Reign or Shine

by Мишель Роуэн

  My head was spinning. A servant. Michael was a servant! "What is a Shadow?"

  "The Shadowlands were once home to beings called Shadows. They were a part of the chaos that threatened the worlds beyond before the demons brought order here again. The Shadows that remained afterward were enslaved to us."

  I felt stunned. "So you're saying he's a… a slave?"

  My father looked confused by my stuttering reaction to this news. "We treat our Shadows very well and give them many freedoms, but yes. If it wasn't for us they would have been completely destroyed. Michael has been particularly helpful to me over the years."

  "He lives here?"

  "Yes, he was brought to the castle as a child-he is unaffected by the unavoidable solitude this place brings with it. Since he is around your age, I thought him best to travel to the human realm to bring you to see me. He's been very loyal to me, and because of this I've given him certain privileges that most Shadows would never be allowed. But…" He looked at me sharply. "Michael is not boyfriend material, if that's what you're thinking."

  My face flushed. "Boyfriend material!"

  "Even if he wasn't a Shadow. . you are a princess, and therefore high above a mere servant."

  "I'm starting to figure out why he didn't want to tell me what he really was," I said icily.

  My father's expression grew more severe. "You asked Michael a direct question and he refused to answer?"

  "No. Please, forget it."

  "I recognize the signs, Nikki, and it worries me." "The signs?"

  "He doesn't look at you as I'd expect a servant to look at a princess. I fear that he's forgotten his place. I'll have to speak with him."

  I couldn't believe this. Why hadn't Michael just told me? Because he was embarrassed? Ashamed of what he was?

  "Michael saved my life," I said, for lack of anything else to say.

  He stiffened. "What do you mean?"

  "There was a guy with a knife earlier when I was walking home from school. He tried to kill me and Michael saved me. That. . that amulet he wears-he was able to blast the guy away like he was nothing."

  It took my father a moment to say anything to that. "Why didn't he mention this to me? Shadows aren't permitted to harness their powers, especially not in the human realm. It's too dangerous." He paced the room for a moment. "But if he did it to save you then I suppose this indiscretion can be forgiven." He turned to look at me again. "Was this attacker a human?"

  "He looked human, but I think he was a demon. He called me Princess."

  His expression shadowed. "I don't know how this is possible, Michael is the only one that I authorized to travel to the human realm. How would this assassin even know of your existence?"

  I shrugged. "He could have slipped through."

  "It must be because my powers are weakened by my illness. It's the only explanation I can think of." My father shook his head gravely. "You're okay, though?"

  I was too focused on these newfound revelations about Michael to obsess any more about the big guy with the knife. "I survived."

  "I'm very glad." He didn't say anything for a moment. And then, "Has Michael told you anything else about himself?"

  "Not much." I swallowed. "But, he did say that if he didn't return here in a couple of days he'd die. Is that true?"

  My father stood up and walked toward the fire. The light illuminated his stern, handsome features. "The green stone amulet he wears is made from what was once a large deposit here in the Shadowlands back when his kind ruled. They drew their power from it."

  "Do all Shadows have green eyes?" I asked.

  He looked at me. "Yes, they do."

  "When he blasted the guy, the amulet kind of went dull and so did the color of his eyes."

  "He was weakened from using his abilities in the human realm."

  "But he recovered. Kind of like recharging his battery."

  He nodded. "Yes, it is much like that. Michael needs his amulet to sustain his life force. In order to take the land, the demons had to destroy the deposit and clear most of it away. But since Shadows need it for survival, they were each given a small piece of it that they could wear on the outside of their clothing at all times. To keep the energy charged, Michael must remain in the Shadowlands or the Underworld, or else he will steadily weaken."

  I tried to add this new information to my already full brain. On the bright side, my headache from earlier hadn't shown up ever since the incident with Robert. "I don't understand why the demons had to take the land at all. Why couldn't they share it with the Shadows?"

