She says nothing for a second or two, she just looks at me with those wide eyes, her expression almost impassive. “Does it bother you? The fact I let him sleep with me?”
That question takes me slightly by surprise, and I can’t help the small, almost nervous laugh that escapes. “I… No. No, I… I don’t know...” I’m not altogether sure I meant to say that out loud but it’s out there now. I said it. “No, Skye.”
Her eyes remain locked on mine, and I feel a small trickle of sweat start to run down my back, but it’s hot out there today. The heat’s intense.
“I’m not some cheap club mama, Gabriel. I was brought up in a chapter ran by my father, so that kind of shit couldn’t happen with me. It didn’t need to. I had no reason to sleep my way into the club, I was born into it. So I’m not some cheap whore. What happened last night… I don’t know. I think it was a knee-jerk reaction, a release. I needed a few minutes of escape. We both did.”
“He stayed over. Did you have sex again?”
She drops her gaze, and I’m taking that as a yes.
“Don’t do it again, Skye. Please. It’s way too risky, sweetheart. Pull back…”
“That could cause him to lose that little bit of trust he’s starting to build up in me.”
“He isn’t one of them. Remember? He doesn’t see you like those other men see you, he used to be a fucking lawyer. You tell him sex is off the menu, he’ll take that.”
“You reckon?”
“He’ll take it. He’ll be fine with it. You don’t need to fuck him to get the information, we’re already seeing that. Be his friend, keep him company, but that’s all. That’s all.”
She narrows her eyes as she stares me down and I feel that trickle of sweat start to run faster down my spine. “What about you, though, huh? What about you, Gabriel?”
I walk right up to her and I reach out and gently touch the tiny pendant around her neck, and all the time her eyes stay fixed on mine. The “wire” she’s wearing, it’s not live right now. No one’s listening in to this, nothing’s being recorded, I’ve already taken the thumb drive out. Our meetings, they’re private.
“This shit ends now, Skye. I know we asked you to do anything you had to, anything you felt you needed to do in order to get us the information we need, but embarking on any kind of relationship… that could be suicide. For all of us.”
“But especially for me, huh?”
“You start feeling anything for these people, and you start to become weak. You leave yourself wide open, vulnerable; you put yourself in danger.”
“Who said I felt anything for him? I don’t…”
“Not now, maybe. But believe me, Skye, this shit can hit you like a bolt from the blue, slamming into you when you really aren’t looking and it can…” I trail off, and I drop my gaze and turn away from her but I know her eyes are still on me. I can feel her stare burning into the back of my neck.
“Who we talking about here, Gabriel? Me, or you?”
I take a deep breath, wait a couple of seconds, and then I turn and walk back over to her. “Come on. We need to get you back.”
I turn away and walk out of the barn, back over to the car.
“You got something on your mind, Agent Franks?”
“Get in the car, Skye.”
She doesn’t. She rests her arms on the roof and she stares at me. “I need to be a good girl, huh?”
I lock eyes with her for a couple of long beats before I open the door and get in the car.
Yeah. She needs to be a good girl.
She needs to be fucking good.
Skye
That was probably the strangest meeting I’ve had yet with Gabriel. Special Agent Franks. Every time I see him it’s like he’s becoming more uptight, that professional image he likes to put out there, it’s beginning to show a couple of cracks.
“Why, if it ain’t our pretty new princess.”
I turn to see Cole Rockwell approach, and I lean back against the pool table, gripping the edges tight. “Considering this isn’t your clubhouse you’re around here a lot at the minute.”
“Man, I could listen to that accent all day long,” he drawls as he moves an inch or two closer to me, and he smirks, and I feel my stomach churn. He smells of whiskey and stale cigarette smoke and I don’t want him this close to me. “And the reason I’m here so often, darlin’, that ain’t none of your concern. Me and the president here, we got some business going on, is all.”
“Business?” I raise an eyebrow and I hold his gaze because I know what he’s trying to do. He thinks I’m nothing but new meat, a piece of fresh flesh for him to take, even though I’m not on his turf. He thinks all us club girls – especially the new ones – he thinks we’re all fair game. Some might be. Some may find his power an attraction and forgive the fact he’s a cold, lecherous creep. I don’t. And yes, I’ve been told to try and get close to this man, too, but I don’t think I need to. I think Theo is all I need. “Must be important, if you’re here so often.”
