“I told Chrissy.”
Her feet freeze in the doorway from our living room to our kitchen and she yanks my arm.
“What?”
I twist around and give her my undivided attention, figuring I probably should have talked to her about that. “Chrissy helped me last year. She’s one of the people who dragged me up from the bottom of the shit storm. I couldn’t keep it from her and I knew she’d understand if I told her straight.”
“She’s okay with it?” Relief floods her face.
“Yeah.” I watch her shoulders deflate.
“Oh, good. I didn’t want her to hate me, you know? She’s a good friend.” A small smile forms on her face and I’m thankful I didn’t fuck this up before it even started.
“That she is.” I glance to the door and back to her. “Let’s get out of here.”
She nods and I lead us on our date. I lock the door and she waits behind me like this isn’t her house, too. When we get to the Mustang, she stays back, allowing me to open the door for her. By the time I climb in myself and move to insert the key into the ignition, she’s twisted my way. When my eyes dart to her, her head bolts to the side.
“What?”
She’s releases a short breath. “What did you mean about give it to her straight?” She studies me with confused eyes. “I mean, like that we’re just starting out and it’s no big deal, or—”
“Or?”
Her eyes flash down to my stick shift and she swallows deep.
“Paige.” I wait for her to focus back on me. She doesn’t grant me her hurt eyes that she wants more out of this than she believes I’m ready to give. Placing my finger under her chin, I guide it up so she can see how truthful I am in this moment. That there’s no stopping until she wakes up one day and breaks my heart. I’ll swap the pain for only snippets of memories with her forever. “I told her I like you. That I wanted to go on a date.” Her chin trembles, but she recovers fast. “This isn’t about fucking you, Paige. I thought that was clear in my bed this afternoon?”
She nods. “You did. I’m sorry.” Straightening her back, she spins in her seat, focusing on the garage wall.
“Baby?” I try to grab her attention, but she shakes her head as though she wants to will the tears in her eyes away.
“No, Rob. You shouldn’t have to constantly claim your feelings for me. Remember those demons I told you that haunt me? Well, it’s trust that a guy can actually love a woman for an extended period of time, if at all.”
I reach over and squeeze her hand. “I’ll prove you wrong.”
Her head whips to me and the tears that were brimming now trickle down her cheeks. “You don’t have to. This is my issue to overcome,” she argues, but I shake my head.
“I’ll prove it. Believe me, Paige, you’ll be the one breaking me.” I start the car unable to continue this conversation about the peace I’ve already made with myself that I’m undeserving of her and one day she’ll wake up like Sleeping Beauty, to her real prince.
She professes nothing, letting my promise linger in the small confines of my car. This isn’t the laughing and smiling date I assumed we’d have, but if she needs reassurances from me, I’ll hand them over. What do I have to lose? She’s already broken me. She flicked the last chip stuck on my shoulder off. Unleashed me from the pain that’s occupied my heart for so long. That’s why I’ll grab whatever she gives me and never ask for more.
Once I follow the signs for the freeway, she faces me again. “Enough demons, where are you taking me today?” Her voice much happier than a few minutes ago. Another reason I’m falling for her. She never allows anything bad to occupy her mind for long.
“Rock N Roll Museum.” She chokes on the sip of water she helped herself to in my center console. Although, I didn’t think we were at that point, I love that she did. “Is that okay?” I ask her, reaching over for the open bottle in her hands.
“Of course.” There’s a hint of doubt in her voice, but I’ll assume it’s from the talk before we left.
“I just figured you’re always listening to all that classic rock. It should be right up your alley.” She nods, but uncomfortable to say the least.
“Yes.” Who is this chick? Not the Paige I know.
“Have you ever been there? If you don’t want to go?” I try to hide the dryness in my throat that I picked wrong.
“No.” She reaches across and squeezes my knee with her hand. “It’s perfect.” Too bad when I glance over that gorgeous smile doesn’t lift her cheeks.
