The Sanctuary

by Arika Stone

  “You’re a wise man.” I laughed. He wouldn’t win anyway.

  He pulled out a purple scarf and matching hat.

  “Oh no, you’re not wearing that.” I pulled the hideous items out of his hands. “It will clash with me.”

  Val leaned on the closet door. “I give up. What would you like me to wear?”

  “Anything but purple. Something that looks good next to me.”

  “I thought I looked good next to you?” he teased.

  “My, my, isn’t your head big? Just find something. I have to do my makeup.” I headed into the bathroom.

  He sauntered in a few moments later.

  “That’s not what you're wearing, is it?” I stared at him. He was dressed in tuxedo pants, a jacket and a V-neck black tee. “You look like you’re headed to a funeral.”

  “With your attitude today, I may be.” He grabbed the eyeliner out of my bag and started putting it on. “Give me a break, will you?”

  “Sorry, I’m irritable.”

  “It’s okay. We all have those days. But I’m not the enemy, remember that.”

  “I think I need a Xanax or a Valium or something. I’m on edge.”

  Val opened the medicine cabinet. “What would you prefer?”

  I stared into the open cabinet; it was filled with prescription bottles. “Do you take all this shit?”

  “When I need to or, now, when you need to.”

  “You don’t take all of this, do you?” I wondered if I was dating a junkie. I never saw so much legal dope in one place.

  “Not anymore, but I used to have panic attacks. Do you want anything?” He handed me a bottle of Xanax.

  I looked at the date. The script was two years old. I shook my head. “No, those are too strong. I’ll pass out if I take one.”

  “Quarter the stick then.”

  “It’s still a half of a milligram. I’ll fall asleep.” I was curious about his panic attacks. “Do you still get attacks?”

  “Occasionally, but not like I used to.”

  “What caused them?”

  He looked at me in the mirror. “An irritable ex.” He leaned down to kiss me on the neck. “Don’t worry. It’s in the past. I’m okay now.”

  I thought it would be best to change the subject. I didn’t need any more drama before the show. “Do you think they will pre-interview us? This show isn’t live, is it?”

  “No and no. They are going to pop some questions we won’t expect them to ask. That I am sure of.”

  “These things make me nervous.” I finished my makeup and twiddled with my hair.

  “Relax, I’ll handle it.”

  “Right, you’re a pro…” I left the bathroom and proceeded downstairs. I didn’t want to talk to him anymore.

  “Eve…” he called out, but I needed to go outside and get fresh air. My nerves were getting the best of me. I knew if I didn’t settle down I’d blow this interview.

  Three hours later, I was shaking my foot, waiting under the hot lights to hear those famous little numbers.

  “On three…”

  And there they were. I gripped Val’s hand. This was unnerving. He whispered to me, “Deep breath.”

  “Two.”

  Little did he know as soon as we were on I would be cool, calm, collected, and professional.

  “One.”

  “And we’re on…”

  “Good evening, everyone. I’m Phineas Chatfield, and you’re watching OMG! TV. Tonight we have an exclusive interview with two of the hottest celebrities everyone’s been talking about, Val Ruska and Eve Lauren.”

  Mr. Chatfield turned to us. “Welcome.”

  Val draped his arm on the couch behind me, taking the alpha role. “Thank you, we are glad to be here tonight.”

  Mr. Chatfield focused his attention on me. “Eve, you are quite the shining star in America, but your European fans know little about your history. Is your rags to riches story true?”

  “I’m not sure if 'star' or 'rags to riches' are accurate descriptions. I started my event planning company, Luxe Life, on a shoestring budget in college. It blossomed into what it is today, catering to an all-star clientele.”

  “But your story is much more than that. I read you struggled your entire life. Your parents died when you were seven, and you moved in with relatives you hardly knew. What can you tell us about your childhood? How has it impacted your success?”

  I clenched my teeth in a smile and shot a sideways glance at Val.

  Val interjected, “I don’t think this has anything to do with the reason we are here tonight.”

