It was difficult to interpret the look in her eyes. His gut instinct told him she was just as attracted to him as he was to her, but he didn’t trust his own inflamed emotions. She could merely be surprised at his generosity or his being so careful. She could be thankful he considered her safety as important as his own. It could simply be the way she looked at everybody. They’d known each other for less than a day. Why should she feel any different about him than she would any other stranger?
And what accounted for his attraction to her? Was it that faint accent that sounded intriguingly foreign, the hair so blond it looked silver in the moonlight, or those eyes so blue they reminded him of the Texas sky on a spring day? Such a woman ought to be the creation of some artist, his version of the perfect woman, captured on a canvas and hung in a museum for everyone to admire. But Suzette was flesh and blood, warm and smiling, and she was here—alone with him.
His mind went blank.
He watched, fascinated, as she raised the canteen, opened her mouth, and lifted it to her lips. He could feel the breath catch in his throat when her lips closed around the mouth of the canteen. They were so warm, so full, so moist, he could practically feel them on his own mouth. He took a deep breath, moistened his lips with his tongue. He watched the motion of her throat as she swallowed, entranced by the delicate movement of muscles beneath the pale, flawless skin. A drop of water escaped at the corner of her mouth. Mesmerized, Hawk watched it run down her chin, hang there for a moment before running down her neck and onto the top of her breast.
“Thank you.”
Hawk’s body jerked slightly as he came out of his dream state. Suzette held the canteen out to him as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, then ran her fingers over the top of her breast in search of the errant drop of water. Hawk felt a burning desire so intense he had to turn and focus his attention on the distant horizon to keep from taking her in his arms. “I need to check the horses’ hooves to make sure they haven’t picked up any stones.”
“I can help.”
“Stay here. No reason for both of us to get a heat stroke.”
He headed toward the nearest horse without waiting for her to respond. He practically walked into a creosote bush before he could get his mind to focus. He had to start paying attention. If he blundered into a cholla cactus, the thorns could give him a serious infection.
The mare, a sorrel, didn’t object when he lifted her foot. He forced himself to examine the hoof rim for wear, the hoof walls for gouges, the frog for possible bruises. He even felt the muscles in her legs to make sure they weren’t overheated. By the time he’d finished with the third mare, the pressure in his body had eased enough for him to take a deep breath. He didn’t know what he was going to do if they didn’t reach Laurie’s home tonight. He wasn’t sure he could stand another day of this. Hell, he hadn’t even survived the morning yet.
The sun beat down on his back as he bent to check the hooves of the next mare, a dun with a black mane and tail. She preferred to be left alone while she searched for graze.
“I’ll hold her head.”
Hawk decided he was getting old when Suzette could walk up behind him without his noticing. “She’s a bit cantankerous. This is her first foal.”
“I’d be nervous, too, if I was having my first child.”
Hawk busied himself with the mare’s feet. He didn’t want to think about Suzette having a baby.
“Have you found a stone?” Suzette asked.
“No. You’ve done a good job finding easy trails this morning.”
“It wasn’t hard. I just followed the ones the wild animals have already made.”
“They’re not always easy to see. You have a good eye.”
He wondered how she could have grown so comfortable with travel in the desert. Her background—growing up privileged, then working in a saloon—wasn’t exactly the best training ground for survival in the wild. He moved to the next mare, an Appaloosa. She was as sweet-tempered as she was beautiful. Suzette patted her neck while he checked her hooves.
“Why are you trying to avoid me?”
The question caught Hawk by surprise. He held the mare’s right front hoof without seeing it. It was a difficult decision: lie and have her know he was lying, or tell the truth and make her aware of the effect she was having on him. He released the mare’s leg and stood. “Because being alone with you is driving me crazy. It’s causing me to . . . well . . .”
It shocked Hawk to see a slow smile curve Suzette’s lips. He’d expected her to be embarrassed at the least, to launch into a noisy tirade at the worst.