MY STOMACH HAS never churned as much as it has this thirty-minute trip to Cleveland. Have I ever been there? Hell, I was there for the damn induction of my dad’s band, The Raptures. Rob’s lucky I didn’t spit the water all over his lap when he answered with the Rock N Roll Hall of Fame. Maybe then he would have spun this car around and back into the safety of our garage.
As we exit the freeway and begin to weave the streets of downtown, I pinpoint in my head the exact location The Raptures are at in the museum. I need to stay fucking clear of that area because of that one damn picture everyone loves so much. As though I was The Raptures’ damn mascot, it’s well known. I’m actually surprised Rob hasn’t figured it out; he saw the picture of me twirling around in my princess dress. It’s the same dress with me in it on the cover of their most popular album. The picture is distorted to appear faded and ripped, but it’s me. I’m nauseated the more I think about him finding out who my dad is.
“You okay?” he asks, concern etched in his eyes.
I plaster on the fake smile. “Yeah.” Rob sees through my mask but doesn’t call me on it.
Shit. I suck in another breath. Rob’s eyes have veered over my way too many times since we’ve started this date. Maybe I should spout it out right now. Tell him so he doesn’t think I deliberately kept a secret from him. But I did. Why? Because I’m too damn scared he’ll be with me for that sole reason. The usual instant best friendships I usually get when people find out who my dad is, is bad enough. Take into account Rob is a guitarist that’s contemplating making music his career and it only compounds the reality. If Rob finds out my dad is Greg Thompson, I might never know if he truly loves me.
“Here we are.” Rob passes by, driving into the parking garage.
He shuts the engine off and I move to grab the handle of the car door, but his hand on my thigh stops me.
“Are you sure you want to go? You seem weird since I brought it up.” How could anyone believe this man sitting across from me didn’t care for other people? His loving and adoring blue hues speak volumes. His nonverbal is so much louder than his mouth.
“Yes. I’m excited.” I smile and then open the door to the car.
When we meet up behind the car, he links his fingers with mine. “I would have liked to open your door.” He knocks his shoulder with mine and I smile.
“Sorry, force of habit I guess.” When I don’t toss a snarky comment back, he stops me in front of the elevators.
“Talk to me.” He jerks my hand and I sigh.
“I have to tell you something, but can it wait until we’re in there?”
He tilts his head in confusion. “Take your time, Paige. I’m not going to rush you.”
Seriously, he’s so sweet. My lips lift because he’s wrong, I could never break him, which hopefully means we’re stuck together.
“I want it all out there, Rob. You’ve told me everything, and it’s time I do, too.”
He frowns slightly, as though he’s offended that I haven’t been as honest as he presumed. Then he smiles and the elevator dings for us. The air stiffens around us as the elevator descends down. Before my crazy behavior, I imagine Rob would have pinned me up against this wall, maybe eased between my legs as he thoroughly kissed me.
Although there’s no choice, he has to know who my father is and whatever happens happens. I’ve learned the tell-tale signs that people want to hang around me solely because of my dad. If he asks me to have dinner with my dad, or see his h
ouse right after, it’s time I high tail it out of this relationship. When people start caring more about my dad and what he has to offer and less about me, I have no choice but to crush the relationship.
Rob pays for me and hands me my ticket after. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
His hand rests on the small of my back as we navigate through the lobby. His calloused fingers scorch my skin when they inch up my shirt to expose my back. With Rob, there’s always an undying want resonating underneath and it scares me that this relationship could be more physical for him. Whereas, for me I’m just as invested emotionally. He’s the one, and if he passes the test to who my dad is, then you might as well put a ring on my finger and call me Mrs. Winters. It scares the crap out of me though and I’m not sure love is supposed to entice that feeling.
Rob doesn’t ask me anymore about what I want to tell him, and I figure I’ll wait until we reach the second floor where The Raptures dedication is laid out.
We read facts about the musicians and he adds small tidbits that he’s heard or read other places. His knowledge of musicians surpasses me by a mile. Which only speaks volumes about what he decides in the war inside of himself—school or music. I’d be lying if I didn’t secretly hope for school, but it’s not my choice.