  My father's harsh expression softened with a small smile. "You are asking me to condense a millennium of history into a few minutes. Shadows are. . very stubborn, difficult to control, and as you saw by what Michael did to your assailant, they are also very powerful when they have the chance to be. They are unpredictable by nature. When presented with the option of joining us, the Shadow king declined. Rather rudely, from what I understand. Unfortunately, they left us with no other choice but to use force." He paused for a moment. "Michael is a direct descendant of that king, so he does come by his insolence naturally."

  I sucked in a breath of air and clutched the side of the table tightly. "So he's actually a prince?"

  "No." He shook his head. "Michael is your servant. And neither he nor you should ever forget that."

  I heard something at the entranceway and looked over. Michael had reentered the room in time to hear the last thing my father had said. His expression looked stricken.

  "Michael," my father said, "why didn't you tell Nikki who you really are?"

  His gaze was now firmly fixed on the floor. "I should have, Your Majesty."

  "Please tell her now."

  I could barely breathe. Why was my father making him do this?

  Then Michael glanced at me and our eyes met. He looked ashamed-of who he was or of how he had kept the truth from me, I didn't know-and it made my heart twist sharply.

  "I am your servant, Princess." He choked out the words. "And it was wrong of me to keep this from you. I'm very sorry."

  That's why he called me Princess instead of Nikki. It was a term of respect. He'd been assigned to find me, tell me about who I was, and keep me safe.

  He didn't tell me who he was-he was vague and avoided the question- because he didn't want me to know the truth.

  But now I knew.

  "Michael, you can wait downstairs until Nikki is ready to go home," my father said sternly. "Thank you." Michael turned and left the room.

  I felt sick. He'd been completely humiliated. I wanted to hate my father for what had just happened, but when I looked at him he simply looked back at me curiously, as if he couldn't understand why I was so upset.

  Servants were a normal daily thing for him here, and what he'd done hadn't been cruel or unusual for him. But not for me. Not like that. And not to Michael.

  "What is it, Nikki?" he asked softly. "Why are you upset?"

  Before I could say anything, somebody else walked into the room. It was a beautiful woman with long blonde hair, flawless translucent skin, and a wide, friendly smile.

  For some reason, my already aching heart dropped a little more. The queen. Had to be. My father may have felt badly about leaving my mother all those years ago, but that didn't mean that he hadn't moved on.

  "My goodness," she said. "What did you say to Michael? He looked very distressed."

  "He'll be fine," my father said. "Please, Elizabeth, come and meet Nikki."

  She didn't take her attention off me as she approached and reached out to clasp my hand in hers. "Nikki," she said, beaming at me, "I'm so thrilled to meet you. I'm Desmond's sister, Elizabeth."

  I raised my eyebrows with surprise at that introduction. "You're my aunt. So you're not married to my father?"

  She smiled a bit wider. "Well, that would be rather inappropriate, wouldn't it?" Then her smile faded a bit. "You also look rather distressed. This is all horribly overwhelming for you, isn't it?"


  "You could say that."

  She touched my shoulder. "I know. Believe me, I know. This would be surprising news-to find out your Darkling nature-on a good day. Let alone with everything else that's happening here.. " Her eyes grew misty and she glanced over her shoulder. "Are you feeling all right, Desmond?"

  He'd moved to the table and leaned against it, a hand to his stomach again. "Well enough."

  Even I could tell he was lying. He was feeling pain again and, despite what had happened with Michael, concern for him welled up inside me.

  Elizabeth shook her head and then went to the long black table. She poured a goblet of water from the pitcher there and brought it to him.

  "Drink this," she said.

  He lifted it to his lips and drank.

  She glanced at me. "You do know that your father is gravely ill?"

  My throat thickened and I nodded.

  Her attention moved to the vial I still held in my hand. "You've given her the potion, Desmond?"

  "I have."