“What makes you think you’re the only one who can feel a strong physical attraction? I’m sure there have been lots of women who didn’t hesitate to let you know you’re a very handsome man.”
Hawk was glad he had his hand on the Appaloosa’s withers. Suzette’s words had rocked him so badly he needed the solidness of the mare’s body to steady himself. He’d never met a woman who was so willing to speak of her physical desires for a man or who appeared so unembarrassed by them.
“Don’t look so stunned,” Suzette said. “I’ve been married. It wasn’t a good marriage, but it was good enough to teach me that men and women can take great pleasure in their physical relationship. My husband has been dead for five years, but I haven’t forgotten what it was like to sleep with a man.”
Try as he might, Hawk couldn’t find his tongue. Nor could he form a coherent thought.
“I didn’t want to offend you,” he finally managed to say. “Besides, I’m sure that on some occasions you’ve had reason to be afraid of a man who—”
“Yes, but I’m not afraid of you.”
She continued to pat the mare’s neck, but when the mare moved away to look for more grass, they were left standing alone facing each other. Hawk didn’t know what she meant by her statement. More important, he didn’t know what she wanted him to do about it—if she wanted him to do anything about it. She couldn’t mean what was running through his mind—not when Zeke could show up with the wagon at any minute—but what did she mean? It was obvious from the way she was looking at him, steady, her gaze open and trusting, that she meant something.
“Which mare do you want to check next?” Suzette asked.
At least he was sure of one thing. She wasn’t talking about checking horses’ hooves. “The paint,” he said and followed Suzette as she walked to where the small, short-coupled mare was quickly decimating a patch of grama grass. They finished checking the rest of the horses without returning to the subject that was burning a hole in Hawk’s mind. He had used the time to sort through his thoughts, catalog the possible meanings of her words, and decide on the most tactful way to find out what he wanted to know. But his plan had to be postponed when the wagon lumbered into sight.
“You’d better check on Laurie,” Josie called out before the wagon came to a stop. “I think her temperature is going up.”
Hawk had expected that. The rising temperature inside the wagon as the sun neared its zenith, in addition to the irritation of being tossed around, would inevitably make Laurie hotter. It was probably best that he hadn’t gotten a chance to tell Suzette the things he’d been thinking of. She couldn’t have meant what he’d thought. Spending time with Laurie would give him a chance to bring his own temperature down. Maybe then he could think clearly. If not, he was in for a rough night.
“Of course you’ll stay the night with us,” Laurie’s father said to Hawk and Zeke. “Put your horses in the corral. I’d offer you a place to sleep in the house, but Laurie’s friends are taking our only spare room.”
“Thank you, but that’s not necessary,” Zeke said.
“If I let you leave now, my wife would never let me hear the end of it, not after you brought our Laurie home and took such good care of her.”
“We didn’t do anything,” Hawk said. “We just traveled along with the women.”
The last hours of the trip had been tense. The heat and the
discomfort of traveling over rough ground in a wagon with nothing to absorb the shock had worn Laurie down until Hawk had begun to worry if she’d make it home. He’d considered stopping to give her a chance to rest, but she had begged him to get her home as quickly as possible. Now that she was home again, she already looked better.
“That’s not what my daughter told me,” Mr. Pettinger said. “She said she would probably have died without your medicine.”
Zeke didn’t want to spend the night on Mr. Pettinger’s farm any more than Hawk did, but there seemed little sense in refusing his invitation, especially since it was too late to travel more than a few miles before they’d have to make camp. Besides, he looked forward to eating a meal that hadn’t been cooked over a campfire.
“You sure you won’t stay longer?” Mrs. Pettinger asked Suzette.
“Thank you, ma’am, but we need to be on our way.”
Suzette experienced a pang of regret at having to leave the Pettingers’ place. It had been a comfort to spend an evening in a genuinely loving home, a real delight to eat good food and enjoy convivial company, a great comfort to go to bed and fall asleep without the shouts of drunks or the smells of alcohol and tobacco. The visit reminded her so much of when her mother was alive that she felt her death more keenly than she had in a long time. And the absence of her sister, whom she hadn’t seen since her own marriage six years ago.
