit him. “You’re only twenty-two.”
“Almost twenty-three,” she said, her chin raising defiantly. “I was almost eleven when they started.”
He wondered if this was the cause of the shadow in her eyes. “Five years,” he whispered, shocked.
“It’s nice to know you’re listening. I’ll keep praying for you.”
He hesitated. She looked so sad, and he didn’t want to disappoint her, but he had little faith in prayer. “I don’t know if it’ll do any good, but go ahead. I mean, it took five years before he left your dreams.”
“No, it didn’t.” She straightened in the chair, a fresh wave of her rose-scented perfume reached him. “Prayer got rid of him immediately. It lasted for five years because I didn’t tell my parents about it until I was sixteen.”
Craig’s heart lurched. Despite his failure in his dreams, he felt an irresistible urge to take Angela in his arms and try to shield her from the world and the demons in it. Was it possible to hug away pain like Grandma Annie had once claimed? He stood, intent on finding out, when there was a knock on the door.
“Is Angela in there?” asked an uncertain male voice with an adolescent crack.
“Your date?” questioned Craig with a raised eyebrow. What bad timing.
Angela gave him a roguish smile. “That would be him. We’ll have to talk some other time.”
“I’d like that,” he admitted. And for reasons which had nothing to do with his crazy dreams.
She left his chair and walked to the door. “Ready to see who I passed work up for?”
“Is that all you passed up?” asked Craig, more serious than he dared admit.
Angela laughed, her mood lightening once again. “Still jealous? Don’t be…” She opened the door. “Come in, Jared.”
Craig’s jaw dropped when Jared Carman walked in. “Little young for you, isn’t he?”
Angela’s laughter rang out again, and she pulled her brother deeper into the office, so she could shut the door. “Jared, this is my boss Craig Moore. Craig, this is my younger brother.”
He managed to regain his composure as he reached out and shook the young man’s hand. “Even if I hadn’t seen you around with your parents, I’d be able to tell you’re related. I can see the family resemblance; you both have red in your hair.”
“I do not have red in my hair!” Angela stomped her foot.
Jared laughed at Craig’s look of surprise. “Don’t worry, Mr. Moore. She always says that. She almost always stomps her foot too.”
“I see.” Craig glanced at Angela, amused and letting her see it. It seemed to just make her more furious. He looked back to the boy. “You can call me Craig, Jared. I don’t mind. So, tell me – what are the two of you up to tonight?”
“Well, we’ve already had our supper. Angela makes some pretty good homemade pizza. When we’re done here, we’re going to watch Air Force One and have cake and ice cream.”
It didn’t sound like a big deal to Craig, but he didn’t say so. He could clearly see the adoration on young Jared’s face when the boy looked up at his older sister, which wasn’t that far of a distance. The youth clearly worshipped his sister and wasn’t afraid to show it. Craig envied the boy for his freedom of expression. “Sounds like fun,” he told the boy.
“You want to come?” the boy asked without hesitation.
Craig raised an eyebrow and looked at Angela who was blushing and most definitely not looking at him. “It’s nice of you to invite me, Jared, but did you get your sister’s permission to invite me to her place?”
Jared’s face fell as he realized his mistake. “No. Sorry, Angela. Is it okay if Craig comes too?”
“I thought you said you wanted to spend time with me?” she asked her brother.
The boy shrugged, and Angela sighed.
She looked up at him with an abashed smile on her face. “It won’t do much for my sisterly ego, but you’re welcome to come and join us.”
“I’m tempted,” Craig replied truthfully. He’d watched their entire exchange and decided the siblings were probably close enough to do anything for each other. Like he and Tim used to be. “But I think I’ll pass this time. I wouldn’t want to intrude. I have a brother, so I know what it’s like. Have you been out to see Princess yet?”
He knew she hadn’t, but it felt like a good time to divert her attention. Before he changed his mind about the boy’s invitation.
“Not yet,” replied Angela, uncertainty playing across her face.
“Better go then. The last I saw she was on the back deck waiting patiently.”
“I better not keep her waiting then. See you tomorrow. Come on Jared.”
“Goodnight,” said Craig as they opened his office door and left. He stopped Angela from shutting the door but didn’t watch them walk away. Instead he waited a minute and then followed. He smiled at Becky as he entered the deli. She gave him a nod and then ignored him.
The inside door was open, a coolness wafting in. Angela had taken the dog off the deck into the parking lot and had the dog dancing and jumping for treats. Her laughter rang in the air, music to his ears. He was barely aware of Jared and therefore didn’t notice the youth’s inquisitive eyes on him. The sound of the teens skateboarding behind them didn’t even register.
In that instant, Craig realized Angela would always be in his life. He didn’t know how exactly, he just knew that she would be. She would be there whenever he needed her, he’d just have to say the word. She’d always be willing to listen and lend a helping hand. Angela would be there in ways she’d neve
r even understand. In her smile, in her laughter, in the way she put him at ease even at the same time she set him on his toes. It was a bit frightening for him to realize that if things continued as they were, she’d soon become a closer friend than Kevin.
Unsettled by this revelation, Craig turned and walked away. He couldn’t understand how this revelation brought as much comfort as it did trepidation. He cemented the revelation by deciding not to share this with Kevin. He would deal with it, or not deal with it, on his own.
O n the way back to her apartment, Angela was only listening to her brother with half an ear as he chattered away about everything from the moon phase to Princess…to Craig?
“Excuse me, what was that?” she asked as they reached her apartment building and climbed the wooden steps up to her apartment. Maggie was heading down the steps at the same time. “Hi Maggie!”
“Hi Ange!” her neighbor said. “Jared! Have fun tonight!”
“You too! Now, again Jared?”
“I said…You like Craig, don’t you?” repeated Jared with impatience. He opened the apartment door for his sister who carried the bag of groceries she’d purchased.
Angela decided not to play dumb with her brother. Sometimes the ten years which separated them didn’t exist. He could be very grown up and mature when he was in the mood, and apparently, he was tonight. Smiling she flipped on the light and began unpacking their goodies. Hadn’t she left the light above the sink on? She turned it back on without showing the flash of irritation she felt. “Yes, I do. He’s a nice man, and he’s becoming a good friend. You aren’t jealous, are you?”
Jared laughed, making sure the door was latched. “No! At least he’s nicer than the boys Cassie likes to go out with.”
“Oh?” she asked innocently. She knew far better than her brother the kind of boys their sister dated, but she wanted to hear his perspective.