  I placed my hand on Val’s knee and turned my attention to Mr. Chatfield. “I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. My past shaped who I am today, but it doesn’t control who I am. Everyone struggles with obstacles. I wouldn’t have my life any other way.”

  It was a textbook answer I was skilled with, generalize and relate to the audience.

  “It’s wonderful to hear stories of people overcoming obstacles. All of your life, you’ve searched for love in a way. I suppose it was natural to go into event and wedding planning?”

  “People search for love all the time, Phineas. I think it’s natural to want love and to be loved. Wedding planning comes naturally to me; I am in love with the concept of love.” I felt confident in my answers.

  “And in your quest for love, you were previously dating Jude Wright, the co-founder of Smith & Wright Entertainment Agency. Correct?”

  I sighed. “Yes, Jude and I dated, but it’s in the past.” I smiled at Val.

  Mr. Chatfield had a funny look on his face, “Well, Eve, I’m not sure how in the past Jude is to you.” He stood up. “Please welcome Mr. Jude Wright.”

  My heart pounded with each step Jude took as he approached the set. He looked stunning in his Armani suit and his perfectly coiffed espresso hair. I got up from the couch. “I’m leaving.” I couldn’t deal with seeing him. Val followed.

  “Cut!” someone shouted.

  “Eve, please,” Jude called out as I neared the exit.

  I could feel the tension building inside, and my heart started to race as I clenched my fists. I abruptly turned on my heels, knocking into Val, who was directly behind me.

  “No, Eve, just go.” Val was determined to leave.

  I pushed past him in a fury. I wasn’t going to back down from Jude. He had no right to come here, and I was determined to give him a piece of my mind.

  Val interjected, “Eve!”

  But I ignored his calls. I approached Jude. “Why are you here?”

  “I want to explain.”

  “Fuck you!” I slapped him across the face. “You have the balls to come here, to what? Break up my relationship?”

  Jude grabbed my arm. “It’s not what you think.”

  “Let go of me.” I tried shaking him from my arm, but he wouldn’t let go.

  “You heard the lady. Let her go,” Val said from behind in a commanding voice.

  “And what are you going to do about it?” Jude turned his attention to Val.

  “It’s over! I will not tolerate a man who cheats on me.”

  “But I didn’t cheat on you, Eve,” Jude stated somberly.

  “Like hell you didn’t.” I shook him off, pushing him with all my might.

  Val stepped in between us. “Eve, you’re going to get arrested for assault. Let’s go.” He wrapped his arm around me and steered me toward the exit.

  “Don’t worry, Eve. We’ll work this out. I know where you’re staying,” Jude said.

  I turned to lunge at him again, but Val held me back. “If you come to my house, Jude, I will call the police. I want nothing to do with you!” I shouted.

  “Your house? Don’t you mean his house? Oh, how you’ve changed, Eve. It took you four years before you lived with me. You moved in with him after what, a week? Did you come here to live out your groupie fantasies?”

  “Fuck you!”

  Val shook me. “That’s enough. We�
�re leaving.”

  The producers approached us. “We’ll get him out of here, but we need you to finish the interview.”

  “Give us a few minutes,” Val said, pulling me into the hallway.

  We headed out of the studio into the freezing cold night. It sent a shock through my body.

  “Are you all right?”

  “I’m fine.” I inhaled the cold air. For the first time, there was an uncomfortable silence between us. “I’m sorry you saw that side of me. I hate him.”

  “It’s ok. I understand. Ex’s have a way of doing that.” Val smiled.

  I continued, “He always tries to play mind games. He thinks I’m one of his clients he can schmooze. I know the truth. I know he cheated on me. Why else would he have a girl in his hotel room?”

  Val grabbed me and embraced me. “Stop. It’s over.”

  I began crying in his arms. “I hate that I can’t have a normal relationship with you. I hate I have baggage.”

  “We all have our baggage. Can I be honest with you?”

  “Of course.”