“My husband and I feel we ought to do something to show our appreciation to you for bringing Laurie home to us,” Mrs. Pettinger said.
“Giving us a bed for the night and doubling our supplies is more than enough reward,” Josie said.
Neither Suzette’s nor Josie’s protests had been enough to stop Laurie’s parents from loading them down with food, an extra quilt in case it got colder, and home remedies to ward off sickness. Even now, as they waited for Zeke to arrive with the mules, they suspected Mrs. Pettinger would try to put something else in their wagon if they turned their backs.
“I feel like I ought to do more,” Mrs. Pettinger said. “Our daughter could have died.”
“Then thank Hawk,” Suzette said. “He’s the one who knew what to do to bring down her temperature and what herbs would make her feel better.”
She was disturbed by Mrs. Pettinger’s attitude toward Hawk. Her discomfort when he was present the evening before had been impossible to miss. No white man could have been more polite or more cordial, but Mrs. Pettinger’s relief when Hawk and Zeke left had been so obvious, Suzette had been hard-pressed not to ask if she was afraid Hawk might scalp them in their sleep.
“Please thank him for me,” Mrs. Pettinger said, her gaze swinging toward the path Zeke would use to bring the mules. “I must tell you I don’t feel easy knowing you will be alone on the trail with those men.”
“Your daughter wouldn’t be with you now if it weren’t for those men,” Suzette said, trying hard to keep her voice level, her expression neutral. “It they hadn’t fixed our wagon, we’d still be at the creek.”
“But Anna’s young man would have helped you when he arrived,” Mrs. Pettinger said.
“We’ll be quite safe with Hawk and Zeke.” Tension had been gathering in Suzette all morning, first from having to stave off the Pettingers’ excessive largesse, and now from trying to hold her tongue in the face of Mrs. Pettinger’s groundless prejudice. “In fact, I wish they were going to travel with us the rest of the way to Tombstone.”
She hadn’t meant to say that—had only said it, she was sure, because Mrs. Pettinger had angered her—but she knew it was true the moment the words were out of her mouth. Aside from her physical attraction to Hawk, she’d started to like him. He wasn’t very talkative and had yet to tell her much about himself, but she’d never met a man as kind and thoughtful. It must have annoyed him to have to prolong his own journey to stay with the wagon and take care of Laurie, but never once had he made her feel she was imposing on him. And though it was obvious to Suzette that he desired her, he’d never done anything to make her uncomfortable or fearful.
“It’s very brave of you to travel such a long distance on your own,” Mrs. Pettinger said. “I would have expected you to hire a guide.”
“I hadn’t thought of that,” Suzette said to Josie. “Do you think Hawk and Zeke would be our guides?”
“I didn’t mean them,” Mrs. Pettinger hastened to say.
Suzette realized Mrs. Pettinger’s fears were based upon the very real fact that some Indians had committed atrocities. What was unfair was that white men who’d committed equally vile acts were treated as heroes. She was relieved to see Zeke coming with the mules. “Josie, why don’t you help Zeke with the mules while I go inside to say good-bye to Laurie?” As much as she appreciated the Pettingers’ hospitality, she couldn’t wait to leave. The strength of her anger at Mrs. Pettinger’s attitude toward Hawk surprised her. She hadn’t realized she’d come to like him so much. It was probably a good thing they were going to go their separate ways for the rest of the journey. Hawk had no place in her plans for the future.
“Are you going to ask Hawk and Zeke to travel with you?” Laurie asked when Suzette entered her room. She was still sick, but she already looked better for being home and in her own bed.
“Why would we do that?” Suzette asked.
“Because it’s dangerous for two women to travel alone. They’d take good care of you.”
“Your mother doesn’t think so.”