  My head still swam from all the information I'd received. Meeting my aunt only added to it. "So if I take the potion. . when my father. . when he. ." I swallowed, not wanting to finish that sentence. "Who will take over the throne?"

  Elizabeth helped my father into the chair and stroked the hair back from his face. His skin had gone very pale.

  "Elizabeth and I have already discussed this, Nikki," my father said weakly. "She's consented to take the throne. After you, she's next in line."

  "So that means. .," I began. "That. . that you won't be able to leave here either? That you'll be stuck here in this castle?"

  "Don't worry about me. I'll manage. Although, I may consider redecorating." Elizabeth gave me a small smile. "Truly, Nikki, it's the best solution in this unfortunate matter. You shouldn't have to deal with this burden at your age. Especially only learning about it now."

  When my father died, Elizabeth would be trapped here without being allowed to leave, and she was doing it of her own free will.

  "I'm sorry," I said.

  "Don't be. I only wish I could have met you before all of this. I would have loved the chance to get to know you better."

  I clutched the vial tightly in my hand and thought how when I drank its contents I'd forget all of this. I'd forget my father, and Elizabeth. . and Michael. I hadn't known any of them a couple of days ago and now it actually hurt to think that I wouldn't be able to see them again.

  But it was the only way.

  My father let out a small groan of pain. And then a larger one as he stood up, then doubled over and clutched the side of the table.

  "Desmond." Elizabeth grabbed his shoulders. "Are you all right?"

  "No. ." He gritted his teeth. "I need to go back to my room. I… I feel poorly. Very poorly."

  And then he yelled out. The sound of his pain cut right through me like an icy wind.

  I ran to his side. "Dad-" "No, get away." His voice came out loud and gravelly. "Please, Nikki. Don't come any closer."

  I heard a ripping sound and watched with horror as two large, black, leathery wings unfurled from his back. His hands went out to his sides and long, sharp claws emerged from the tips of his fingers.

  I took a step back and covered my mouth with my hand.

  He straightened up and looked at me. His eyes were red with catlike slits and appeared to glow in the semi-darkness of the room. There were horns-big, black, curved horns- protruding from the sides of his head. His face had grown unrecognizable, sharper, more pointed, his skin now black as coal. I got a glimpse of his teeth, which were now pointed and as sharp as razors.

  He covered his stomach with a clawed hand-his chest had grown larger and muscular enough to burst the buttons on his gray shirt-and he convulsed.

  Even in demon form he was still in terrible pain.

  "Nikki," he said in that strange, demonic voice, "I'm sorry. I didn't want you to see me like this and be afraid," I believe my answer to that may have been a short, terrified scream. I'm not entirely positive.

  He gasped for breath. "Drink the potion and forget about all of this. It's for the best."

  His now-sharp jaw clenched and with a last look at me, the demon king turned and quickly left the room.

  Chapter 10

  I stood in place shaking from head to foot. My father was a demon.

  A monster with big, black, batlike wings and sharp teeth like something out of a nightmare.

  "No," I said out loud, shaking my head, even though I'd now seen it with my own eyes. It was true. There was no denying it anymore. I started to cry. I couldn't hold it in. My chest heaved with sobs.

  I felt a warm hand on my back and I jumped, spinning around. It was Elizabeth. I scrambled back from her. She was a demon, too, and she would look like my father in her demon form. This human form-it wasn't real. It was just a lie. She was evil. Demonic.

  "Nikki." Her eyes were glossy. "Please, don't be afraid. I know this is difficult for you, but please just try to calm down."

  I looked over at the entranceway. Where was Michael? He'd said he'd stay by my side and not leave me, and now he was gone. Why? He'd promised that nobody was going to hurt me.

  And nobody had. Nobody had hurt me.

  I forced myself to breathe normally and I looked at Elizabeth-really looked at her. She didn't look evil or demonic. She looked concerned. For me. She'd backed away after my reaction to her to give me some space.

  "I'm not going to hurt you," she assured me. "Everything will be fine."