  “Kat, my ex, tried to kill me. She attacked me one night because she thought I was cheating on her. And honestly, seeing you explode in there triggered memories I’d like to forget.”

  I realized the weight of his words. “I’m not Kat,” I said, my voice choking up. “And you’re”—I sobbed—“not…”

  Val sighed. “I didn’t cheat on her. Maybe he didn’t cheat on you.”

  Chapter 16

  The fall began to slowly fade to winter. The days grew shorter, the nights longer and colder than I was used to.

  Our days normalized into a regular routine. Mornings were spent chatting over coffee before we began our own schedules. I began my days at the gym with Jenni, followed by Finnish classes at the university. Maaria taught me how to prepare traditional Finnish dishes, and dinner was always ready for Val when he came home from rehearsals or when he reared his head out of his art studio.

  He added me as a signatory to his bank account, so when he was away, things that needed to be taken care of could be. Not only did living with Val domesticate me, but it also dissolved all of my stress. My pace slowed, and as it did, I began to appreciate how beautiful life was.

  I also became more comfortable with the culture of the country. I studied Finnish whenever I could, practicing with Jenni and Maaria behind Val’s back. I wanted to surprise him.

  But no matter how hard I tried, the language eluded me. The written language was different than the spoken language. Words were formed by combining words, similar to compound words in English, but the Finns removed letters and combined phrases in odd ways, making their words extremely long and difficult to pronounce.

  Val entered the kitchen to get coffee. “Your nose is always in that book. Tell me what’s so intriguing about it.”

  “I’m just reading.” I shut the textbook, which I had covered to hide.

  Val sat down, sipping his coffee. “You’ve been very elusive about that,” he said, motioning to the book. “May I see it?”

  “It’s research. It will bore you.”

  “How can you be sure?” He eyed it. “Kama Sutra?” he teased.

  I laughed. “Is that all you think about?”

  “With you, yes.” A devilish grin appeared on his face. “Tell me what consumes you every night before we go to sleep, so much that I have to pull you away from it.”

  I contemplated telling him. If I did, I could save myself an early morning trip to Jenni’s to finish my homework. I decided to keep the charade going. “It’s nothing.”

  “I don’t like it when you keep secrets.”

  “It’s not a secret.”

  “Then what is it?”

  “Research. That’s all. Why are you so curious?”

  Val puckered his lips and eyed the book again, this time noticing paper sticking out of the top of the book. With a swift motion, he seized the book, flipped it open, and pulled my paper out.

  “Val!” I whined.

  “You’re studying Finnish? Why didn’t you tell me?”

  “I wanted to surprise you.”

  “Where did you get the book from?” he asked, interested in my new hobby.

  “The university. I’m taking classes. And that’s my homework you put your coffee on.”

  “Sorry.” He removed the cup from the paper and glanced down at it. “This is wrong. You need to…”

  “And that’s why I didn’t tell you about it.” I snatched the paper out of his hand.

  “You’re being silly, I can help you.”

  “Haista vittu!” It was the equivalent of “fuck you.”

  “I’m glad to hear my sister is teaching you all the proper things a girl needs to know.” He winked.

  “How did you know Jenni was helping me?”

  “My mother told me when I spoke to her last week. She said you stopped by with your homework because Jenni was working. She found it charming that you’re trying to assimilate.”

  I pouted. “She promised she would keep it a secret.”

  “Well, she lied.” Val laughed as he leaned in for a kiss.

  “Speaking of your family, Thanksgiving is Thursday. Can we celebrate?” I asked.

  “We don’t normally celebrate Thanksgiving. That’s an American holiday.”

  I was disappointed. “Well, I’d like to celebrate it, but I couldn’t find any turkeys in the market.”

  “You’re probably not going to find any unless you special order one. You should be able to find a butcher in Hakaniemi that can do it.”

  “Do you mind if I invite your family to celebrate too?”

  “If you want to.”

  “How’s seven o’clock? I don’t want to disturb your schedule or theirs.”