“Mother will never stop being afraid of Indians and distrustful of black men, but that’s no reason I have to feel the same way, especially after Hawk took such good care of me.”
“We can’t ask them to slow down enough to stay with us,” Suzette said. “We’ve already held them up long enough.”
“I bet they’d do it if you asked.”
“Well, I’m not going to ask, and you can be sure Josie won’t.” Suzette needlessly rearranged the quilt over Laurie, plumped a pillow, and positioned the water pitcher a few inches closer to her. “I don’t think he likes Josie any more than she likes him.”
Laurie was pale with dark circles under her eyes. “Of course he likes Josie. How can a man not like a woman that beautiful?”
“When that woman makes it plain she doesn’t like him and wants nothing to do with him.”
“She’s only doing that because he doesn’t make a fool of himself over her like other men. Regardless of what Josie says, she wants men to make a fuss over her.”
“Of course she does. It’s the way she judges her appeal to an audience. When they stop making a fuss over us, we’ll have to find another way to make a living.”
“Josie may not like Zeke yet, but she’s intrigued by him. Just like you’re intrigued by Hawk.”
Averting her gaze, Suzette started to fuss with the quilt again. “I don’t know if you’re right about Josie, but you’re right about me. However, it doesn’t matter. We’ll never see those men after today.”
Laurie grabbed Suzette’s hand to keep her from fussing. “You could change that.”
Suzette pulled away. “You know why I can’t.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes.”
Suzette didn’t like the look Laurie gave her. It clearly said she thought Suzette was making a mistake, but Suzette didn’t have time for a romantic interlude with Hawk. She already had a pressing job—to make sure her sister didn’t suffer the way she had. Besides, even though she liked men, she didn’t trust them. None of them appeared able or willing to live up to their commitments. And a man who’d reached Hawk’s age without getting married was clearly a man who didn’t want commitments.
“Don’t worry about me and Josie,” Suzette said. “Stay here with your parents, get well, and meet some nice farmer boy.”
“I think I’ll do that,” Laurie said with a weak smile. “I used to think my life was unbearably boring, and I couldn’t wait to get away. But almost from the time I got to Globe, all I wanted was to come home. I can’t thank you enough for bri
nging me here.”
“We couldn’t think of leaving you. Now give me one last hug. I’ve been expecting Josie to drag me out of here for the last five minutes.”
She hugged Laurie, only slightly jealous that she wasn’t the one to sleep in a soft bed under a handmade quilt, to live in a snug house, to know that her future was safe and secure. Yet as she stepped through the door, she realized she would have felt confined by the life Laurie would lead.
Outside, Suzette saw that Zeke had brought up the mules, but nothing, had been done to harness them to the wagon. Instead, Josie and Zeke were squared off against one another like two young roosters. If Suzette didn’t do something in a hurry, the fur would begin to fly.
Chapter Five
Suzette didn’t know whether to intervene or let them battle it out. Those two had been spoiling for a fight from the moment they’d met, each encounter ratcheting up the tension another notch. Now they were so wrapped up in their confrontation, they appeared to have forgotten they were supposed to be harnessing the mules. Hands clenched at his sides, Zeke was glaring at Josie dangerously.
“I have no doubt men whose jobs keep them from seeing many women gape at you like starving kids at a table loaded with food, but I’m not starved for a woman.”
“Is that why you can’t keep your hands off me? Or your eyes?”
“I look at you because you get in my way,” Zeke snapped. “Only a woman who thinks every man finds her irresistible would interpret every accidental contact while harnessing a couple of mules as an inability to keep his hands off her.”
“So you didn’t touch me?”
“It certainly wasn’t intentional.” Zeke walked around Josie, picked up a collar and lifted it over the head of one of the mules. Josie followed suit with the other.
“So it was an accident that your arms just happened to be around me.”
Zeke turned, his hold on his temper tenuous. “Since you don’t know enough about harnessing mules to know when to move out of the way, I had to reach around you.”
The Mavericks Page 6