He laughs, and it’s a sound that makes my skin crawl. And when he reaches out and trails his fingers across my cheek, down over my neck and across my collarbone, it’s all I can do not to physically gag.
“Yeah. I like you, darlin’. You got a mouth on you, ain’t no doubt about that, but maybe that mouth of yours could be put to good use some time, hmm? You ain’t gonna be giving me no smart remarks with my cock rammed down your pretty little throat now, are you?”
I grab his wrist and yank his hand away from me, and his face once more breaks into a slow smirk, his dark eyes boring deep into mine. “Fuck you!”
He laughs again, a low, almost menacing sound that once more turns my stomach, and then he walks away, across the clubhouse, down the hall that leads to the chapel. And I watch him go, allowing a small sigh of relief to escape. I don’t like that man, I don’t feel comfortable around him. But I’m not going to let him unsettle me. I’ve been around men like him before, I can handle him. So I quickly compose myself, and I remember the reason why Cole’s here. He’s here to see Mack. And then I remember that it isn’t only Mack who’s there in the chapel, I saw Theo go in there a few minutes ago. Which means all three of them are together now, in one room. And I’m here. They’re all together, and I’m right here.
I wait until I’m sure Cole’s gone inside before I make a snap decision to take a risk I probably shouldn’t take, but I might just hear something, if I get close enough. It might not be loud enough to be picked up by the “wire” I’m wearing, but if I can just grab any piece of information I can…
I start to head down that hallway, half of me grateful that the clubhouse is quiet this afternoon, half of me wishing it was busier. In case something goes wrong? In case I’m found out trying to listen in? I want this job done just as quickly as Gabriel does, so what the hell. I’m taking the risk.
I stop just outside the chapel door. It’s a thick, solid wooden door, and I lean in close to it, to see whether I can actually hear anything through it at all. And at first I can’t. All I can hear are muffled voices, I can’t make anything out. Maybe this was a bad idea, but just as I make to pull away Cole’s voice comes over a little louder, which tells me he’s probably close to the door now, and that starts my heart beating so fast and so loud it’s almost drowning him out.
“You got a date now, son?”
“I spoke to Dom this morning. He says they’re moving him Thursday night.”
“You got a time?”
Cole coughs, and I miss Theo’s reply, and I close my eyes as something suddenly starts to make sense. Pieces start to fall into place now. And then I hear Mack’s voice grow louder as he moves nearer to the door, and my heart isn’t giving up that frantic beating, my stomach isn’t quitting with the nerves and the nausea.
“We need to get shit moving, Cole. You need to get your contacts brought up to speed…”
His voice trails off as he moves away, and I hurriedly get out of there as I hear more people
come into the clubhouse, I think I’ve heard enough for now.
I head outside, I need some air, and I cross the compound to the patch of grass and the small playground that’s been built for the club’s kids. For some reason it feels like a safe place to be right now. I sit down on the grass, pull my knees to my chest and fish the phone Gabriel gave me from my pocket, find his number on speed dial and press call. And the second I hear his voice I breathe another sigh of relief.
“Skye? Everything all right? Where are you?”
“I’m at the clubhouse.”
“Jesus, Skye, you’re calling me from the fucking clubhouse?”
“I need to see you. Now. Gabriel, I heard something…”
“OK. OK, I don’t need you to say anything else. I’ll meet you in a little while. I’ve got some things to do first….”
“Y’know, I’ve got information and you’re telling me I’ve got to fucking wait?”
“What do you want me to do, Skye? Come pick you up from the compound? Does this information hint at anything about to happen right now?”
“No.”
“Then I’ll see you in a couple of hours. As planned.”
I hang up and shove the phone into the back pocket of my jeans, resting my chin on my knees as I stare out across the compound. It’s pretty much business as usual today. Or what I’ve grown to know as usual, for this club. A few brothers are over in the small workshop working on some bikes while a couple of the club girls watch and laugh and flirt. Izzi’s with her kids hanging out by the office, chatting with another of the old ladies, and when she sees me she smiles and waves but she doesn’t come over, and I’m grateful for that. I’m not really in the mood for small talk right now. I like Izzi, and I know Gabriel told me to befriend her, I just don’t think I need to get too close to her, either. I’m starting to get a lot of stuff I need without too much effort, and I hope it stays that way. The sooner this is done, the sooner I can leave here and start that new life. Whatever the hell it turns out to be.