“Oh man, Paige, you’ve got to see this.” He drags me over to the latest inductees. “Did you know Green Day got inducted? How did I miss this?” He’s like a kid in a toy store, skipping from exhibit to exhibit, scouring for more facts to digest.
“No, I didn’t. That’s awesome,” I comment, monitoring how empty the museum is becoming. We got here late, too late to see the whole thing, but I’m more than okay with that.
“Could you imagine, Paige, seeing your face in here someday? That you made something of yourself.”
Yeah I could. Right upstairs as a matter of fact.
“It doesn’t make them better than others.” My voice is too angry to not cause alarm to him.
“Sorry, babe, I disagree. These are the top musicians ever.” He doesn’t give me more than a glance before his eyes are glued to Ringo Starr’s area.
“Yes I agree with that, but they’re just average people.”
He scuffs, “Average people who make millions and perform in packed arenas.”
My heart clenches in my chest and I close my eyes, willing the tears to stop that are about to fall. I tell my heart, we knew this wasn’t it, who really finds a gem under an asshole? It’s what romance books are made of, not real life.
“I hoped you’d be more excited.” He picks up his head and wraps his arm around my waist. His face nuzzles into my neck and goose bumps erupt under my ear. “You just want to get me home and have your way with me,” he whispers sending a chill over my skin.
I give him a tight smile that doesn’t appease him. “What’s up?” He backs away from me and I grab his hand.
“It’s time.”
Rip it off, Paige.
I drag him up to the staircase to climb it. “Are you sure you haven’t been here before? It’s either that or you’re like a Navy Seal who researches ins and outs before they enter.” He laughs. I don’t, tugging him up the stairs. “If you wanted to sneak me into a closet or something, you know I’m game.”
He rambles like always, a defense mechanism, I remind myself. Two things I’ve learned from Rob. He hates silence and he hates not being in control.
We reach the second floor and I drag him over to The Raptures section. There’s the picture, he’ll know when he sees it and I won’t have to confess anything. All the tidbits of information should link together and he’ll stare at me in awe.
Nope.
“Oh, I love The Raptures, one of my favorite bands.” His eyes scan the bio of each member. I wait patiently for him to find it. The picture of me twirling on stage with them, in the same pink dress at Disneyworld he saw.
Nervously, I bite my lip and lean against the railing that overlooks the lobby and up to the other floors.
“Oh, shit.”
I release a breath, he found it. Now I just wait until that miraculous brain syncs into rhythm and he figures out I’m Greg Thompson’s daughter.
“I know.” I step up to meet him and grab his hand.
Keeping it mine, he studies the plaque in front of him. “You knew Will Nichols died? I guess just a week ago.” His lips slope and I can’t hold my sadness back.
Hot, plump tears cascade down my cheeks. “What?” I inch closer, releasing his hand. There it is; a plaque in honor of Will Nichols, the original lead singer. His born date and his death date on the same line. Only forty-nine years old.
“Paige.” Rob wraps his arm around me and brings me into him. “I didn’t know you were such a fan. I mean I’ve heard you play their music, but you’re a diehard fan of The Raptures?”
His body warms me and his arms soothe me. I want to be selfish and not tell him what’s behind his back. Not change our relationship to me being a celebrity kid. Me being related to someone he’s probably aspired to be. Or it might just be the connections I can give him to make a break into the music industry. Regardless, the minute he finds out my legal name is Paige Thompson, things will change; it’s inevitable.
“What’s inevitable?” He steps back, his hands cupping my cheeks.
Shit, did I say that out loud?
“What?”
“You said ‘it’s inevitable.’ What is?” Curiosity is written all over his face and now is the time. Rip it, Paige. Rip the fucking Band-aid off. My whole body fights with my mind, not to ruin this one thing I’ve granted for myself these past months.
“Um . . .” I clear my throat. “I’m . . .” I stare up at the ceiling and then back down to his blue eyes. He has no idea what I’m about to tell him.
“Paige?” My dad’s loud voice rings out over the floors.