  He thought for a moment. “Seven o’clock can work. I think I’m rehearsing that day though.”

  I knew if he was in the studio rehearsing, he probably would lose track of time. “Will you promise to be home on time?”

  “If it will make you happy, then yes.” He kissed me on the cheek. “I have to go back to work. If you need help with your homework, let me know.”

  “I will.” I paused. “Don’t stay too long in that studio of yours. I would like to spend time with you tonight.”

  Val’s hand rested on the doorknob. “You know the exhibit is in two weeks. I have to finish before then.”

  I heard the frustration in his voice and saw the exhaustion in his eyes. “I know. I’m going to finish studying and head to bed. I guess I’ll see you in the morning.”

  He walked over and planted another kiss on my cheek. “Sweet dreams, darling. I will be up later. I promise.”

  I waited until he left before I called Jenni. I needed her help to find a turkey. I knew with Val’s work schedule he wouldn’t be of much assistance.

  “Hei, what’s up?”

  “What are you doing Thursday?” I asked.

  “Why? Are you planning a birthday party for Val?”

  “No. It’s his birthday?” I was surprised.

  “He didn’t tell you?”

  “No. But why didn’t you?”

  “I thought he would have told you.”

  “Thursday is Thanksgiving. I wanted to celebrate it.”

  “So do both. Surprise him with a cake after dinner,” Jenni said.

  “I need your help though. I need to find a turkey.”

  Jenni laughed. “We’ll go shopping after your class.”

  “Speaking of which, I need to come by early tomorrow. I’m struggling with the lesson. By the way, your mum told Val I was studying Finnish.”

  “I figured she would when you told me you had stopped by. Next time go to the shop. Dad is better at keeping secrets. Val is Mum’s favorite. You know how that goes.”

  Unfortunately, I didn’t. Having no siblings and no real family to speak of, I didn’t understand the inner workings of a family. “I suppose. I’ll see you in the morning.”

  I tapped my na
ils on the granite countertop. His birthday was four days away, and he hadn’t told me. But that point was moot now. I needed to find him a present, something that came from my heart.

  I began to flip though my phone’s contacts. Who could I call to lend me inspiration? Andy’s name lit up on the screen as I scrolled. I looked at my watch. It was midafternoon in New York City. I dialed his cell phone.

  “Eve! Where have you been?”

  “In Helsinki with my other boyfriend!” I laughed. Andy was a dear friend to me.

  “So I’ve heard. It’s been awhile. What’s going on?”

  “You’re not on a shoot, are you?”

  “No, but even if I was, I’d stop for you.” He laughed softly.

  “Aw…Andy. How much do you love me?”

  He chuckled. “What do you need?”

  “I need you to photograph me. Is there any way you could come to Helsinki tomorrow?”

  “You know I’ve always wanted to photograph you for my show.”

  I knew he was trying to negotiate. “And you know I can’t because of business.”

  “Really, Eve, what does business have to do with it? Sex sells. You know that.”

  “Fine. If you come tomorrow, I will let you use something. But it has to be tasteful.”

  “When am I not tasteful?”

  He made a valid point. He was one of the top boudoir photographers. His work was outstanding and artistic.

  “Do we have a deal?”

  “Exactly what are we talking about here?”

  “A few of hours of shooting. Ultimately, I need a large framed print, and I need it in hand for Thursday.”

  “Ouch. You’re killing me, kid.”

  “Shall I book a plane ticket for you?”

  “I can make it in Tuesday. But I have to be on the plane no later than Wednesday afternoon.”

  “Perfect, I’ll send you an e-ticket in a few. By the way, can you bring a turkey for me?”

  “A turkey?”

  “Yes, frozen too. It can defrost on the plane.”

  “Why?”

  “I can’t find a turkey here. We have all the reindeer you want, but no goddamn turkeys!”

  Chapter 17

  “Hello…I can’t pick you up. I have a Vespa. Go downstairs and grab a taxi. See you in a bit.”