“Hey. I’ve been looking for you.”
Theo hands me a foil package and lowers himself down beside me. “What’s that?”
“A burger. They’re cooking some up in the kitchen for the barbecue later, but I managed to wangle a couple for us now. I guess this cute smile and pretty awesome face can twist any girl round their finger, huh?”
He winks, and I laugh, and I unwrap the burger and bite into it. “Oh, that is good!”
“Yeah. Not bad, huh?” He takes another bite of his own burger, then turns his head to look at me. “You all right?”
“You keep asking me that.”
“Because I care about you.”
I look down the second he says that, and he also averts his gaze, because we know we can’t care about anything. Least of all each other. We both know we’re lying, to each other. We just don’t know each others’ reasons for doing so.
“I’m not gonna be around tonight, Theo.”
I don’t look at him, but I know he’s looking at me now. I can feel his eyes on me, but I keep my gaze focused straight ahead.
“Oh. That’s a shame. I was kinda hoping we could hang out again.”
I close my eyes, just for a second, and then I open them and turn to face him, and I smile. He makes me want to smile, he has a kind face. A face that doesn’t belong here. “Look, I’ve got a little bit of time, before I have to leave, so… Want to go grab a drink?”
He pulls himself to his feet and holds out his hand, and I take it, letting him pull me up, too.
I’m not meeting Gabriel for a couple of hours.
I might as well use that time wisely.
Theo
Yeah, I’m disappointed. I was looking forward to spending another evening with her, even if it was just gonna be hanging out here at another club barbecue. They have a lot of those round here. Back in my lawyer days – my other life – I was lucky if I experienced a barbecue more than a couple of times a year.
I watch her as she takes a long draft of beer, and she notices me do that, and she smirks.
“You never seen a woman down beer before?”
“Not on a regular basis, no.”
“I never said I was particularly ladylike.”
I laugh quietly and take a sip of my own beer. “You really came all the way here to New Mexico on your own?”
She raises an eyebrow and I think she’s throwing me what I can only describe as a withering look.
“Because women shouldn’t be doing that kind of thing, right? Traveling alone…” she lets out a low whistle and sits back in her seat. “We just aren’t supposed to do that.”
I smile, and I start to twist my beer bottle round and round between my fingers, she’s actually making me feel a little nervous now. “I didn’t mean it that way.”
“I know. I’m just messing with you. But I’m a big girl, Theo. I can handle myself, believe me.”
I look up, and my eyes lock on hers, and another wave of disappointment at not being able to spend time with her tonight floods me. And then I immediately try to batter that away because it shouldn’t bother me, that she won’t be around for a few hours.
“Hey. You’re doing it again.”
Her voice pulls me back from my thoughts and I look at her, blinking rapidly a few times as I try to regain my focus. “Sorry… what?”
“Drifting off. Wherever you go to it must be one hell of a place, because you go there a lot. Is my company that utterly mind-numbing that you have to escape some place else?”
“No. Believe me, Skye, it’s not that…” I stop talking, because sometimes she makes me feel so comfortable I just want to tell her everything, all the shit that’s fucking with my head right now. But Mack, he told me to keep my mouth shut, we tell no one who doesn’t need to know. And the old ladies, the club girls, they’re not privy to this job. Not yet. Not until they need to be.
“So, what is it, then?” She reaches for my hand, but she doesn’t take it, she just runs her fingertips over my knuckles in a way that actually causes me to break out in goose bumps. “If you need to talk, Theo, you can talk to me. I won’t judge, I won’t tell a soul, whatever it is you feel you can share…”
“I’m fine, Skye. Really.”
She smiles, and her fingers are still touching my hand, and I feel that weight that’s been there on my shoulders weigh heavier than it ever has done before.
“OK. If you’re sure…”
She pulls her hand away and drains the last of her beer before she checks her watch and hauls herself to her feet.
“I’d better get going. I have to be somewhere…”
“My brother. He’s in prison.”
She looks at me, and she sits back down, her eyes fixed on mine. “Look, Theo, you really don’t have to…”
“Can I trust you, Skye? I mean, I really need to trust you.”