My head whips and he’s stepping off the elevator with two bodyguards on either side of him. I step back away from Rob, whose eyes are so wide I fear they’ll spring out, dangling down like in the old cartoons.
Rob shifts his focus to me and then back to my dad, who’s followed by Len and Hank. “Holy shit,” he whispers and then tugs me to his side. “Look baby, I know you’re upset about Will, but damn, The Raptures are coming right to you.”
I’m guessing Rob missed the fact when my dad called out my name. My lips curl from Rob’s star-struck eyes, even if it’s a knife in my gut at the same time. He should be thrilled a band he loves is striding toward him right now.
“What are you doing here?” My dad steps up and hugs me, kissing my cheek.
“What the—” Rob’s behind me, and I’m hoping he may see the family resemblance so I don’t have to spit it out.
“Why didn’t you call me about Will?” I bury my head in my dad’s chest, sniffing his cigarettes and whiskey mix cologne. More tears pour from my eyes. I may not have been close to him recently, but back then I was. He is my God Father.
“Oh, sweetie.” He smoothes down my untamed hair and leads my chin with his finger to meet his eyes. “He was in a bad spot. I planned to make a trip down to you, buy you lunch and break the news. But I got hung up with the tour. No harm in making a big deal of it.”
“Big deal? He was your best friend.” How could my dad be so careless about his friendships? He should cherish the ones he made before the fame.
“He was—fifteen years ago. We had our differences, he couldn’t get clean. He overdosed, sweetheart. It hurts me too, but I wasn’t going to disrupt your college on it. You haven’t seen him in years. I’m sorry though.” He swipes the tears from my eyes. “I should have called you.”
“Yes, you should have.” I pout like I’m still the six year old in the picture.
“Paigey.” Len comes alongside of my dad and I hear Rob release a short breath.
Hank follows shortly after and my eyes veer to Rob. Swarmed with the men who love me for me, I stare at the one I secretly hope does.
�
��Rob.” I stop, gaining a stronger voice. “This is my dad, Greg Thompson.” I point to my right. “This is Len and Hank.” I lean forward to point at each one.
“The Raptures?” he questions, gulping down what I assume is a lump in his throat. His brain starts working and I see it all linking together as a small smile begins to form on his mouth. “You’re her.”
I nod my head, remaining in the arms of my dad.
“Who is this, Paige?” my dad’s deep voice asks.
I step away, wanting to present Rob the correct way to my dad.
When I stop in front of Rob, I mouth I’m sorry and he only smiles, grabbing my hand in his.
“Dad, this is Rob Winters.”
Rob releases my hand and holds it out to dad. “You’re the boyfriend?” my dad asks, leaving Rob’s hand midair, waiting.
“Yes, sir,” Rob confirms and the tear that just spilled from my eye wasn’t for Will.
“Hi, Rob, I’m Len.” I swear I see a shudder shake through Rob’s chest as his hand meets Len’s.
“I’m Hank.”
I smile at the men welcoming Rob as my dad’s eyes are on me, watching the scene unfold. Nonverbal questions if this is the guy I talked about when I escaped to his house. I nod and his lips purse.
“What’s your major?” My dad asks him and I fear we’re about to have that whole, music is good for me, but my baby girl isn’t going to be sidestepped moment. Even if he’s treated women like shit his whole life.
Rob finally drops is hand. “Business, sir. I had dropped out, but I’m planning on going back.”
“Really?” I can’t stop the question from leaving my lips.
He turns to me, a smile on his face. “Yeah, I planned to tell you tonight at dinner.”
“That’s awesome.” I wrap my arms around his shoulders.
“Maybe we shouldn’t show too much affection in front of your dad. I don’t think he likes me,” he whispers in my ear and I unhook my arms.
“Dad.” My voice is stern and I raise my eyebrows at him.
“It’s nice to meet you, Rob.” My dad holds his hand out to Rob.
“Believe me, the pleasure is all mine.” Rob and my dad shake hands, but Rob steps right back in line with me. Then he surprises me more than he has in the months past. “Show me the picture of you.”
Let Me Go Page 21