  It took me another couple of minutes before I felt anywhere close to fine, and even then I still felt jumpy.

  "What happened?" I asked shakily. "Wh-why did he change like that?"

  She took in a deep breath. "He's in a great deal of pain. It is just as it was with my father when he was near the end. In demon form we're able to handle pain better. It doesn't make it go away but it becomes more manageable. A human body is more aesthetically pleasing, but it makes us very fragile. Right now, Desmond can't control the shift. When he experiences intense pain, he simply turns to demon form. I know he didn't want to scare you, Nikki. It's the last thing he wanted."

  I looked over at the entranceway. "Is he going to be okay?"

  But that sounded stupid. He wasn't going to be okay. He was going to die.

  "He'll be fine in a bit. We must leave him alone and let him recover enough to change form again." She patted my cheek. "Honestly, I think the best thing for you would be to let Michael take you home. You should probably drink the potion, too, and in minutes all of this will have faded away."

  I looked at the potion bottle again. "Okay. I'm going to drink it." I put the chain over my head and let the vial fall against my chest. "But I'm going to wait until tomorrow, though. I… I still need to think about some things."

  I wasn't ready to forget. Not this quickly. I'd have plenty of time tomorrow when I was back in my normal life. It could wait until then.

  "I understand. But don't wait too long. It's dangerous to wait now that you're sixteen."

  My eyebrows went up at that and I shifted my focus from the entranceway of the dark, cavernous room to my aunt. "Dangerous?"

  She nodded gravely. "I'm sure Desmond didn't go into specific details, but there's a very good reason why there hasn't been a Darkling in a thousand years. You've been very lucky that you haven't experienced any serious consequences."

  I looked questioningly at her. "What are you talking about?"

  She wrung her hands together and walked over to the table, before turning back to me. Her beautiful face was tense and worried. "Desmond had me look into the history of Darklings when he first began to sense you, and I found out some things. Things I didn't want to burden him with in his current condition."

  "What kinds of things?"

  She didn't speak for a moment. "No Darkling has ever lived past their eighteenth year. It's the human/demon mix. It's unstable. Those who have lived that long refrained from using any of their powers at a
ll. It's the only way."

  "You mean, if I don't take the potion and become completely human then I'm going to die?" I managed.

  She pressed her lips together. "But you have the potion. You will take it, and you will forget about all of this."

  "But. . but my father said that I was the heir. That if he died then I would become queen. He didn't say anything about this."

  "That's because he doesn't know." She sighed. "If there was another way, believe me, I'd want to learn what it is. I don't want to be queen, you know. I don't want to never be able to leave this place, but it has to be done." She touched my shoulder tentatively. "Take the rest of the night and let it all sink in, if you wish. But tomorrow morning, drink the potion. Forget about all of this and live a happy, normal life, Nikki."

  I nodded shakily. "Okay."

  "But please remember one very important thing." "What's that?"

  "In the meantime, don't allow your powers to manifest. At all. They're triggered by extreme emotions. Stress, anger, fear… I know you've had your share of all of that today, and I'm worried about you. Do you understand?"

  I nodded again. "I understand."

  "Good." She rubbed a tear away from my cheek with her thumb. "I will take care of your father, I promise. I'll make his last days as comfortable as possible. I know he was so happy to find out that you existed. And he was so happy to get the chance to meet you before the end. Please know that even in his demon form, your father cares about you and would never wish you harm in any way."

  I blinked back more tears. "I'm glad I met him, too. I just wish I had more time."

  "Me, too."

  I hugged her and she smelled like warm jasmine. I felt something press against my collarbone and looked down.

  "You have a vial, too?" I asked, glancing at the small blue bottle she wore around her neck on a chain.

  She touched it lightly. "It's perfume-a gift from my inamorato… or what you might call my 'boyfriend.'" Her expression turned forlorn and wistful. "I'm hoping he'll want to visit me when I'm unable to leave this castle."