She holds my gaze and she reaches for my hand again, her fingers sliding between mine.
I look down at our joined hands. “I need to be able to trust you.” I raise my gaze and she’s still looking at me, right into my eyes, and I know I shouldn’t be doing this, I shouldn’t be saying anything, Mack would fucking kill me. But keeping it locked inside – that’s killing me, too. I need to get at least some of this out.
“You can trust me, Theo.”
I keep looking into her eyes; I need to believe her. “He’s in prison because of me.”
Her fingers tighten around mine but her gaze doesn’t waver.
“I killed a man, Skye. And I didn’t mean to, I swear to God…” I drop my head and I pull back my hand, I’ve said too much. I need to go now. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be putting this on you…”
“He took the blame. Right?”
I look at her, and then I drop my head again. “I hated the people he hung around with.” I rake my fingers through my hair, and I still don’t know if I should be telling her this; if I should be telling her anything, but I think it’s too late now, to
stop. “He loved all this shit. I mean, he never actually became a fully fledged club member or anything, but he knew a lot of bikers; was always hanging out at their clubhouses. And I could never understand that; why he got off on all the bad shit, all the risks and the danger…”
“This man you killed, Theo. Was he a biker?”
“No. No, he wasn’t. I don’t know who he was, just some scumbag piece of shit who…” I stop talking and take a deep breath. I need to stop, I can’t tell her any more. I can’t tell her who I used to be, I don’t want to go there, revisiting him kills me. Because I can’t go back. And I want to. I fucking want to, so fucking bad. “Me and Dom, we were like chalk and cheese, y’know?” I squeeze her hand but I keep my eyes down. “He was always the rebel, the one who got into trouble, dropped out of school; brought shame on the family. I was the one who was given the responsibility of pulling the family’s reputation out of the gutter, as my father put it. I was the one who studied hard, made my parents so fucking proud when I got a place at law school…” I take another deep breath, because I’m going there, even though it’s the last place I want to go. “I’m a lawyer, Skye. A corporate lawyer with a prestigious firm and… I was a lawyer.” I slowly raise my gaze and my eyes finally lock back on hers. “Until that night. The night I made one, stupid mistake.”
“You really don’t have to do this, Theo.”
I think I do, now. I really think I do. “I mean, I love my brother, don’t get me wrong, but socializing with him? No. We didn’t mix in the same circles, didn’t know the same people, we were so fucking far apart on that score… and I still don’t know why the hell I went to that party, I just… it was Dom’s birthday. His fortieth. And he wanted me there, and Kelly she…”
“Kelly?”
Once more I drop my gaze and focus on Skye’s hand still holding tightly onto mine. “She was my fiancée.”
“Was?”
I leave a few beats before I speak again. This is somewhere I really don’t want to go now. “She said we should go because… because Dom he… he was begging me, y’know? Begging me to spend some time with him, but I was just… I didn’t really want to go, but I let her talk me into it. And I missed him, sometimes. Dom. I missed him.” I drag a hand back through my hair and take a long, deep breath. “So we went. And at first it was OK, it just seemed like your average house party. And I was never a huge fan of the friends Dom seemed to be mixing with back then but, the ones that were there that night, they seemed all right. Most of them. But this one guy… I came back from the bathroom, and I couldn’t find Kelly anywhere, so I went outside to look for Dom, to see if he knew where she was. He said he thought he’d seen her go round the back of the house, and I just assumed she was going for a cigarette, that she was trying to make sure I didn’t catch her ‘cause she kept telling me she was really going to quit this time. She just couldn’t stick to that promise…” I trail off for a couple of beats, my eyes still focused on Skye’s hand holding mine. “But then we… we heard a scream, raised voices, and me and Dom, we ran around the back of the house and… this guy, he had her dress up around her waist, and he had his fingers inside her and… and she was fucking screaming, Skye. She was screaming at him to stop, and he wouldn’t, he didn’t, even when he saw us he just kept going. And Dom, he tried to pull him off her but I just saw red, y’know? So when I saw the gun sticking out of Dom’s pocket I just grabbed it, and I fucking fired it, straight at that bastard’s head…”
Bound (Soldiers of Darkness MC Book 3) Page 7
